Chapter 21 #11
He had just climbed the stairs and trudged into his chamber when he heard Maggie’s frantic voice behind him.
He sighed loudly and swore repeatedly under his breath, feeling utterly defeated.
Maggie had adored Ella. She was not going to take kindly to the news he had sent her away, and he was not in the mood to deal with the woman’s hysterics.
Not when his whole world felt like it was coming apart at the seams.
“Ceann! Ceann, Ella’s missing. She’s been gone for days! We had hoped maybe she had gone with you, but the guards said you came back alone... do you know where she might be? We have to find her!”
When Ceann said nothing, did not even turn around, she ran to him, desperately grabbing his arms, “Why are you just standing there? I told you, Ella is missing, she could be somewhere hurt…”
Ceann put Maggie firmly away from him, his eyes distant as he spoke. “No Maggie, she’s not missing. I’ve sent her away. I told her to return to her home. She’s not who you think she is. It’s for the best… I…”
He was stopped short by the woman’s horrified gasp and the sudden tears that welled in her eyes, rolling accusingly down her round rosy cheeks.
Her hand flew to her mouth as if to stifle a scream.
When finally she could speak she looked at him as if he were the devil himself.
“How could you send her away? Why would you do such a thing? Why, she loves you, anyone can see that.”
Ceann sighed; his own hurt was too raw. He just wanted to be alone with a flask of whiskey to nurse his wounds for a few more days.
Or perhaps longer. Having Ella’s love would have been his dream come true, but that dream was dead now.
“Maggie”, he said, as gently as he could manage.
“I know you’ve come to care for the lass, but you should know, she deceived us all. ”
Maggie looked horrified, and rightly so, thought Ceann. It would certainly come as a shock to the woman that Ella was not what she seemed…
“She didn’t!” the woman cried indignantly. “Why that lass is nothing if not an angel, with a heart as big as any I’ve ever known, at that.”
Ceann shook his head. “It was all a ruse. I found out she came here to search the castle. I don’t know for what, but I can only guess it’s something of great value to someone for her to take such a risk…”
Maggie’s eyes widened. “You still think she’s a spy?
A thief? After all that she’s done for us?
You thick-heided man, she came here for you!
She was sent to you because she’s your one true mate, you brainless lout!
” She stomped her foot on the wooden floor for emphasis.
Her occasional eavesdropping had paid off the night she heard Ethan and Iona plotting together in the wood behind the stable.
Even still, she liked to think she would have seen it on her own.
“A simpleton could see what you are to each other!”
For me? My one true mate? His mind reeled dizzily. He knew it wasn’t true; but then why did those words seem to stop his heart for a moment?
Maggie’s hand flew to her mouth, as if she had suddenly remembered something.
“Oh God, the bairn! Where is she Ceann? Tell me! Which way did she go? You did send her off with guards, didn’t you?
You wouldn’t leave her to be set upon by thieves.
If anything happens to the bairn I swear I’ll never forgive you! That child is innocent in all of this.”
Ceann felt his stomach suddenly fall to the floor, while at the same time his heart thudded slowly and loudly in his ears. It was hard to draw a breath to speak.
“What bairn?” he asked in a weak voice, not daring to hope.
“Yours, you foolish, insensible man! The curse is broken at last. She carries your bairn, and now you’ve sent her away to God knows where when you should be protecting her and your child with your very life!
” She paused, and drew in a deep breath in an effort to calm herself enough to continue.
“Did she not tell you herself? I sent her to find you as soon as I had confirmed it. She was in such a state when she found out.” She twisted and wrung her hands.
“Said you wouldn’t wed her, said you’d told her you couldn’t ever get a woman with bairn… ”
“I can’t!” Ceann groaned as he sat down heavily on the bed.
His head swirled and he felt sick deep inside.
“I didn’t think I could, Maggie… I… oh God, what have I done!
” She came here for me? What was he supposed to think?
What could he believe? He looked up at her with such anguish in his eyes that Maggie took pity on him and came to put her hand on his arm.
His thoughts were swimming, but through it all, hope... “Are you sure? Are you absolutely sure?”
“Of course I’m sure”, she replied indignantly, “I examined her myself, and I’ve seen more bairns into this world than…”
“But how is it possible?” he said as if to himself.
With a gusty sigh Maggie put her hands on her hips and eyed him speculatively.
“I think you know exactly how it’s ‘possible’ young man, and if I weren’t so worried about Ella right now, I’d beat you senseless for what you’ve done to her.
Devil take you! What could you be thinking?
And she an innocent lass! I asked her did you offer her marriage after you took her and she told me no, you didn’t!
Why your own good mother, were she here, would take a strap to your hide and say she raised you better. And your father, why he would have…”
Ceann stood abruptly, cutting off Maggie’s moral tirade.
“I’m going after her; I made a mistake… I have to find her.
” He took a deep breath, and his whole body trembled.
“I didn’t send guards, Maggie; I don’t even know where she went!
Oh God.” Damn it, he’d been a fool, acting on his hurt and pain, not even giving her a chance to explain.
She’s mine. And in his heart he knew now that it was true.
He had known all along, but had chosen to stubbornly deny the truth.
He could only hope it wasn’t too late. A child.
My child. Unshed tears burned the backs of his eyes. God, Ella I’m so sorry…
Iona turned from the window, her eyes still distant, narrowed, seeing things that Ella could not. “He searches for you, lass.”
Ella, seated by the fire, crossed her arms and tilted her chin.
“Let him”, she said, “I don’t want to see that man, I don’t think I’m ready to forgive him yet.
” She had been staying with Iona in her small cottage for nearly three weeks now, but the pain in her heart hadn’t lessened.
She was grateful to the other woman for taking her in when she had appeared on her doorstep with Ethan, exhausted and tear-stained, with nowhere else to go.
Grateful for the sympathetic ear as she told her story, well the parts of it she could…
and Iona didn’t ask for the rest. Ella had the feeling she knew anyway.
Iona could See almost as well as Malcolm.
Iona sat down beside her, picking up her hand and patting it gently, like a mother would.
“Ella love, I can’t tell you what you should do, but you should know that Ceann is a good man.
He will see his mistakes, and he will make amends.
He wronged you, yes, but he acted on his own deep hurt, and the fear that nothing so perfect could ever be his.
He cares for you more than you know, but he’s been too afraid to let those feelings grow.
” She paused, gently wiping away the single tear that was rolling down Ella’s cheek.
“Lass, don’t you think he has a right to know he is to be a father? ”
Ella gasped in astonishment. “How did you know about… oh, never mind.” Iona had the Sight, of course she would know.
What else did she see? She set her jaw. “I tried to tell that bad-tempered, unreasonable man that he got me with child, even after he swore he couldn’t!
He wouldn’t listen, and he most likely wouldn’t have believed me anyway.
He still thinks I’m a spy”, she added irritably.
Iona smiled gently at her, and stood, releasing her hand.
The sudden absence of her touch made Ella realize how warm it had been, and comforting.
Like Esme’s touch when she had been a little girl.
But now she was a grown woman, and soon to be a mother.
She would have to sort things out for herself, as best she could.
Standing, Iona went to the door and opened it, turning to look back at Ella, her eyes held an almost pleading look.
“The bairn is a true blessing, Ella. And as you are his very heart, please give my son another chance to make things right.”
She closed the door behind her as she went out, leaving Ella alone with her parting words. Before they had even sunk in, the door opened again. It was Ethan.
He looked at her as she sat with her mouth gaping open in stunned silence. “Ah she told you. Subtle, isn’t she?”
It was another moment before Ella could speak again. “Iona is Ceann’s mother? Ethan, I had no idea… how could that be? He said his mother had died years ago.”
He smiled at her bewildered look. “Aye, Iona is his birth mother. But he doesn’t know it, not yet anyway. I only found out not long ago myself that we are half brothers. It certainly explains all of the bickering we did as boys.”
“And how close you are as men,” she said with a soft smile. “But Ethan, how… I mean… what…”