Chapter 7 The chance to miss you
Gabe hadn’t told her anything about his conversation with Rabbi Daniel. When his meeting finished after almost an hour, he smiled and said it was “a very interesting conversation.” Savannah didn’t pry, and Leah didn’t feel comfortable asking any questions in front of her mother.
So the three of them went to lunch and then Leah and Gabe were back on the train to the city. Leah badly wanted to know what he and Rabbi Daniel talked about. But she was also afraid to know the answer because she was sure that Rabbi Daniel would be against her marrying a Christian, an Italian Catholic at that.
“What are you thinking about?” she asked Gabe on the train when she noticed him staring out the window instead of at his book.
“A lot of things,” he responded.
“Anything you want to tell me about?”
He shook his head.
“Is it about what you talked to Rabbi Daniel about?” She asked. She was becoming desperate for information.
“A little bit,” he admitted. “It was a good talk. I’m glad we spoke.”
“Really?” Leah wasn’t sure if that should cause relief or not.
“Yeah,” he said and that was the end of the conversation. They got back to Manhattan and took the subway to their apartment and Gabe immediately went into the bedroom and started packing a bag.
“Are you really going to leave?” Leah asked, standing in the bedroom doorway. She was afraid that if he walked out, that might be the end. Was their relationship really this fragile? That it could break just because of a few tough questions?
“I think it would be a good idea for us to have some space,” he said. “It’s not a break. I’m not leaving you. I just think we can both think more clearly if we aren’t next to each other.”
“What about texting? Or talking on the phone?” Leah asked. Who would she tell when something happened at work? Who would she ask how they were doing during the day?
“I think we shouldn’t talk for a couple of days,” he said. “How about this, we’ll meet on Wednesday for a really romantic dinner at a great restaurant and we can talk about everything.”
“Wednesday?” That was so far away! They spent every evening together! Usually ate dinner together even when dinner was Cheerios. She wasn’t sure if she could still sleep without his body next to hers.
“It’s good to miss each other sometimes,” he said. “I want the chance to miss you.” He zipped up a duffel bag and flung it on his shoulder.
“Where are you going to stay?” she asked.
“At one of the company apartments,” he said. His hedge fund owned multiple luxury apartments throughout the city. They used them to impress investors, and also, Gabe alleged, for extracurricular activities that wives and girlfriends wouldn’t approve of. Leah had been in one of the apartments once, to watch the Christmas tree lighting at Rockefeller Center. It was right at the beginning of their relationship and Gabe brought her there for an amazing view of the tree.
“I hope there won’t be any extracurriculars for you!” she said in a joking tone. She trusted Gabe, but no matter how much any woman trusts her man, there is always fear.
“Don’t you worry, I’ll just go to work, come home, go running, and sit around missing you. And thinking, of course,” he said. He dropped the duffel bag and wrapped his arms around Leah. “You know I love you, right?”
She nodded. “I just thought that love would be enough.” She let herself melt into his arms and he kissed her forehead. She lifted her head and met his lips with hers. They pressed against each other, kissing deeply until Leah knew it was time to pull away.
“Wednesday dinner,” Gabe said as he walked out the door. She nodded and waited for the door to click shut before she plopped down on their couch. She wasn’t sure what to do with herself in the apartment alone. She’d never lived alone before. She’d always had Shira when she was a kid and then in college she always lived in a dorm or with a roommate. She’d had a roommate in New York until she moved in with Gabe. Living alone never had any appeal to her, it sounded sad and lonely to come home to an empty apartment without anyone to watch TV with or debate about ordering takeout.
She turned on the TV and started watching a reality show that Gabe never would have agreed to. Then she debated with herself if she should order takeout for dinner and the side of her that wanted Thai food won out and she ordered way too much food for one person.
While she sat and watched trashy TV and stuffed her face with pad see ew and basil chicken, she picked up her phone and texted Shira.
How are you feeling?
They hadn’t talked about Shira’s pregnancy since her confession that evening. That night, Shira wasn’t sure what she wanted to do—whether she wanted to keep the baby and if so, how and when she would tell their parents. And then, if she did keep the baby, what she would do, how she would raise it.
Leah didn’t know much about the guy Shira had been seeing. It was still new and even he didn’t know that Shira was expecting and Shira wasn’t sure she even needed to tell him.
I think I am experiencing what everyone calls morning sickness in the evening. The return text came.
Oh no! Are you OK? Leah texted back immediately.
Ugh was all Shira responded.
Do you want to come stay with me in the city for a few days? Leah asked. It seemed like a great option. Leah didn’t want to be alone, and Shira was home with their parents who didn’t know about her pregnancy.
OMG YES! I’m getting on the next train! As soon as I finish vomiting.
Leah cringed a little. Maybe she didn’t want her vomiting sister to stay with her. But morning sickness couldn’t be all day, even if it showed up in the evening, right? Leah was happy to have her sister stay with her. They could discuss each other’s issues and figure everything out together. That’s what sisters were for!
Leah cleaned up her takeout, putting the leftovers in the fridge in case Shira was hungry after her session of vomiting and continued watching trashy TV much later than she should have on a Sunday evening when she had work the next day.