57. Liam
The days' following Emily’s release from the hospital have had an odd sense of calmness. I panicked when I stepped into her room and saw her sobbing uncontrollably in her bed. She ended up falling asleep in my arms from exhaustion and I sat for hours stroking her hair until the doctor came in and said she was cleared to go home.
On the drive home, she shared that she was visited by multiple women she had seen during her time in captivity.
My emotions were all over the place when she explained how they shared the peace they found and the encouragement her spirit felt to keep going. To keep fighting.
She still has such a long road ahead of her and her addiction will always be something to work at, but I have all the faith in the world that she will make it through this.
It’s late in the evening when Emily and I finally come home. We had spent the entire day in the garden. We fell asleep under the shade of the trees after we had lunch, and it was absolutely amazing.
Emily steps out of the ensuite with a towel wrapped around her. Her red hair sits on the top of her head in a large messy bun.
I lie in bed and watch her go through her nightly ritual. We’ve settled into a comfortable routine. Declan has made it a point to have her things checked periodically for any hidden drugs. I don’t entirely approve of this method, but I understand his reasoning so, for now, I’m allowing it.
Once she’s finished, Emily comes to bed and lays her head on my chest. My fingers lightly caress the skin on her arm and goosebumps rise. Over the last few nights, we’ve been working on her fear of having the lights off when she sleeps.
Reaching over, I switch off the lamp on my nightstand. Emily tenses but remains in my arms. I softly play with the ends of her damp hair.
“You alright?” I whisper into the dark room.
Her head dips in a small nod but she remains silent. Her body shivers with tension and I wrap my arm tightly around her, pressing her against my body.
I keep my breaths even and feel her mimic them. Her body steadily begins to relax.
“Are you ready to turn your light off?” I ask and she tenses again. “I’m right here, Féileacán. You’re not alone.” I whisper, pressing a kiss on her head and stroking her hair.
Tentatively, she pulls away and leans over to shut her light off. When the room is cast into darkness with only the soft glow of the moon shining through the window, Emily burrows herself into my side.
Her shivers become trembles and her breathing shallows. Rubbing my hand up and down her arm, I whisper soothing and encouraging words until I feel the stiffness in her muscles dwindle.
“Talk to me, mo ghrá.”
“About what?” she asks softly.
I shrug. “Anything. Everything. It will help clear your mind and help distract you.”
We move into a comfortable conversation until sleep eventually takes Emily. Her soft snores fill the silence in the room and a content sigh escapes my lips.
Her scent billows around me and I breathe as much of it in as humanly possible.
I’m not sure how long I lay staring up at the darkened ceiling soaking in the warmth of Emily’s presence until I finally drift off to sleep.
I wake up to Emily’s soft whimpers. Peering down, her face is twisted in pain, and she kicks her feet as though she’s running.
“Em?” I whisper, pulling my body away from her.
A thin layer of sweat coats her forehead and a few strands of her hair stick to her skin, and small pants burst through her slightly ajar lips.
I push the sweaty strands away from her face and she begins to wake. Her eyes flutter open and gradually focus on my face.
“Everythin’ okay?”
I know it’s a stupid fecking question because, clearly, it’s not but I don’t know what else to say at this hour of the night.
She blinks her fatigue away and then rises onto her elbow.
“Do you think we can go for a walk?” she whispers.
“We can do anything you want, Emily.”
The two of us quickly put on our shoes and Emily grabs a mustard-colored cardigan.
We walk hand-in-hand along one of the many paths that cut through the property. The moonlight silhouettes the many guards that patrol the estate. I dip my chin and Emily smiles at each one we pass.
“I still hear them.” She whispers, keeping her eyes trained forward.
“Who?”
She slows to a stop, and I turn to face her. She studies my face with slightly pinched brows and gives me a forced smile.
“Their cries.” She scoffs humorlessly. “Despite seeing them and knowing they’re at peace, their cries echo in my head like a broken record.”
My eyes soften and I softly caress her cheek with the back of my fingers. She leans into my touch and smiles sadly.
“Do you think they’ll ever go away?” her voice is so quiet; I nearly miss her question.
I gently shake my head. “I don’t know, Em. I really don’t.”
She nods and nibbles on her bottom lip. Lifting my hand, I use my thumb to pull it from her teeth.
“What if they never stop?”
“We’ll figure it out. Together.” I stare into her eyes so she can see the sincerity in those words.
She starts to shake her head, but I grip the back of her neck and pull her forehead to mine.
“Look at me, Em,” I say when she closes her eyes.
They pinch tighter and I give her neck a reassuring squeeze.
“Look at me.” I demand softly and she finally opens her eyes. The blue in them is so deep from the tears that have started to fill her eyes but she keeps her gaze on mine.
“I’m not going anywhere, Emily. Not this time. Not ever.”
“What if it becomes too much? What if you realize that I’m no longer worth the trouble?” Her lip quivers.
I wrap my fingers around her hand and bring it to my chest, right above my heart.
“You feel that?” I whisper, caressing her skin with my thumb. She nods, staring at our hands. “I belong to you, Féileacán . There is no force strong enough that will ever make me walk away.”
The moonlight dances across her face when she peers at me through her lashes. The glow casts a halo around her, causing my heart to thump rapidly in my chest.
Her fingers twitch when she feels the change in my heartbeat.
“I love you, Féileacán.”
She swallows and clears her throat. “I love you too, Liam.”