Chapter 30
Lily
T yler came walking over to us. Ann-Marie regarded him with the same love I saw blasting through her eyes on her wedding day. The eye contact he made with her was so strong and compelling, I flushed from being in proximity. I remembered the harsh judgment I had passed on him before I allowed myself to be loved by good men.
After all she told me about the lengths he went through and how bummed he was that he wasn't able to help the guys out more in their search, I realized I owed him an apology. Even if he didn't know what I was apologizing for.
Before I could think about it, I stood up and caught everyone off guard when I wrapped him in a hug.
"Woah!" He stumbled with his arms open wide.
Over his shoulders, I caught sight of my men and their gazes were tense. I smiled at them. If they were jealous, they should have known better by now. My heart only beat for them. They were the only ones who made my skin buzz. In my eyes, no one else compared to my four men. Still, I released Ann-Marie's husband before she got the wrong idea as well.
"Thanks for your help." I stepped back. "I know I haven't been welcoming to you before." I gave Ann-Marie an apologetic glance. "But you stepped up and helped when you didn't have to. I think that's the character of a good man. And I'm happy Ann-Marie has you in her life."
"Thanks." He cleared his throat before joining the sofa next to his wife and taking hold of her hand.
"You know, you are allowed to accept a compliment." She grinned at him before mouthing, thank you.
"I did." Tyler smiled. "I said, thanks." He nodded awkwardly.
"I don't know why he's pretending to be shy." She waved off his discomfort and turned her attention back to me. "I have to say, for someone who has been through hell and back, you're glowing."
"Aw, thanks. You're sweet. The truth is I'm a wreck, but I'm lucky I have these guys in my corner. I don't know what I'd do without them." I smiled in their direction, but they were still tense, shooting darts at Tyler.
Surely that hug couldn't have caused them to get that worked up. But I guess they had no way of knowing for sure that I was committed to just them. After all, this was still new to us. Yes, a lot had happened in the past few days that had bonded us closer than ever, but we'd never actually established the boundaries of our relationship, you know, whether they'd sleep with anyone else, or I would.
I went from Eric to all of them without a second thought, why would they believe that it's not just them I want? That they're the only ones who will ever matter to me romantically? I hadn't been communicating with them. I'd been running from deep conversation as soon as possible, using their bodies to help me forget my hell.
"I can imagine." Ann-Marie quirked the side of her lips up at me, but her cheeks strained and her eyes went blank as if leaving the room for a few seconds.
Once, she had let something slip about her being kidnapped, but she didn't expound and I didn't press. I knew she'd been through other traumas with the men in her life as well, so I trusted that her imagination was pretty spot on.
"Hey." I reached out and touched her knee, bringing her back out of that place, even though I was still stuck in mine.
"Have you set up an appointment with a therapist already?" She reached out and placed her hand over mine.
Pulling my hand away, I wrapped my arms around my midsection. "Not yet."
"Have you spoken to anyone about it?" She asked.
"No. I wouldn't know what to say, anyway." I started shaking my foot.
It was like my mind was chasing my feet and all I wanted to do was get up and run out that door, but I couldn't because the assholes were still out there.
"Maybe you're right." I conceded as a chill ran down my spine.
Like a loud noise, the image of my father's face flashed in my head, fast, like the flashing lights of a siren and I shook my head to dissolve the picture.
Dropping my head in my hands, I groaned. "I need help."
"That's it." Ann-Marie moved from her seat on the sofa and knelt before me, pulling my hands from my face. "We're making an appointment at The Women's Shelter. It doesn't matter if you don't know what to say. You can sit in silence. You can speak only the words that come to you in the moment. I'll be right there with you. Hell, I gotta see a therapist, myself."
"About your kidnapping?" I swallowed. She tightened. "I didn't forget."
She turned to her husband and dropped her head before nodding. "Yeah. We both have some shit to work through."
"I'm sorry for bringing it up..." I started.
"Oh, quiet. I know why you did. You need to know that someone understands what you're going through." She reached up to rub my shoulder and I didn't know why, but my eyes stung and the tears came pouring down.
"What the hell did you say to her?" Ryan's voice boomed over my shoulder. He must have run over because he wasn't there a second ago.
"Relax," Tyler hissed.
"It's okay." I turned to look up at their scowls, still directed at Tyler. Seriously, this was not the time for jealousy. "I've just decided that maybe I should book in with a therapist as soon as possible."
Ryan's complexion dulled and he got a hold of himself again. "Oh. That's good news." He stroked my shoulder.
"I have a bunch of therapists, if you're interested," Ethan's hurried fingers tapped against his phone.
"It's okay. I can find my own therapist," I responded, watching him flinch and reeling in my defense. "But I'd love it if you guys came with me."
He nodded.
Ann-Marie looked between the men and me. She must have picked up on tension in my words and well, my once happy-go-lucky men were as stiff as logs.
"Are you going to be okay?" she asked, concern furrowing her brow.
Yes, they were acting strange, but I knew what would help them loosen up.
Grinning through the stuffiness of my tears, I gave her a hug. "I'll be fine."
We were accustomed to looking out for each other, but I couldn't help but laugh at her thinking that they would ever hurt me. I couldn't be naive, of course. But on the occasions where I'd seen Eric get angry, he'd controlled his need to lash out at my request.
His friends respected my boundaries just as much. When they faced off with my father in that house, and no one ended up with a bloody nose, I knew I'd found men I'd be able to trust with my life. It was the most impressive and sexy thing I'd seen, knowing that they had so much respect for me, they wouldn't act on their anger.
No man in my life had had that much self-control. Although, looking back, laying into my father might have done some good. If I'd allowed them to knock some sense into him, I'd have avoided that kidnapping. Or it would've made him angrier and more determined.
I found myself wishing someone would teach him a lesson, but quickly dismissed that. Because I had my father's anger in my veins and the thought of being anything like him was a fate worse than death. That's why I chose to handle things the way I did, not because I was a saint and a stickler for doing the right thing, but because being anything like that piece of shit revolted me. I was looking forward to being there when he was being judged though, and when they threw away the key. I'd take pleasure in that.
Ann-Marie leaned in, taking her voice down to a whisper. "Are you sure?"
"Yes." I nodded, returning her whisper with a smile. "Thank you for stopping by."
"I'm sorry it was such a short visit. I thought you'd rather be on your own, in your space, right now, but I selfishly just had to see you." She got up and I stood with her.
"I'll always want to see you." I hugged her. "Thanks for coming."
I caught the warning she gave the guys over my shoulder as we broke the hug and I grinned, waving her and Tyler goodbye before turning on my heels.
"So..." I crossed my arms over my breasts. "Do any of you want to tell me what that was about?"
"What?" Matt mimicked my stance.
"Oh, come on. You guys were staring daggers at Tyler all night." I gave them a pointed stare.
Eric scratched his head. "What? We were not."
"Ha!" I took slow steps toward them. "That's convincing."
"It was nothing," Ryan started. Ethan found the ground interesting all of a sudden.
"Look, it's okay if you were jealous, but I didn't mean anything by that hug. Seriously, I'm going through a tough time right now, the last thing I'm thinking about is other men." I sighed, dropping my arms in frustration.
"Jealous?" Ryan balked.
"Yes. That outburst was alarming. I was crying one minute and being frightened out of my wits' end the next. Honestly, couldn't you have saved that outburst?" I asked, trying to be understanding but growing indignant. "I need your support, not your insecurities."
His eyes dropped to my balled fists and his face slackened.
"You're right. I'm sorry. What was I thinking?" He swiped a hand over his face, but even as he moved in to hug me, his eyes were wide and his body was still as tense as wood.
Stroking his back and watching Ethan, Eric and Matt choose to shift their moods as if putting on a performance, I stiffened in his embrace.
"Unless that's not the reason why you were staring daggers at him?"
He rubbed my back, taking a deep breath that rocked my body. "Of course it is."
Kissing my cheek, he stroked my hair with one hand, the other still locked around me. I melted and softened into him. The hug persisted and I began to rub his back too.
"Are you sure? What's the matter?" I asked, suspicion molding into protectiveness as I held him.
"I think we're all still just afraid to lose you. And maybe that manifested itself through a show of jealousy," Matt said, walking toward us and giving me a kiss on the lips.
The kiss swept through my body like a wildfire. "You know that I'd never cheat on you, right? You don't ever have to worry about that. All of you, you're it for me. Nothing you do could ever make that untrue. I'm sorry if I made you doubt that."
Ryan groaned before pulling back to kiss me. His salty tears flavored my lips before he pulled away. "Where are you going?"
"I think I just need to lie down." He apologized. "Don't worry, I'll be okay. Besides, I don't want to be selfish. Matt and Ethan haven't gotten their time with you yet."
Still, I wasn't convinced. "Ryan..." I called after him.
"He'll be fine." Ethan pulled me toward him and just hugged me, with the same sort of desperation in it that Ryan did.
"Are you guys sure you're alright?" I asked.
"Yes. Don't worry about us. Focus on you." Matt moved in to offer comforting strokes across my back.
Eric moved in to press a kiss against my cheek. "Love you," he whispered. "But as Ryan said, we've been selfish. I'll leave you with Ethan and Matt."
With that he was gone, and Matt's fingers stroking my scalp and kissing my neck were giving me heat stroke. Ethan's strong body cloaking mine was everything.
"I'm sorry for snapping at you," I murmured when Ethan pulled away to cup my face.
"It's okay." He dipped to take my lips as Matt's hands moved over my hips.
"It's not," I groaned. "I value your opinion and your input."
Ethan's finger trailed down the side of my face, over my neck and shoulders. I doubted he was hearing a single word I was saying as he continued the trail over the curve of my breast. I gulped.
"And I want to open up to you. I will with time." I grabbed his face and forced his eyes to focus on me. "It'll just take time."
"I know." He nodded before kissing me again.
I couldn't help but think he was telling me to shut up and I wasn't even mad about it. I could have made a big deal about him dismissing my feelings, but I knew he wasn't. I didn't want to keep talking either as their touches and kisses wiped my mind clean of anything but lust.
Moaning into his lips, I squealed when Matt's hands gripped my ass. "I like the way these pajamas fit. They make your ass look amazing." He spoke of the light and clingy short shorts he bought for me.
"I agree. You did a good job picking these out," Ethan said, watching as my nipple pressed into the fabric. "Perfect without a bra."
Ethan bent his knees and sucked on my nipple through the soft material, nibbling on the swollen, tender flesh. Matt pulled my pajama bottoms all the way down to my ankles and I was panting as I stepped out of them.
Ethan's beard grazed my belly as he scrunched up the hem of my top and pulled it up to expose my skin. My straps fell down over my shoulders, the top was stretched out and my breasts poured over the top. I imagined myself as a vixen in one of those old romance novels being debauched, and I groaned with hunger.
From behind Matt finger fucked me and Ethan reached down to stroke my clit, all while they drove me senseless with their kisses. I was moaning and gripping onto Ethan's shoulders for dear life as I tightened around Matt's fingers. Ethan tugged at his sweatpants, pushing them over his hips and my knees buckled at the warmth of his strong manhood pressing up against my belly.
All my senses turned on as their pheromones fluttered into my lungs and my body reacted by rubbing my breasts against Ethan. I basked in the velvet of his skin, burying my nose into his neck. Clutching his shoulders, I screamed my release.
Matt let out something similar to a growl as he slapped my ass and shook it. The warmth of him pressed up against my back; he slithered his dick between my ass cheeks. Thank goodness Ethan picked me up, though, because my knees wobbled from the impact of the orgasms and the dizziness of their bodies sandwiching me, rubbing against me unrestrained and gluttonous.
"Wait, what if the nurse catches us?" I thought out loud.
I should have thought about that before my panties came off and I squealed as Matt fingerfucked the life out of me, but I couldn't form proper thoughts when either of them looked at me, much less touched me.
Ethan grinned, as if he was thinking the same thing, that it was too late to think about that now. I'd be so happy when we were living on our private island and we had even more space. He crashed his lips against mine, kneading my ass so hard he was stretching my pussy in the process. I panted, unable to ignore the hunger of my center. I guessed we were all too horned up to care. In fact, my pussy twitched and dripped at the thought of being caught.
Ethan carried me over to the massive sofa and fell backwards onto it, settling me on top of him. He didn't give me any warning, slipping into me. My pussy was sopping wet so he slid in without any problem at all, stretching me. At this point, my body was already familiar with the fatness and length of him and my walls sucked on his cock like candy; my insides got a sugar rush.
My brain was mush as I rubbed myself against him, grinding my clit into his pelvis, groaning at how deep his thickness was buried inside me, filling me up to the point of insanity. Fuck, I couldn't breathe, but that didn't stop me from licking my lips and opening my mouth when Matt leaned over the arm of the couch, moving his cock closer to my lips. The precum leaking from his pinkened tip looked delicious and I flattened my tongue, allowing him to slide himself along it, all the way to the back of my throat.
The tangy metal of him awakened my taste buds and my eyes rolled over in satisfaction. I let my mouth hang open for a while so he could fuck my throat. Below, Ethan swore, his cock growing harder inside me and even harder to ignore as he rammed himself up into me, pinching my nipples and sucking them, cussing as everything hit him at once. He fell back again, gasping and groaning my name.
Cupping Matt's balls, I closed my mouth over his length, grinding my hips again, in frustration at the lack of Ethan's railing. But as he took a moment to catch his breath, he let me take the lead. Soon my peak built from the friction of clit against pelvis, thick cock head against some fucking internal organ which I was sure wasn't safe, but didn't matter to me right then, and hard girth grinding against my vaginal walls, tugging against my stretched beyond limits pussy hole. I moaned against Matt, chasing my release, watching Matt lock those fucking darkened eyes of his on mine as he bit his lips and tensed his belly.
And I came, clawing at his abdomen, gasping around his length as Ethan chose that moment to pound me until the room went soundless as he exploded inside me.
"Fuck, Lily." He cried my name.
Swallowing a curse, Matt pulled his cock from my mouth and dipped to kiss me before picking me up off Ethan and throwing me over his shoulders. The shock of dangling over his slender frame delighted me and I giggled.
"Hmm." Matt spanked my ass resting against his face and kissed a cheek, jiggling it and burying his face in it as he did, while hauling me off to the bedroom. "I want you all to myself. I don't want any interruptions." He threw me onto the bed and as I bounced up and down, I couldn't help but laugh.
"So I was right about the jealousy?" I tittered, sweeping my hair out of my face and keeping my eyes on him as he spread my legs open.
"Can you blame me?" He leaned over to kiss me. "Look at you. Plus, I don't want to have to stop fucking you just because the nurse walked in." He grinned.
My stomach did one of those flipping things and my heart rate sped up even more, leaving me breathless at the sight of his smile as he slammed his cock inside me. He sighed, throwing his head back as he slipped and slid against Ethan's cum and my ever-flowing juices.
"Don't tell me you're thinking about the nurse while fucking me?" I teased.
"She is kind of hot." He panted, teasing back.
Now my jealousy rose to the surface. Some guys liked older women. I writhed against him reminding him that he couldn't get this anywhere else. His mouth fell open as if I was blowing his mind, riding his cock from beneath him. He must have read my mind, or I'd achieved my goal, because he breathed against my lips, "There will never be anyone else for me. And right here, in this moment, you're no one else's, but mine."
My belly quivered and it was like there was a current moving through it, tensing, warming and releasing all at once. He slammed further inside me and I cried out.
"Yes, Matt. Claim me. Fucking claim me." I howled at the desperate way he fucked me.
"Shit, Lily." He slams his hand over my mouth, shushing me in the process as he pounds my pussy and I scream into his hand, my belly and pussy exploding together.
He groaned, removing his hand and lowering his lips again, kissing me like there was no tomorrow. He was fucking putting in the work, slamming hips against me, crushing my clit with his pelvis, pushing himself as far up into me as I could manage. He sucked on my tongue, making my pussy flutter before letting me up to breathe.
I didn't need to breathe. I needed to...I didn't know what I needed.
Biting on his shoulder, I sucked on his skin and shut my eyes to enjoy the decadence that was Matt.
"Tell me you love me again, Lily." He breathed his demand against my neck.
My abdomen clenched and released with the butterflies popping off inside as I confessed all the ways I loved him, screaming it into his mouth, reveling in the way he turned to brick inside me, cumming and bringing me along with him.
He collapsed on top of me, rolled off, pulled me into his side, panting at the ceiling.
"What was that about?" I asked when I caught my breath, sighing against the squishiness of their cum inside me, and rubbing my cheek against his chest in contentment.
"You complaining?" He kissed the top of my head before hooking his finger under my chin and tipping my head back to look up at him.
His gaze made me blush and I caressed his stubble, raising my lips up to his. "Of course not."
Our kiss didn't break until I was hot and panting again, swinging my legs over his hips, grinding against his lap and enjoying a sexy make-out session with my man.
"Be careful, or you might start round two." He smiled, whispering into my lips and kneading my back.
"You say that like it's a bad thing." I grinned against his lips.
"If he's not up for the challenge, I am." Ethan's voice behind us made my pussy tighten and I looked over my shoulder to see him standing in the doorway. Before I could say anything, though, Matt turned my head back to him and pressed his forehead against mine.
"Promise that no matter what, you'll never leave me." He whispered.
"Of course not." I lowered my lips to his cheek, nuzzling his beard. Someone was in need of a little extra attention today. I wasn't mad at it. "I said I wouldn't, didn't I?" I reassured him with cuddles and kisses, until Ethan joined us on the bed. "I'll never leave any of you." I moved to the center, settling between them, my last thought being on Eric and Ryan's whereabouts as I drifted off to sleep.