Chapter 9
Chapter Nine
T he air around us crackled with electricity. All the hairs on my arms stood on end.
Ren's mouth brushed mine, soft and sweet. My eyes fluttered shut. The kiss was innocent, chaste, but his mouth was so warm, so hot.
He flicked his tongue along my upper lip, seeking entrance.
I froze.
Ren must have noticed my body tensing up, because he pulled away, confused. I don't know what he saw when he looked at me. I wasn't sure myself which one of a thousand emotions was flashing across my face.
His expression held a trace of concern before he gave me a soft smile. "It's okay, Ivy." He started shifting back to the other side of the sofa.
My heart clenched. Was I really going to turn him down?
I grabbed at his arm, keeping him from moving. He stilled and watched me carefully. I ducked my head to avoid his stare and felt myself blushing.
"I'm worried," I whispered.
"Worried about what?" His voice was so soft.
About you, I thought. About us.
I didn't know what the two of us were. It was too early to have the 'where is this relationship going' talk—we weren't even in a relationship.
And that was the problem.
Rock stars don't date nice girls.
Mark's words had been echoing in my head non-stop. I glanced up, meeting Ren's eyes for a brief moment. They were kind, patient.
No. Ren couldn't possibly be like that. As different as he was now, he was still the Ren I knew from back home. He was still the boy who waited to drive me home after our music lessons, who lost his somber expression during the brief moments when we talked. He was still the boy I'd fallen for but never had a chance to tell.
Losing Ren the first time had been devastating.
I wasn't going to lose him again.
I took his hand, twining his fingers with mine, and tugged him toward me. My legs were tucked up underneath me on the sofa, the hem of my dress inching up my thighs. He cupped my cheeks, forcing me to look at him. This time he saw no hesitation. I wasn't worried anymore. I wasn't scared or nervous.
He ran a gentle thumb across my bottom lip, following it with his eyes. Did he know how much of a tease that was? I wet my lips unconsciously, catching a quick taste of his skin. He breathed in sharply, eyes narrowing with heat.
This time my hand moved to his face, cupping his cheek as I rubbed my thumb along his lips. I traced the lines of his mouth, inching closer. My hands were trembling. I tried to focus on his eyes, but I just couldn't ignore his lips so close to mine.
Then his lips found mine again with a light touch. They brushed together in a gentle rhythm. I sighed into his mouth.
His hands settled on my sides, fingers spread out along my ribcage, just barely brushing the edges of my bra. His hands were so big that it felt like he could encircle me completely with his grip.
I moved without any input from my brain, reaching up and placing my hands around Ren's muscled shoulders, pulling him close. His fingers tightened around me for a moment before he slid down from my sides to my hips, thumbs caressing the valleys of my hipbones.
The hem of my dress had bunched around my waist as wandering hands made their way down my hips to the tops of my thighs. I inhaled deeply, my breasts pressing against his chest. I couldn't stop the slight rock of my hips. I curled one hand around the back of Ren's neck, forcing him closer.
Seeing Ren hovering above me, feeling him pressed against me, was hotter than anything I'd ever experienced. My breathing got faster, heavier.
He explored my body, the fabric of my dress a barrier between us. He deliberately avoided sensitive places, but his hands were everywhere—cupping my cheeks, caressing my shoulders, stroking my stomach.
My nipples peaked visibly through the fabric of my dress, drawing his attention. He brushed over them with his thumbs, wringing a gasp from my lips. I couldn't stop the squirm of my hips at that light touch. I was a writhing ball of desire, unable to think. I wanted more. I needed more.
I sat up, surprising him. With one fluid motion I tugged my dress over my head.
Ren seemed taken aback for a moment. I settled down, reclining against the arm of the sofa and bared myself to him clothed only in a bra and panties. I thought I should feel embarrassed, wondering what he thought of my body, but the blatant hunger in Ren's eyes erased all thoughts of shame.
He touched me with reverent fingers, eyes following the path of his hands, drinking in every exposed inch of me. He cupped both my breasts gently, caressing in circles, sending a thrill throughout my body.
I trailed my fingers along the side of his neck, across strong shoulders and down muscled arms. His t-shirt was in the way. I tugged at the hem, making Ren paused his exploration to straighten his back and rise up on his knees to loom over me. He practically tore off his shirt in one hurried motion.
My breath caught in my throat as I took in that muscled chest, those toned abs, that perfect skin. My friends were right. He was irresistible.
He towered over me for several long moments, letting me drink in the sight of him. My breathing sped up at the shifting and flexing of muscles under skin.
I noticed the bulge at the front of his jeans and swallowed hard. I could see the thick outline of a hard length through his pants. I wanted to reach out and touch it, touch him , but I didn't think I could. Why did Ren always bring that shyness out of me? Like he was larger than life, like I was a tiny mouse dangling from a cat's paw. He had more power over me than any other person I'd known.
I risked glancing up. The look in his eyes was powerful and intense. It nearly burned me to the core.
"God, Ivy, you have no idea what you're doing to me." He was nearly breathless with need. I was shocked at the passion in his voice. He captured my lips in a devastating kiss and I couldn't think anymore.
With one swift motion he pressed me back against the sofa cushions, crawling between my thighs and spreading them open. I was just as eager and wrapped my arms around his neck, tightening my legs around his hips. I leaned back against the armrest, letting his body come to rest over mine. I could feel him against me, hard and thick against the thin cotton of my panties. Our hips were grinding together, the friction driving the both of us crazy.
He ravaged my mouth, fierce and desperate. Our lips worked together, our tongues battling, hungry. I blushed at the wanton moan that escaped my lips. My fingers dug into his bare back, clawing at the skin. Our bodies couldn't have been coiled more tightly together. I was overwhelmed by his mouth, his lips, his tongue.
Ren inched his way up my thighs until the tips of his fingers met the elastic of my panties. A fiery ache ignited between my legs. He stopped, going no further. In one bold move, before I could think about it, I took one of his hands and placed it between my legs, palm pressing against my most sensitive spot. I let out a whimper as he pressed down, feeling wetness beginning to flow out of me.
He hooked his fingers around the elastic of my panties, a question in his eyes. I nodded, breathless. He slowly pulled them off, exposing me. I flushed and clenched my legs together, but he slipped back between my thighs and used strong hands to spread me open.
He found me wet and wanting as I held my breath. He pressed a thumb down on that one perfect spot and I flailed, whimpering, hips bucking and fingers clenching. My writhing got more intense, my legs clamping down around his hips, grinding against him, wanton in my need. I whimpered and squeezed my eyes shut. I could barely breathe.
He found my heated core, middle finger sliding between the slippery valley between my thighs. I thumped my head back on the armrest, unable to hold my head up.
With one earth-shattering motion he thrust inside, parting my inner walls easily with two fingers. I wailed, the slow drag of it driving me crazy. He slid inside again and again, pulling out then pushing in, slow and teasing. He explored me thoroughly until I was squirming and bucking underneath him.
I opened my legs wider, wanting more. I couldn't speak, only capable of sharp squeaks and high pitched shrieks. I didn't think I could take much more teasing. I fisted his hair tight between my fingers, tugging at the strands with every buck of my hips.
He thrusted harder and harder, finger-fucking me at an unrelenting pace. The thought of him fucking me with something else, something harder and thicker, sent me over the edge.
My back arched off the sofa, hips surging, forcing his fingers deeper inside as the pleasure broke through and utterly destroyed me. I cried out, shuddering.
He pulled me to him with his other hand, holding me close as my body shook with pleasure, quaking with aftershocks as I struggled to breathe. I clutched his shoulders, gripping tight as I panted and gasped. He ran one hand through my hair, threading his fingers through the strands. I opened my eyes. I wanted to see him.
His eyes were still full of fire, still blazing hot. I became acutely aware of the hard length against my leg.
I reached down and pressed my hand against the bulge. Ren hissed and closed his eyes. I felt around for the button of his jeans. His eyes flew open.
"Ivy…" His voice was strained. I loved the way he said my name, heated and thick with unrestrained desire. "You don't have to."
"I want to." My voice came out breathless but firm.
Ren groaned. He took my hand and guided me to his zipper, pulling it down. A thick, hard length fell into my hands. I gently wrapped my fingers around it.
Ren's eyes fluttered closed again. I brought my other hand up to his cheek, waiting for him to look at me. When he finally did, I locked eyes with him and gave one firm stroke up and down.
He choked back a groan and fell forward, pressing his lips into my hair. He throbbed and grew harder in my hands.
I almost couldn't believe it was happening, but he felt too real to just be a dream. I explored him carefully with my fingers, gripping the base of his cock with one hand and circling my thumb along the head with the other. A low growl escaped his throat. I began applying firm strokes, making sure to keep a steady rhythm. His breath grew ragged. Droplets of sticky wetness coated my thumb. I danced my fingers along his shaft, playing with him the way he had played with me.
His lips suddenly captured mine, prying my mouth open with his tongue. The kiss was no longer chaste or soft. It was forceful, full of hunger and need.
I increased my speed, matching the intensity of his kiss, adding more pressure. Ren let out a choked cry, his body tensing up, and then my hands were coated with warm, thick liquid flowing from his shaft and dripping over my fingers.
I continued to work him through it, not stopping my strokes until he made a pained hissing sound. I stopped with my hand still on him, not wanting to let go.
He panted heavily, exhaling warm puffs of air into my mouth, not wanting to part from my lips.
"Was that—?" I started to ask, then fell silent, not wanting to sound insecure.
Ren wrapped his arms around me and squeezed me tight. "God, you're perfect."
A smile spread across my face and I buried my face in his neck. That had been a million times better than when I'd touched myself thinking about him.
"Do you have any tissues?" I asked, hesitant. I didn't want to break the moment, but I was sticky in more ways than one.
He pressed a kiss to my hair. "In the bathroom, maybe." He heaved himself off me. I mourned the loss of his body heat, but he simply picked up his shirt from the floor.
"Here." He used the shirt to clean me up. I felt bad that his shirt was ruined, but on the other hand, that meant he had to stay shirtless.
I grinned inwardly. I could live with that.
After we were both clean and dressed, I didn't know what to do. I stood there fidgeting with my hands. Ren finished buttoning up his jeans and noticed. He took my hands in his and pressed a soft, quick kiss to my lips.
"Can I have that glass of water now?" I asked.
He laughed. "Sure. I'll get you something."
I followed him into the kitchen, not wanting to let him out of my sight. I didn't want to be that girl , but I figured I had some right to be clingy after what we just did.
Ren passed me a bottle of water and I sat down at his kitchen table. He took a seat across from me. It was oddly formal, but he reached across the table and took my hand, rubbing his thumb over my knuckles. Even after everything, that small touch still had the power to make me blush.
"I had an idea," he said.
"About?" More sexy stuff?
"About your situation."
My heart sank. I pulled my hands away, not wanting to get into another argument. "I already told you?—"
"Not the scholarship. I'm talking about something else."
"What is it?" Maybe he was going to force the event company to hire me after all, although I couldn't let him do that either.
"Let's forget about the scholarship for now. What if there was another way for you to make money?"
I was skeptical, but willing to listen.
"What if we do a duet?"
"A…duet?"
"Jayce is always doing these acoustic versions of our songs. They're really popular. I've always wanted to do a classical version. What if we composed a song together? I could play piano and you could play cello. We could release it as a digital-only single. I'll pay you for your work."
Piano and cello were often paired together for duets. I thought about it for a moment, tempted, but there was a voice in the back of my head that said I would still be using Ren. I couldn't let some rich boy swoop in and rescue me like in all those ridiculous TV shows and movies. I shook my head.
"That's not going to work."
"Why not?"
"I need to do this on my own."
Ren bolted up from the kitchen chair and paced, growling. "Why are you so stubborn?"
"I don't need your charity."
"It's not charity!" The frustration was evident in his voice.
"Why are you so determined to solve this for me?"
"You need help. I can do something about it."
"I don't need you to fix all my problems for me!"
"You wouldn't answer my calls!" Ren burst out, running a hand through his hair.
I frowned, confused at the change of subject. "What's that got to do with anything?"
"I was worried I'd never hear from you again. I thought if I helped you, maybe?—"
A lightbulb went off in my head. I didn't want to consider it, but I had to ask. "Did you think I'd only be with you if you paid my tuition?"
His face registered hurt, but there was also a hint of guilt. Indignation punched through my chest.
"I can't believe you!"
"I didn't know what else to do!"
"You can't just throw money at people!"
"It's been five years. We barely know each other anymore. I didn't know if you'd still?—"
"If I'd still what?"
"It's been so long. I've changed. I didn't know if—" He cut himself off, apprehension on his face.
"You didn't know if I'd still like you?"
"I wanted a reason for you to stay with me. To be with me."
I was aghast. "That's not how it works! You can't just buy people off, Ren."
He shut down. That was the only way to describe it. His eyes went blank, his face expressionless. He stood frozen in the middle of the kitchen, turned away from me.
"Look, I'm sorry I didn't contact you. I was working through some stuff." Like whether or not Ren, now a rich and famous rock star, was just like all the rumors said. Did he really think I cared about his money? "I'm not going to let you do this for me."
Ren was completely still, completely silent. His eyes were flat, lifeless. He didn't even acknowledge me.
I bit my lip. Had I hurt him by turning down his offer? It didn't matter.
"I'm sorry, Ren." I grabbed my purse and cello case, turning to leave. Before the door closed behind me, I looked at him one last time.
"I don't need some rich guy to save me."