Chapter 28
Erik
It had only taken me a minute to establish that Sonny was not upstairs, which meant I’d followed Declan towards the kitchen pretty quickly. And I’d heard Sonny’s blabbering. He looked flushed from alcohol, though not drunk. Just tipsy enough to lose his filter and blurt out his fears.
He’d always seemed so confident and happy with himself and with our new relationship that I hadn’t realised how many thoughts had been whirring round his head.
I had assumed he’d taken it in stride. He’d been the one to lead the way into this thing, after all. Now I knew better, I’d make sure I checked in with him more often, but I was very new to this and I was learning.
Having heard him worry about where he’d live, though, I could calm that fear straight away.
I slid another of my tentacles out and moved nearer to them so I could wind it around their bodies.
“I’d like you both to move in with me. If you don’t want to leave your flat or your job, Sonny, we can work something else out. Get somewhere to live near you.”
“You love that cottage, though, don’t you?”
“Yes, but nowhere near as much as I love my—”
I cut myself off, suddenly realising I’d need to explain what mates were. I’d do it soon, but not right now. That kind of news could derail the conversation and I wanted to make sure we were all on the same page here before we moved on. I wanted our foundation to be strong.
So I carried on. “Nowhere near as much as I love the two of you.”
For my mates, I’d live in the city, even though I hated cities because I found the noises and the smells overwhelming, and there was nowhere safe and quiet and secluded for me to shift and slide into the water.
Sonny gasped and his hand grabbed for the tentacle that was wound around him, as though he could press it closer.
“You love me?” he asked.
Love was such a strange word. It encompassed so much, and it had all sorts of connotations. And people would say that I couldn’t love Sonny after only five days. But I’d been learning about him for weeks before I ever met him.
And, most of all, I couldn’t deny what my octopus knew. Declan and Sonny were my mates.
That meant I loved them. Loved them both.
I wanted to mark them both equally, both as urgently and as permanently. These two men were mine.
“Yes, I love you. I know it’s new, but that doesn’t make it less real.” I looked to Declan, too, and slid another tentacle over his shoulder. I loved seeing it there, winding round my mate’s body. “I love you both.”
Sonny stroked a hand down the tentacle that was wound round his waist. “I love you, too. Weird, isn’t it? I thought I’d hate you.”
Declan asked, “Why?” and Sonny and I shared a look, just meeting each other’s eyes for the briefest moment.
We understood each other on that. We’d both assumed we’d have to compete for Declan’s love.
I was so glad we hadn’t. Declan had more than enough love and attention for the two of us, and I’d give Sonny all the love and attention he could want on top of that.
“Are you sure you want both of us to move in with you?”
“Yes, I am.”
“Where will we put all our stuff? You don’t have room.”
I shrugged, winding another tentacle around Sonny’s thigh where I knew he loved it and where I got a lot of satisfaction from holding him.
“I don’t know but we’ll work something out. I guess we could start with a shed and I’ll store my junk there until I can sort through it properly, and you can put your stuff in the cupboard.”
“That works.”
I got the impression that Sonny was so happy he would agree to almost anything. Declan, however, was frowning again. I felt a flash of sharp love for him, my mate who took things so seriously and wanted to plan things through.
“I don’t want you to leave the city, Sonny. You like it there. We can find a way.”
Sonny shrugged. “I don’t like it that much.
I mostly liked it because you were there.
It’s sucked the past few months. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoyed it when we were together.
It was fun and there was lots to do. But I’d rather be with you and Erik anywhere, and here is best of all.
We can see your mum and dad every week and Erik has his lake and we can go to the market for mince pies—”
“You know they stop serving them after Christmas, right?” asked Declan.
“Yeah, but until then. And in the new year, they serve other things. The point is, I only live in the city because my job is there. I can get a new job. I’m not that ambitious. Not when it comes to my career.”
I glanced at Declan to see how he reacted to that, wanting to use his expression to gauge how truthful that statement was. He looked rueful, so I supposed Sonny was being honest. He really would be happy to change jobs.
“I can’t get you both a job as receptionist,” I joked.
Sonny stuck out his tongue at Declan, reminding me that he wasn’t exactly sober.
“I’d be an amazing receptionist, actually.
I like peopling. People like me or maybe I just ask them too many nosy questions but anyway, the point is I’d be serious competition.
Declan’s not going to be a receptionist forever, anyway.
That’s only temporary, until he gets back on his feet. So to speak. Sorry, Declan.”
Declan gave him a smile and Sonny’s eyes took on a slightly misty quality. He was so in love it would be sickening to watch if I didn’t think Declan was exactly as amazing as Sonny did.
“I mean,” he corrected himself, “that Declan’s only receptioning – is that a word?
– until he’s got his confidence back and then he’s going to do great things.
He’s been talking about your physio sessions, you know.
He finds it all interesting. I reckon he might start training with you and then he can work next door to you and you’ll be close all day and—”
“And we’ll sneak off into that supply cupboard?” I asked.
“Yeah.”
“Nice to know you’ve got everything all planned out for us.”
Sonny nodded, not picking up my amused irony.
Declan looked thoughtful, which meant something had struck a chord.
I wondered what it was. Maybe Sonny was onto something about Declan training to be a physiotherapist. I’d talk to him about it, but not right now.
I wanted to make sure our relationship was solid before talking about the future. Besides, Declan needed thinking time.
I used the tip of a tentacle to tilt Sonny’s face towards me. “So? Are you moving in with me and Declan in our cottage, then?”
The smile he gave blinded me. It was one of his radiant sunshine smiles that lit up the room in gold hues.
“Yes please. I was so sad I thought I’d cry but I’m not now. You both keep making me happy.”
“I’m so glad you’re happy.” To Declan, I asked, “How do you feel?”
He gave me a nod. “Happy. Better now I know for sure we’re all in this properly.”
I wound myself around them tighter, feeling the contours of their bodies, the way they were shaped and the way they fit together as they kissed again. I was mesmerised by the sight of them, my mates together.
A footstep outside the kitchen surprised me, and I jolted. As quickly as I could, I retracted my tentacles, yanking them back inside me.
I was only just in time.
My shirt was still rucked up and I was sure my skin still had a purple tinge when Lilian entered the kitchen.
Luckily for me, her eyes weren’t on me. They were on her son. Who was making out with Sonny.
The two of them broke apart, looking every inch the naughty schoolboys I was sure they had once been. Well, perhaps not Declan. I would lay odds that Sonny had been the ringleader in any mischief.
She stood, frozen in the doorway, and all she managed to say was a faint, “Oh.”
Declan took a step, and I saw his body sway in the particular way it did when he’d stepped too suddenly and hadn’t caught his balance yet. He took another couple of tiny steps, adjusting his posture so he was steady.
Sonny was the first to speak. He blurted out, “He’s not cheating on Erik! Declan would never do that.”
He gestured at me, and Lilian’s eyes turned to me for the first time.
I saw that information click in her brain by the way her expression changed.
I was sure that, until that point, she’d actually not considered it.
Her surprise had been to find her son kissing anyone, and probably especially surprised it was his childhood best friend.
Though how she hadn’t known those two had it bad for each other, I don’t know.
“I… didn’t think he was. So… perhaps someone could explain to me what was happening.”
I really hoped Sonny wasn’t drunk enough to tell her in detail about the way Declan had been kissing him. With Sonny, there was probably a fifty/fifty chance.
Declan cleared his throat, so I stayed quiet, letting him speak.
“We’re together, Mum. Sonny and I. I-I mean Sonny and Erik and I are all together. Boyfriends.”
When Lilian frowned, I noticed distractedly that she had the same way of doing that as Declan. Then I braced myself for what would come next.
She said, “I don’t know what we’ll do. Your bed isn’t big enough for three grown men, Declan. I could see if your Dad can dismantle the one in the spare room and move it into yours.”
We all stared at her. “Excuse me?” I asked.
She looked flustered, “Perhaps I was wrong. I don’t know anything about these modern relationships. Are you all going to sleep in Declan’s room tonight?”
“Yes.” I was very firm about that. I didn’t want anyone getting any ideas about separating me from my mates.
“I don’t know how you’ll all fit.”
I wanted to laugh with relief, but pulled the urge back inside me in case I offended her.
It was such a tangent, and it was exactly the kind of worry Declan would have, too.
How to manage the sleeping arrangements so we were all comfortable, and not judging the fact we were in a relationship in the first place.
It suddenly became very clear to me that the reason Declan chafed under his mum’s roof was that they were so similar. They were both caretakers but also both a little intense.
Sonny took a little step forwards. His clothes were very rumpled and his lips and cheeks were red with beard rash because Declan hadn’t shaved in the best part of a week. It made him look incredibly vulnerable.
“Are you okay with it?” he asked.
She gave a firm nod. “As long as you’re happy, I don’t mind. Is this a long-term thing?”
Embarrassed, Declan groaned, “Mum.”
Lilian said, “Well I don’t know, Declan. I don’t know about all these modern types of relationships. I want to know if it’ll be the three of you here for Christmas next year.”
“Don’t forget Easter,” Sonny reminded her.
She patted his cheek. “Of course not, Sonny. It’ll be nice to have you back.”
Sonny sniffled. “I’m so glad you’re happy, Lilian. I didn’t want to upset you.”
“Of course you didn’t. I can’t imagine anyone more worthy of Declan’s love than you. And Erik seems such a nice, steady young man. He’s just what the two of you need. As long as you’re taking care of each other, I’m happy. Are you still going to live in the city?”
I decided this was where I needed to step in and make sure there was no misunderstanding. “We’re still deciding exactly how this will work, Lilian. But I want both Declan and Sonny to move in with me. As soon as we decide anything, we’ll let you know.”
“Very well.” She took a deep, steadying breath, and I could feel Sonny and Declan doing the same. “Why don’t you start making the supper?”
She gave Sonny’s cheek a last pat, and Declan’s shoulder, and then she left, closing the door behind her.
Perhaps she thought we wanted some privacy for more kissing.
Declan looked pale. I walked up to him and wrapped my arms around his waist, holding him steady and hoping he’d feel more supported. My tentacles rippled along my sides but I didn’t let them out. That was too risky. I’d been careless before.
“She took it well,” I said.
Sonny sniffled again. “She’s the best. I knew she wouldn’t mind if you were happy, Declan.”
“Yeah,” he said. Then he shook his head slightly, shaking off his shock. “Yeah, she is. She— I’m glad she doesn’t mind. I wouldn’t have given you up, anyway.” He looked over his shoulder to the closed door. “Do you think she really doesn’t mind or she was just putting on a good front?”
“I think she was surprised, but she will be fine.”
Sonny said, “Of course she’s fine with it otherwise she wouldn’t have put us on sandwich-making duty. Lilian takes her catering very seriously. It’s an honour to be left unsupervised in her kitchen, you know.”
I smiled. “Sandwiches? There’s more food?”
Sonny gasped, “Of course there are sandwiches for supper. I’ll make the turkey and cranberry, you can do turkey and mustard, and Declan can make cheese and pickle.”
“Do you have room for any more food?”
“I do if it’s Lilian’s turkey and cranberry sandwiches. She makes the best cranberry sauce. Do you want to try some?”
“I’ll try it later, in one of your sandwiches.”
Sonny’s eyes watered again and he gave me a soppy look that had my octopus clenching with the desire to mark him as ours.
As Sonny started clattering round, getting out plates and bread and what looked like enough left-over turkey to make three meals, I faced Declan, feeling his warmth in my arms. “How do you feel about all this?”
He took a deep breath. “I think I’m okay. It all just happened so fast, you know? I-I’m glad she knows. I never meant to keep it a secret.”
“Lilian’s very cool,” said Sonny as he stooped down and picked up the sprig of mistletoe I’d dropped when I’d retracted my tentacles so suddenly.
“Yeah, she is. She’s probably warning Dad about it now so he isn’t shocked when we tell him later.”
Sonny snorted. “Your Dad will take it in stride. The man is unflappable.”
Declan agreed. “He didn’t care about me being gay, and I think as long as I’m safe and happy he won’t mind who I’m with. He might even prefer that it’s you, Erik. He likes you and he’s always treated Sonny like a son.”
A little hope unfurled inside me that, one day, this family might think of me as a son, too.
Sonny raised his hand over Declan’s head. Declan looked up, trying to focus on what Sonny was doing. He was holding that mistletoe.
I waited for Sonny to kiss Declan but he didn’t. He was looking at me expectantly.
Chuckling, I asked, “You still want me to kiss Declan every time you do?”
“Yes!”
Declan smiled and turned in my arms, moving his body carefully in my embrace. When he was steady, I tilted my face up so he could kiss me.
“If you insist.”