Chapter 28
Chapter Twenty-Eight
" Y ou're such a sweetie, Becca."
Helen took the stack of books from my over-filled arms.
"Wouldn't want you to get bored," I told her. "You said paranormal romance, right?"
"That's the one," she said. "I've got a thing for those werewolf love stories."
I pulled up a chair and sat next to Helen's bedside. It was my evening to spend time in the adult ward, and I'd looked forward to seeing Helen again. She was a lovely lady.
"How are the hats coming along?" I asked.
Helen had come up with an idea to create party hats for the children. It was easy enough to decorate a piece of paper with stickers and fold it into a coned hat with a string for under the chin.
"I've already made more than a dozen," she said. "It's a fun way to take my mind off things."
I completely understood the need to distract yourself from the reason you were in the hospital.
"You're such a sweetheart to have put this together for the kids," Helen said. "It's such a wonderful idea. I know how hard it can be on a child, always in and out of the hospital at such a young age."
Helen and I were discussing the party when a nurse came in to check her vitals and make some notes on her chart.
"You seem in good spirits, Mrs. Walker," the nurse said as she made a mark with her pencil.
"This lovely young lady here has been wonderful company," Helen said.
Helen Walker.
Nathan's last name was Walker.
I knew his mom was sick and in this hospital.
She said her son always looked out for her when he was growing up. She also said he was something of a wild child.
No.
It couldn't be.
What were the chances?
"Helen…" I asked once the nurse was gone. "Is your son's name Nathan?"
"Oh no, don't tell me, you're a fan of Cherry Lips?" She gave me a crooked smile. "And now you've found out I'm his mom. Are you going to start stalking my hospital room to get a glimpse of him?"
I was too stunned to respond.
"Maybe I could ask him to sign something for you, how does that sound?" she asked.
I shook my head slowly. "No. I'm not a fan of Cherry Lips."
"Oh, are you a fan of his old band?" Her eyes turned sad. "I've always felt bad about everything that happened."
I knew very little about Nathan's old band. All he'd told me was he'd left them because he'd been going through some stuff. Had this been the stuff? His mom being sick?
"Everything…?" I asked carefully.
Her mouth pursed. "You didn't know? Well, I suppose not many people did."
"Nathan left the band, didn't he?"
"No." She sighed quietly. "They kicked him out. And it was my fault."
It was like a blow to my chest.
They'd… kicked him out.
Because of his mom? Because she was sick?
"They weren't very good friends to my son," she said. "They weren't very understanding. He had to take me to all my appointments, he had to stay home sometimes to take care of me. They didn't think he was committed to the band." Her eyes glittering with unshed tears. "So they kicked him out."
I felt sick. I felt nauseous. I felt like I was going to throw up any second.
This explained so much. It explained everything.
The swirling turmoil in my stomach began to congeal into a hard lump.
"Becca, dear, I'm sorry." Helen reached out to take my hand. "I shouldn't have told you all of that. I've just been feeling so guilty for so long. It felt nice to finally tell someone."
"It's okay, Helen." I couldn't feel my fingers. I couldn't feel her fingers on mine. I pulled my hand back. "Why don't I go get the party supplies and we can keep working on those hats?"
She looked at me oddly before nodding. "Of course, sweetie."
I got up from the chair and headed toward the door. I'd just pulled it open when I smacked face first into someone's chest.
"Nathan!" his mother cried. "You're not supposed to be here for another few hours."
Nathan looked down at me. I stared up at him.
"We decided to finish early today," he told his mom without taking his eyes off me. "What are you doing here?" he asked.
"Volunteering," I managed to say.
"Do you two already know each other?" Helen asked, confused. "Sweetie, why didn't you say so?"
"You've met my mom?" Nathan asked.
"I didn't know she was your mom until just now."
He look chagrinned, before letting out a rueful laugh. "Well, might as well do introductions, then."
I shook my head. "No."
His lips quirked as he whispered to me. "Worried about meeting the 'rents? It's okay, she'll love you. Mom," he said in a louder voice. "This is the girl I've been dating."
Helen looked confused. "You're dating Becca? What happened to what's her name? Stephanie or Bethany? Oh, wait, it was Tiffany, wasn't it?"
Nathan flicked his eyes to me, looking embarrassed. "No, those… those are over. Becca and I have been dating for a while now."
"Really?" she looked utterly confused. "I had no idea you two knew each other."
"We met at the hospital, actually," he said.
"And you're serious about each other?" she asked.
"Mom!" Nathan looked embarrassed.
"I'm just saying, honey, you don't have a very good track record, and Becca is a lovely girl."
"Mom, stop," Nathan said uncomfortably, shifting on both feet.
"I…" I swallowed hard. "I've got to get back to work."
Nathan frowned at me. "Becca?"
"Sorry." I pushed past him to dash through the door.
"I'll come find you later?" he called out in a questioning tone.
I didn't reply, just hurried down the hall until I was out of sight. I wandered, in a daze, until I found myself in the cafeteria. I slumped down into a seat and stared at the surface of the table, not really seeing anything.
Helen's words explained so much. They explained everything.
She'd made everything clear. I'd just had everything spelled out in black and white.
I now understood exactly what Nathan had gone through.
And that was when I knew.
The lump in my gut turned to pure ice.
I could never make him go through it again.