Chapter 12
CHAPTER TWELVE
MICAH
I was a horrible person. A horrible, terrible, monstrous person. That was my mantra as I sped up my pace on the elliptical.
I had every intention of talking to Vanya about what happened once I woke up, but he was snoring away when I rose to consciousness, and somehow, I managed to sneak out of the bed, find something to wear, grab my phone and cane, and make it out the front door without him noticing.
I knew I probably looked fucked out and wrecked beyond reason, but the driver who eventually showed up to pick me up was kind enough not to say anything.
I was still too terrified to go home. The thought that Hunter might be waiting for me made me want to piss my pants, so I had the driver take me to the practice arena so I could shower there and hopefully get a few decent warm-ups done before anyone noticed I was walking funny.
Which I wasn’t. Mostly. I was no stranger to things up my ass. I loved a fat dildo more than I loved rubbing one out. But Vanya really had wrecked me in the best way.
He’d made me wait for it all night, until the release had unlocked something in me that I couldn’t take back. I’d literally cried myself to sleep in his arms.
And then I’d run away like a coward. No text, no call, no nothing. I’d been at the arena for hours now, so there was not a chance in hell he wasn’t awake by now.
And probably hating my guts. If there had been any chance of anything between us, I’d definitely fucked that up.
“Yo, did you hear about Noah?” I had no idea who was speaking.
I attempted to freeze, forgetting for a quick second that I was on a goddamn elliptical, and almost lost my footing. I’d done that before. More than once. I’d probably lost more teeth to exercise equipment accidents than pucks to the face.
“What the fuck?” I turned my head and tried to figure out who’d come in. “Who the fuck is Noah?”
“Noah Brown?” Right. The Glaciers’ coach.
“It’s all over hockey Threads right now.
He’s supposedly taking a job with the AHL.
” Ah. It was Daniel talking to me. His Quebecois accent wasn’t as strong as some of the other guys in the league since he’d been raised between New York and Quebec City growing up, which made him easy to recognize. “The new owner booted his ass.”
The new owner? I hadn’t realized the Glaciers were changing hands. Interesting. “Who bought them?”
“It’s a whole hush-hush thing,” Daniel said. “But your brother’s been all over socials, having a fucking party.”
“I don’t think that’s a bad thing,” I said as I went back to my run. “Brown’s a dickhead to Alexio, and Jonah will literally do a murder to protect his boyfriend.”
Dan snorted, and I heard him start the machine next to me. He was quiet as he began his run, and when he spoke, he sounded slightly winded. “You know he was the one who started that petition to get Ben fired?”
I winced. I knew. Of course I knew. Noah hadn’t been quiet about his opinion on blind coaches, which was fucking ridiculous, considering he had nothing to do with our league, but the worst part was the fact that he had support from other sighted coaches in the PPHL.
Like Ben said before, he and I were friends, and he had come to me in a seething rage when he was called into the GM’s office about it. He’d been shaking, not crying, though I could hear the thickness in his voice, telling me he was barely holding it all back.
It was hard for me to stay calm about it. Ben and I were close. We shared similar childhood experiences…oh, and an ex—sort of. It was hard to consider Journey an ex when we did nothing more than flirt, have three dinner dates, and one very failed attempt to fuck.
But that’s what he called me, so…
“When is his last day? And has there been any noise about a replacement?”
I slowed my speed for the cooldown and took a calming breath.
I was happy for Alexio. Noah was a raging asshole to his players, and no one liked him.
If he’d been a good coach, I could understand the reason they kept him for so fucking long, but he wasn’t.
The Glaciers had so much fucking potential, especially since their recent acquisitions.
All of it was in spite of Noah.
“No one’s said anything. You should ask Ben if he knows. Or text Alexio. Or maybe Vanya.”
Fuck. I had no idea if Daniel was capable of seeing the flinch I gave, but I couldn’t help it. My entire body burned with the memory of Vanya and everything he did to me. My ass was sore, my muscles were like jelly, and all I wanted was more.
Which could absolutely not fucking happen again.
“I have a meeting with Ben later today. I’ll ask him,” I said, distracting myself as best I could. I needed to find out who the fuck let my stalker through the security gates twice anyway, and Ben was the one who could do that kind of digging.
He was nice, and sighted people found him ridiculously attractive—obvious in the fact that they tended to give him whatever he asked for.
And it would possibly keep me from thinking about Vanya. At least until our game was over.
I stilled my legs and waited for my body to catch up to the fact that I was no longer moving, and then I stepped off and held the handle while the room swayed back and forth under my feet.
It took a moment for me to gain my full balance, and then I grabbed my towel and swiped all the sweat off the back of my neck.
“You gonna be here a while?”
“Mm. I need to get my steps in before practice,” Daniel said.
I wrinkled my nose and grabbed my water bottle, chugging enough to make my stomach hurt, before snatching my cane from the wall. “I’m gonna shower and make a few calls. See you on the ice for drills.”
He muttered something like a goodbye in French, but I wasn’t paying close attention. I patted my pocket for my phone, then pulled it out and tapped my earbud to turn it on before finding Ben’s number.
When I’d gotten to the arena, he wasn’t in his office, and I didn’t want to wait around all day.
“Micah? Tell me there’s not a crisis.”
“Not really. I heard about Brown though.”
Ben burst into laughter. “Yeah. I didn’t mind waking up to that news.”
I grinned as I turned the corner and stepped into the locker room. I turned my head from left to right, but I was pretty sure I was alone, which was good because I was in no mood for conversation.
“Is that what you wanted to talk to me about?” he asked.
“Oh, uh…” I set my cane against my stall and grabbed my towel. “Are you here? Some shit happened, and I need your help.”
“Tell me you’re not feuding with another player,” he begged.
That was…fair, really. But luckily, I was keeping to myself this season. “No.”
“And you’re not in some messy breakup? You didn’t fuck someone’s husband, or—”
“Jesus, dude.” That one hurt.
“Sorry.” He didn’t sound sorry, and it was partly my fault because I was the one who’d cultivated that reputation. “But yeah, I’m here. You want to meet me in my office?”
“Mm. I’m gonna shower off my stank, and then I’ll be in.” I hung up before he could make another cutting remark about how slutty I was. Normally, I could take it. Today, I was feeling tender.
I got through my shower without being interrupted, though by the time I was pulling on a pair of jeans and a T-shirt, I could hear people starting to arrive.
I wasn’t usually the person at the arena first, and I didn’t want to answer questions about why, so I grabbed my shit and hurried into the hall, making my way toward the coaches’ hallway.
Ben was the fifth door on the left, and I absently followed the sound of my cane hitting the edge of the wall as I counted them off.
I touched the braille on the plaque just to make sure I was at the right spot, then tapped my knuckle on the heavy wood and walked in without waiting for him to invite me.
“I’m at my desk,” he said.
His office had a simple layout—his desk, a table where he had his tactile rink maps, and a single chair with a sagging cushion that desperately needed to be replaced. But the discomfort was familiar, which soothed me as I sat down and leaned my cane against the edge of his desk.
Silence settled—thick, almost tangible.
Then Ben cleared his throat. “Do I need to beat it out of you, or—”
“Who bought the Glaciers?” I blurted.
Ben was silent for a long, heavy beat. “I’m not supposed to say just yet…”
“Benjamin.”
He groaned. “Fine. But if this gets out, I’ll know it was you, and I’m gonna let him kick your ass.”
I braced myself. I had no idea who it could be, but I didn’t like the anticipation.
“Journey did.”
My heart sank a little. Journey and I were…well. Complicated. We were friends, but he also didn’t really know me, and I wasn’t sure I ever wanted him to.
“That’s good for Alexio, I guess. Firing Noah is going to make their lives a lot easier.”
Ben sighed. “Seems so. Is that what you dragged my happy ass down here for?”
I bared my teeth, grateful he couldn’t see the lie on my face. “Yes.”
“You’re lying.”
Damn it.
I wanted to smack him. Instead, I sat back in my chair and folded my arms over my chest. “There was an incident last night. And the night before that.”
“Incident?” Ben echoed.
“Someone got past security. I—” The words froze in the back of my throat.
When I was silent for too long, I heard Ben sit forward, making his dog jolt with a loud snort. “Micah. What happened?” I could hear it in his tone. He was worried.
I let out a puff of air. “Can you just do me a favor and look into it? A guy came in driving an SUV. I think it’s black. Cadillac,” I added. I didn’t know anything else about it.
“And the guy?”
“Uh. Tall. Wavy hair of some color, a nose, a mouth, two eyes. Skinny—”
“Micah, not to sound like a dick, but that won’t help the security guard.”
“Fuck. I know. But even if he had described himself to me, he’d lie about it.”
“Did anyone else see him?” Ben asked.
Fuck my fucking life. “Yes,” I told him grudgingly. “Ivan Maximov.” Oh god, they were going to look at the cameras, and whoever was checking up on things was going to see Vanya kissing me. Or not quite kissing me, but very much making it look like he was.
And it was definitely going to look like I wanted it. Because I did.
And still do.
“Vanya,” Ben said, then let out a small laugh. “He was here looking for you.”
“Yeah. He walked me out to the parking lot the first night and saw the whole thing. And he was at the game last night when it happened again.”
Ben drummed his fingers on the desk. “So who is this guy? Jilted lover?”
My stomach roiled at the thought of calling Hunter my lover. “More like stalker.”
“I can’t tell if you’re being serious,” Ben said, his voice dropping low.
I groaned. “Fuck, Ben. Can you just check into it for me, please? I need to know how he got past security because he does not work here, he doesn’t have a badge, and I very much doubt he was able to get a pass.”
“If you’re in some kind of trouble—”
“I can handle it!” I snapped, then forced myself to take another calming breath. “I will beg if you really want me to. Or I can go to security myself. But I’d rather have you do it. So, please.”
“Okay.”
I froze. I was expecting him to keep fighting me. “Yeah?”
“Micah, you’re my friend. Of course I’ll do this. But if you’re in some kind of danger—”
“I’m not, and I really can handle it.” The words curled around my tongue, sharp like the lie it was. “I just need to know if someone is letting him in.”
“Alright,” Ben said softly. “I’ll see what I can find out, and I’ll let you know.” He stopped, then cleared his throat. “You good for the game tonight?”
I rolled my shoulders back and then stretched. “Never fucking better.”
“That’s what I want to hear. Now, get the fuck out of my office and find something else to do.”