CHAPTER 22
“You wear less pink. In fact, nothing in this apartment is pink except for that one coffee mug.”
It’d been a week since Jay showed up at my apartment asking to be friends, and we were, somewhat friends. Somehow, everything we did seemed like we were more than just friends, but we’d kept our hands off each other and kept things platonic.
So it was safe to say that we were now friends. Strictly just friends.
“Yeah, it’s still my favorite color, but I avoid it. It reminds me of you,” I admitted honestly.
He nodded like he understood and went back to his guitar.
And I went back to my writing.
Was it like a replay of our past? Yes. But did I care? No.
Because it was something we both loved to do so I didn’t question when he showed up at my place with his bright red acoustic. In fact, it elated my heart.
“You daydream a lot less too.” His hand was still scribbling on the paper as he asked.
I looked up from that one sentence that was bugging me no matter how I worded it. “Duh, obviously, trust me Evy’s wonderland of cotton candies is now a long-lost dream.”
He chuckled. “Why? What’s wrong with Evy’s wonderland of cotton candies?”
I leaned back, stretching out. “Well, life taught me it wasn’t a substantial dream anymore.”
“Why? It could still be possible.”
“Trust me, with the condition that my body is in today, my weary bones will be filled with diabetes from that stupid daydream.”
“It wasn’t stupid.” He shrugged. “I thought it was cute.”
I was pretty sure two pink splotches covered my cheeks. “Yeah, only to you,” I muttered under my breath.
“Any luck with the job search?” His fingers glided across my toes, kneading them.
“No,” I groaned. “I’ve applied to like thirty positions but still no luck. I swear, though, if Amelie bitches about Theo’s hairstyle one more time, I’m gonna punch her in the face. I mean, he’s a five-year-old with curly hair. No matter how much I tame it, it’s all over the place by the end of school.”
He sighed loudly. “I told you I could talk to some people and get you a good position.”
“No,” I said quickly. “I wanna do this on my own, Jay.”
“I know, Evy.” He massaged the pain in my feet harder. “But sometimes you need to put aside your ego and ask for help. I’m just going to be connecting you to the right people, but the work you do will be all you. It could help you build a profile and gain the experience.”
I thought about what he said for a moment and acknowledged that he was right. I had no qualifications or experience in this field, although writing was something that I’d been doing since I knew how to hold a pen to a paper. I knew I had no way of getting an actual job without connections.
I slowly nodded. “Fine, you’re probably right. Thank you.” My lips curved into a small smile.
“You’ll have a job by the end of this week. It’s time you do something you actually love, Evelyn, instead of wasting away your years like this. It already saddens me that you didn’t have a chance to go to Yale. It was all you used to talk about.”
I breathed out a heavy sigh. “I thought it was my dream but learned that it actually wasn’t after all.”
Lines tugged the corner of his eyes. “What do you mean?”
“Like I made Yale out to be something it was not. I think I was around eleven when I asked Grandma what was the best school to go to become an author and she told me it was Yale, and somehow that stuck with me. Yale became this gilded, magical happily ever after where all my dreams could come true. It was more like if I escaped there, then life would be okay. I wouldn’t end up like my mother. So I don’t really regret not going to Yale. Actually, I’m glad I didn’t, because yes, I would’ve had the opportunity to learn the craft, but there was so much more to that in life, and I now know with all the standards I set for Yale, I would’ve been disappointed anyway.”
“But still you would’ve had the opportunity to go to college.”
A smile curved up my lips as I lifted a shoulder. “Yeah, guess it wasn’t in the cards for me. I was actually going to go with UCLA to be closer to you, but I guess college wasn’t meant for me.”
His eyes widened a fraction as he stared at me intently. But the unasked question lay thick between us. His rough hands went higher and now he was fully kneading the calf on my bad leg.
I couldn’t help the moan that escaped me.
“How’s your knee these days?” His eyes concentrated on my legs as he added more pressure.
“A lot better, just a bit sore more like a dull ache.”
A frown forced its way up his forehead. “Does it always hurt?”
“Yes.”
His frown deepened. “Shouldn’t you get it checked?”
“There’s nothing much that can be done anyway.”
“Did they find out who did this?”
I shook my head. “No. It was so weird. The cops told me it was a robbery, although nothing was taken. I was there one second, and the next, two men were dragging me down an alley for no apparent reason. I had to stay in the hospital for two months, but thankfully, I met Gabe there.”
“So they didn’t catch those fuckers? What did they look like?” he steeled out, his eyes carrying a lace of anger while his grip on my leg increased.
“I have no clue. They grabbed me from behind, and it was very dark, so I couldn’t see a thing. And the cops were the worst. I’d told them repeatedly that they didn’t rob anything, but they kept insinuating that if they didn’t rob anything, I must’ve been buying drugs from them, so that made me shut up and realize they weren’t going to be of much help.”
“Fucking assholes. Did you know why those guys grabbed you?”
“No, it was very strange. All they said was ‘shut up’ and as soon as they pushed me down, they spoke among themselves that it was enough and got the hell out of there.” Deep down I always had the feeling that White had something to do with it. Somehow, she found out I was there and sent someone to stop me from seeing Jay.
“What were you doing there? In the alley?” A curious look crept over his face.
A strained chuckle spurt out of my mouth. “Would you believe me if I said that I was waiting for you?”
His hand froze on my leg, and his stunned eyes met mine. “What?”
I sighed internally—so Jay didn’t really get that call after all. He never knew I was there in the first place. “You were performing at the Bluebird Club that day. They wouldn’t let me in, so I waited outside.”
He didn’t say a thing as he stared at me. “I don’t know what to say,” he whispered.
“You don’t have to say anything,” I whispered back.
He nodded, and the tension between his brows never disappeared after that. It was at times like this that I wanted to get inside his head and know what was going on in there. Was he mad? Did he feel anything? Did any glimmer of him believe that I came back? Did something in him tell him that this could’ve been White’s doing?
I guess I’d never know.
“How about a movie?” he asked just as we finished our writing session.
“Yeah.” I yawned as I grabbed a box of fries and settled on the couch, stretching my feet.
“Are you tired?” He eased in beside me, draping a warm blanket over us.
“Yeah,” I mumbled, distracted by the radiant heat seeping into my body. And as if that was not helping, he leaned and slid his arms behind me.
Fuck.
“So you like movies these days?” He pressed play to the latest superhero movie, and the credits rolled in with dramatic music.
“I don’t really mind. I still like watching TV shows, but I stopped because I used to watch them with Auntie M all the time. And it reminded me of her.” My voice took a somber note.
His large hand grasped mine, linking our fingers as he squeezed.
And soon, my heavy eyelids drooped close as I drifted off.
I woke up with beads of sweat gliding down my back and something hard poking my ass. I gasped for breath as I tried to wiggle out of the strong arms that were caging me between the couch and his heated body.
Did we fall asleep last night?
I tilted my head as I peered at him. He was breathing softly into my neck with a peaceful look on his face as his long eyelashes rested on his cheeks.
I couldn’t help but sweep away the raven locks falling over his eyes.
I gasped as he blinked his eyes open just as my fingers brushed the stray strand away.
“Hi,” I muttered, my voice thick with sleep. I couldn’t take my eyes off his bright blues, so close in the golden daylight spilling in from the window. I could see every single detail, the azure specks lining the outside and the molten cobalt blazing in the center.
A happy grin swept over his face. “Hey.” He surprised me by giving me a quick kiss on the cheek.
I couldn’t stop the smile that curved up my lips.
A loud bark interrupted us before a heavy ball of fur jumped on us.
Jay laughed as he tried to control Strawberry wiggling on top of us while I got swallowed by the both of them, fighting for my next breath.
“Jay,” I wheezed. “If you both don’t get off this couch right now, I might die.”
His loud chuckle filled the room while he dragged Strawberry and got off the couch.
I panted at the ceiling, trying to catch my breath as cold air grazed my skin. I was alive.
“Isn’t Mommy a baby?” he cooed in Strawberry’s ear, grinning widely. And the traitor barked like she agreed.
I rolled my eyes as I blew away the hair sticking to my face, sat up on the couch, and threw off the blankets.
“You’re still coming to the gallery, right?”
I nodded. “Katy will kill me if I don’t.”
Katy was back in LA. With Matt’s label launching next month, Katy had been working behind the scenes to get everything ready for the event. She had tasked me and Jay with procuring art for the auction. The launch event would have a little fundraiser that Katy went into so much detail about that I had no idea what she was talking about.
“Has Matt named it yet
“Nope.” He shook his head, letting Strawberry on her feet as he sat beside me. “That fucker is still thinking about it. We still haven’t finalized the building for the label. But this is just a launch event to announce to the world that we are doing this. The auction will help raise some money and support from some big names.”
I scoffed. “You mean play dress-up in millions while donating a few thousand.”
He smiled. “Unfortunately, that’s how it works.”
“Celebrities, ugh? Money, sex and drugs.” I rolled my eyes.
A sleepish look covered his eyes. “Guilty as charged.”
“I can’t believe it was you who went down the road of drugs. If I had my guess, I thought the first person to try them out would be Mikey.”
“Nah. Mikey would never touch them.”
I rolled my hands over my head and stretched them out. “He’s an amazing man, I love him.”
His head snapped toward me, a grim look creeping over his eyes. “You love him?”
I chuckled at his expression. “I do. He’s always treated me right.”
He tilted his head as he stared at me.
“What?” I laughed.
In an instant, he was at my face, so close that we were barely a breath away. My laughter caught in my throat as I swallowed.
“I don’t like you saying you love other men.”
I raised a brow. “Too bad the man I love doesn’t give a fuck about me.”
His eyes widened, taken aback as he moved a fraction away. “I do give a fuck about you, Evelyn. I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t.”
A devilish grin danced on my face as I brought my lips closer to him. “I didn’t say the man I loved was you, Jay.”
His eyes steeled as they flashed to me.
I couldn’t contain my laughter when he realized that I was mocking him. He shook his head as he turned away, rolling his eyes.
“So do you have any idea what you are supposed to wear to an art gallery?”
A chuckle spilled from his lips. “Still having trouble deciding what to wear?”
My cheeks flamed in a flush. “I was just asking what kind of dress you’re supposed to wear. I can make decisions now. I even decided what shirt to pack for you,” I mumbled.
His chuckle deepened as he cupped my cheeks, bringing my eyes to him. “Why don’t you take a shower, and I’ll pick out an outfit for you?”
I swallowed the thickness down my throat as I dashed to the bathroom. His chuckle still followed my ears.
I took a deep breath as I patted down my wet hair with a towel, drying it as much as I could. I tightened the robe around my waist as I took a cautious step outside.
Any deep breaths I took were a complete waste because my pulse spiked when I took in the sight in front of me.
Jay sat on my bed with a smirk plastered on his face as he gestured to something on his feet. “Are these mine, sweetheart?”
My eyes dragged to the box by his feet. It was the one that had all his T-shirts and hoodies. A blazing fire sizzled my body as I blushed a deeper shade of red and scrambled onto my knees in front of him.
“You weren’t supposed to open that,” I muttered as I placed everything inside and closed the lid.
A callused finger hooked on my chin and tilted my head to meet his eyes. A playful tug pulled his lips like he was trying hard not to smile. “I thought I might find something interesting in there.”
“I, umm…” I fumbled. “I thought you were finding me a dress.”
He shrugged, and his eyes darkened as they took me in. A whisper of wetness from my hair slid down his finger from my chin. My eyes lowered, coming in line with the bulge over his sweats.
My breath hitched as I realized the position I was in. I darted my eyes back to him, and he knew exactly what I was thinking.
A loud thud followed by Strawberry’s bark snapped us back to reality.
“I’ll go get it,” he whispered as he bolted off.
I took a final deep breath and quickly moved the box deep inside my closet.
Just as I rose to my feet, Jay sauntered into my room carrying a dress bag. “This is for you.”
Frowning, I flickered my questioning eyes at him. But he said nothing, gesturing me to open the bag.
The loud hiss of the zipper filled the room as my finger retrieved the dress inside. My eyes widened as I took in the soft pink midi dress. “Jay?” I mumbled.
His lone finger traced the apples of my cheek. “Wear it, I’ll wait outside for you.”
I shook my head. “But this is too much. I just wanted you to pick something that I have.”
“You didn’t have a lot of pink, so I thought I’d add to it.”
I gasped as he smacked my ass, pulling me out of my thoughts. “I’ll wait outside.” He clicked the door closed as he disappeared.
Was it possible to fall in love with a man you were already in love with?
Because that was exactly how I felt.