CHAPTER 29
We finally untangled ourselves after two long sessions in different positions that drove me so fucking crazy.
A thin layer of sweat glistened on our bodies, our heavy breathing crowding the silence of the room.
I wasn’t tired or exhausted one bit. My body felt like a live wire, every nerve ending sparkling alive.
The soreness between my thighs only pulsed, wanting more.
God, I was a glutton for him.
“How about a break?” he asked, pulling me into his arms.
I rested my head against his chest as I grinned. “Are you tired, Jay? So your excessive cardio workout and stupid diet is a complete waste, huh?”
“You menace.” He pinched the side of my waist, which made me ticklish as I squirmed over him. “The break is more for you than it is for me. Trust me, I could keep going all night. But I want to fuck you till daylight, and you need to be able to take me till then.”
I scoffed. “I’m sure you speak from experience.” Although saying it out loud made my heart sink, like an anchor into the depths of an ocean.
“Well, the longest we’ve gone is five that night before I left for my first tour.” He dragged his hand across my back.
“I’m sure you’ve gone longer than that with other girls.” I traced my fingers along the twin dragons smearing his chest to distract myself.
A laugh vibrated his chest. “I wouldn’t know.”
My wandering finger stilled as my head snapped in his direction, his answer not fully registering in my brain. “What do you mean?”
“I wouldn’t know.” He lifted a shoulder. “I don’t remember much before you came along, and as far as I know, they were all quick and messy. And I hadn’t been with anyone else after I met you.”
“What?” I shrieked, clutching his face in my hands. “You mean after you met me now? Like six years later, right?”
“No.” He chuckled. “After I met you, like ever.”
“How is that possible? Don’t lie to me. I’ve been stalking you for years, and I’ve seen the different girls hanging on to you every week.”
A teasing grin spread across his lips. “Stalking me, huh?”
Fuck. A blush tinted my cheeks. “I mean, you can hardly call it stalking because you were all over the media,” I mumbled, trying to hide my embarrassment. “But don’t evade my question.”
He sighed. “Well, I will admit I wasn’t innocent. But I didn’t actually fuck any of them, Evelyn. Most of the time, I was fried out from all the drugs and could barely move a muscle. The girls you saw me with either took the liberty to hang around me or were set up by PR for events.”
“But what about that girl in Germany? It looked like you two were pretty close,” I voiced out, trying hard not to let him notice the jealousy brimming in my undertones.
But fuck, he did. A huge smile overtook his beautiful lips. “You mean Alice?”
“Yeah,” I muttered.
The smile never left his face. “Alice is a good friend. But if I had to be more specific, the woman she came in with was actually her wife. They’ve been happily married for five years now.”
“Oh,” I mumbled, suddenly feeling stupid for all the thoughts that coursed through my head that night. “But why didn’t you? You must’ve had plenty of opportunity.”
“Trust me, I tried. I thought it would help me forget you and that I could finally move on. But I couldn’t go through with it. Every time I touched another girl, all I could think about was you. My heart didn’t allow it.”
My blood elated as dopamine hit me in a rush. “That makes me so fucking happy,” I chirped, grinning.
“I wonder why.” He chuckled.
“Because I felt the same way. I didn’t have the heart to even go on a date with someone else. Let alone fuck someone.”
He gripped my ass, squeezing tight. “Why does the thought of you on a date with another guy make me wanna kill someone?”
“Oh my God,” I screamed in glee. “I feel the same way.” I tapped his chest. “Do you remember the girl who was all over you in the Box club? I wanted to break all of her fingers.”
He laughed. “I didn’t know my girl was a serial killer in the making.”
I stilled, my blood roaring as I peered into his eyes. “You called me your girl.”
“Well, aren’t you?”
“Am I your girl as in you love me?” I whispered.
A visible swallow ran through the column of his throat. “Come with me.” He pulled us out of the bed, grabbed his hoodie, and slipped it over my head.
It took me a second to gather myself. “What?” I mumbled as the softness of his hoodies slid over my bare skin.
He quickly donned a low drawstring pants, lacing my fingers as he sauntered us out of the room.
“Jay, what’s wrong? Was it what I said? Are you kicking me out?”
He twisted his head, rolling his eyes. “I’m not kicking you out in the dead of the night wearing just my hoodie.”
Lines creased their way up my forehead. “Then where are we going?”
“God, patience has never been your virtue, has it?” he remarked as he dragged me to the end of the hallway.
We came to a standstill outside the room that was always locked.
Curiosity got hold of me as I watched him magically produce a key from his hands and unlock the room.
A warm golden light replaced the darkness as we entered the room.
My eyes widened as I took in the sight in front of me.
Pink. There was so much pink.
The walls were in shades of pink, swirling together to create the perfect pink ombre. A light pink couch sat by the corner, the walls littered with frames and frames of pictures.
Pictures of us.
All that I had taken, all that he asked me to send to him.
“Jay,” I whispered, shocked as I went deeper into the room.
A tiny table sat by the lounge chair. On top was a pink notebook, a pink pen, and a pink dinosaur. My shaky hands grabbed them, feeling the softness of the plush toy slithering over my fingers.
My mind flashed right back to the silly joke I made all those years ago.
“Jay.” My eyes darted to him. “What is this room?”
“It’s a room I built for her, the girl I fell in love with all those years ago.”
Confused, I shook my head. “I don’t understand.” I waved my hand around. “You built this for me?”
“No.” His eyes gleamed under the lights. “No, it’s for the Evy I used to love, before LA. I’ve always carried some version of this room in every home I’ve been in the past six years.”
My heart thundered, the confusion never leaving my eyes. I still didn’t understand. “Why are you showing me this?”
He shrugged. “I thought I could separate it. The girl I loved with all that I was and the girl who broke my heart in LA. I used to come to this room, sit here, and remember her, and slowly it got better when I realized my heart was with her, the girl I loved. And I was okay with it.”
“Jay, I still don’t understand,” I croaked out, my mouth suddenly dry.
He strode toward me in two quick steps. “Don’t you understand?” He cupped my cheeks. “I thought I gave my heart away. That I was incapable of loving ever again. But the thing is I have never stopped. All this time, I thought I didn’t have a heart, but having you back in my life surged it alive. It made me realize that I never stopped loving you. I thought I did, but even after all this time, I still love you, sweetheart.”
My vision turned glassy as salty streams trickled out of them. “You love me?”
He pressed his forehead against mine. “Of course I do. I love you more than anything.”
A laugh blubbered out of my lips. “I love you too,” I whispered as we met in a kiss.
Long and soft.
With all our love pouring out of it.
We still had a long way to go, but I was happy.
I was truly, irrevocably happy.
And like last time, it was all because of him.
My smile didn’t leave my fucking face when we finally pulled away.
My eyes immediately landed on the familiar brown-and-black-checkered box. “Wait,” I said, stepping toward it. “Isn’t that the infamous box that no one knows what’s inside? The one you made Tyler and me carry everywhere on tour like it was precious cargo or something.” I raised my brow in question as I turned back to peer at him.
“Yeah.” He smirked. “It’s precious cargo.”
“What is it?” I jumped, my voice honing a hint of glee. “You’ll tell me, right? I’m your favorite person in the whole wide world after all.” I stilled, realizing what just spilled out of my lips.
My favorite question that I asked him all the time. A question that I hadn’t asked him in a long, long while.
It was a silly game between the two of us when we were kids, but it was endearing and sacred.
His eyes widened a fraction as he stared at me. “You are,” he confirmed, a beautiful smile pulling apart his lips.
I couldn’t help but match his smile with mine. “So what’s in this mysterious box?” I waved a hand around.
“Why don’t you open it yourself?”
I nodded excitedly as I dropped to the floor. But my excitement was cut short when I saw the huge padlock in the lid. “But it’s locked.”
“It’s the same code as the apartment.”
“That easy?” I gasped. “Then I should’ve done this long ago. By the way, these numbers are so familiar, but I can’t grasp how I know them.”
“It’s the day I met you,” he said casually as he crouched beside me.
“What?” I squealed, my fingers stilling on the lock pad. It was the day I met him. I can’t believe it didn’t strike my mind. “So you loved me all along?” A cheeky grin marred my lips.
“Yes, ma’am. I think that’s what I’ve been trying to tell you earlier.” He grabbed my face and planted a wet kiss on my nose.
“Okay, okay.” I laughed, pushing him away. “Now let go, I need to open this now.” I rubbed my hands. “I feel like a kid on Christmas morning,” I chirped.
“It’s not going to be that exciting, at least for you.” He lifted a shoulder.
“Well.” I trudged open the heavy lid. “I’ll be the judge of that.” And I certainly did not expect the content that was staring right at my face. “Firebird,” I whispered, shocked. There she was in all her glory, gleaming red, still in perfect condition as I last saw her. “You still have it.” I pried the guitar out, tracing my finger along our engraved initials on the neck.
“I thought you threw it away or broke it,” I muttered.
“No.” He wrapped his arms around me. “I couldn’t part with it. I’ve carried it with me everywhere I went. It’s my very own lucky charm.”
I sniffled as my tears from earlier returned. “I love you so much.”
He laughed as I crashed into him. He carefully returned his guitar back to the trunk.
“I swear that you love that guitar more than you love me.”
He laughed harder, a gleam coating his eyes. “How did you figure that out?”
“Ass.” I swatted him hard on the shoulder.
His eyes softened as he cradled my face with his big hands. “I love you.”
“I love you more.” I beamed.
He swallowed visibly as a serious look crept over his eyes. “I used to say that all the time.”
“What?” I mumbled.
“That I loved you more. But it’s not true, is it?”
“I don’t understand.”
“I loved you loudly, for the world to see. I said big things, showed you off, and I always thought I loved you more.” A slight smile curved his lips. “But you loved me in the quiet and suffered in silence while your entire world fell apart. Your love screamed through solemn walls, Evelyn. It screamed more than my love ever could.”
A tiny drop of tear hung on the edge of my lashes. “You’re going to make me cry.” My voice turned thick with emotion.
“I thought you were already crying.” He caught the tear with his fingertip, pulling me to his chest as he lay flat on the ground.
I sprawled over him, hugging him tight. “I love you.” I pressed soft kisses along his jawline.
“I love you, too, sweetheart.” He tightened his arms around me.
“I’m still mad at you, though, and I still haven’t forgiven you,” I mumbled, fixing my gaze with his. “Oh, and I’m still going to say no to you.”
His chest thundered with a laugh. “Okay.” In a quick turn, he folded us over. My breathing almost got knocked out of me as my back landed on the floor.
“Now I plan to keep my promise.” A wicked grin slithered over his lips.
Heat bloomed over my pre-flushed cheeks. “Promises, promises,” I muttered, and the second I did I knew I was in deep trouble.
Because if Jay was good at one thing, it was keeping his promises.