35. Liam
After receiving no answer to my last three knocks, I twist the knob to Emily’s room and enter inside. She’s sprawled over the top of her bed with a glazed stare pointed at her ceiling.
Anxiety fills my veins and I’m at her side in two strides.
“Emily?” I ask, pushing a strand of her out of her face. She blinks slowly before her eyes turn to mine.
God damnit. She can barely keep her eyes open.
I sit on her bed and pull her into my arms. Her head lulls lazily against my shoulder.
“What are you doing, Féileacán? ” I whisper and press a kiss on her forehead. She mutters under her breath, but I can’t make out the words.
My heart aches for her. She’s in so much pain and looking for an escape in places that are just going to kill her in the end.
Shifting, I pull my phone from my back pocket and send a text to Paige. She enters a moment later with a glass of water.
Tears well into her eyes when she sees the state of Emily.
“Don’t tell Declan. I got her.” I say quietly and take the glass from her outstretched hand.
“Stay with her tonight.” She says softly and I meet her eyes.
“Thank you, Paige. Really.”
She steps closer and sets her hand on Emily’s shoulder. She gives it a light squeeze before making her way out of the room.
“Baby, I need you to try and drink this.” I peer down at Emily who watches me with her heavy gaze. “Can you do that for me?” I ask and she nods slowly.
Reaching over, I set the glass on her nightstand before adjusting our position, so she is sitting between my legs with her back against my chest.
Taking the glass, I raise it to her lips. Sluggishly, she leans forward, and I wrap my free arm around her torso to support her weight.
She groans as she drinks the ice-cold water. When she falls back against me, I place the glass back on the nightstand. I caress her arm with my fingers as I lean against the headboard. Her body is lax, and her breaths are slow.
What the hell did she take?
I search the room from where I sit but can’t find the pills, I know she has. I’ll have to wait until she’s asleep to find them.
She hums and I pull her closer to me.
“I’m here, Emily. You’re not alone anymore. You don’t need to keep doing this.” I struggle to swallow the lump in my throat.
I plant another kiss against her hair and breathe her scent in.
When her body relaxes further, I know she’s fallen asleep. I gently shift to set her down on the bed. She rubs her face against my side and breathes in deeply. She hums and I swear a smile tries to spread over her face before disappearing.
My eyes roam over her face. Her cheeks have started filling out, but her skin is still pale from lack of sunlight.
Lightly, I brush my finger along the bridge of her nose. Warmth spreads over me as I trace the freckles that paint her skin. Her lashes are still as long as I remember. They flutter as her eyes move rapidly behind her eyelids.
Releasing a deep breath, I push off the bed and begin my search for her medications. I find them in a basket under the bathroom sink. Pulling it out, I set it on top of the counter and begin rifling through it. I don’t know what any of these medications are for, so I search each of them up on the internet.
Antipsychotics.
Muscle relaxers.
Antidepressants.
A variety of eye drops.
The number of medications in this basket seems endless and my heart breaks the more of them that I discover.
Shite.
I grip the edge of the counter until my knuckles whiten and close my eyes. My limbs tremble and I fight to contain the emotional pain and grief that fill my system. I need to do something. But what? What could I possibly do for Emily to see that she doesn’t need to rely on medication to survive?
When I go to place the basket back under the sink, I find a small box that seems out of place. I reach over and pick it up. It’s light and I assume it might be empty, so I go to put it back. It slips from my grasp and falls. Loose tablets and capsules of unknown medications spill across the tiled floor.
What the fuck?
Some of these look like the ones in the bottles, others don’t and it sends a wave of unease through my body.
Where in the fuck did she get these?
I pull my phone from my pocket and snap some photos of the medications before cleaning up and putting everything away. Striding back into the room, Emily lies in the same position as I left her.
I walk to the side of the bed that is closest to the door. Slipping off my boots, I take off my pants and tee before sliding into bed. Lying on my back, I tuck my arm under my head and drape the other over my stomach. My thoughts are in disarray with everything I’ve learned today.
Emily’s phone pings and I move to check the screen.
Ma:
I love you, Emily. Please don’t push me away. Call me back.
Furrowing my brows, I peer at Emily over my shoulder.
Emily has always been close with Caetlin. Why would she be pushing her away?
I set her phone back on the nightstand and lay back down. After spending hours staring at the ceiling trying to figure out what to do, I finally drift off to sleep.