CHAPTER SIX
HEIDI
It's a week before I see Griffen again.
He's sitting at a table with three other women, helping one knit a scarf by holding a ball of yarn for her. It's freaking adorable, and I would love to snap a picture, but I don't think that would go over too well.
“You're staring again. Why don't you go over and talk to him?” Greta bumps my shoulder with hers.
“That's enough from you,” I scold. “You did your part, and now it's up to him.”
“It's the twenty-first century. You don't have to wait for the man to come to you. Look at how I got Don. You think I was waiting around for him to approach me?” An amused cackle rocks her slim form. “Hardly. Men need a push.”
“And that man?” She points to Griffen as if he can't see her gesturing to him from across the room. “Needs more of a push than others. Griffen's always been a sweetheart, but he's also shy. He needs a little help, and that's where you come in.”
“That is not where I come in,” I retort.
Even if I were brave enough to approach Griffen, I'm not sure what I'd say. No way my courage extends to asking him out on a date.
As if sensing we're talking about him, Griffen looks up from the knitting and catches my eye. I smile and wave, but he quickly ducks his head with a frown, pretending he didn't see me.
Ouch.
Thankfully, Greta didn't catch the exchange. I'd hate to know what she would do then.
Actually, I hate what my body is starting to do now as tears well in my eyes.
“Um, didn't you say you forgot your glasses back in the sewing room? Let me grab those for you.”
“Oh, you don't…”
I'm gone before Greta can finish her protest. I need a minute alone, and the empty sewing room, which is closed at this time of day, is the perfect escape.
The door closes with a click behind me, and I sigh in relief as tears fall down my cheeks. I can't believe he ignored me like that.
Just pretended that I didn't exist.
It's not like I expect him to declare his undying love for me. A brief acknowledgement, a hello, wouldn't give me the wrong impression, but apparently, even that is too much for him.
A shuddery breath rattles from my lungs. Sniffling, I swipe at the tears, annoyed with myself.
“I shouldn't be crying over a man,” I say out loud, as if that'll make a difference—reprimanding myself for my own feelings.
The sound of the door opening and closing echoes in the room. Spinning around, my watery gaze meets Griffen's.
“What are you doing here?”
Why did he follow me? Isn't it enough that he ignored me? Now he wants to catch me crying over his rejection?
“I came to apologize.” The toe of his boot scuffs at the floor as he runs a hand through his wavy hair.
“For what?”
“For being an ass out there. I don't know what I was think—”
“I can tell you what you were thinking,” I interrupt, pain in my voice. “There's that girl I was forced to have a fake date with. The one I was hoping to never see again.”
Maybe that's dramatic, but I'm feeling dramatic after the past ten minutes.
“What? No. I loved our date. Our real date,” he emphasizes. “But it can't go anywhere. I can't date anyone.”
“What? Why? Do you already have a girlfriend?”
“No.”
“A boyfriend?” Maybe that explains why Greta said she's never heard of him being romantically involved with a woman.
“No.”
“You've secretly become a monk and taken a vow of celibacy?
Griffen chuckles and leans against the wall, resting his head against the exposed brick. “Nope, although that sounds less humiliating than the truth.”
“Try me,” I say, crossing my arms over my chest, intensely curious about his reasons.
“You may have noticed that I'm big.” He gestures to his large stature, and my eyes take the opportunity to scan his body appreciatively.
“Yeah,” I say slowly. What's his size have to do with anything?
Honestly, it should be a plus.
Who doesn't want a tall, bear-like man who can wrap you in his burly arms to keep you warm at night?
I know I sure as hell do.
He swallows hard, his Adam's apple bobbing in his throat.
“Well, at my high school prom,” he says derisively, “Susie Baker and I decided we'd lose our virginities to each other.”
Not where I was expecting this to go, but okay.
“Except we didn't get that far. She started laughing after she saw my dick. Called me a ‘freak.’ Alluded to my size being the problem. I vowed from then on that I would never try again. I don't want to hurt anyone, and I don't want to be ridiculed. My body isn’t made for that kind of intimacy.”
“Bullshit.”
“Excuse me?”
Maybe I shouldn't have said that out loud, but come on, I've read the books. Seen some quality erotic films.
I know it can work.
“You're not too big, Griffen. You were inexperienced, and so was Susie. The first time can be scary for a lot of girls, and if you are proportionate…” My gaze drops down to his groin.
“Like I assume you are, then it makes sense that she overreacted.
That doesn't excuse her cruelty, though, or mean you should give up forever.
You're not a freak. You deserve love and happiness.”
“Heidi, I appreciate what you are—”
“Stop.” I step closer, put my hands on his shoulders for leverage, then haul myself to my tiptoes. “You're not a freak,” I repeat in a whisper, then slam my mouth over his, stealing the protest from his lips.
Griffen can argue all he wants, but he's not going to dissuade me.
If what's stopping him from giving me a chance is fear, not disinterest, then I am perfectly fine proving there's nothing wrong, or freakish, about him.
It seems I'm the one with a bit of experience in this arena, and it gives me just enough courage to take what I want.
First?
A kiss from my sweet, but clueless mountain man.