Chapter 35
Chapter Thirty-Five
N athan and I stood outside his mom's hospital room. Helen was napping and we didn't want to disturb her, but we figured the best way to explain to Gael was to show him.
"I don't know about this." Nathan was nervously tapping his fingers together in a familiar rhythm. It sounded like the song he'd played for me on his acoustic guitar.
"Everything will be fine," I reassured him. "Your band is like family. Gael is your best friend. He would want to know. He wouldn't want you keeping secrets from him."
Nathan snorted. "Yeah. He's going to be pissed I didn't tell him earlier."
"Only because he's worried about you," I countered. "They all are."
"I thought I'd managed to hide it pretty well," he said, shame-faced. "The last thing I wanted to do is to worry them, and that's exactly what happened anyway."
"It's going to be all right, I promise. They'll understand."
A shuffling of soft sneakers echoed down the hallway. A young woman in a t-shirt and messy bun was walking toward us. It was Jessie, looking more like the girl I'd met at the party and less like the biker chick she'd been dressed up as at the pet shop. I wished I could pull off both looks as effortlessly as she did.
"Gael's on his way," she said. "He stopped to give an autograph to someone."
Probably Nancy, I snickered to myself.
Jessie looked at Nathan with concern. "I don't know what's going on because Becca wouldn't say, but please tell me we're not in the hospital because you're dying."
She said it as a half-joke, but I could tell there was a real fear in her eyes.
"No," Nathan said. "I'm perfectly fine." He flicked his eyes over Jessie's shoulder. He tensed up.
Gael was striding toward us, a smug grin on his face. Jessie had said he had a big ego. He probably loved getting stopped by random fans. When he saw me and Nathan standing there with Jessie, his face mirrored her concern.
"Can someone please tell me what the hell is going on?" he asked. "We've been wondering what the fuck's been going on with you, and now you're asking to meet me at the hospital?"
I squeezed Nathan's cold and shaky hand.
"It's my mom," he said without wasting words. "She's in the hospital because she might be sick. Cancer. They've been doing tests."
Gael and Jessie's mouthed popped open. Sympathy crossed their faces.
"I am so sorry, man," Gael said. He clapped Nathan on the shoulder and kept his hand there. He brought Nathan in close. "Whatever you need, we're here for you."
"Thanks," Nathan muttered. He shook his head. "Anyway. That's why I've been sneaking off all the time."
"And here I thought you were getting some with Becca over here." Gael jabbed a thumb at me with a knowing smirk.
I flushed, then straightened my back.
"It was some of that, too," I said, not wanting to back down and wither under his teasing.
Gael looked surprised, then chuckled.
"I like her," he declared before turning serious again. "But why didn't you just tell me? Why did you keep it a secret?"
Nathan winced, averting his eyes.
"I might need to take some time off," he admitted reluctantly. "If it turns out to be cancer, I'm going to need to be with my mom. And I know we've got the tour coming up soon. I'd really fucking hate to miss it, but…" he shrugged helplessly, dismay on his face. "And I know how committed everyone is to the band. I didn't want to let you down. I was afraid that—" he cut himself off.
Gael looked at him, puzzled. "Afraid of what?"
"This isn't the first time," Nathan said. "My mom's gone through chemo twice already."
Jessie made a small, sad sound. "That poor woman."
"You know my old band?" Nathan said. "I didn't leave." He took in a slow breath. "I got kicked out."
"Those fuckers!" Gael burst out. "Did they really kick you out of the band because your mom got sick ? What the hell! Who fucking does that?"
Gael's righteous indignation said enough. Nathan's tense muscles began to relax, relief spreading across his face. Gael noticed.
"Is that what you were worried about?" Gael asked, appalled. "Did you think we'd kick you out?"
Nathan murmured something indistinct.
Gael punched him hard in the arm.
"Ow!" Nathan yelped. "You asshole, what was that for?"
"You're the asshole," Gael retorted. "You really think I'd ditch you? You should know me better than that."
"But what about the tour?" Nathan asked.
Gael made a face. "Yeah, that's going to suck, not having you there with us. But," Gael shrugged, "if you've got to be with your mom, then that's that. We'll get someone to fill in temporarily. They won't be as good as you, but that just means Liam will have to pick up the slack."
"You're really okay with this?" Nathan asked.
"Fuck no," Gael said bluntly. "It sucks your mom is sick. It sucks you might have to miss the tour. Playing with some random stranger is going to be weird. But we're not kicking you out of the band, and we're not going to make you abandon your mom if she needs help."
Nathan's mouth quivered before he pressed his lips in a firm line, but his eyes were bright and shiny.
"Aw, man, come here." Gael pulled Nathan into one of those bro half-hugs. "You know you're stuck with us," he said. "Just like we're stuck with you."
Nathan wrapped his arm around Gael's shoulder and returned the hug.
"Thank you," Jessie whispered to me.
"It was nothing," I said. "After what you told me, I knew Nathan had to come clean. It was killing him having to keep it from you, and I knew he'd need the emotional support. He really loves Gael. He loves the band."
"And what about you?" Jessie said. "Do you love Nathan?"
"Yes," I said without hesitation. "And he loves me."
Jessie gave me a bright smile.
"I'm glad he has someone," she said. "I know it hurt him, me and Gael being together. It's important that he has someone to lean on."
I thought back to what Nathan had said that time during our drinking game. He was happy for Gael, happy that he'd found someone to be his rock. Someone he could rely on.
Nathan had spent so much of his childhood taking care of someone else.
I had spent so much of my childhood being taken care of.
Now it was my turn to be the rock.
Gael and Nathan pulled away from each other, their eyes no longer glistening. They were laughing together and calling each other names. Everything was back to normal.
Well. Most things.
"Becca and I have to run," Nathan told them. "We've got dinner plans with her parents later on tonight."
Gael whistled. "Damn, good luck with that."
"I'm going to be on my best behavior," Nathan promised solemnly, putting his hand over his heart.
"Do you even know what good behavior is?" Gael asked.
"I'm sure Becca will guide me," Nathan said.
"Just don't mention getting drunk at raging house parties, trashing hotel rooms or the fact that you're nailing their daughter, and you'll be fine," I said.
"Damn, what else is there to talk about?" Nathan pretended to lament.
They all laughed and we parted ways. As we drove back to my place, Nathan was oddly quiet.
"Are you okay?" I asked.
"Just thinking."
"That can't be good."
"No, it's all good. I'm just grateful you convinced me to talk to Gael. And I'm grateful you wanted me to meet your parents. I'm grateful you were so nice to my mom even though you had no idea who she was. I'm just…" He gave me a soft smile. "I'm just really glad I met you."
My heart swelled.
"Me too," I said, my voice thick with emotion. "And I'm grateful you invited me to that concert. I'm grateful you wanted to show me all the things I missed out on."
"And there's so many more things I still want to show you."
"You mean sexy things?"
He laughed. "Yes. Sexy things and more."
I slid my hand across the seat until it was resting on his thigh.
"Then maybe you can hurry up and get us home so you can show me."