Chapter 42 What Are You Waiting For? - Spencer
I’d been a basket case all day long. When Jayson had to head out and get some rest for his game tomorrow night, he made sure that I left the bar with him. He said I didn’t need to waste away in public—it’d be a better look if I did it from home.
My head was clouded with what Peyton said.
She’s meeting up with Jax tonight. He wanted to talk.
Were they talking right now? Had they already talked? Was he being a fucking grown-up this time? Or was she scared and needed me to step in again?
The alcohol from earlier was wearing off, only making my thoughts more intrusive.
As much as I’d told myself every day to stop texting her, that she wouldn’t answer, I had zero self-control.
Even though I wasn’t supposed to know that they were meeting up, I did.
And it was fucking torture. It was taking everything in me not to text Peyton for more information.
“Fuck it,” I grumbled, grabbing my phone from the kitchen counter.
Me: Hi, Peyton. I know Jayson was supposed to keep his mouth shut, but it’s not his fault—
I was mid text when the elevator door dinged. There were only a couple of people on my list that were allowed access without having to call up for permission. And I swear to God, if Jayson was barging in on me, I was going to fucking lose it.
“Spencer?”
I froze.
Her sweet sound echoed through my penthouse, and my stomach bottomed out. I’d been dying to hear her voice. For weeks, I’d spent my lonely nights, filling the void in all the ways she used to say my name.
The breathy tone when I had her underneath me.
The grogginess in her voice when I’d wake her up too early.
The sweet way she clipped my name, calling me Spence.
Now adding to the list, the question in her voice as she searched for me, continuing to call out my name.
“Spencer? Are you home?”
Her question pulled me out of the spiral my mind was going down. This wasn’t a moment of reminiscing—this was real. She was here, calling out for me.
My throat was dry, unable to get the words out.
Instead of answering her, I followed her voice like a siren.
When she walked in from the elevator, she must have turned down the hall toward my room. The entryway was empty, her intoxicating cherry scent being the only thing in my path.
At forty years old, I’d never been nervous to come face to face with a woman before.
But Avery had a way of bringing me to my knees.
She had full control over me, making me feel weak the moment I laid my eyes on her.
With her being here, my mind went to one of two places: she’d break it off with me for good, or she’d work through this with me, take me back, and put me out of my fucking misery.
Before she could shatter my heart, I stood back, watching as she looked for me in every corner of my bedroom.
When I wasn’t in the closet or the bathroom, she turned to head out of the room to look elsewhere.
Except, she wouldn’t get far, because I was already there, looking at her just a few feet away with my eyes latched onto hers.
“Spencer...” Her lips parted as she cried my name.
“Bella.” My eyes stung with tears that threatened to fall. I could hardly say her name without feeling the ache in my heart when there was still a possibility I could lose her for good.
Her purse dropped to the floor, and before I could even hear the thump, her arms wrapped behind my neck, and her legs hugged tightly around my waist.
I’d hold her in my arms until they completely gave out. And even then, I’d fall along with her, keeping her against my body until the end of fucking time.
I couldn’t risk letting her go again.
“Spencer.”
My name was the only word on the tip of her tongue. Her body shook as she cried it into my ear over and over again, and each time, I told her everything would be alright.
Her back molded to my hands. The sensation of touching her felt completely unreal.
“Talk to me, Avery,” I whispered into her shoulder.
When she finally pulled away from me, still in my arms, her face was void of makeup, and it took my fucking breath away. Her cheeks were flushed from crying, and her lips plump.
“I’m so fucking sorry, Spencer. I just couldn’t do it anymore,” she cried as her bloodshot eyes stayed locked onto mine.
A wave of sharp pain ran through my stomach. Her words could mean anything. What couldn’t she do anymore?
My mind hopped back on the spiral ride it went on earlier, taking me to the worst of places.
“What can’t you do anymore?” I choked up the courage to ask.
“I have so much to tell you, but the first thing I need you to know is that I can’t be away from you another day, Spence.”
A wave of relief washed over me, and a tear rolled down my cheek, fully unable to hold back anymore.
When her finger brushed along my cheekbone, wiping it away, another followed.
She couldn’t be away from me anymore.
That statement alone let me in on everything I needed to know.
Sure, she had a lot to tell me, and I had enough questions to fill the time of our next twelve dates.
But right now, I needed her. I needed to get lost in her.
With all the words lodged in my throat and no idea where to begin, I had to show her just how much I missed her.
How much my love only grew for her while she was away.
With one arm wrapped securely around her body, the other fed up the back of her shirt, filling my palm with the back of her neck.
She shivered in my arms as my fingers ran along the base of her spine, and by the way her eyes looked into mine, unwilling to look away, I knew she felt the same way.
“You have no idea how many nights I’ve dreamed of this moment since the last time I saw you,” I whispered, my forehead meeting hers.
“And what moment is that?”
Her hands roamed along the coarseness of my beard, grown out longer than normal from the days I hadn’t been in the mood to take care of myself.
“The moment I got to feel you in my arms and kiss you again,” I breathed mere centimeters from her lips.
“Then what are you waiting for, Daddy? Are you going to kiss me, or not?” she said with a sass in her attitude that I’d felt lost without.
Picking up right where we’d left off, as if we put the past weeks on hold, my lips collided with hers, refusing to waste another second. The sweet taste of her tongue sucked me in, and I was completely gone for her.
Our tongues were tied, battling for control between each hurried kiss. Her fingers pulled my hair as if she was scared I might let go of her. And I welcomed every minute of the pain.
I thrived off the pain.
Feeling her physically in my arms, touching me, grabbing onto me for dear life, was the awakening my body begged for every night when I fell asleep without her near me.
“I missed you so much, Spencer.” Avery pulled back just long enough to whimper before her lips were back on mine.
“I missed you too, baby,” I whispered roughly as I moved along her jaw.
I tore our kiss apart so that when my lips trailed down her neck, I could take in every sweet sound she’d make.
“I missed this,” I added, my lips brushing along her collar bone. “I missed hearing you moan my name.”
I stepped forward, propping her against the wall before sliding my tongue along her neck, all the way up to her ear.
“Yes, Spence,” she dragged out my name in a hiss.
“I missed the way you call me Daddy when you’re coming so hard you can’t think straight,” I groaned, pulling her earlobe between my teeth.
“Fuck. I need you, Daddy,” she panted between breaths.
Avery ripped me away from her neck and slammed her lips against mine. Her teeth tugged along my lower lip, piercing me with need. Her eagerness pulled a desperate grunt out of me that brought my cock to life.
I know I said I’d hold on to her forever. That I wouldn’t let her go. But my hands were dying to roam every inch of her body. They ached to unbutton my pants and release the pain that grew harder and harder.
With our lips still connected and our tongues intertwined, I dropped to my knees one at a time.
Lying her gently on the plush carpet, I pulled away so I could look down at her and take in the beauty that was mine.
“Fucking beautiful, Bella,” I panted, my chest rising and falling at the speed of light.
I watched her gasp for air just as I was trying to catch my own. Not only had she stolen the breath from my lungs, but my words were almost nonexistent, and my thoughts were a jumbled mess.
The only thing running through my mind was how I had to have her.
My eyes moved slowly down her body, tracing every curve. The frantic pace we had just moments ago washed away. The intensity in which she looked at me was pleading. Her gaze begged me to touch her in all the places that would make every inch of her come alive.
With her legs locked around my waist and her back flat against the floor, I gripped her legs, moving my hands up her thighs ever so slowly.
My favorite thing to do was watch her. Take her in. See how she reacted to me. Watch as her plump lips parted and her breath hitched while I worked my hands up her leggings, dangerously close to her center.
Just knowing how soaked she had to be caused my cock to twitch beneath my slacks.
Fuck.
The harder I grew, the more the pain intensified. The more I needed relief.
I’d been dying to feel my length in the palm of her hand.
Squeezing me. Roaming her hands up and down.
Her fingers working over my balls. But I’d also been a patient fucking man, and I was willing to wait a few moments longer if it meant I could take her in.
Continue to watch her. Feel every inch of her.
Get lost in this moment knowing I had her back.
My hands crept under her tank top and worked their way up along her toned stomach, reaching for her tits.
When I slipped my thumbs underneath her lace bra, grazing along the underside of her breasts, she let out a sweet moan—her way of asking for more.