29. Tara
“That movie was terrible,” I complained, flopping backwards onto Charlie’s stupidly bougie leather sectional.
His apartment was nice, in a great neighbourhood with fancy as fuck appliances and finishings, but it was sparse. Leave it to a tech bro alpha to give less than a shit about decorating his apartment.
But that didn’t matter, not while everything, down to the wholly unnecessary winter jacket hanging in the front hall closet, smelled of my alpha. It was almost like being in the nest, everywhere. The perfect vibe for the three of us to cuddle and have a lazy day.
Jesse and I purposefully took the same stream days off so we could spend time together, and Charlie seemed to be able to take his weekend whenever he wanted, which was nice. It meant that we could all get together for a movie date like this and relax after a long week.
Perfect.
“We've definitely seen worse,” Jesse said as he grabbed the popcorn bowl, bringing it to the kitchen.
“Yeah but it's been ages, and this one easily takes the cake, at least for horror.”
“You think?” Charlie asked. “I don't think anything could top Killer Clowns on Mars.”
“But that was made to be bad on purpose,” I countered. “Nobody could tell me somebody made that horror movie and thought ‘ yeah this was supposed to be taken seriously. ’”
“Cinematic excellence,” Charlie joked, rubbing a hand along my side affectionately.
“ I don't know,” Jesse chimed in from the kitchen. “ It really seems like those clowns were on a mission, and a pretty serious one at that.”
I couldn't help but laugh, catching Charlie’s hand to twine our fingers. “Yeah, I guess you're right.”
I watched the credits roll, the conversation I’d been artfully avoiding for weeks beginning to knaw at my insides like a starving rat. But I couldn’t put it off anymore, once the sun began to set, I was going to need to tell my pack that I’d come up with an answer about Glitch’s proposal to join me on stream for my heat.
The offer had been on the table for a while. A simple enough deal, really. He came to fuck me live for everyone to watch, and I got a stack of bills that would more than help us pay for the downpayment on a house.
I couldn’t lie, the offer was tempting. Money like that was hard to come by… but my priorities shifted when Charlie and I bonded. Not even the boost to my channel could make me want someone else there when it could be me and my pack.
The idea of fucking some random guy—some random alpha—in my nest, during my heat, infront of a bunch of cameras? It just felt all kinds of wrong.
So, I was going to decline the offer.
Charlie, I was sure, wouldn’t care.
But Jesse? Our financial situation was a lot different than Charlie’s. I knew, obviously, that they’d support me in anything. But it didn’t make me any less nervous to tell him that I was going to potentially set my career back, and lose my whale, in the hopes of making this work.
I didn't think glitch would go anywhere. We’ve had a strong relationship for quite a while—and he seemed to really enjoy watching me with Jesse. But I didn’t know how he would react to being told no. And that made me nervous,
For all I knew, maybe he wouldn’t care. Maybe he was a cucking fiend and would be just as excited by watching me with Charlie. Or even all three of us?
No matter what, risking Glitch was way less important to me than risking my pack. If I needed to get a normal job, I would. Even if the idea made me want to die a little.
I was lost in my thoughts, the couch dipping so that I slid slightly into the divet as Charlie adjusted, drawing me closer. “ What's up baby girl? you seem distracted.”
“A little,” I admitted. “I've been thinking about it— and to be clear I still want to stream and do Afterdark, and maybe even have you guys on sometimes if you want—I think I’m going to turn down Glitch’s offer.” I glanced between the two of them, smiling nervously. “He’s always been so supportive, and it would probably really hurt me if he up and disappeared, but I want to keep streams to just us or solo.”
Jesse put their hand on her shoulder, giving it a comforting squeeze. “That’s fine, sweetie pie. In all honesty I’d be more comfortable with that anyway.”
“Really? But what about the 50k? That’s a lot of money—like life changing money.”
“I don’t care about that,” they said easily, freckled nose scrunching. “We’re both successful, and though we’re not quite yet bringing in the big bucks, we’re doing fine. Plus, we do have an alpha who I’m sure wouldn’t mind giving us a little support if we needed it.”
“Right,” I said noncommittally, putting my hand over Jesse’s.
Charlie chuckled, smirking as he ran his fingers through my hair. I could sense the smugness from him in the bond, tinged with nerves. “It’s true,” he said, kissing my cheek. “I’m stupid rich, I’m afraid. Rich enough to offer you 50k to come onto stream, easy.”
I laughed. “Yeah, you and Glitch apparently. What happened to me that I just attract sugar daddy types?”
“Well, you’re stupid hot for one.” Jesse said with a grin.
“Helpful,” I sighed. “If only Charlie was Glitch,” I joked. “Then I could just nail my alpha on stream and make fifty grand. Problem solved.”
I was clearly joking, Jesse and me laughing at the ludicrous idea until my sides were starting to hurt.
But Charlie wasn’t laughing, he watched the pair of us with so much tension in his shoulders that he appeared stiff. “Um…”
“Oh, yeah! Like Charlie could ever,” Jesse said gleefully, wiping a tear from his eye. “Bend over like a good little omega slut. Does that sound like Charlie to you?”
He turned to face us, and i wasn’t sure I liked the serious expression on my alpha’s face. “Well... problem solved.” he said slowly. “We are the same person.”
My stomach sank. “That’s not funny, Charlie.”
He shook his head taking out his phone to show his logged in profile on the SLCK’d app. His username shining back at me so impossible I was pretty sure I’d spontaneously forgotten how to read.
Glitched_Attraction69. What the fuck? Don't cry, don't cry, don't cry.
“I’m not joking, I’m Glitched_Attraction69… I stumbled across you on SLCK’d a few weeks after the Omega’s Lust and just… signed up.”
My eyes widened in disbelief, the familiar prickly warning of tears in the back of my throat warning I was a few more clipped sentences away from sobbing.
“You’re serious ?” Jesse asked incredulously.
“Yeah, why would I lie?”
“I don’t know? Because you’ve been lying the entire time?”
“I didn’t mean to lie… I just wanted to see you again.”
“And you couldn’t send me a fucking text? We exchanged numbers. You ghosted me , remember?.”
Charlie fidgeted with his hands, the tips of his ears going pink.
I could feel his discomfort in our bond, but I knew he could feel my hurt and disgust just as easily, my stomach turning as the reality of what he was saying sank in.
For a year I'd been thinking about him, dreaming about him. Wishing that we could see each other again. That I don’t know, he’d dropped his phone in a sewer grate the second he’d left Omega’s Lust had no way to contact me after all.
But that wasn’t the trust at all. He’d been lurking, and sneaking, and lying to me from the moment we’d seen each other again. I’d thought our meeting was by chance, but was this entire thing part of some twisted plan?
It made me question everything . Rethink everything .
“I… couldn’t,” Charlie finally managed, looking down at his hands.
I sat there, waiting for him to continue. But as the silence stretched on between the three of us, I realized that he was going to need more prompting.
“What do you mean you couldn’t ?”
His elbows resting on his knees, head hung in shame. “I’m not Glitch.”
My blink was long and slow, the wheels in my mind turning as they tried to make sense of his insane declaration. “You just said you were.”
“No, not like that. I am him, the profile. But I’m not.. You know?”
“No, I most certainly do not fucking know,” I snapped, voice rising.
“I’m not the big, commandeering alpha you need.”
“Who said I wanted that?” I asked angrily, white hot rage making it difficult to sit still. “And who the fuck are you to make that kind of decision on my behalf?”
“You seemed to enjoy it at the heat hotel.”
I was about to snap back, tell him I didn’t give a fuck about him being some macho alpha, when Jesse asked, “What do you mean, heat hotel?”
We both froze.
Jesse had been quiet up until this point, but now they glanced between us.
I sighed, knowing it was time to face the music of my own lies. “Charlie is Mr. Heat Hotel. The alpha who took my virginity.”
Their green eyes bounced between us, that deadpan, devoid of all emotion look they got when they were upset clear on their face. “So you lied?”
“We didn’t lie, but we didn’t want it to be weird,” Charlie said.
“Especially given the surprise bond, and how angry you were at Charlie. We didn’t want to make things worse.”
“So you decided to lie to me together ,” they hissed.
“Baby, it wasn’t about that,” I said, trying to move closer to them but they pulled away. Hurt panged through my chest, but I continued. “We didn’t want you to feel like this was something we planned.”
“It was though, wasn’t it?” they asked, voice laced with disgust. “I’d shown Charlie your photo. He’d known it was you, and he didn’t say a word.”
“What?” I asked, feeling sick. “Is that true?”
“Yeah, I didn’t say anything then, either. And I’m sorry about that. But Tara wasn’t involved, you know I’m shy…”
“It doesn’t matter,” Jesse finally snapped, getting to their feet. “You both knew , and you lied to me. And even worse, you bonded me, while fucking lying to me! Were you just never going to tell me?”
There was a part of me that wanted to insist we would’ve fessed up eventually… But if I was honest, I hadn’t thought about it once. And I didn’t want to lie to them anymore. They didn’t deserve that.
It seemed Charlie was also at a loss for words, or perhaps he was just choosing to say nothing in the hopes that if he want quiet and still enough that both Jesse and I would forget he was there and leave.
The room fell into a tense silence. Jesse stared out the large floor to ceiling window on the other side of the room, his hurt feelings and anger filtering back to me in our connection only adding to my own.
“I think I’m gonna go,” Jesse said, collecting his phone from the coffee table and heading towards the door.
“Wait,” I called after him desperately. “Jesse, please?—”
As I stood, making to leave and follow after him, Charlie caught my forearm. Not enough to actually have any hold, just to stop me. “Tara, I’m so sorry. I know I was wrong I just?—”
His eyes held sincerity, but I couldn’t deal with this right now. I needed to get to Jesse. “I have to go.”
I pulled my arm from his grip. He didn’t call after me or try and stop me again as I raced to the elevators, using my fist to pound the button, praying for it to come back up faster. I would’ve taken the stairs, but we were on the thirty third floor, and there was no way I would’ve been faster.
The elevator finally arrived and I clicked the little M for the main floor before pounding on the close door button. I was surprised it wasn’t broken by the time the doors actually did shut. Jesus I never remembered Elevators taking eighteen years to start moving before, but I was pretty sure by the time they actually shut I would legally be entitled to collect a pension. My foot tapped on the hard floor beneath me as I prayed Jesse was still downstairs when I got there.
And that he’d let me explain.
The doors finally opened again and I took off, sprinting through the overly fancy marble lobby until I reached the street. Thankfully, Charlie had driven us both, so it was my good luck that Jesse was still standing on the curb, trying to hail a taxi.
“Jesse,” I called, my breathing ragged from the running as I approached. For the first time in, I think ever , he didn’t look at me with a bright smile. Only that blank expression I’d only ever seen pointed at others.
Before, I thought it was better than being screamed at. Because as the very least you could have a conversation. But now, I realized, this was infinitely worse.
If he was angry, at least he would’ve said something, even if it was by shouting. But in this moment, I’m left with this cold, unfeeling person that I don’t know at all. A complete stranger.”
“We need to talk.”
“I don’t want to talk right now, Tara,” they said, ordering a car from their cell phone.
“Look, I’m really, really sorry we lied. But there was never any malice behind it, we just didn’t want to make you feel some kind of way.”
“And you thought I couldn’t handle it? That having me find out like this was a better option to what, exactly? An honest conversation between adults?”
“That’s not what I’m trying to say,” I sighed. “Look, how about you cancel your ride and we can talk?”
He turned away to look down the road, probably for his ride. “I don’t think so. Why don’t you just go back to Charlie.”
Now I was getting angry. “We’re a pack. I don’t just want Charlie, I want you both. I want us to work this out.”
Suddenly a small white sudan pulled up to the curb in front of us. “I just… can’t do that right now. I need time.”
Tears threatened to fall from my eyes, but I held them back, my voice tight. “Okay. Yeah. I get it. I love you.”
They sighed. “I’ll… see you around.”
Jesse opened the door and got into the car and I watched as it drove away, each second feeling more like it was taking my heart with it.
Something wet fell to my chest.
At first, I thought it was raining, but when I reached up, I realized I was crying for real, something I didn’t really want to do on the street.
I pulled out my phone and booked my own car, finding that there were about a half a dozen within a couple city blocks
When it arrived two minutes later I got in, everything numb.