Chapter 17
Why, in the name of sweet baby Jesus, did I drink so much? I peeled my eyelids open and examined the situation. I was at Ty’s house, which calmed me because I wasn’t sure what decisions I would have made if left to my own devices last night.
I swallowed, which was as painful as shards of glass scraping down my throat. I needed aspirin and something to drink. As I slowly stood up, the room was spinning, and nausea swirled in the pit of my stomach. But I managed to fight the urge.
I lurched into the kitchen but only made it as far as the barstool before I had to sit down. I held my head in my hands as tiny cloggers appeared to be doing a jig inside my brain.
“Ouch.” Ty came bebopping into the kitchen, looking like a cheerleader with too much pep. How the hell was he prancing around with a smile on his face when I appeared to be death warmed-over?
“How are you so chipper?” I was envious of him right now.
He handed me a water from the fridge with some ibuprofen. “I wasn’t the one who was drinking champagne directly from the bottle all night.” He laughed, and the noise caused me to flinch.
“How much?” I questioned because that didn’t sound like me, but yesterday was an exception, not a rule.
He bit his lower lip as if he was scared to say.
“Tell me?”
“Two bottles.”
“No wonder I’m in hell. Did anything else happen?”
He appeared sheepish as he turned away from me.
“Ty. Please tell me. I don’t have time for piecemeal.”
He exhaled deeply. “You begged our Uber driver to stop at Taco Bell. I said it was a bad idea, but you argued that a Cheesy Gordita was calling your name. You paid him fifty bucks to get one.”
I stared at him quizzically. “I’ve never wanted Taco Bell in my life.”
“Well, you did last night. But it turns out, you wanted more than one thing.” He covered his mouth to hide his smirk.
“What do you mean? What else did I get?”
He started to waffle, but I gave him my “don’t fuck with me” glare. “A Chalupa and a Locos Tacos Supreme.” His words came out so quickly, it took a minute for my brain to catch up.
“Are you serious? There is no way I ate all that.”
He nodded emphatically. “You did. Took them down like a vacuum. But it appeared to sober you up because you walked into the house by yourself and passed out on the couch while I climbed into my comfy king-sized bed.”
“Why did you let me do that?” I shouldn’t be mad at him because I made the choice, but I wasn’t coherent—he should have been my guardian ad litem, and looked out for my best interest.
“A pack of wolves couldn’t have stopped you from devouring that food last night. And I wasn’t about to lose a finger trying. Besides, you need to live a little.”
This wasn’t what I would call living. If anything, death could probably take me at any minute. “I need to shower.” It was the only thing that might make me human again.
“That’s a good idea.” He waved his hand in front of his nose, and I unassumingly sniffed myself, but I didn’t smell.
“You’re a jerk.” I socked him in the arm but immediately regretted it because the hostile movement made my head want to explode.
He rubbed the offending spot. “Jeez, Ali, I was kidding. Why don’t I run you home, and you can sleep it off?”
I nodded, then I had a slight panic attack. What if Steph was there? I didn’t want her to see me like this. She would for sure think something had happened last night, and I wasn’t ready to start another fight or talk about the first one.
“On second thought, let’s do a drive-by, and if Steph’s car is gone, I’ll go in. But if she’s still there, would you run in, grab the stuff I need, and bring me back here?” I all but pleaded.
“What, you don’t want Steph to see you in all your glory?” He chuckled, and I was about to smack him again but had learned that lesson.
“I’m not ready to see her, okay?”
“All right. I won’t make you beg.” He moved toward the garage, and I followed.
We climbed into the car, and he looked at me. “Please don’t refund your tacos in my car.”
“I’m fine.” I scowled at how much I ate, but there was nothing I could do about it now. “So, did anything else of importance happen last night?”
He backed out and headed toward my place. “Do you remember me setting up an appointment with a hypnotherapist for you on Monday?”
“A what?”
“Yeah, you decided hypnosis would help you uncover who the girl in your dream is. You mentioned it might be a repressed memory or something. You were all gung-ho about it last night.”
“That sounds nothing like me. You’ll need to cancel that because I’m not going. It sounds hokey.”
“Blake, don’t be like that. I already made the appointment and cleared your calendar. What harm could come from it? You might figure something out. Isn’t that what you want? You said you wanted to find out who she was and what was causing the dreams. Isn’t it worth a try to see if Dr. Hahn can help?”
I sighed. “Ugh. I guess I’ll do it. But I’m not happy about it.”
“Girl, are you ever happy?” He laughed, and I gave him a sideways glare, but his comment didn’t deserve a response.
I had been working on myself a lot lately and wanted to be more positive. But it seemed like as soon as I was, shit hit the fan. There was a reason for my hard shell; it kept me safe. And now that I had let down my guard, I exposed myself to vulnerability. I didn’t like it. I needed to become the Queen Bitch Ty thought I was. No, I didn’t want to do that either. I was so confused.
As he continued to drive, I rested my head against the seat while gazing out the window. He was singing with the radio to some pop song Id never heard. What was I going to do? Even now, after sobering up and having time to cool off, I still wasn’t ready to forgive Steph. Something in my gut was telling me she wasn’t the one for me.
We had our issues, but I genuinely hoped we could make things work if we tried. But that might be the blinders. We all saw what we wanted, and I guess I didn’t care enough to look deeper. What was it she said? I was complacent.
Steph was beautiful, but sometimes she was volatile and vindictive. Was I only with her because she was physically attractive? No, there had to be more. I mean, we had fun together, although those times were becoming fewer and farther between with our clashing schedules.
Would I even be sad if she moved out? It would be weird, but that was about all I came up with.
“Earth to Blake.” Ty was waving his hand in front of my face, trying to get my attention, and I swatted it away.
“What are you doing?”
“We’re here—at your house. Steph’s gone, so I was trying to get you out of my car because I need to meet David. But you had that thousand-yard stare, and I was afraid you were catatonic again. You didn’t get pulled back into a dream, did you?”
“Oh, no. Sorry. I guess I zoned out. I didn’t even realize we’d stopped.”
“I gathered. Hence, why I was trying to get your attention. Anywho, it looks like you’re in the clear. Do you need anything from me before I go?”
“No, I’ll be fine. When you get in the office, if anyone asks where I am, tell them I had an off-site meeting. I’m going to turn my phone off and sleep the rest of the day. After my much-needed shower, that is.”
“Babe, you don’t worry about a thing. I got you. And if I see Greg, you want me to accidentally, on purpose, trip him?”
I shook my head and laughed. “I love you.”
“I love you, too. I’ll try to keep my distance from him, but its fair game if he comes to me.” He quirked an eyebrow as if asking for permission, but I didn’t respond. “We’ll devise a plan later when you’re well-rested.”
I leaned in and hugged him. “Thanks. I hope you have fun with David. I’ll talk to you soon.”
“Oh, before I forget, do you want David and me to pick you up for the party? Or are you still going with Steph?”
“The ship with Steph has sailed. I’d love to ride with you guys. Besides, I need to vet David before the party starts.”
“Oh yeah. I keep forgetting you haven’t met him yet. You’re going to love him.” He smiled dreamily, and I was so happy for him.
“I’m excited to see what the rave is all about. I’ll call you after my hours of hopefully uninterrupted sleep. Later, baby boy.”
“Peace out, little momma.”He blew me a kiss as I left.
After heading inside, I went straight to the shower, shedding my shoes and clothes on the way. It was nice to have the house to myself. I wasn’t sure where Steph was, but I was glad I didn’t have to talk to her right now. I hopped into the shower and allowed the water to bombard me like scalding BBs, substituting the pain inside with physical discomfort.
Once I rinsed off all the negativity, I got out, put my PJs on, and brushed my teeth. I was like a new person, and I crawled between my Egyptian cotton sheets to hibernate. As soon as my head hit the pillow, I was gone?—
I would recognize this music anywhere. I’d heard it twice before when she called to me, and I was right back where we’d left off from last night. My hands rested on her hips, and this time, I drew her near, allowing her to melt into me. I throbbed all over, but it settled in my center. I was so drawn to her, and it was as if I no longer had free will.
I turned her around in my arms and finally saw her face-to-face. I was so disappointed that I didn’t recognize her. I didn’t find out anything useful. Why was this exquisite woman dominating my dreams?
As I studied her blue-gray eyes and crooked smile, my breath hitched, but I didn’t find any answers. My fingers traced the outline of a tattoo on her upper left arm—a puzzle piece with something written inside. The words appeared to be Italian. I touched every stroke and burned every color into my mind. I had to remember “ti trovero” because it seemed like a clue.
When I touched her, it was as if I was finally whole. I didn’t realize I was missing something until this moment. This didn’t appear to be a dream, but if it was, I didn’t want to wake up.
But I didn’t have a choice. Everything changed, and she was gone. I was no longer on a dance floor; instead, I was surrounded by stables and horses. When I stepped outside, chickens were clucking around, and cows were in the pasture. What was happening?
There was a tug on my heartstrings and she was here, but where? I didn’t have to wait long for that answer. A force stronger than myself urged me in the direction of a woman wearing a bonnet and gingham-style dress, feeding cats. It didn’t appear to be the same person from the club, but her expression was full of joy, and when I looked into her eyes, my heart fluttered. I didn’t understand why she looked so different, but it was definitely her. Her full lips and dimples were gone, but she still had that same heart-stopping smile.
I searched my body and noticed my naturally olive skin was now sun-kissed but paler. I touched my head, and I had a bonnet on as well. I ran my hands under the hat and my hair was straight and fine, nothing like my normal thick, curly mane. It wasn’t my body, but it was me—like her. She wasn’t the same, but her essence was. It was like I had known her my entire life. The desire to intertwine our fingers and run off into the sunset consumed me, but the fleeting moments slipped away, leaving only memories and longing behind.
The beautiful outdoors passed in a blur, and I was now in a four-poster bed with a canopy of curtains draped over the top. I scanned the room for clues and surmised I was in a very old house with rock walls. Was this a castle?
I stood up and walked to a vanity with a mirror. I hesitantly stepped toward it and almost screamed. My face was so not my face. I had porcelain skin, pale eyebrows, and red hair. The face reflected at me was unfamiliar, but my eyes were definitely mine. They were green, with the slightest bit of yellow toward the center.
I glanced at my outfit—a floor-length nightgown with long cotton sleeves but lace around the neck and wrists. It was something I’d expect to see in a period piece.
As I exited the room to find out more about the situation, I collided with someone in a silk corset-style dress with an embroidered hoop-style skirt. She wrapped her arms around me to keep me from falling, and there was an instant jolt. It pulsed through my body, and I locked eyes with her. Yes, it was her. Those icy-gray eyes stared straight into my soul, and there was no other word to describe it except—mesmerized.
She gave me an easy smile that made me weak-kneed and a little damp between my thighs. I wanted to say something—anything. But I stood there, mute. It was as if my legs were made of Play-Doh, and I’d collapse if she weren’t holding me up. I was putty in her hands to mold however she desired. She grasped me tighter, and I leaned into her, willing and ready to be hers. She opened her mouth, and I wondered if she was going to speak or kiss me. It didn’t matter which because I was ready for more?—
My eyes flew open, and there was a loss—she was gone. My heart pounded in my chest as if I had been running after her. I rolled over, and my shirt stuck to me. I was tangled in my sheets, and sweat covered my body. I needed another shower. Then I slid my hand down my pants, only to be met with a different kind of wetness.
“Holy hell. That was more than a dream.”
Guilt pooled inside me because of how strong my emotions for this person were. If I had any questions about Steph before, I didn’t anymore—this was the end. I couldn’t continue our relationship when every ounce of my body wanted to be with this other person. Even if she wasn’t real, my feelings were—and that was scary as hell.