Chapter Ten #4
“I have made the grave decision to ignore my better judgment for the moment. Your safety is still my highest priority, however,” he bent to whisper, lips feathering over her ear because he couldn’t keep himself from touching her, though he resisted drawing his tongue over her skin, “I can find no sound argument against finishing what we started. Reason, it seems, has forsaken me for the promise of something infinitely more appealing.”
Her teeth clamped down on her bottom lip. Still hovering near her ear, he inhaled the sweet, almond scent as ardor saturated the air. He considered taking her right here. Locking the door and simply ignoring any attempted interruptions. It took every shred of willpower he possessed to pull away.
“After you, Seraphina,” he repeated.
She all but sprinted for the door.
The carriage ride was heavy with the promise of his words, a palpable tension they both avoided.
He couldn’t start here, only to be interrupted when they reached the Court.
No. He would not be interrupted again. The only way to eliminate the chance was to wait.
Patience. Control. Somehow, the promise of a reward for his restraint kindled a sense of satisfaction he wasn’t used to experiencing.
When they arrived at the entrance of Winter, he helped her down with an offered hand, his thumb brushing against her knuckles before letting go.
Even her touch was manageable with anticipation.
He couldn’t ravish her here, in the middle of the street, but he could wait.
Bide time until the right moment, until he could feast in peace. His pace was more brisk than normal.
The walk to his home from the entrance to the court wasn’t far, ten minutes at most, but each step was laced with intention. Energy simmered between their shoulders as they kept a modest distance from each other, fearing that moving any closer and it would ignite.
Kieran reached his front door and paused.
“We should only continue if you’re sure,” he said.
“It’s possible Wraith’s intention canceled Cole’s and there was no danger to you.
It’s possible I can’t see a shadow because there is none, but I’m afraid there is no way to test my abilities without putting you in direct danger. And if I am wrong—”
She set her fingers on his lips, stepping toward him and invading his personal space with her scent and warmth. Warmth that somehow reached him through the chilled air and her thick coat.
“You don’t owe me anything. You’ve already saved me at least twice, so from here maybe we just wing it in plain old human fashion. Let death be a mystery for a bit.”
Her words attempted to soothe a particularly deep, old wound. He relied on his Sense to protect those around him, to be useful.
What good are you?
The words lingered in his every action, tormented his more unsettling nightmares.
Care for no one, but take care of everyone.
He had failed his siblings and ever since he’d been trying to atone by saving everyone else.
His Sense was not just his purpose, it had become the very source of his self-worth.
Always confident in its power because he had told himself a long time ago that he would never grow close enough for him to second guess.
Until Sera.
She seemed to interpret his silence, face scrunching with concern and her touch gentle rather than continuing with the charged atmosphere that had followed them from his office.
“It’s okay to fail with me,” she said, softly, and he glanced sharply at her admission.
“It’s okay to fail with me because I know you’re always going to try.
No one else has ever tried, not for me. Maybe Gideon, to an extent, but he left.
He went to war and I was alone and I made choices that would separate us for most of our adult lives. ”
She brushed at his hair still disheveled from earlier.
He’d been too distracted to fix it, too focused on everything else, and he couldn’t help but lean into the touch.
Because while he’d gone years without sexual contact, he had not felt a comforting touch since the death of his siblings when he was ten.
“I was thinking that I wanted you to know, it’s okay to not be perfect with me. Because no one is, even if you are physically perfect.” Her eyes swept from his chest to his face, appreciation obvious as her tongue lightly parted her lips.
He had never thought not being perfect was an option.
He was about to respond when the door opened. Light from the foyer flooded the porch.
“I thought I heard voices,” Tarley said, taking in the pair of them quickly, even as Sera pulled away. “I’m sorry to interrupt, sir, but you have a visitor. He’s been waiting for hours.”
Another surprise guest? His life certainly wasn’t boring anymore.
“Who?” He asked, stepping inside and when Sera lingered like she was going to slip off to her room he turned to her. “You’re welcome to stay.”
Her gaze shifted from Tarley to him. “Oh, um, are you sure?”
“If you wish,” he said, his tone perfectly even and yet, he thought she still detected the unspoken ‘please.’
Sera grinned, her smile alighting her already pretty features into something truly breathtaking.
Tarley said, “It’s Mister Varian Hawthorne. He’s waiting in the sitting room.”
Kieran started in that direction, listening to see if Sera followed and her light, quick steps bounded just behind him. He kept his focus ahead, quickly wiping the smile from his face before entering the sitting room.
Varian sat on one of the sofas, his posture relaxed as he laughed with Seth, who sat in the adjacent armchair, also smiling with an arm flung over the back of his seat.
Varian stood when they entered, his smile abruptly disappearing as he bowed. “North, I apologize for the unannounced visit. We were just…” He looked to Seth like he needed to explain why they were talking.
“Seth?” Sera entered on Kieran’s heels, taking in the scene with a much more overt display of confusion.
“Sera!” Seth’s affection for her was evident in the way his eyes lit at her presence.
Sera’s regard for Seth was familial, if he read their connection correctly.
Not that he was given to jealousy, or actually, he supposed he had no real frame of reference.
Kieran had never had a relationship to feed envy.
His mind flashed to Miles Harrow and his brazen comments on Sera’s appearance and rage flooded his senses.
Perhaps, he was not entirely immune to jealousy.
But then, why not? Sera had thrown everything else into turmoil.
Though he had always found jealousy a very primitive and oppressive expression of attachment, the thought of Miles savoring even a fraction of Sera’s touch filled him with unreasonable fury.
An odd development, one that did not bode well for his ability to Sense Sera. Though, it was likely far too late.
Sera cast uncertain glances between Seth and Varian. What the fuck was going on here?
Seth hated Varian, last she checked. She didn’t like the unsettled, bad feeling rolling in her gut. It was enough to distract her from everything else. Everyone else.
Seth stood and rolled his eyes. “What? Like I can’t be civil with people? I was down here, bored, waiting for you to get home and debating just going out, but, everything here is so cold I swear I wouldn’t make it five steps. Which leaves me a bit stranded, by the way.”
Sera crossed her arms. “We have to keep a low profile until this Cole situation is resolved, you know that.”
“Anyway,” Seth continued, lifting his chin, “I saw Varian waiting here and I had nothing better to do. Can’t hold his bloodline against him forever, can I? Cole may be an asshole, but that doesn’t mean everyone he knows is as well.”
Varian smiled, and damn it, it was charming. He was adorable. Not really her type, but she saw the appeal. Why was it so hard to like him then?
“It was a pleasant way to pass the evening,” Varian said, casting his eyes toward Seth and bile rose up Sera’s throat.
Sera looked Varian up and down, hands crossed over her chest. He really did look like Cole, but then, when he spoke it was clear they couldn’t be more different. She couldn’t help the protective instinct to keep Seth from more mistakes, more damaging relationships that ended badly.
But then… she was learning that sometimes people surprised her.
The Lady Archer hadn’t asked for any payment for saving her, acted completely without regard for her own interests.
And Kieran… he’d shattered all her prejudice, surpassed every judgment, and consistently proved that he could be trusted.
So maybe he wasn’t a complete anomaly. Varian could be…
genuinely nice, but for some reason she wanted him to leave as quickly as possible.
Kieran directed his words to Varian, “Did something happen?”
Sera realized she forgot Kieran was there. Forgot what they had been doing and discussing before being interrupted again. Now, the missed opportunity of whatever Kieran had been planning soured her darkening mood further.
“I found it,” Varian said, grinning with an earnest excitement.
“It was not easy to track down, I left a lot of boxes untouched and in my haste, neglected to properly label any of them. In fact, I unearthed a book I thought lost to the move. Unfortunately, not before I had purchased it again. Needless to say, it took my constant search over the last few days to locate the Charm but, what else do I have to do with my time?”
“What does that mean?” Seth asked.
“Oh, just that I’ve been rather fortunate enough to spend my time how I wish.
I run the Hawthorne estates, but there are managers that handle most of the work, with me more of a figurehead.
I’m quite lucky, to have such freedoms. Though, I admit it hasn’t offered me much in the way of fulfillment.
” He chuckled. “Forgive me, I shouldn’t complain. ”