27
“Gale and Eileen are going to get married,” Cassie told Will as they walked down the shop isles.
“Oh yeah?” Will asked.
“Oh yeah.” She picked up a bunch of bananas and placed them into the trolley. After a few trips together, she had his grocery list memorised and happily plucked the ingredients off the shelves as Will walked the trolley after her.
“I can imagine Eileen running off to elope,” Will said. “But Gale’s too sensible.”
“Eileen brings the insensible out of him,” Cassie insisted. “And I heard from a little birdy he’s not the only one who has been walking on the wild side.” She gave Will a pointed look. He stopped walking, his heart rate suddenly spiking.
“Geez, don’t look so scared.” Cassie lightly hit his arm. “I’m not going to run off and tell Dune you’re with someone else, although he’d be okay with it—he’s kind of accepted that you two aren’t going anywhere.”
Will was stuck on two things. A) Dune told Cassie about that? And B) why the hell does she think he’s with someone? A torrent of fears raced through him; what if someone had seen him and Gabriel together? What if they reported it to the police? What if the police arrested him?
“Cassie…”
“Gale said you went home with someone the other week,” Cassie revealed.
Will let out a relieved breath and relaxed. That’s right. He’d told Gale he got home with someone else. But Gale had no idea who that someone was. “Did he?”
“And,” Cassie nodded to his neck. “Obviously it wasn’t a one-time thing.”
Will covered the hickey. His cheeks got hot as he realised that everyone at school had probably seen it. But it wasn’t in a place he could hide it with his shirt collar, and if he tried to cover it up now, it would only make him look guiltier. It occurred to him that Gabriel must have seen it. He wondered what Gabriel had thought when he saw the mark. Regret? Guilt? Or was he remembering the kiss that day? Was he thinking about how he’d gotten jealous when Will gave someone else his phone number?
“Are you okay?” Cassie interrupted his thoughts.
“Yeah, sorry.”
“You’re kind of out of it today,” Cassie observed. The worried look from class came back. She held onto the edge of his trolley and did a full circle, glancing through the empty isles. Then she turned back to him. “I know we don’t really know each other that well, but if you want to talk, I’m all ears,” she said gently. “Or if you don’t want to talk and just want to hang out, I can free myself up any day. And you know Dune’s always willing to listen.”
It surprised Will that her offer made him feel lighter. “Thanks, Cassie.”
Cassie stepped back and smiled. “No problem. I just need to get the ice cream and I’m ready.”
Will double-checked he had everything needed for lunch this week before making his way toward the tills. Only one of them was open, and there was only one man loading his groceries onto the belt. He stopped. Gabriel’s broad back was to him, and he was too busy to have noticed him. As much as Will longed to talk to him, he knew Gabriel wouldn’t respond the way he wanted. And he didn’t know if he could handle being treated indifferently by Gabriel. Like he was nothing more than his student. Even though that’s all he was now.
“Hello, sir,” Cassie chirped, striding past Will to claim the spot beside Gabriel.
Gabriel turned to her. “Cassie.” After he’d acknowledged her, his gaze slid past her, scanning the store until his eyes landed on Will. “Will,” he greeted in the same tone.
Will couldn’t just keep standing there. He dropped his gaze to the food in his cart. “Sir.” The word was like acid on his tongue. And suddenly the hollowness wasn’t enough to keep the tears at bay. They burned the back of his eyes trying to get out. He focused on breathing normally as he unloaded his cart. Cassie and Gabriel’s voices were background noise to the buzzing in his ears.
“Your father told me you got recruited for the national team. Good job,” the shopkeeper said as Will stepped up to pay. He looked around, disorientated. Gabriel was over at the bag-packing area with his back to them. Cassie was putting Will’s things into a bag, and the look she gave him was seriously concerned.
Will turned back to the woman. She was still waiting for him to answer. “Yeah, I did.” He offered as much of a smile as he could muster. “Thank you.”
“It’s eighteen-twenty.” She turned the card machine around to him. “When do you have your first match?”
“It’ll be a few days after the new year.” Will pressed his card against the screen. “I don’t know if I’ll get to play or if I’ll just be subbing.” The machine beeped.
“Sometimes tap doesn’t work, you can pop it in.” The shopkeeper nodded to the bottom of the machine.
“Dune was telling me you have to go all the way to Dublin for the trainings,” Cassie joined in. “That’s a two-hour drive, isn’t it?”
“It would be two hours by bus,” Will said. “Less by car.” The machine let out another beep. He looked at the lady. “I’m not sure what happened. The pin prompt didn’t come up.”
She pulled the machine back to her and pressed a few buttons. “The card’s been cancelled.”
Will turned over the bank card. It was his. “I haven’t cancelled it…” he trailed off, confused.
“Give your bank a ring, sweetie. I’m sure it’s nothing serious.”
Will put it into his pocket and opened his wallet. He’d spent the last of his cash on petrol. “I’m sorry, I, uh, I’ll have to leave the groceries here.” He got horribly warm as he put the wallet back into his pocket. There were people in line now. Two women who had their shopping loaded out and were waiting for their turn. Behind them was a family. Behind the family was a man in a suit. Not to mention that Cassie was next to him. They were all staring at him.
“I’m sorry, Will. I’d lend you the money, but I don’t have anything on me,” Cassie said, upset. Her eyes flicked self-consciously to their audience.
“Here.” Gabriel leaned over Will’s shoulder and tapped his card against the machine. It beeped, and the receipt printed.
Gabriel’s hand pressed against his lower back, warm and firm. The lavender smell that was always present in his house clung to his clothes and Will breathed the scent in. He clenched his fists to stop himself from leaning into Gabriel. “I’ll bring in the money tomorrow,” Will’s voice came out, uneven. “Thank you.”
Gabriel tilted his head down toward him. His eyes were warm. “Don’t worry about it,” he said, low enough that only Will could hear him. He looked as though he would say something else. Instead, he stepped away. The smile he gave them was distant. “See you two in study tomorrow.”
Will watched Gabriel’s back retreating. One of the women behind him cleared her throat, and he moved out of their way with an apology. He went to Cassie to get his bag. She didn’t seem to notice that Will had been staring at Gabriel because she was doing the same. “Talk about a knight in shining armour,” Cassie said. “He definitely has a soft spot for you.”
“I’m sure he’d have done that for any of his students.” Will kept his face away from Cassie as he spoke. He was trying to keep his voice neutral, but he knew it wasn’t. He knew if anyone was listening closely, they’d hear it was still uneven. They walked out to the car together, Will caught up in his thoughts. The spot where Gabriel touched him was still warm. The little spot where he’d felt Gabriel’s breath on his ear was still warm. He bit the inside of his cheek so hard it drew blood. He had it bad.
“He wouldn’t do it for Michael,” Cassie pointed out.
“Just because he’s strict in study, doesn’t mean he’d watch a student embarrass themselves.” Will tossed his groceries into the back seat. He had his door opened before noticing that Cassie had stopped walking. He gripped the edge of the door and let the sharp edges of it press painfully against his palms to help get a hold of himself. He looked at the ground. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to snap.”
“It’s okay.”
Will did his best to make conversation on the way home, but the air between them was strained. Cassie’s replies were slower than they usually would be, and she’d lost her enthusiasm. They pulled up outside her house and Cassie hopped out. “Thanks for letting me tag along again. And I mean what I said, okay? If you need to talk, I’m here.”
*
Stepping into his house and inhaling the scent of beer and alcohol had Will longing for Gabriel’s home. He went to the kitchen, ignored the unwashed dishes in the sink, and put away his food. He looked through the bare cupboards to find something for dinner. There were pizzas in the freezer. Instant Meals. Chips. Cake. Crisps. Eggs… He took the eggs out.
While he waited for them to cook, he called the bank to find out what happened to his card. He already knew. He wanted to double-check. The woman on the other end told him that his mom had cancelled it.
Will tried to wrap his head around what that meant. No food for lunch. No money for gas. He could ask his dad for money, but he knew that wouldn’t get him far. His dad was always the one who took money from Mom because he spent all his own on beer.
Trying to come up with a plan was impossible. It was like his mind was working at half-speed. He ate the eggs, spent two minutes trying to tackle homework, and finally ended up doing the only thing he was good at: exercise. He went running. At least it got him out of the house, and out of his head.