Chapter 30
Savannah
I feel like a stalker. Standing here, barely awake, yet totally captivated by the sight in front of me. Leaning against the doorframe, I feel content for the first time in a long time.
“This here are the plans. See that?” Griffin points to something on his laptop screen.
“That’s where the pool will go, right up against that giant rock. It’s called a boulder.” He continues, talking to my son like he’s a grown boy, not the mere baby that’s cuddled on his naked chest.
“Now, boulders in that area are common. So we’re going to incorporate it into the build and utilize it as a waterfall feature. Pretty cool, huh?” Griffin smiles as he kisses the top of Tommy's head, my son clearly fed by the look of the empty bottle on the countertop nearby.
Seeing Griffin like this does something to my chest. Warmth spreads through me at how much love my son has and how much this man does for me.
We’ve fallen into a routine of sorts. Griffin lets me sleep a little longer in the mornings, and he gets up, grabs Tommy, and feeds him a bottle.
The morning routine we now have is one that works for all of us.
Griffin’s a natural. His large hand holds Tommy securely to him. Tommy is content, warm, and safe. Seeing the two of them together makes me think of how far we’ve all come. Griffin’s parenting skills are getting better with every passing day. Mine too.
“Good morning…” I walk into the room, pretending I didn’t watch their entire conversation.
“Mornin’, sweetness.”
I step over to him, kissing my son before I kiss Griffin. His free hand wraps around my middle, the t-shirt I’m wearing lifting a little as his palm settles on my ass and he pulls me close.
“You teaching Tommy how to build?” I grin, and Griffin’s eyes sparkle.
“You creeping up on us again?”
I blush a little a being caught. “I wasn’t creeping…” I tease as his hand squeezes my butt cheek.
“Don’t think I don’t see you standing over there at the doorway, watching us each morning.”
“You knew I was there?” I pull back, shocked. “I thought I was so quiet.” I roll my lips as I step away from them, wanting to start breakfast.
“I always know where you are.” He looks at me over the top of the coffee mug as he takes a sip.
“Eggs today?” I grab a pan and the eggs, ready to start a scramble.
“You know you don’t need to make me breakfast.”
“I know, but I like to.” I like to be kept busy, otherwise my mind wanders too much. I haven’t heard from my family, which unsettles me. They would all know about Tommy by now, that I’m one hundred percent sure of. But since I haven’t seen or heard from them, I feel like something is brewing.
“I left you the crossword today.”
I look over at him and smile as he pushes the newspaper my way. We’ve been taking turns to do the daily crossword, and on the weekends, we do it together.
“A man after my own heart.”
“Mmmmm, you in that t-shirt is killing mine,” he mumbles, and I look down at myself.
“My hair is a mess, I barely slept, and I’m pretty sure I leaked milk on this t-shirt of yours at some point last night,” I scoff playfully as I plate our eggs.
“Your breasts are…” He raises his eyebrows and looks right at my chest.
“Out of control. I had no idea this was going to happen when my milk came in, but here we are. About three sizes bigger than normal.” I throw up my hands in mock exasperation.
“Three sizes bigger, huh?” He smirks. “Tragedy.” Then he taps the counter beside him. “Come eat, sweetness. Before you run off to feed the whole town.”
“Melissa is opening again today, so that helps.” She’s been a godsend, helping with not only the bakery, but with Tommy as well, nearly every day. I was surprised she doesn’t have children with how wonderful she is with him.
I take a seat on the stool next to Griffin and look at the wall clock, knowing the bakery will already be open and some of the pastries I made late last night will sell this morning before I get there and make fresh products.
“Go easy. Tommy is only a few weeks old, and you’re still healing too.” Griffin watches me carefully, concern pinching his brow.
“I know. I feel good, though, and I want to take advantage of that. Besides the lack of sleep and the outrageous milk supply.” I grab my chest, knowing I need to express soon. They’re feeling fuller and heavier than ever this morning.
“Again… such a tragedy…” Griffin clicks his tongue in jest, and I laugh.
“Stop it.” I throw a piece of toast at him. “Here, let’s look at this.” Grabbing the newspaper, I scan the crossword.
“Four-letter word for cereal’s usual companion…”
“Milk,” Griffin says quickly, beating me to the answer. I write the word down and move to the next one as he takes another sip of his coffee.
“Parts of a chest that aren’t drawers…” I murmur, frowning. Thinking of the chest of drawers in the room upstairs, wondering what it could be.
“Breasts,” Griffin says immediately, and I sit up.
“Oh, you can’t be serious…” I look back at the crossword, and sure enough, it fits.
“Is the universe trying to tell me something today?” I write down his answer, grinning, a giggle fluttering past my lips.
“That you’re perfect… and you have fantastic breasts.”
I pause and look at Griffin, who watches me intently, my son peacefully resting on his chest.
“You’re full of compliments this morning,” I tease, shaking my head as I bite my lip.
He nods, leaning back a little and sighing contentedly. “I like it.”
“Like it?”
“Like you in my home. Like you in my bed. Like you in my life. I like it all… a lot.”
“I like it a lot too…” I tell him honestly, wanting to say so much more but hesitating.
“Probably should’ve taken you out on a few dates before I brought you home and made you mine…” He looks a little remorseful.
“I don’t need fancy dinners or flowers. I think what we have together is perfect.”
Swallowing roughly, he looks down at Tommy before bringing his gaze back to mine. “I don’t want it to change. You. Me. Tommy. Together.”
“Well, by the look of Tommy, he isn’t going anywhere…”
He smiles, his big hand gently rubbing Tommy’s back as he sleeps.
“Is Tommy preventing you from starting your day today?” I ask, wondering what he’s up to.
“I’ll take you both to the bakery this morning, then work from my home office for the rest of the day. I have a few things to iron out on the Colorado project.”
“The boulder?” I ask, and he chuckles.
“See, you were creeping…” His grin widens, and I love the look of it.
“Fine. I was creeping. Happy now?” I slip off the stool where I was sitting to start packing up from breakfast.
“The happiest I’ve been in a long time, sweetness. Maybe even ever,” he says, pulling me close, the three of us cuddling before Tommy starts to squirm.
Griffin presses a kiss to Tommy’s head, and something in my chest aches with how badly I want this life to stay untouched.
I sit in the darkness, the little nightlight my only light, feeding Tommy. I’m tired. I had a big day at the bakery, and my nights of broken sleep are wearing me a little thin. It’s almost hard to keep my eyes open in this soft cozy rocker Griffin got me.
“Hey, sweetness…” Griffin says softly as he walks in. He does most nights. It doesn’t matter if it’s two a.m. or four a.m., he’s always here. He steps up to me, kissing me quickly, and places a glass of water on my side table before he sits on the footstool and grabs my feet.
“You don’t have to get up for every feed, you know.” I grin, secretly loving these quiet nights we have together. We’ve grown closer because of it. Shared more together than I think either of us have ever before.
Griffin hasn’t left our side. He works from home but had one day last week when he flew from Whispers to Colorado and back in less than twelve hours.
Spending more time in the air than he did on the ground, but he was adamant he was checking on his crew and signing off on a few things, then would be back in time to pick us up from the bakery. Which he was.
My feelings for him have expanded. Our story isn’t one that’s followed a traditional path.
In fact, we’re so far off from tradition it's almost comical.
Young pregnant woman, grumpy older builder.
Friends before we became friends with benefits to help the baby along, and then a birthing partner.
To now acting like new parents and living together.
“Hmmm, you do, so I will too.” He’s so matter-of-fact; I know there’s no way to stop him.
“Did you sleep much?” Griffin’s night terrors don’t seem to happen that often anymore.
Perhaps because we’re being woken almost every three hours, or maybe it’s not being in his bed alone anymore, or maybe because he sleeps with my gran’s Bible under his pillow. Either way, something has helped him.
“A little.” He rubs my feet, the feeling of his large, warm hands relaxing me more than I ever thought it could. I’m so not used to treatment like this. He spoils me daily with his affection, and I’ll never tire of it.
“That feels so good…” I moan, feeling the release of any stress and anxiety.
“I love your little moans, sweetness.” The hungry way he says it has my eyes opening to look at him.
We haven’t had sex since the night we brought on labor.
But right now, there’s heat in his gaze that I feel wash over me like I haven’t felt since then.
My body isn’t recovered yet, though. There’s nothing we can do without the approval from the doctor.
But we both want to. I feel it in the way he caresses me in bed at night before we fall asleep.
How he kisses me first thing in the morning.
I feel it in the way his hands linger on me when he drops Tommy and me off at the bakery, like he doesn’t want to leave.
How he looks at me like I’m the most beautiful woman he’s ever seen, even when I’m a complete mess most of the time lately.
“You do?” I offer a soft smile as my body continues to melt at his touch.
“Oh, yes, baby, I do…” His voice is a rumble, one that vibrates around the room. Griffin’s hands slow their movements on my feet, his thumbs pressing just enough to make me sigh again.
“You keep making those sounds,” he murmurs, quirking his eyebrow at me “and I’m gonna forget we’re on doctor’s orders.”
I glance down at Tommy, still latched to my breast, blissfully unaware. “You wouldn’t dare.”
His eyes flick to mine, dark and amused by my teasing. “Sweetness, I’ve been daring since the day I met you.”
I shift slightly in the rocker, tired yet unbelievably turned on, the movement subtle, but his gaze tracks it like it’s seismic. He knows me all too well.
“You need sleep,” I mock, in disbelief that he’s wanting me now with the way I look.
He leans in, voice low. “I need you.”
My breath catches. The air between us thickens. His hand slides up my calf, slow and deliberate, massaging my muscles and stopping just below my knee.
“A few more weeks…” I tell him, trying to tamp down the way my core aches for him. Knowing that I have a follow-up visit with Hudson at the six-week mark. Hopefully, we’ll get the all-clear.
“I would wait a lifetime…” he whispers, as Tommy cries a little, and our moment is broken.
For now.