Chapter Twenty-Five
AUDREY
I stood in the kitchen, hands on my hips, staring at Dallas. “What?”
He stared back at me, his gaze inscrutable. “I'm leaving for Boston,” he repeated.
“Oh,” I finally said, scrambling my thoughts together. Inside, I was reeling—angry, frustrated and hurt. I didn’t want him to leave. It hurt. I knew I’d been tiptoeing through dangerous territory with him, and now I knew why I should’ve backed away much sooner. “Does Thea know you're leaving?”
He nodded. “Yeah, I talked to her a few minutes ago. I spoke to Howard this morning. They arrested three guys on those burglaries, so you don’t need to worry about that.
Caught them in the act at a house on the other coastal road.
They fessed up on breaking in here as well.
I figure you and Thea might enjoy having a weekend together.
I'll get back to the office and then return for Christmas.
I'll probably stay at our house over Christmas.”
His tone was flat and controlled. It annoyed the hell out of me that he was so matter-of-fact.
This is fine. You knew there was an end date. It's just coming a little sooner than you expected.
My heart cried out, stomping its feet and essentially pitching a little tantrum and banging around inside my chest. My stomach churned. I didn't want Dallas to see the turmoil I felt inside, so I turned away quickly and needlessly started washing a few dishes in the sink.
“When are you leaving?” I asked.
Thea was upstairs in the shower. Dallas and I had coffee together like we usually did in the short time we'd been staying here together. Thea, as usual, slept in quite late. She was most definitely not a morning person. I'd been in the shower when she must've gotten up.
“I already said goodbye,” he said. “I'm just gonna run upstairs and grab my bag.”
I took a steadying breath, rinsing the plate in my hands and setting it carefully in the dish rack before I turned around. I hoped I'd schooled my expression into a calm one.
“Okay,” I said.
My vocabulary was failing me right now. There were so many things I wanted to say, but I couldn’t think of how to say any of them. I shouldn't feel uncomfortable. This shouldn't be a big deal, yet I was so disappointed.
You knew this was going to happen.
Yeah, but I thought we had two more weeks.
Well, now you don't. This is why you never should've let this happen.
I shook my thoughts away and swallowed against the knot in my throat.
“Well, I suppose you should get going,” I finally said.
Molly had been sitting in the middle of the kitchen floor.
She stood and came over to me, wagging her tail and sidling up against my leg.
I reached down to stroke her head. She might've only been with us for a short time, but I sensed she already knew me well enough to know when I was upset.
I only hoped her canine powers of observation were much stronger than Dallas' human powers.
He was more perceptive than the average person, but for once, I hoped like hell he couldn't see right through me.
He had that calm, distant expression on his face. He nodded tightly and turned away. I listened to his footsteps as he walked upstairs. I abruptly decided I would go for a drive. I didn't need to hang around to say goodbye. There was no sense in me hoping this was more than it had been.
I stuffed my feet in my boots, grabbed my jacket and keys, and called for Molly to come with me.
Jogging outside, I let her in the car and started it quickly.
As I rounded the circle at the end of the driveway and looked in the rearview mirror, I saw Dallas stepping out the front door.
I was just close enough to see the look of surprise on his face.
Fuck him. Maybe I’d been stupid enough to agree to the limits he’d set, but it didn't feel any better to mean so little to him.
I drove away quickly, concerned he might try to follow.
Once I was on the coastal road leading to town, I turned off on another side road that led to a hiking trail.
I pulled into the little parking lot at the end, put my car in park and just sat there.
My heart hurt. I felt so stupid. I’d fallen for Dallas a long time ago.
I’d stuffed the feelings so far away, they’d been invisible to me, and I’d forgotten how he affected me.
Molly nudged my shoulder. I stroked her head and buried my face in her fur, finally letting myself cry.
I wasn't sure what I was crying for. I didn't know if it was Dallas, or all the time that I’d wasted with Matthew. I felt tired and alone, and I’d been so stupid to let myself get close to Dallas.
I couldn't convince my heart not to care.
I leaned my head back against the seat after a few minutes and tried to gather myself together.
I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket and tugged it out.
Dallas' name flashed on the screen. I tapped the decline button and put my phone away.
It was best if he left. I didn't need to read anything more into this than I already had.
I waited a little bit, only to hear my phone buzz again. I lifted it to see a text from him.
No goodbye?
“Dallas, there is no goodbye. We’ll go back to the way things were for the last five years,” I said to no one other than Molly.
She cocked her head to the side as if trying to understand what I was saying, her brown eyes soft and curious.
“Human stuff. I was silly. I should’ve known better,” I offered to her in explanation.
I stroked Molly’s head, passing my hand down along her back. The bony ridges of her body were still easily palpable, but she was starting to gain some weight.
“Where should we go?” I asked, looking at her.
Molly had no answer, but she nudged my shoulder gently.
I pulled out of the parking area and headed for a beach nearby where I used to walk the last dog I had growing up.
It was usually deserted in the winter, and today was no exception.
We walked along the sand, watching the waves roll to the shore and crash against the rocks up ahead.
I savored the salty, icy air. Molly ran around like a maniac.
She was good about coming when I called, so I let her run ahead and then spin back to meet me. She was like a little canine boomerang.
Even though my heart still ached, I figured it was time to go back and face Thea.
I worried she would sense I was out of sorts.
Well, out of sorts didn’t quite capture it.
I felt like I’d had my heart stomped on, and it was all the worse for the fact I’d put myself in this situation to begin with.
I could blame it on Matthew. She didn't need to know I'd been silly enough to fall for her brother.