Chapter 15
Declan
Ihad to stand for a moment and get my balance before I could move off.
When I was ready to move, I bent down and picked up one of the empty cardboard boxes that had been filled with decorations.
It was light enough that I could hold it in my spare hand as I manoeuvred my way on my single crutch through the cottage.
I opened the only other door in the place, assuming it was a cupboard. I was right. It was stuffed full of coats, shoes, bags, a model of a spine, rolled up posters and—
I shifted position, letting more light shine past me into the cramped space.
Yes, those were definitely Erik’s ice skates. They had the same blue marking down the side that I’d noticed the day before.
Slowly, I leaned forwards, resting my shoulder against the door frame. I reached out to touch the skates. The soft padding inside was wet and spongy.
Those skates had been in water.
But they couldn’t be the ones Erik had been wearing when he went into the lake.
When I heard the bedroom door open, I reeled back, forgetting that I couldn’t balance properly.
I stumbled and found myself falling straight back into a pair of strong arms. Erik’s smaller body pressed against mine, his warmth radiating out.
His arms were tight around me and he held me steady as I got my foot under me and found the right point of balance on my crutch.
“Thanks,” I said.
He let go of me slowly, letting me adjust to not having his support.
“You okay now?”
“Yes. I-I was just startled, that’s all.”
“Oh?”
Was it me or did he glance at the cupboard?
I cleared my throat. “I didn’t mean to pry. I thought I’d put the empty box away somewhere it was easy to reach.”
“Good idea. Sorry my cupboards are so full of junk.”
“Yeah.”
“Come and get some lunch. I’m going to take some paracetamol in to Sonny.”
That jolted me back to our current situation. “Is he in pain?”
Erik reached out a hand and rested it on my arm, as though to steady me in advance of some bad news.
“He has a slight fever. I just rang the doctor again. She said to give him paracetamol and see that he takes on fluids.”
“Does he need to go to hospital?”
“No. She said we should keep an eye on him and let her know if anything changes.”
“What if it does?”
My voice had gone high-pitched but that was because my mind was filled with images of Sonny burning hot and fevered, of him nearly dying all over again, of the snowy roads covered in ice and Erik’s car skidding into oblivion.
I felt a sensation on my arm and looked down. Erik’s hand was rubbing at my bicep, and his soft voice was calming.
“It’s okay. The doctor wouldn’t take unnecessary risks. She said we were to watch him overnight. If there’s no change by morning or he gets worse, I can take him to her in the village.”
“In the snow,” I said, and yes my voice was so high that it cracked.
“It won’t come to that,” he said. It almost sounded reassuring. Erik always sounded so certain, and I wanted to curl up and trust him.
He shoved the empty box into the cupboard and shut the door quickly.
“Probably don’t open that door unless you want to get hit by a box falling out of it. I keep meaning to clear that cupboard out but I never get round to it.”
I nodded absently and Erik began to manoeuvre me into the kitchen. Perhaps the shock had shaken something loose in me because I blurted out, “Your skates are back in the cupboard.”
“Oh.” Erik’s voice changed ever so slightly. “Those are my spare skates.”
“Sure.”
That was logical. It was a perfectly reasonable explanation.
I had no idea why I didn’t believe him.
I blurted again, “You were naked.”
Erik stopped ushering me through the kitchen doorway and instead eased me back against it so I could lean. Then he stepped up close, so close that I thought for a second he was going to kiss me. That would make me forget what we’d been talking about so it might have been a good tactic.
He didn’t though. He said, “Yes, I was.”
“How?”
The silence stretched out between us and Erik’s eyes drifted down my face to rest on my lips. I licked them, suddenly nervous.
“I can’t explain it,” he said at last. “It was the only way I could reach Sonny in time.”
I nodded. I’d take that explanation, as long as Sonny were alive and well.
“Are you sure we shouldn’t do something for him?”
“Why don’t you take the paracetamol in and try to get him to take them? I’ll make us some lunch.”
Taking the little packet, I made my way back through the cottage, hesitating in the doorway of the bedroom. When I went in, I noticed that the air was cool but Sonny had shoved his blankets down and was sleeping fitfully.
I made my way across to the side of the bed and sat down facing him.
“Sonny? Sonny, you need to take these.”
I popped two of the tablets from the packet and grabbed the bottle of water still on the side table.
Sonny opened his eyes and looked at me, though I wasn’t sure he was really seeing me. He looked flushed and his fair hair was damp with sweat.
“Here,” I said again and helped him to lean up and take the medicine.
When Sonny lay down again, he breathed out a long sigh. His voice was hoarse. “They’re gone.”
“What are gone?”
“My tentacles. They saved me.”
“Yeah, sure, of course they did.”
He nodded and closed his eyes, mumbling, “Will they come back?”
“If you want them to.”
I stayed with him for a while longer, just watching him sleep, listening to his regular breathing and the little moans he let out as he thrashed his head from side to side.
I wanted to take away all his pain, wished I could draw it into my own body and keep it away from him. My ray of sunshine. Love of my life.
The first tear that rolled down my cheek took me by surprise and I brushed it away. My eyes were fixed on Sonny, almost afraid to look away. Even now, with his flushed face and damp hair, he looked so beautiful.
I wanted to reach out and wrap myself around him, desperate to keep him here with me after he nearly slipped through my fingers.
“Don’t leave me, Sonny,” I whispered.
He moaned and thrashed his head again. I didn’t think he’d heard me. Probably just as well.
I jumped guiltily when Erik opened the door and peered around it. “Lunch is ready.”
When he saw Sonny, he came further into the room and walked around the bed to the other side. He sat on it, mirroring me, and placed one hand on Sonny’s forehead.
“Is he getting worse?” I asked.
“No, the same.”
“Is he in pain?”
“No, I think it’s just a bad dream,” he said.
I watched in amazement as he reached out to stroke Sonny’s forehead and the frown that had marred Sonny’s brow even in sleep smoothed out and he quieted.
Erik murmured some soft, soothing words almost too quietly for me to hear.
It didn’t matter. All that mattered was that Sonny heard them. And they calmed him down.
In barely two minutes, Erik had lulled Sonny into a deep, untroubled sleep.
My throat felt tight as I watched it. It was such an obvious thing, I realised. Of course Sonny would fall for his rescuer. It made sense.
And, as I watched the two of them together, their slender frames and their goodness radiating out, I couldn’t think of a single reason why it wasn’t the best idea ever.
Erik and Sonny would be perfect together.
And me? Well, I could be glad for them.
At least they were both here and alive and if they were happy then I’d be happy, too.
It took me a few times to be able to swallow properly because my throat was too constricted. Then I managed to ask, “Do you really think he’ll be okay?”
“Of course I do. He’s already sleeping more soundly than before.”
“He might have been delirious. He was muttering about tentacles.”
Erik’s cheeks went pink and he ducked his head, easing off the bed and walking to the door. “He was probably dreaming. Come and have lunch; it’ll make you feel better. I’ve heated up some soup and rolls.”
I stood, leaning on my crutch, and made my way out of the bedroom. Behind me, Sonny slept and I didn’t know if I were imagining it or not but his cheeks were less flushed than before. I hoped so.