CHAPTER 26
“What are you thinking?” I tapped the space between his brows with my pointer finger. “Are you in another universe?”
Mikey’s eyes have been digging a hole through the ceiling for the past half hour. He’s been withdrawn for the past couple of days—he’s been like that since that day we had lunch at Emmie’s.
I had no idea what was going on inside his head.
“Yeah.” He slid me a small smile. “I was on planet X74, and there were 74 cosplay versions of Lily worshipping me.”
I rolled my eyes. “Oh, please stop with your BS. Now tell me what’s really wrong?”
“Nothing.” He averted his gaze back to the view that he was acquainted with. “I’m fine.”
I sighed, separating my body from his and rising to my feet as I headed to the bathroom.
He didn’t even look up as I left. I guess he was far gone, wherever he was.
I made sure to lock my bathroom first before I crouched down to the cabinet to retrieve the tray of pills that I had kept hidden behind my tampons.
I counted about seven of those tiny white pills that were keeping me alive and swallowed, washing them away with a glass of water from the tap.
I blinked at the dark circles starting to show under my eyes and the hollow of my cheekbones protruding from my normally full cheeks.
A familiar scratchy lump made its way up my throat. Without wasting a minute, I quickly ran the tap to mask the sound of the cough that jarred my bones. I could feel the impact of its force down my skull.
Fuck.
I rubbed my chest, leaning over the counter as I heaved it out of me. A bitter taste of copper stung my tongue.
What the fuck?
Confused, I extracted my hands, which were now tinged in a shade of crimson.
Fear rooted me still. Till now, I’d been avoidant, nonchalant, and accepting.
The reality was a lot more terrifying.
What was I thinking when I decided that I was okay with this?
A minute later, my wracking cough finally subsided, and I quieted my mind as I willed deep breaths down my lungs.
I stared at my weary self in the mirror, wiping away the tinge of blood from the corner of my mouth.
This was it, wasn’t it? This was how you slowly died.
I squeezed my eyes shut and buried my thoughts as I shot off a quick text to Dr. Karlfield to make an appointment before I exited the bathroom .
“Was waiting for you.” Mikey had shifted from his gloomy position to his side, with one hand propping his head while his other held a familiar piece of paper.
“Why?” I frowned, making my way to him. My mind still swirled in a blackened gloom.
“Because I found this.” He grinned, waving the paper toward me.
It took me a moment to focus on him and the oddly familiar paper in his hand, and it dawned on me. Fuck, it was my wish list.
“Don’t you dare read that, Michael.” I hurried toward his side, but he bolted off the bed as he read aloud.
“Lily’s wish list.”
“Give that to me!” I shouted, too tired to chase him.
“1- Have my name credited as an animator in a show, 2- Go to Coney Island, 3- Color my hair purple, 4- Fuck someone at least once, 5- Go to Japan…”
I snatched the paper from his hand before he could read the last one. “You have no right to sneak around my personal stuff, Michael.” I pushed his chest, a wave of fury bursting out of my pores.
“Whoa.” His eyes widened. “I wasn’t snooping. I was looking to see if you had some aspirin for my headache.”
I exhaled through my clenched teeth. “If the aspirin wasn’t there, you should’ve respectfully closed the drawer and asked me when I came back.”
I wasn’t sure why, but I was feeling more irritated than usual. Maybe it was the embarrassment that he had read something intimate to me, or it was internal panic that he was too close to finding out the truth laced with my lingering fears.
My eyes darted to the open drawer where I had all my medical files stuffed behind my notebooks.
“Hey.” He approached closer, peering at me with wide eyes. “I thought there were no secrets between us, little mouse. You’re my girl now, and I want to know everything about you. And it’s just a list.”
That only made my vision blind with rage. “That’s rich, coming from you. No secrets, huh? You won’t even tell me why you abandoned our friendship eight years ago, Michael, so you’ve got no right, okay? And it may just look like some list to you, but it’s everything to me, and I didn’t want you to see it.” My heart thudded as I finished.
“Fine. I’m sorry I pried.” A vacant look covered his eyes as he stood still before scrubbing a hand over his head and walking away to the front room.
My heavy breathing filled the room as I calmed myself down. Sinking down on the bed, I buried my head between my knees.
My head was all over the place. One second, I was ecstatic, and the next, I was annoyed and downright frustrated.
A ping on my phone confirmed my appointment for tomorrow. I hesitated for a moment before texting the one person who could help me.
I tossed my phone aside and lay back on the mattress, my heart pounding in a frenzy, unable to calm myself.
It was hard to navigate feelings like this. I was never the one to deal with overwhelming emotions, and I always put them aside. Now I was compelled to compartmentalize them, and I was lost.
I didn’t know how long passed since I sank into this never-ending hole of thoughts when I felt a presence beside me.
My eyes flew open and landed on the shirtless enigma lying on his side, gazing straight down at my eyes.
“You seem to be thinking hard.”
I shook my head. “I was just… I don’t know. A lot is going on in my mind.”
He sighed, twirling a strand of my violet hair in his finger. “Why don’t you start freelancing again? The boys and I will start working on the album in a couple of weeks, and I’ll have my hands full with that. It will keep you preoccupied. I think you’ll like starting back on it again. I haven’t seen you touch your sketch pad in days.”
“It’s not that, Michael.”
“Then just wait for a while till this Grisha thing gets sorted for you, and then you’ll have your job back.”
“I told you it’s not that.”
“Fine.” He exhaled, darting his gaze away. “I’ll go sleep at mine tonight,” he muttered, sliding off my bed.
Some form of guilt swam in my gut, so I didn’t think when I hoisted myself and clamped my arms around his neck and swept his lips in a hungry kiss, which had him gasping into my mouth.
There, that would distract me from my deadly thoughts.
My lungs screamed for air, and my vision was blinded, but I didn’t care. His smell and his taste surged my blood, electrifying my heart. And I didn’t ever want to let go .
“Damn, little mouse,” he muttered, his lips leaving mine swollen and red as he traced his lips over the curve of my jaw.
My eyes fluttered closed. The warmth of his bare skin weighed me down and made my core tingle with wetness.
His tongue dragged over the side of my neck while his hand roughed its way under my hoodie, pinching my nipples and almost pulling them off my breast, emitting a low groan from me.
Fuck, I wanted him now.
I hooked my leg behind his hips, shoving his hardness closer to my throbbing clit behind the thin layer of my panties.
My hips raised to grind against him, but suddenly, he retreated, pulling all the way over to the edge of the bed.
“What are you doing?” I muttered through my heavy breathing.
His tongue darted out and licked his bottom lip. My eyes followed the move, wanting that tongue on me instead. “We’re going to play a game.”
“What game?” I frowned, my body high with hormones.
“A game where you do everything I ask you to. Now do you want me?”
“Yes,” I whispered.
“Then get naked.”
“What?” My eyes widened.
“Get naked if you want my cock to rail you good, Liliana.”
Fuck. Me.
My heart beat in an erratic rhythm, so loud that I could almost hear it jump out of my rib cage .
I nodded, slowly dragging my hoodie away from my body.
My breath hitched, and my throat worked a swallow as I sat before him, topless. His pupils darkened as his eyes drew straight to the pink tips, standing straight for his attention.
“Good, now the rest.”
I bit my lip as my fingers found the band of my panties and peeled them off my dripping pussy.
“Give it to me,” he commanded.
I threw it his way, and he caught it with the precision of a catcher while his gaze never wavered from mine.
“Now show me where you want my cock.”
A screaming blush prickled my cheeks. I inhaled a deep breath as I pointed my finger between my thighs.
He shook his head. “Show me.”
“But Michael,” I uttered in a gasp.
“You either show me, or I leave, Lily.”
Inch by inch, I slowly spread my feet farther till my hips would allow me, my feet flat on the bed.
“Dip one finger in.” His expression gave nothing away.
His green eyes were dark, full of depraved desire as they watched me.
I brought one finger down my drenched folds, trailing it over my clit.
“Stop.” His voice made my hand still midair, and I looked up at him. “Not there, straight to your pussy. Dip one finger inside, just the tip.”
I nodded. I didn’t even think my brain was functioning at this point. I glided my pointer finger lower and plunged it into my walls, which immediately clenched from the pressure. But it wasn’t enough. It was a craving for something more, something bigger, something warmer.
“Enough, pull it out.”
I uncurled my finger away from my pussy.
“I want a taste. Feed it to me.”
I leaned over on all fours, my eyes on him the whole time as I lifted the finger up to his lips. He sucked my finger into his mouth, swirling his tongue over every single drop of that wetness, giving a sharp bite as he let go.
“Now go and wear the shortest violet skirt you have.”
His request took me aback as I gaped, staring dead straight into his eyes. “What?”
He gave me a sharp look. “I told you, Lily, the moment you stop listening is the moment I leave.”
“Fine.” I tangled myself out of bed and hurried to my closet.
I was pretty sure my entire body was red because of the way it was burning.
“Just the skirt, Lily. Don’t take too long,” he called out.
Fuck, I calmed some of my wheezing breath as my shaky hands dug inside my closet to find an appropriate skirt.
Why the fuck did he want me to wear it? Where was he going with this?
Found it, my fingers skid over the soft fabric of my ruffled skirt as I pulled it over my hips.
The cold air of the bedroom pebbled my already stiff nipples, feeling the sickness between my thighs as I made my way out.
He had shifted his position toward me, feet on the floor as he sat on the edge of the bed .
This was officially the most embarrassing and the hottest thing I’d ever done in my entire life.
“Come here,” he muttered.
I had no idea how my brain made my feet move, but they moved toward him. My entire world was buzzing. It felt like I was in a heavy daze being controlled by him.
“Hmm.” He lazily ran a finger along my collarbone. “I think I should feed you more. You’ve lost weight.” His eyes were straight in line with my lower belly at this position.
“Lift your skirt.”
My trembling fingers got hold of the hem of the skirt and yanked it up.
“Higher.”
I raised it higher. The waistband was almost right under my breasts.
“Perfect.” He bent lower and ran his nose along my hips dropping lower to cleft of my pussy, dragging his tongue along the length and gathering my juices into his mouth. “Made for me.”
I was hyperventilating at this point, trying hard to keep my hands on my skirt.
He leaned back on his arms, bringing me closer.
His glowing greens held my glassed violets. “Keep your hands right where they are, and don’t move an inch, okay?”
“Okay,” I rasped.
His head lowered and swept between my thighs, his tongue forking straight into my pussy.
I screamed, my back bowing and my body a quivering mess while I trained every molecule in me to stay in position .
His tongue fucked me hard, alternating between lapping my clit and exploring my walls.
I didn’t even last mere seconds before I came, the rush spinning my head.
“Mikey.” I shuddered into a complete mess. My toes curled as my limbs gave way.
He caught me in his arms, crashing my body to his as I came down from the high.
My loose body draped over his, my cheeks resting on the hollow of his neck as I tried to catch my breath, which was nonexistent at this point.
“Hey,” he whispered. His hand swept away the wet strands of hair sticking to my face. The cool, commanding gaze in his eyes softened. “You okay?”
Exhaustion weighed on me. “Yes,” I muttered before breaking into a chuckle. “Guess this is what quitting swimming for two months gets you.”
He gently laid me on the bed and removed the skirts that were ruched up, digging into my back.
“Looks like you need this.” He hoisted my head onto his lap and fed me an entire can of water. The fresh, cold water immediately soothed the fire in my chest.
He threw it aside and gathered me in his arms, throwing a light blanket over us as he switched off the lights.
“Are you okay?” he asked, just as my eyelashes touched the tops of my cheeks.
“Yes.” I forced my eyes open, bringing my gaze to him, cuddling closer. It was only then I felt his hard mass poking my thigh. “What about you? ”
He smiled, pressing a soft kiss on my nose. “Don’t worry about me. Sleep now.”
I nodded, setting my cheek on his chest.
“Are you still holding a grudge that I read your list?”
A smile curved my lips. “No, I don’t remember it happening.”
“Good, ’cause my ego soared helping you tick off number four, but it was pretty tame. I say we make a dirtier one.”
“Ass,” I mumbled, laughing as I fell asleep, thinking he never kept his promise to fuck me.