Chapter 20
SLIP
THE PAST – OCTOBER – 9 MONTHS AGO.
I dashed up the steps to Maddy’s house and rang her doorbell. I wiped my clammy palms on the back of my jeans and scanned the street. No, I hadn’t been followed by the paparazzi. I’d circled the block three times to make sure.
After a few pounding heartbeats, Maddy opened the door.
“What are you doing here?” Anxiety and excitement flickered in her gorgeous eyes as she peered over my shoulder, no doubt checking for photographers, just like I’d done.
Being followed was now my norm, since the hype surrounding our tour had hit a frenzied level. The guys and I were met by a sea of fans and paparazzi at every promotional appearance we did. Our nine-month global tour kicked off in five weeks. It was scary and thrilling and mind-blowing that we’d sold out every show. But like always, something...no, things plural...had rattled our band to the core.
“I have to talk to you.” Too much haste skipped in my voice. “It’s urgent.”
“Quick. Come in.” She grabbed my hand, dragged me into her house, and shut the door behind me.
The second the latch locked, I caught her around the waist and kissed her. Nothing had ever tasted so sweet. I didn’t relent in exploring her mouth, teasing and taunting her tongue with mine. Not until a soft moan hummed in her throat.
I loved that just kissing her made her melt. Relax. Made everything alright. I just hoped the conversation we had to have wouldn’t backfire.
Resting my forehead against hers, I breathed her in. I’d spent the last two nights stealing only a couple of hours with Maddy, and had no plans to see her until her next visit. But after today’s tour meetings, things could change.
“Something’s come up. About the tour.”
“What? Is everything okay?” Worry quivered through her tone.
“That’s subject to you, Mads.”
Puzzlement washed over her beautiful face. “Okay. I’ve only got twenty minutes before I head to the airport.” Yep, back to Vancouver. More time apart. “Come say hi to Mom first, then we’ll talk.”
She took my hand and led me down the hallway. My nerves jumped and swirled into a frenzy. Tonight I could walk out of here a happy man or a broken piece of shit.
I hoped it wasn’t the latter.
Valerie sat in her big recliner, watching a wildlife documentary narrated by David Attenborough. I loved the outdoors but couldn’t watch any form of nature program on TV. I’d rather have my eyes stabbed with a million needles...just like my hip.
But I pasted on a warm smile, stepped over to her, and gave her a kiss on the cheek. “Hey, Valerie. How are you doing?”
“Not good today.” Redness rimmed her glassy eyes like she was stoned. Angry rashes blotched her face. Her chest heaved with every draw of air. I’d never seen her this bad. “This is an unexpected visit. Maddy’s about to head back to Vancouver.”
“Yeah, I know. I just need to see her for a few minutes.”
“Oh, a quickie, huh?” Valerie giggled then coughed. “You usually go at it for hours. You two may be upstairs, but sound travels in this house. I hear everything .”
“That’s so you know I’m taking good care of Mads in every possible way.” I winked at Maddy. “But that’s not why I’m here.” I really wasn’t, but...I wouldn’t say no if she was up for it. Shit. Focus. I had other pressing priorities.
A flirty smile crossed Maddy’s lips. She tilted her head toward the staircase. “Come on. Let’s go upstairs.”
In her bedroom, she shut the door behind us. My mind raced as I plonked down on the bed bench. Leaning forward, I rested my elbows on my knees and cracked my knuckles on one hand, then the other.
Maddy eased in beside me. She caught my wrist, drew it toward her, and clasped my fingers against her lap. “Slip? What’s going on?”
I couldn’t tell whose hands shook more—hers or mine. But everything was about to change.
Crap. Here went nothing. I swiveled toward her. “We have to tell everyone we’re together.”
She sucked in a breath, shut her eyes, and didn’t move.
So I blabbered on. “We have to. After Flint and Sutton were mobbed by fans outside our gig last week, and the paparazzi are following us more and more, and Cole now has his daughter with him, for safety purposes, we’ve been assigned full-time security. They’ll start shadowing us tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow?” she whispered.
“Yep. Today, a team went to my house to check the security systems. Then, I had a meeting at their office this afternoon. I had to provide them with info about who comes and goes from my home, where I go, and who I see on a regular basis. I put you on my list.”
“Okay.” Her voice was barely audible. “We’re friends. Nothing wrong with that.”
I chuckled. “Mads, friends don’t come over in the middle of the night and sneak out before sunrise.” We hadn’t always done that, but it’d happened often enough. “With security and the paparazzi following my every move, we can’t keep seeing each other in secret. I don’t want to hide anymore. We can’t.”
A groove pinched her eyebrows together. She stared across the room toward a low bookshelf. Tears glistened in her eyes as she drew in a shaky breath, pursed her lips, and nodded. “I’m just scared. This, what we have, is so good.”
“It is. I won’t ever deny that. But now we can be even better.” I swept her hair over her shoulder and rubbed the back of her head. “Once we go public, there’ll be a shit show in the media for a few days, but then...we can just be us. Hanging out with our friends will be easier. I won’t be obsessing like a madman to get you alone. We’ll be able to kiss and touch and hold hands like a normal couple. I can’t wait to do those things. Be yours outside our doors.”
“Is that what you really want?” She searched my face as if looking for any doubt. She wouldn’t find any.
“Yes. More than anything.” I trailed my fingertips down her jawline, then brushed the tip of her chin. “I’ve wanted to tell everyone for months, but we’ve both had things that caused delays. Now there are no more reasons to do that.”
She placed her trembling hand on my chest and fidgeted with my worn-out, white T-shirt. “What about the tour?”
My heart tripped a beat. Her ever-present worries were somewhat cute yet frustrating. They just made me more determined to prove how much I loved her. “I’ll come home to see you. You’re the only one I want to be with. Please trust me.” I covered her hand with mine and held it over my thudding heart. “I love you. More than I’d thought possible.”
A gorgeous smile inched across her lips. “I love you too. More than I should.”
“No, now we can love each other more.” I kissed her fingertips. Every time she said she loved me, my chest tripled in size. The first time she’d said those three words to me was the same night I’d told her how I felt at Hayley’s Bar...after we’d gotten home to her place and made love bare for the first time. Then she’d said it again in the morning when I made her come twice before I snuck home. She’d said it every time we’d been together since. There was always a slight hesitation in her voice, but I felt the same way. It was scary to fall for someone again. But I knew in the depths of my soul that this was right. “Mads, if you love me as much as I love you, nothing will come between us. Not ever. It’s time to be honest with everyone.”
Her lips quirked at one corner. “We were supposed to only ever have a bit of fun. Now look where we are.”
“Yeah...look where we are.” I could’ve stared at her all day. Every hour for the rest of my life. “We love each other. I feel you in my soul. What could be better than that?”
“Um...” She winced and giggled. “Being in the same country. Working in the same city. Seeing each other every day. Living together.”
“Okay.” I chuckled. “You got me. But who wants to be normal?”
“Me,” she whispered.
“We will. One day.” Yeah, that wouldn’t happen in a hurry...but I’d work on it.
“What will our friends think?” Concern lilted her tone. “About how we’ve lied to them?”
“They’ll be pissed and shocked.” I kept an upbeat tone. Considering Tia and Lewis already knew, I honestly didn’t think Cole, Sutton, and Flint would care. “But they’ll come ’round. They’ll just want us to be happy.”
She nodded as new worry etched her beautiful brow. “I’m afraid to burst our bubble.”
“Me too.” I swiped my thumb across her forehead, hoping to erase her doubts. “But I believe in us. We’ll handle anything that comes our way.”
“You sure?”
“I am.” I clasped her hand in mine. “And maybe, when all this mayhem dies down, we’ll have a long vacation on a gorgeous island somewhere, away from everything and everyone.”
“That sounds nice,” Maddy sighed. “We could drink cocktails and get massages . . .”
“And fuck for hours and hours.” I winked and she giggled, and the sun shone again in my world. “So with all that to look forward to . . . will you please officially be my girlfriend?”
Her eyes glinted with a combination of happiness and fear, like they so often did. I wanted to eliminate her concerns. I was determined to do that.
She softened her voice. “There’s so much you don’t know about me.”
I didn’t question that. We hadn’t spent much time together. But I looked forward to seeing where this went. “And there’s a ton of shit you don’t know about me. But you know enough to make the call, Mads.”
As she nodded a tiny fraction, she fidgeted with my fingers. “I never meant to fall in love with you...but I did. I’m terrified of being hurt and losing you.”
Scary thing was, I was too. I prayed she didn’t break my heart. But I would risk it for her. “So am I. But I’ll do my best to never hurt you. You won’t ever lose me. So is that a yes?”
A nervous smile spread across her lips, but then she leaned over and kissed me. “Yes. Yes...I’ll be your casual, dirty weekend, romantic rendezvous girlfriend.”
“So, my full-time, part-time lover?”
“Yes.”
“Fuck. Finally.” Laughing, I wrapped my arms around her and kissed her.
Best feeling ever.
No more hiding. No more secrets. Nothing could go wrong, right?