25. Kaitlyn
25
KAITLYN
C assie opened her door and gave me an exaggerated frown. “Oh, how I’ve missed your face.”
She held out her arms and I stepped into the hug, happy to see my sister in person for the first time in way too long.
“I’ve missed you too. I brought celebratory donuts.” When we finally let go, I held up the bakery box.
“Katie, no!” She looked like I was offering her sugar-dusted poison. “I have a stupid-tight white dress I need to fit into soon. Why are you trying to sabotage me?”
I laughed. “Please. With the amount you’re working out, you could probably eat all six of them without gaining an ounce. You look amazing.” I reached out and rubbed her toned arm, but I didn’t say anything about the hollows under her eyes. Wedding planning was definitely taking a toll on my sister.
“Thanks,” she replied looking glum. “Yeah, fine—gimme one of those please.”
We walked to the table near the sliding glass door. Cassandra’s apartment had an incredible view of the ocean, but in a few weeks, she’d be giving it up to move in with Scott. I thought it was adorable that they hadn’t moved in together right away once they got engaged, but she’d told me she wanted the act of joining their lives post-vows to feel momentous.
“So what’s going on? What are you stressing about today?”
“The frickin’ seating chart,” she wailed, pointing to a whiteboard propped up on an easel. “It’s like I’m setting up UN negotiations! I can’t put Scott’s Aunt Mary anywhere near his cousin Janet because there was an incident with Thanksgiving leftovers a million years ago they still fight about. And his Uncle Roger flirts with everyone, so I can’t put him near the bridesmaids or his wife will freak out. Add in a few raging alcoholics who need to be seated far away from the open bar, and half a dozen divorced folks who want to murder each other. At this point, I just want to draw names and put everyone wherever.”
I walked to the seating chart and studied it, realizing it was time to come clean about my surprise plus-one.
“Where is the bridal party’s table?”
Cassie walked over munching on a strawberry donut and jabbed a finger at a table. “Here. I’m letting everyone sit with their dates so it’s not awkward for the plus-ones who don’t know anyone. But then again, your plus-one is a way-back friend of Scott’s, so I could put him with the other frat brothers and he’d be fine. Although I have a feeling that he’ll try to James-ify the table no matter where I put him. Know what I mean? I can just picture him ordering special bottles of wine that aren’t on the menu and telling the waiter he served from the wrong side.”
She wasn’t wrong. I could totally see James trying to take over even when it wasn’t his event. But I needed to tell my sister James wasn’t my plus-one. I settled for a redirect as I worked up my nerve to spill the big news about my date. “True, but I think it’s hard for him to turn that part of his brain off. He knows how to show people a good time, and it’s not easy for him to be ‘just’ a guest.”
“Exactly. Control freak,” Cassie agreed, licking her fingers. “Has he made up with Jess yet?”
I shook my head. “Not that I can tell. He refuses to believe she’s capable of running a business.”
“Oh please,” Cassie scoffed. “She hooked me up with one of Henri’s designs for my ‘leaving the wedding’ dress and wait until you see it. Pale pink with a little sparkle, strapless—it’s jaw-dropping. Her business is going to do just fine.” She stared at me for a beat. “Eat a damn donut already! I’m getting ready for number two.”
I laughed and grabbed a jelly donut.
“How’s everything between you and James these days?” Cassie asked, eating nearly half of her blueberry cruller in a single bite.
“Good. Really good.” I couldn’t control my smile. “Key West was exactly what we needed. And Harper too. It was a big breakthrough for all of us.”
“Sounds like a cozy little family thing,” Cassie mused.
The mention of family made me realize I couldn’t put off my big confession any longer.
“Um, speaking of family…”
Cassie munched the donut and studied my face. “What? What’s wrong?”
I cleared my throat and shifted in my chair. “Nothing’s wrong. Everything is actually really great. But before I tell you what’s going on, I need you to promise you’ll let me talk without interrupting, okay?”
She narrowed her eyes at me. “Okay.” Cassie drew the word out, suspicion thick in her voice.
“My plus-one isn’t James—it’s Mom. I invited her.”
She froze as her face cycled through half a dozen expressions, none of them positive.
I rushed to keep talking. “She’s different now. I can hear it in her voice, and the things she says. She’s been working on herself—she’s really changed! And it feels amazing connecting with her. I actually look forward to talking to her, how weird is that?” I forced out a laugh to try to lighten the mood, but it seemed to have no impact on Cassie, who was staring at me with her mouth hanging open. “She’s really excited to rebuild her relationships with both of us. And it feels like a wedding celebration is a great place to start the process. She doesn’t want to miss your special day, Cass.”
She finally snapped her mouth shut. “ My special day,” she repeated.
“Yes, and I think it’s wonderful she’s going to be there!” I watched my sister closely as she tried to formulate a sentence. “She told me she’s so excited to see you and give you a hug.”
“You invited Mom…to my special day.”
I nodded wordlessly, now fully aware how the conversation was going to go. I could feel beads of perspiration forming along my hairline.
“How dare you?” Cassie whispered. The fury in her tone was unmistakable. “How dare you invite that woman?”
“That woman is our mother,” I shot back.
Cassie pounced on me before the words were out of my mouth. “Only by blood. Because there’s nothing maternal about a person who throws a child out the door to fend for herself! I was still in high school when she kicked me out, Katie! Do you have any idea how much that hurt?”
Cassie knew I did, because I was there to pick up the pieces with her. I was the one who stepped up to take care of my sister when our own mother refused to.
She was up and pacing now. “Why didn’t you ask me first?”
“Because I knew you’d respond like this! You completely shut down when it comes to Mom. You’re not even open to a conversation with her.”
“Why should I be?” she shouted back. “She reached out to you, but I haven’t heard a peep from her. She doesn’t give a shit about me! Never did.”
“I’m the oldest, and she asked me to talk to you,” I said gently. “I’m the peacemaker, she knows that.”
Cassie barked out a laugh. “Oh, you’re the peacemaker? So what does that make me?”
“Hurt,” I said simply, and Cassie’s face shifted from anger to sadness for a moment. “As you should be. But now things are going to change. We can turn everything around and be a family again, Cassie.”
She paced around the room like she was looking for an escape. “So you invite her to the biggest, most important, most stressful day of my life so far. And you expected me to smile and make nice to that woman when I haven’t even laid eyes on her in years? Like all is forgiven?”
“No, not at all. I was thinking we could all meet for a coffee date in the next week or so. That way you’d see how different she is. Then, we can all be together at the wedding without any awkwardness. I promise you, this is a really positive step for our family.”
She came to a stop and stared out toward the water. I crossed my fingers so tightly that I cut off my circulation.
Cassie turned back to me slowly. “No.”
“No what? No coffee? Because we could meet for dinner and really hash things out?—”
“No to all of it. No to coffee, no to dinner, and no to Mom coming to my wedding.”
“But Cassie,” I protested. “I already invited her.”
She held my gaze for a beat. “And no to you ,” she hissed.
We both went silent as I tried to figure out what she meant.
Cassie crossed her arms and started talking. “You pulling a stunt like that means I can’t trust you. Hell, at this point I feel like I don’t even know you. And I no longer feel comfortable having you at my wedding.”
Panic rose inside of me. “Hold on, wait. Are you saying you’re disinviting me?”
“That’s exactly what I’m saying.” She sniffled, blinking back hot, angry tears before they could fall.
“You can’t be serious. All because of Mom?” Heavy dread spread through me as I realized she meant it.
“No, because of you. Because you went behind my back and invited her. It’s not just her, it’s that you didn’t consider my feelings about it. How could you do that to me? Like I need more stress in my life right now.”
“Cassie, I swear, it’s for the best! We can be a family, a real family?—”
She threw back her head and let out a joyless laugh. “Not a chance in hell. She’s bamboozling you and I don’t know why you can’t see it. What’s gotten into you?”
There was no way I was going to admit to her that the Morris family was a big part of the reason why I was willing to try again. I shrugged helplessly. “I’m thinking about the future. Don’t you want your children to know their grandmother?”
“That’s my decision,” she smacked her chest for emphasis. “Not yours.”
We went silent again, and I fought back my own tears. “So you don’t want me to be your maid of honor?”
She shook her head.
“You’re serious?”
“How many times do I have to say that I don’t trust you, Kaitlyn?” Her words reverberated around the room. “I’ll pay you back for your expenses so far. You can ship the dress to me.”
I couldn’t hold the tears back any longer. “I was just trying to help. To set things right between us. Why are you punishing me?”
“Because I can’t believe you’d choose her over me. It was supposed to be us against the world.” The tears had come at last. They were rolling down her cheeks, and all I wanted to do was run over and hug her—but I knew better than to try.
“Cassie…”
“I think you should leave now.” She walked to the window and refused to look at me.
I left quickly and waited until I was in my car to allow the floodgates to open. I let out all of the pain and confusion I was feeling until I was ready to reach out to the only person who would understand my anguish. I picked up my phone and dialed.
“Mom? I need to talk to you.”