Chapter 27
TWENTY-SEVEN
JULIEN
The generator’s guts spill across the dirt at my feet, Cameron’s hands deep in its heart.
“Hand me that wrench,” he says. “The smaller one.”
I pass it to him, wiping sweat from my forehead with my arm. The mid-day sun beats down on us, turning the small clearing into an oven.
Dakota left three hours ago.
Every night, she curls against me like I’m her personal furnace, then bolts at dawn like Cinderella if Cinderella was running from feelings instead of a curfew.
Every morning, I fight the urge to throw her over my shoulder and cuff her to my bed.
Not kidnapping. Just… preventing her from leaving. There’s a difference.
Fuck, I’m losing it.
“So.” Cameron doesn’t look up from the tangle of wires. “You want to talk about it?”
“About what?”
“Whatever’s making you look like you want to murder that poor generator.”
I pass him a rag without being asked. “Focus.”
“I am focused.” He tightens a screw, the metal giving a satisfying click. “But you’re not. You’ve been checking the Levines’ cabin every five minutes.”
Have I? Shit.
Cameron chuckles. “So. Dakota.”
My head snaps toward him. “What the—”
“Oh, come on.” He sits back on his heels, wiping grease from his hands. “You think I didn’t notice? My cabin’s right across from yours. I see her leave. Every morning.”
“You’re spying on me?”
“Our cabin’s right there, man. Sienna thinks it’s cute. Says Dakota’s got it bad.”
“It’s not like that.”
“Then what’s it like?” He holds up two wires.
It’s like torture. Having her so close but never close enough. Holding her while she sleeps, but watching her leave. Wanting her lips against mine, her body under mine, but settling for these stolen hours because I don’t want to pressure her.
“Complicated,” I finally say.
Cameron makes a sound halfway between a laugh and a snort.
My hands clench and unclench. I force them to relax. “I don’t need relationship advice from my little brother.”
“Clearly, you need something.” He reconnects the final wire and sits back. “Try it now.”
I crank the generator’s starter. It coughs once, twice, then roars to life, the smell of gasoline and hot metal filling the air. Electricity hums through the lines we’ve been repairing for days. Lights flicker on in the main lodge, and someone, probably Rosa, cheers from inside.
“Told you I could fix it.” Cameron’s face is streaked with grease, hair sticking to his forehead with sweat, but he looks happier than I’ve seen him since before the world went to shit.
“Never doubted you.”
Cameron’s always been good with his hands, better than me at putting things back together when they break.
Movement catches my eye. Dakota and Sienna are walking along the path toward the main lodge, heads bent close in conversation.
She’s changed into fresh clothes, hair pulled back in a loose braid, the morning sun catching on its dark strands.
Her walk is different with Sienna—looser, more relaxed.
A smile breaks across her face, and the sight of it hits me like a punch to the chest.
“That’s one chocolate bar for me.” Cameron follows my gaze. “You’ve got it worse than I thought.”
I tear my eyes away. “Don’t know what you’re talking about.”
He taps his chin. “How is that saying? Like a hungry… No. Like you’re seeing water after a week in the desert.”
“Dramatic much?”
“Accurate much?” He throws the dirty rag at me. “Look, I know you. You’re planning seventeen different scenarios for how this plays out, calculating odds, minimizing risk. But maybe, and hear me out, maybe, you should just tell her how you feel.”
“She knows.”
“Does she?”
“Yes.”
“For someone who spent years in tactical operations, you’re a shit liar.”
“And you’re a pain in my ass.”
“Yeah, but I’m a pain in your ass who just fixed the generator.” He pets it like a dog. “If you care about her—”
“I don’t want to talk about it.”
“—then tell her. Before you explode or she runs for good.”
I glance back toward the path. Dakota and Sienna have disappeared inside the main lodge. “How’s it working with Ramirez?”
“Good. He knows his shit. Found a stash of booze yesterday hidden in one of the maintenance sheds.”
“Of course he did.”
“We were thinking…” Cameron scratches his jaw. “About a little get-together tonight? Nothing crazy. Just something to take the edge off. Boost morale.”
“A party.” I stare at him. “In the middle of a zombie apocalypse.”
“Not a party. A… social gathering. With alcohol. People need to unwind sometimes. Not everyone can survive on pure discipline and brooding.”
“I don’t brood.”
“You’re brooding right now.”
“I’m concentrating.”
“On Dakota’s ass?”
“Did someone say party?” Sienna appears around the corner of the shed, grinning like she’s been eavesdropping. Which she definitely has.
“Social gathering,” I say. “With alcohol. Apparently.”
“Sounds perfect.” She drapes her arm around Cameron’s waist, and his hand finds her shoulder automatically.
The easy intimacy between them highlights everything I don’t have.
“Where’s Dakota?” I ask.
Sienna’s grin turns knowing. “She’s helping Maya. Why? Did you need something from her?”
“No.” Too quick. Too defensive.
Cameron and Sienna exchange a look that makes me want to strangle them both.
“Oh, before I forget.” Sienna snaps her fingers. “Amelia is looking for you.”
“Why?”
“No idea.” Sienna twines her fingers with Cameron’s. “She seemed… I don’t know. She’s doing better. Walking around more.”
“Good for her.”
“Yeah.” Sienna draws out the word. “Anyway, she’s at their cabin.”
Okay. Handle Amelia first. Whatever she needs, it’ll be quick. Then I can figure out this mess with Dakota.
“Try not to burn the place down with your party planning.” I turn to leave. “And turn off the generator. We need to save on the fuel.”
“It’s a social gathering!” Cameron calls after me.
I lift my hand in acknowledgment without turning back.
If only fixing everything else were that simple.
Turn a wrench, flip a switch, and suddenly Dakota stays.
If only.
The Levines’ cabin door looks the same as all the others, weathered pine with a brass knob worn smooth by years of tourist hands. The only difference: Enemy territory. Nicklas is still on my shitlist. I wish I could get rid of him, but Dakota wouldn’t want that.
Not yet, at least.
I knock twice. Firm but not aggressive.
Movement sounds from inside—lighter than Nicklas’s heavy tread, too quick for Carmen’s slower pace. The door swings open to reveal Amelia, a book clutched to her chest, her face lighting up with a smile that transforms her pale features.
“Julien!” She takes a half-step back. “You came.”
“Sienna said you were looking for me.” I keep my voice neutral, noticing the flush in her cheeks. She looks better. Healthier. Good. Maybe Dakota will worry less.
“Yes.” She tucks a strand of dark hair behind her ear. “I was hoping that if you’re not too busy, I’d love to sit by the lake.”
“The lake?”
“Mom and Dad won’t let me go alone.” She rolls her eyes. “And Dakota’s always so worried, hovering like I’ll break if she blinks.”
“Can’t Cam take you? Or Sienna?”
“Oh. I thought… You know. I just want to sit by the water for a bit. Like we used to when we were kids.”
I remember those summers. Amelia and Dakota had been visiting, and the four of us, Cameron included, spent hours by the water at Rosa’s house. Before our fathers turned business into blood.
“Okay,” I say. “I’ve got some time.”
“Great! Let me just…” She turns to place her book on the side table and wobbles, grabbing the door for support.
“You sure you’re up for this?” Dakota would kill me if I let Amelia overexert herself. “It’s a bit of a walk.”
“I’ve been cooped up for days. I’m fine.” But when she takes another step, her knees buckle.
I catch her elbow, steadying her. “Maybe we should—”
“No.” She looks down, shy. “Maybe you could carry me?”
“Piggyback or—”
“Could you carry me properly? If it’s too much trouble—”
“It’s fine.” I scoop her up, one arm under her knees, the other supporting her back.
Her arms loop around my neck, head resting against my shoulder. “Thank you.”
The path to the lake is well-worn now, packed dirt from our daily runs.
“You look tired,” she says.
“Apocalypse will do that.”
“No, I mean…” Her fingers shift against my neck. “Never mind.”
I set her down on one of the flat rocks near the water’s edge, making sure she’s stable before stepping back.
She pats the space beside her. “Sit with me?”
I lower myself to the rock.
“Beautiful, isn’t it?” She gazes out over the water. “Peaceful.”
“Mm.”
“Remember that summer you taught us to skip stones? Dakota was so bad at it.” She laughs softly. “Every single one just plopped straight down. She got so frustrated.”
“She never gave up,” I say.
“She never does.” She shifts closer. “So determined. Even when she should let things go.”
I stretch my legs out, boots nearly touching the water’s edge. “Stubbornness runs in your family.”
“In some of us more than others.” She tucks her knees to her chest. “Do you think about before? How different things were?”
“No point.”
“Are you always this chatty, or am I special?” Her teasing tone carries an edge I can’t quite place.
“Got a lot on my mind.”
She rubs her arms. “It’s chilly out here.”
“We can head back. Or want me to get you a blanket?”
She opens her mouth, then closes it, gazing back out into the water. “No.”
We sit in silence, the lapping of water against the shore filling the space between us.
Should I get snacks for later when Dakota comes over? Maybe Ramirez has some cuffs lying around…