Chapter Sixteen
Haizley
With Aspen settled in her room, Amber offered to stay with her for the night. After learning about Amber, I knew she was the right person to stay with Aspen.
The two of them were having nightmares. They would be able to comfort each other and maybe I would get a full night’s rest.
If I had a damn room to sleep in.
Walking back into the main room, I heard shouting coming from the room they called church. I sat at the bar and waited for them to finish.
“What can I get you?” The young man behind the bar couldn’t have been more than eighteen or nineteen.
“Rum and coke?” He nodded and moved away to make my drink.
A big, bald man sat down next to me. The hair on the back of my neck stood up, leaving me no other option than to pretend he wasn’t there.
Unfortunately, he didn’t like that option.
“You Gunner’s old lady?” he asked. His voice was gravelly, but not in that sexy way.
More like he chewed rocks for a snack.
“No.”
“So, what are you twenty-four, twenty-five?” I could feel his eyes on me, and I prayed the prospect came back soon.
“Twenty-eight.”
“Still under thirty. I bet you’re still tight like a teenager.”
“Excuse me?” I turned a glare on the man. On his cut I saw the name Freeway with Little Rock over it and member under it. I assumed he was visiting. And he wasn’t important. I had done my research into the hierarchy of clubs. It all fascinated me.
So, I knew that while none of their alpha male egos wanted to be knocked down by a woman, seeing as he was only a member, I had the right to defend myself. Not that if he was an officer, I wouldn’t still defend myself, but I needed to be here for Aspen, so I needed to be careful.
“Over thirty and a girl’s cunt gets all loose and worn out. Too many cocks in and out of it. Know what I mean?” He took a drink from the beer bottle he held in his hand, and I had the strongest urge to grab it and slam it over his head.
“That’s because your fucking pecker is too small. Like pushing a pencil through a toilet paper roll. Get the fuck out of here.”
I turned to look at the man who spoke.
He was older, maybe fifty, but handsome. He wasn’t wearing a cut, so I wasn’t sure what his role here was.
“Who the fuck are you to talk to me like that?” Freeway stood toe to toe with the man. They were roughly the same height, but Freeway looked like he had fifty pounds on the handsome guy.
“You ain’t a fucking member of this club. You don’t talk to a patched member like that and still get to stand.”
“You’re right,” the man agreed. “I’m not a member of this club. I’m a fucking Soulless Sinner.”
Freeway visibly gulped, and I sat there in awe.
This was interesting.
I wondered what a Soulless Sinner was.
“I... uh... didn’t know. Sorry.” Freeway took his beer and walked to the other side of the room. He sat on the couch and glared at the man he’d just backed down from.
“I believe this is yours.” He moved my glass closer. The prospect must have dropped it off during the exchange. “Let me apologize for that. I don’t know who he is, but he isn’t like the other brothers here.”
“I would venture to say you aren’t either.” I took a sip of my drink, hoping it would help calm my nerves. No one had ever spoken in such a vulgar way to me before.
“Not that different, actually. Prospect, whiskey.”
“Um,” the kid stuttered.
The man glared at him and hissed, “Hell’s Breath. Now.”
“Yes, sir.”
“That wasn’t nice,” I chastised him with a smile.
“Everyone thinks I have a fucking drinking problem. I’m a goddamn doctor who is good at what he does. Drinking when I’m not working doesn’t make me a drunk.”
“Can you go a day without drinking?” I asked.
“This is the first drink I’ve had in three fucking days.” He tossed his drink down his throat and knocked his glass on the bar. The kid quickly filled it back up. Despite how much the man intrigued me, I decided to turn off my therapist brain and avoid assessing him like I typically would.
Instead, I asked, “What’s a Soulless Sinner?”
He scoffed. “A fucking noose around my neck.”
“Funny, it doesn’t look like you have anything around your neck.”
The man turned to look at me, and I smiled.
Holding my hand out, I said, “Hi. Dr. Haizley Walker, board-certified psychologist.”
He laughed, taking my hand in his.
“Dr. August Lansing, board-certified physician. Otherwise known as Bane.”
“Well, Bane. I assume that is a road name. Does that mean the Soulless Sinners are a motorcycle club as well?”
“Yea, from New York.”
“New York! What are you doing here?”
He took another drink before answering. “Just needed a break from all the shit back home.”
“I see. So, you decided to come to the middle of nowhere and get involved in the shit there?”
I laughed, and so did Bane.
“Something like that.”
“How do you feel about Diamond Creek?” I asked, trying to hide my grin. I couldn’t help myself; it wasn’t often I got the chance to talk to someone else in the medical field.
Bane turned to look at me and lifted an accusing eyebrow. I lost the fight and threw my head back. Bane just shook his head at me, but I didn’t miss the smile. Something told me this man didn’t smile often.
“Brother, if she can make that surly fucker smile, you better wife her up.”
I jumped at Blade’s words.
I still hadn’t gotten used to seeing him as someone other than Micah, but I was getting there.
“I didn’t realize you were done,” I said to Gunner. He just stood there, staring at me like I was a puzzle he was trying to figure out.
“It was nice talking to you, Dr. Walker,” Bane said, standing from his stool.
“You too, Dr. Lansing.” I put my hand on his arm. “Thank you.”
Bane winked before stopping in front of Gunner.
“The fucker on the couch better watch his step.”
“What the fuck did he do?” Gunner asked, glaring across the room.
Bane walked away without answering.
When Gunner went to take a step, I grabbed his arm.
“Gunner.” He looked back at me, his features softening immediately. “Let it go.”
“What the fuck did he do?”
“He was just talking.”
“Son of a bitch.” He took another step and I moved in front of him, my hands on his chest. His very hard chest. I lost my train of thought as my hands moved of their own accord and rubbed over his pecs.
Gunner grabbed my wrists, halting my movements and said, “Baby, I love having your hands on me, but I need to know what he said.”
I didn’t hear his words, my mind consumed with thoughts of what his chest looked like under his shirt.
“Haizley,” Gunner growled.
Snapping out of my fantasy, I shook my head and looked up to find him grinning at me.
“What?”
With my hands still firmly on his chest, I felt the rumble as he growled in a completely different way, and my eyes dropped back down to his chest.
“Baby, I want to take your ass upstairs, but you need to tell me what Freeway said.”
“They were just words, Gunner. It’s not important.”
“If he fucking disrespected you it is important.”
“Gunner, I’m tired. Where is my room?”
Maybe a redirect approach would work.
He smiled at me, and my heart stopped. Had this man never smiled at me before? Because a smile like that was dangerous. I was ready to drop my panties and do whatever he asked of me.
Shaking my head, I cleared my thoughts.
“You’re sleeping in my room, my little lamb,” he whispered in my ear before biting my earlobe. “Sit down for just a minute, though.”
Gunner lifted me up and set me on the bar. Not a stool, the frickin’ bar. He stalked across the room, and Freeway saw him coming because he jumped off the couch and started sputtering.
“I asked if she was your old lady. She said no.” He had his hands up by his head, and I saw the moment he realized what he said didn’t matter. Gunner cocked his hand back and slammed it into his nose. I winced when I heard the crack of the bone.
“Fuck! You broke my nose.”
“You’re lucky that’s all I fucking broke. I’ve had enough of your bullshit.”
Gunner turned back and stalked toward me. His eyes never left mine. When he reached me, he placed his hands on my ass and lifted me off the bar, pulling me against his chest.
“Wrap your legs around me, baby,” he whispered.
I couldn’t help but obey.
There was something about the way Gunner spoke that caused me to lose all sense of autonomy. It was like my body had a mind of its own when it heard his voice.
Wrapping my arms around his neck and my legs around his waist, he turned and walked down the hallway.
“I can walk you know.”
“I know. Just not takin’ the chance you’ll walk out the door.”
“I’m not having sex with you, Gunner.”
“Oh, baby. We ain’t having sex. I’m gonna fuck you. All fucking night.” He squeezed my ass as he raced up the stairs, causing me to hold on tighter for fear of being dropped.
My core clenched at his dirty words. I thought back to the men I had been with and wondered what the difference was between having sex and being fucked. I mean, I know everyone had different experiences and different skills. And I knew there was a difference between having sex and making love. Making love clearly had more emotion, more connection. But how could having sex be that different from being fucked?
I had gotten so caught up in my thoughts, I didn’t realize we had made it to his room until I was flying through the air and landing on his bed with a bounce.
Before I could move, Gunner crawled over me. He gazed down at me with a heated look that made my panties even wetter.
Why was this so hot? Why did it feel like my body was craving something?
Something only Gunner could give me.
I lost my chance to protest when his lips crashed into mine. Could I have stopped him? Seeing the way he had been with Aspen told me that if I said no, if I made it known I didn’t want this, he would stop. I was confident he would walk away if I uttered that one simple word.
But I couldn’t do it.
I didn’t want to do it.
I wanted to be fucked.
By this giant of a man.
He settled between my legs and pressed his erection against my center, and I winced.
Shit. I forgot.
“Gunner.”
“Yea, baby, say my name.” His lips moved down my chin to my throat.
“Gunner,” I said louder.
His hands held my face, and he kissed me again. My brain went offline when his lips were on me. I couldn’t think about anything but how he made me feel.
Until he pressed against me again.
“Gunner, stop!”
Immediately, he lifted up on his hands and stared at me.
“I’m sorry.”
“No, don’t be sorry. I wanted to.”
“Then what’s the problem?”
I held my finger against his lips. “We can’t. Not yet.”
“Why the fuck not?” He leaned down to kiss me again and I pushed against his chest. I knew if he wanted to overpower me, I would be helpless against him. I also knew that the space I put between us when I pushed at his chest was because he allowed it.
“I have to tell you something.”