Chapter 20 Nox
Nox
Our group ascended the small hill on the outskirts of the training grounds.
With my Shifter eyesight, I spied cobblestone paths leading to a village, rocky paddocks with sheep, goats, and cattle, and right in the center lay a patchwork of bright, flickering bonfires.
There were hundreds of people flocking to them, with all sorts of instruments blaring as the Noctus Vigil began.
Thecae and Devora led the way, while Everett and Arowyn stood at my side. Most of the other trainers and trainees had gone on ahead. The five of us quickly reached the top of the incline and made our way to the center of the town square.
Shadows from the nearby mountain ranges cloaked the town, but the full moon and lit torches carved a pale path through them.
The stars twinkled above us without a single cloud to block the sky.
The low hum of insects and night creatures, the rhythm of pounding drums, and the whispers of so many Shadow Wielders floated around me like music.
I couldn’t help but glance at Devora. She’d taken her hair out of the bun, letting it flow in waves down her back. When she turned to look at us, her eyes sparkled beneath her glasses, her cheeks pink and lips parted in wonder.
My gaze was glued to her. I hadn’t seen her like this before. She seemed…happy. Or at least, verging on something that could make her happy. Something like hope.
I hated the word she so often used. Prisoner. But the longer I saw her outside of the confines of that tower, the more I realized what I’d done to her. How I’d treated her.
She deserved it, a voice in the back of my mind kept saying. Rissa is your friend, and she betrayed her. We’ve done much worse to traitors before.
That reasoning was beginning to hold less and less power over me, now that I’d seen how willing Devora was to help us.
That outrage, that grudge, that hatred of disloyalty…
it was an innate part of my Shifter half.
It was still there, churning and searching for an outlet.
But it was slowly turning into something else.
Shame.
“It was the only piece of my past I ever had.” The blanket Devora’s parents had left for her, the single possession she had linking her to her family.
It was funny how such a small item held such great significance.
And I’d taken it from her. I hadn’t even thought to let her gather her things when I swept her out of Mysthelm.
I’d been so focused on what she’d done, so angry with her for hurting my friend.
I remembered when I’d been taken from my home. We were still mourning our father’s death when Scarven’s men burst into our seaside cottage and snatched my mother, sister, and me away.
Like Devora, I was taken with the clothes on my back and nothing more. No keepsake from my childhood, no favorite toy, nothing to remember my father by.
I scrubbed a hand down my face and finally ripped my eyes from Devora as we approached the rows of bonfires. I refused to be anything like Kane Scarven. Yet sometimes…sometimes I wondered if we had more in common than a shared father.
“The rituals are beginning,” Thecae whispered, nodding toward the largest of the fires where a group had gathered. “They’ll read the names of those who have died since the last full moon, and then families of the deceased will burn their tokens.”
“And then what?” Devora whispered back.
Thecae flashed her a smirk. “And then we celebrate. These lives are not to be mourned. They’re to be remembered.”
Someone stood on a raised platform in front of the center fire with a scroll in his hands. A hush fell over the crowd. He cleared his throat, and the drumroll started again, quieter this time.
“Finnian Alabar.” There was no introduction, merely names spoken in his reverent tone, with the rumble of drums as a backdrop. “Wynn Calestro. Loren Davros.”
On and on the list went, and each time a new one was said, a cloud of shadows formed above the bonfire in the shape of their silhouette.
The families of the deceased stepped forward, one by one, to burn their offerings in the flames.
Some tokens were too small to see, while I could tell others were pieces of jewelry, letters, or books.
The fire crackled louder with every item, emitting sparks and bursts of smoke.
When the list came to an end, the people all murmured as one, “You are not forgotten.”
Hundreds of whispers washed over the space like rolling thunder. The drums fell silent. A long horn answered from somewhere behind us, and the crowd exhaled.
Silence.
And then—
The musicians started up in full swing. The Shadow Wielders around us burst into applause, separating into groups with hollers of excitement. Some called out names in greeting, while others broke out bottles of wine.
The atmosphere instantly shifted from melancholy reverence to raucous nightlife.
My lips curved into a grin. Now that was something I could get behind.
“Are you smiling?”
I jerked my head to the sound of Devora’s voice and found her raising an eyebrow at me.
“Oh, Nox loves his parties,” Arowyn drawled to my right.
Devora’s eyebrows inched higher and higher up her forehead, as if she couldn’t possibly believe I could have fun. I liked a little challenge, and this woman constantly asked for one.
“Arowyn, darling, remember the night last year at the capital when we snuck that bottle of Luxe?” I grinned at the Strider.
Arowyn snorted. “There are young minds present, Nox.” She nodded toward Everett and Devora, who rolled her eyes.
My stare lingered on her. I sometimes forgot how young she was. Twenty-three—ten years younger than me. Only a couple of years older than my sister.
But there was nothing sisterly in the way I found my thoughts straying to that smart mouth of hers.
I quickly looked away. A passing Shadow Wielder held out a half-drunk bottle of something that smelled like raspberries, and I snatched it.
“Feel like sharing?” Everett’s deep voice asked behind me.
I held the sweet drink out to him. “After you.”
I hadn’t spent much one-on-one time with the Illusionist since we rescued him from Scarven three years ago. He’d been a wonderful asset ever since then, especially with the children. His illusions and ability to dreamwalk soothed them.
Everett Swift wasn’t a particularly outgoing fellow—mostly stoic and pensive, with occasional spouts of dry humor that had me laughing out loud.
But he was compassionate, in his quiet way.
When the children had nightmares, he always seemed to know.
He was at their side in an instant, drawing on his illusions to craft visions of warmth and comfort in their little minds. He was a natural.
And fiercely determined. Something crouched behind those mismatched gray and green eyes, something desperate and longing.
He was the only other one in our Order besides me who knew the pain, loneliness, and despair of those cells.
After so many years as part of Scarven’s experiments, he had a vendetta.
A personal obligation I could see burning inside that closed-off exterior.
I could work with that.
We walked in silence to get away from the busiest area of the square. Arowyn and Devora had ventured to one of the bonfires still in my line of sight. I watched as Thecae introduced her to a couple of people, and she shook their hands with a smile.
People all around were dancing, cloaks and skirts swirling across the ground to so many different tunes that it made it difficult to concentrate.
Shadows seeped from their feet and billowed up into the sky.
To my left, one man grabbed a large stick and lit it in the nearest bonfire, then slowly lowered the flame down his throat to the cheers of many bystanders.
He took a deep breath and let it out, and a cloud of shadows burst from his lips.
“You know,” Everett said, “there was this girl I knew. Down in the cells.” He paused, and I didn’t risk looking at him and ruining this rare moment of openness. “I think she’d like this.”
I hummed, absentmindedly watching as Devora twirled around a campfire. Her body moved like smoke, so natural and carefree. “Were you close?” I asked Everett, forcing my attention back to him.
“You know how it is.” He cleared his throat and took another drink.
The movement caused his tunic to shift, revealing the very tip of a black-inked design on his dark chest. “Nothing and nobody last long. We didn’t even tell each other our names.
It would’ve made the cells feel too…permanent.
” He paused, a far-off expression on his face.
“But yeah. We were close. It was…it was real. As real as it could be.”
I nodded in understanding. Down there, you had to keep things at arm’s-length. It was the only way to protect your mind from giving in to the darkness completely.
“I had someone like that,” I offered after a moment. “Her name was Sage. We planned to run off together, after everything.”
“What happened?”
Grabbing the bottle from him, I took a long swig. “We did. Run away together, that is. But we were caught.” I rolled my neck on my shoulders to look at the sky. “She didn’t make it.”
“I’m sorry, Nox.”
A moment passed, then I asked, “What about your girl?”
At first, I didn’t think he was going to respond. He crossed his arms over his chest, staring into the distant mountains. Finally, he said, “She’s still down there.”
My spine straightened. “What? Why haven’t you said anything? We could try to get her out, Everett.”
He shook his head. “I look for her. Every time we go back. But he must have moved her. I haven’t been able to find her again.” His voice trailed off as he took the bottle and drained it. “I promised her I’d come back for her. We were young, but…I promised.”
We went silent after that. I was sure we were both thinking the same thing—if he hadn’t been able to find her, she was probably gone.
But I knew better than anyone what that kind of hope felt like, and Fates help me if I was going to be the one to take it away from him.
I found Devora again. She threw her head back and laughed at something Arowyn said, then turned to lock eyes with me. Her smile fell, but it still lingered on the edges of her eyes, and she tipped her chin toward me.
“I’ll help you keep that promise,” I said to Everett, my gaze still on her. I blinked and shifted back to him, remembering my other motive for coming here. “But there’s actually something else I wanted to talk to you about.”
“Oh?”
“The real reason I asked you to come with us.” I clapped him on the back when he raised an eyebrow. “I need a favor.”