Chapter 37
The elevator reaches my floor and opens to Seph standing inside. He’s still wearing the suit and a stupid pink sash that has a glittered Prom King print on it.
Truly, the last person in the world I want to see.
“Hey,” he says, the sides of his eyes crinkling again as if everything in the world is fine. “Did something happen with Achi Jackie? I was gonna go to your unit to check on you.”
“Nothing,” I mutter, trying to bypass him to the elevator.
“Whoa, wait, wait. Ilagan, hold on.” He grabs my hand. “Talk to me.”
If I wasn’t so busy talking to Seph earlier, then I would’ve caught Pa leaving.
“You missed our crowning moment. Didn’t get to use my dancing skills since Julia and Sean took over.”
If I wasn’t so busy dancing with Seph, then I could’ve stopped Pa.
“I also didn’t have time to give you this…” Seph grabs something from his suit pocket and places what looks like a plastic egg in my other hand.
“It’s supposed to be a surprise,” he says, rubbing the back of his head. “Tried to be cute with the egg thing, like a reference to your scrambled eggs.”
If I wasn’t with Seph, Pa would still be here.
After I don’t say anything, he taps my wrist. “Hey, what’s going on?”
All words escape me when Seph stares at me like he’s so desperate to help. He always makes me feel that things will be all right. What if he can fix this whole situation with Pa’s ghost too?
But then my whole body tightens as I consider opening up to Seph about Pa. I drift back to the prom sash on his chest and everything that happened tonight. Being with Seph didn’t fix anything.
You just made everything worse for your whole family, again.
“Why did you even go to prom with me?” I almost spit out.
He looks at me like the answer’s obvious. “Because I like you.”
“Why?” I try to blink away the tears I feel coming.
“Hasn’t it been obvious over the past weeks?”
My shoulders bunch up. “I thought we were just having fun,” I manage to say despite my throat closing in on itself again. “Being one of your MOMOL buddies.”
Seph stops short. “How can we be MOMOL buddies when I have no idea what that means?” It all makes my vison blur with tears. Why is he still here?!
“Hey.” He dips his head so he meets my eyes. “I like you. Just you, okay? And I have a feeling from how it’s been going, I think you like me too.”
“… What if I don’t like you?” I ask under my breath. “Will you go away?”
The way his face falls makes my heart twist. It’s like a dozen eternities pass while we stand outside the elevator without saying a word.
Then I hear Seph say no.
“If that’s what you feel…,” his voice rasps out. “I’ll always be your friend, Nika. Your family has always been there for me and I’ll always be here for you.”
He doesn’t know what he’s saying. I’m so tired of people giving me false promises. I’m so tired of getting my hopes up. Everyone I care about always ends up leaving me.
So I go for where I know it’ll hurt.
“We’re only here because I feel sorry for you,” I blurt out. “That’s the only reason why I went along with the soiree, the prom … Your dad isn’t giving you any attention, so you’re desperate for anyone to notice you.”
My eyes prickle from seeing the look on Seph’s face. He doesn’t fight back or say anything else. He just untangles his hand from mine and watches as I step inside the elevator.
The elevator doors slide shut and it’s too late for me to take all those words back.