18
Will would have liked to handle Gabriel’s rejection calmly. But he knew that wasn’t going to happen. He kept his eyes fixed on the floor and stumbled into students heading home from study in his rush to the bathroom. He didn’t even care that there were people in there already. He didn’t even close the stall door. He was on his knees and heaving over the bowl, unable to stop himself.
Throwing up was an awful stress response. On top of everything else, now his mouth tasted horrible and the acid was stinging his throat.
“Here.”
Will wiped his mouth and turned. Dune was offering him a bottle of water. He took it, croaking out a thanks, and half-collapsed against the wall of the enclosed stall. It wasn’t the first time he’d thrown up at school. But it was the first time anyone had seen him.
Dune sat next to him. “One of the guys said you were sick,” he told him. “Can I get you anything?”
“Water’s enough, thanks.” Will laid his head back and closed his eyes. He tried not to think, but all that was swimming in his mind was everything he’d shared with Gabriel. The way his body had buzzed when they were alone. How excited he got just from talking… Will had never pursued anyone like that before. He’d never been so forward with what he wanted—and it made the ache in his chest that much worse. How could he pretend that it didn’t bother him when he’d begged Gabriel to keep talking to him?
“Are you falling asleep?” Dune asked.
“No.” He nursed the bottle of water. It soothed the stinging in his throat.
“Do you want me to drive you home?”
Will didn’t want to be that guy. The one who couldn’t hold it together after getting turned down. Sinking down, he rested his head on Dune’s shoulder. Not cool, he knew, given Dune had been telling him about his feelings only an hour ago, but Will wasn’t holding it together. He felt like he needed someone to help him do that because it was impossible alone.
“I might pass out,” Will admitted, his eyelids too heavy to keep open.
“Coach,” Dune said, his body shifting away from Will.
“Boys,” Coach sighed. “You doing okay, Simmons?”
“Not really, sir,” Will answered.
“I’ll call your parents,” Coach said. “Dune, wait with him.”
“Sir.”
Dune wrapped his arm around Will’s waist to help keep him upright. With his hand against his ribs, Will felt self-conscious. But pulling away now would be awkward, wouldn’t it? Just as he put his arm around him? He squeezed his eyes shut. God, what was he even thinking? Why is that what he was worrying about right now? “Captain, not even my thoughts are coherent.” Will muttered, “How do I fix that?”
“Suck me.”
Will jerked away from Dune, his eyes flashing open. As he stared at Dune, aghast, his captain’s cheeks went crimson. Dune’s head snapped toward the stall door, out into the bathroom. “ James ,” He growled.
James laughed on his way out.
Will settled. Oh. There’s no way Dune would ever say anything like that. His nerves relaxed and he let out a tired chuckle.
“I’m going to kick his ass,” Dune said seriously.
Will smiled as he stood up. He was stiff. “Don’t tell him he made me laugh. It will go straight to his ego.”
“You’re not coherent, it doesn’t count.” Dune retrieved his bag. “Come on, let’s go wait by the front office.”
*
His dad picked him up. Will felt childish the closer he got to home, feeling as if he were running away from Gabriel. He hoped Gabriel didn’t know he’d thrown up since he’d know that he was the reason. Or maybe he did want him to know he made Will feel bad? No. Will dismissed that idea. He didn’t want Gabriel to find him childish.
Will covered his face with a groan. What was the point in worrying about Gabriel seeing him as an adult? He’d drawn the line between them. He’d put up the boundaries, and Will was out. Rationally, it was for the best. It would only end in trouble if the two of them got involved. He opened the messages on his phone. The steady stream of conversation that hadn’t stopped in two weeks shone up at him. Will sort of felt they already were involved.
“You’ll be back on your feet in no time,” Dad reassured him. Thankfully, he seemed sober. “It’s good you’re coming home early.”
“Why is it good?” Will straightened, closing the messages. Gabriel’s number was still there. And Will had already decided that he wouldn’t delete it. If Gabriel asked, he could just say he had.
Dad shrugged. “We need to sort everything out.”
When they reached home, Will came in to find Leah and Mom at the kitchen table with sheets spread out around them. His mom didn’t acknowledge Will, but Leah gave him a half-smile when he walked in. Neither asked why he’d come home from school early.
“Take a seat.” Dad pulled out a chair for him then sat in the next one over. He put one arm on the table and regarded Mom with an annoyed expression. “Let’s get on with it.”
Will tilted his head to read the forms. “Get on with what, exactly?”
“Splitting everything up,” Leah answered. She looked paler than usual, and there were dark circles under her eyes.
Will frowned. “Do you feel okay?”
Leah wasn’t even wearing make-up, and she rarely left her room without it. Despite that, she was dressed as if she were going somewhere formal. Was it so serious that she needed to dress up at their kitchen table?
“You don’t exactly look like a hundred bucks either,” Leah said pointedly.
Will bet he didn’t.
“I’m keeping the car,” Mom said.
“The house is mine,” Dad replied immediately. “It belonged to my mother, and it’s staying in my family.”
Mom glared at him, but she didn’t dispute it. That had to mean she was already willing to give up the place. “You’ll lose the house in half a year with your income,” she said coldly.
Will tensed. He looked at Leah, but the remark didn’t seem to bother her. Instead, she stared impassively at Dad, waiting for his response. And Dad was angry. Will could feel how wound up he was.
“No matter what happens, it will be no business of yours,” his dad said through a clenched jaw. “Will stays here.”
His mom snorted. “Obviously.”
*
Will stared at his mom. They were still talking, exchanging blows, but Will wasn’t following anymore. He turned, wide-eyed to Leah, and she stared back with the same impassive look she’d given Dad.
“Wait,” Will got out in a strangled tone, looking at his mom, “you’re leaving me?”
The look his mom gave him wasn’t friendly, but at least Leah looked perturbed enough to bite her lip.
Dad patted his shoulder. “We’ll finally get to relax for once.”
“Mom,” Will shook his dad away. “You’re serious? You’re moving away? And—”
“Grow up.” His mom interrupted coldly. “You’re too old to behave this way. It stopped being cute a long time ago.”
Will flinched at her tone. So cold. So uncaring. Not a hint of any affection at all. Will would be alone. Dad was absent—even if he was here physically, it was never mentally—and even if his mom was hard on him, at least she noticed when he didn’t come home. She noticed when his grades dipped. She noticed when he was pushing himself too hard. With Gabriel’s rejection fresh on his mind and his own guilt isolating him from his friends, her loss was too much. His voice cracked as he pleaded, “ Mom .”
Leah’s lip trembled. She quickly left the kitchen, wiping away the tears in her eyes.
His mom was no longer the picture of indifference. Her pinched features were twisting, clearly upset, and she had this pained look when she opened her mouth to talk. “It’s Maddy. Dear god, just call me Maddy.”