Chapter 18
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
~SHAWN~
T he sun streams into the room. I can see it, even through closed eyes. I take a deep breath and frown at the unfamiliar scents filling my nostrils.
I roll to my back and open my eyes, and the past several hours flood my mind.
Lexi.
I’m with Lexi.
I grin and roll toward her but find the bed next to me empty. Which isn’t unusual where we’re concerned. During the month we spent together, we regularly woke up and left the bed to work, grab something to eat, or think while letting the other sleep.
I hope she’s either ordering or fetching us some coffee.
I sit on the edge of the bed and listen, but I don’t hear any movement in the suite. I use the restroom, and when I return to the bed, I reach for my phone and shoot her a text.
Me : Please tell me you’re foraging for caffeine. There’s a great little shop called Cherry Street Coffee. Grab cinnamon rolls, too.
I watch the screen after I hit send and frown when the text doesn’t go through.
What in the hell?
I rub my hand over my face and glance around the room, and every hair on my body stands on end.
I don’t see any of Lexi’s things.
A frenzied look in the closet and bathroom confirm that all of her belongings are gone. As is she. She isn’t out looking for breakfast at all.
She left.
“Fucking hell,” I mutter as I retrieve my phone once again.
Me : Never mind. You’re gone. Again.
I might as well take a shower and clear the cobwebs from my brain. I can’t believe I was so stupid. I thought I’d have a few days with her, at least.
I hoped to talk her into extending her stay so I could take her to the island for a little while. Maybe the cabin. I wanted more time.
I just wanted more.
It’s clear that Lexi doesn’t feel the same way about me as I do about her. For fuck’s sake, we had one night together again, one of the best nights of my life, and she ran away.
She doesn’t want me.
And as much as that hurts my ego and my heart, it’s a truth that I need to accept and move on from.
She couldn’t be clearer in her decision.
“I haven’t seen you in a while,” Maggie says when I answer the door to her knock. She has my brother Kane’s dog, Murphy, with her, and they both come inside.
Murphy wags his tail as I scratch him behind the ears, then he curls up on my couch for a nap.
“I’ve been working,” I reply and lead Maggie to the kitchen, where I finish making myself a sandwich. “Hungry?”
“Yes.” She reaches over and snatches my sandwich off the plate and takes a big bite. I stare at her. “What?”
“I was going to make you one.”
“I’ll have just the one, thanks. I’ll be stuffed after this.” Her smile is smug. She’s such a pain in my ass.
Has been since the day she was born.
I get to work making another sandwich. The sound of Murphy’s snores fills the room. Maggie isn’t talking, she’s just watching me, chewing on her pastrami and rye.
“So, you’re just here because you haven’t seen me in a while?”
“You haven’t been at the pub in a week.”
“Keegan hasn’t needed me.”
“But you usually come anyway.”
I finish the sandwich and take a bite. “I told you, I’ve been working.”
“You’re also really grouchy.”
I narrow my eyes and continue chewing.
“See? You’re not even speaking to me. I mean, I know you’re on the quiet side, but this is excessive even for you, Shawn Michael O’Callaghan.”
“Only Ma gets to use my middle name and get a reaction.”
“We can call her if you’d like,” she offers with a saccharine-sweet smile. “Or, you can make it easy on yourself and tell me what has your knickers all up in a wad.”
I laugh and finish the last bite of my sandwich. She’s still eating hers, so I lean on the counter and cross my arms over my chest.
“My knickers , as you so delicately put it, are not in a wad.”
“Talk to me. I’m your sister. I love you, and I can keep a secret.”
“You told Ma that I was the one who broke that expensive plate of hers when I was nine. After you swore you wouldn’t tattle on me.”
“I was young and impressionable,” Maggie says with a shrug. “Besides, you were only grounded for a week for that.”
“Yeah, the week of Patrick Simpson’s birthday party, when they were going to the laser tag place, and I had to stay home.”
She winces, which gives me immense satisfaction. “I said I was sorry.”
“There’s nothing going on,” I reply and put my dirty dishes in the dishwasher. “I really am neck-deep in a project, and I just haven’t had time to get to the pub. But if you ever need me, all you have to do is call.”
“I know that,” she says, waving me off. “How did it go in Seattle a few weeks ago when you got to see Lexi?”
I press my lips together and stare at her.
“I knew this weird mood had to do with her.”
“I’m not in a bloody weird mood.”
“Did it not go well? Was she not excited to see you? You haven’t talked about how you left things before, so maybe it was uncomfortable and awkward?”
“You should be a writer,” I mumble, deadpan. “You have a great imagination.”
“I wouldn’t have to use my imagination if you’d just tell me what happened.”
I walk into the living room and over to the windows that look out to the ocean and shove my hands into my pockets.
It’s true, I have been working like crazy since that night a couple weeks ago with Lexi. But I’ve also spent plenty of time standing right here, staring out at the waves.
I turn around to find Maggie snuggled up with Murphy on the sofa, waiting patiently for me to open up to her.
Maybe talking it out would help, because keeping things to myself all this time certainly hasn’t been a cure for the post-Lexi blues.
“The meeting was good,” I begin and sit in a chair across from my sister. “We got a lot of things about the project ironed out. Lexi looked amazing, as usual. Maybe even more so than before.
“I took her to dinner, and then I spent the night with her.”
Maggie’s green eyes light up. “Way to go, big brother.”
“And then she proceeded to pack up her stuff and split in the middle of the night.”
Her face falls. “Yikes.”
“Yeah. Yikes . So, I’m going to go ahead and assume that she’s not interested in pursuing anything with me.”
She blinks at me and then frowns. “But did you call and ask her why she left?”
“No.”
Her eyes narrow. “What did you say to fuck it up?”
“I didn’t say anything. Christ, Mary Margaret, I’m not an asshole.”
“Well, something went wrong for her to just up and sneak out in the middle of the bloody night, Shawn. Women don’t usually do that.”
“If I remember correctly, Anastasia did exactly that to Kane, remember?”
“That’s different,” she says, waving me off.
“Why?”
“Because Kane can be an asshole, so him losing women in the middle of the night doesn’t surprise me. You, on the other hand, are a different story altogether. Do you even care?”
“Do I care about why she ghosted me? Of course, I do.”
She rubs her hands through her hair in agitation. “Okay, let’s back up. Before you had sex, I assume you had a conversation.”
I clench my jaw and glare at my sister.
“What did you say?”
“I told her I wasn’t going to marry her.”
“For fuck’s sake, Shawn. Of course, she left.”
“It’s an inside joke.” I stand and pace the living room. “When we first started sleeping together, as co-workers, we agreed that it was just a physical relationship for us to enjoy while we worked together. I said that then. And when I saw her a couple weeks ago, I said it again.”
“Because you’re a moron.”
“I will throw you out of here on your little butt, Mary Margaret.”
“Right. I’m terrified. Shawn, if you don’t want anything with Lexi, why are you all messed up over your last encounter with her? I don’t get it.”
“I didn’t say I don’t want anything with her,” I reply in frustration.
“You’re in love with her.”
I stop pacing and stare at Maggie. I feel the blood leave my face.
“That’s what it is. You’re worked up because you’re in love with her, and you screwed it up, and she doesn’t want to have anything to do with you.”
“I’m not in love with her.”
“No? If that was the case, you wouldn’t give a monkey’s ass what her reaction was that morning. You’d just go on with your lonely little life.”
“I’m not lonely.”
“But you are in love with her, Shawn. And that’s why you’re upset. And defensive. And, honestly, you look like crap.”
“Thanks.”
“You need to go to her and talk to her. You have to communicate with her that you want more than a physical relationship. And you need to ask her what she wants. I have a feeling she’s in love with you, too. And when you said you weren’t marrying her, it hurt her feelings, and she went home. Which, if it were me, I’d do the same damn thing.”
“So, what? I just show up on her doorstep and say, ‘ Hey there, sorry to bother you, but I’ve changed my mind and I am in love with you, so…let’s have sex ?’”
Maggie stands, walks to me, and slaps me upside the head.
“Hey!”
“You’re so dumb. Why she loves you, I have no freaking idea. You show up and be honest with her. You don’t want to be with her just because the sex is amazing. So, no, I wouldn’t lead with that.”
“I was just kidding.”
“I can’t believe we come from the same gene pool.”
“Hey, I’m not that bad.”
“Well, you’ve managed to make an amazing woman like Lexi fall in love with you, so you can’t be all bad. In all seriousness, Shawn, you really do need to have a frank conversation with her. Open up to her and let yourself be vulnerable. Which, I know the men in this family have a hard time with. Although, Da’s becoming more sentimental in his older age.”
“I can be vulnerable. I’m an artist.”
She smirks. “Go get your girl. Because I love her, too. And I miss her. We all do. She fits so well with us, Shawn.”
“I know. I just hope I’m not too late.”
“If it’s meant to be, you’re not too late. I have faith in you.”
“You just said I’m a moron.”
“Well, you can be. But you’re also pretty great, and Lexi sees that. Just go talk to her.”
“Can you reserve me a flight while I pack?”
“Of course. I’m putting you in first class because you need drinks.”
“No drinks,” I disagree. “But first class is good. I’ll be in the front of the plane and can get off quickly.”
The Minneapolis airport is a shitshow. It’s enormous, difficult to navigate, and when I’m already impatient to get to my girl, it’s not good.
But, roughly nine hours after Maggie gave me the come-to-Jesus conversation, I’m in a rental car headed to Lexi’s building, having saved her address when I mailed her box. It’s after rush hour, so traffic is light.
I park in a visitor space and take the elevator up to her floor.
I knock on the door several times, but there’s no answer. So, I take out my phone and shoot Lexi a text.
Me : Hey, I’m at your front door. Please answer.
The text is delivered, but she doesn’t reply. I try again.
Me : Please come to the door, Lex. I need to talk to you.
Nothing.
I knock again, in case her phone isn’t near her. And as I’m waiting, the door across the hall from Lexi opens, and a little woman with white hair peeks out.
“Can I help you?” she asks.
“I know it’s late, and I’m sorry if I was loud and bothered you. I’m just trying to see Lexi.”
“Oh, well, she and her mother are out of town.”
I feel all the hope I’ve been carrying around with me all day drain from my body.
“They went to Florida to run in a race. I sure am proud of Lexi, she’s been doing so well with her running.”
“She’s amazing,” I murmur with a nod. “And now I remember her mentioning that she was going to Disney World this month. I just didn’t realize it was this weekend.”
“Do you want me to give her a message when she gets home?”
I shake my head no. “Do you happen to know which resort they’re staying at in Florida?”
She frowns. “Well, I’ve probably already said too much. I shouldn’t tell you that.”
“I’m Shawn O’Callaghan. And I’m in love with Lexi, ma’am. I’m trying to find her so I can talk to her and tell her how much I love her.”
“You’re the young man she spent time with in Washington.”
I nod eagerly. “That’s right. I’ll go get on a plane to Orlando right now, if you’ll just tell me where I can find her.”
She seems to think it over and then sighs. “I hope I’m doing the right thing. Lexi and her mom are staying at the Grand Floridian. Lexi went all out on the trip, wanting to make it extra special for her mama.”
“Thank you.” I’m so excited, I pull her in for a hug, and she laughs. “You’re wonderful.”
“Good luck to you, young man.”
I wave and jog back toward the elevator and call Maggie.
“I need you to book me on the next flight to Orlando.”
“I can’t tell you that, Mr. O’Callaghan.”
I sigh and stare at the woman named Starr behind the counter at the Grand Floridian. I’ve just checked into a room and asked her if she could tell me which room Lexi is in.
“Listen, I’ve come a long way to surprise her.”
“I’m sure you have, but we take the safety and privacy of our guests very seriously. I can’t tell you where she is, or if she’s still here.”
I tilt my head at the tone of her voice. “She’s not here?”
“I can’t confirm or deny that.”
“She came for the marathon race tomorrow.”
“The marathon was yesterday ,” she replies and offers me a small smile. But she doesn’t elaborate.
“So, she ran yesterday and already checked out.”
She just shrugs a shoulder, not actually confirming or denying the statement, as she said.
But that’s what happened.
Damn it.
“I may not need that room, after all. I just need to make a phone call.”
“I can cancel it without penalty after you make your call,” she says.
I turn away and pull my phone out of my pocket, frowning when I see texts from Maeve.
Maeve : Call me.
I dial her number and listen to the ring. She finally answers. “I’ve been trying to reach you for like an hour.”
“I was checking into a hotel in Florida, and trying to find out what room Lexi’s in. But I think she already left. So, I need you or Maggie to book me another flight to Minneapolis.”
“Would you stop talking for three seconds and listen ?” Maeve asks. “I just got off the phone with Da. Lexi and her mother are in Ireland, Shawn.”
Ireland? What in the bloody hell are they doing in Ireland?
“Shawn?”
“Looks like I’m moving my flight to Galway up from next week to right now. Can you help me?”
“Already on it. Just get yourself to the airport. Also? This is incredibly romantic.”
“Only if it works, Maeve. If not, I’m just a stalker.”
“A romantic stalker.”