Chapter Twenty-Six
DALLAS
“What the hell?” I asked no one, tossing a file folder across my desk.
Cole poked his head around the door to my office. “Talking to yourself again?” he asked with a grin.
I rolled my eyes. “The team working on that money laundering investigation came up with a whole lot of nothing. It's been two weeks, and I was hoping they’d make some headway while I was gone.”
“Dude, you do not know how to take a vacation.”
“What do you mean?” I countered.
He stepped into my office, slipping into the chair across from my desk.
“You’ve been gone two weeks, and all you can do is bitch about what nobody did.
You know sometimes it takes months to catch a break on investigations.
Especially in finance cases. It's your specialty, you know this,” he said with a slow shake of his head.
I leaned back in my chair, running a hand through my hair. “I know. No need for me to get pissed over nothing.”
I stood abruptly and rounded my desk, stepping to the coffee pot in the corner. I quickly poured a cup, holding it up aloft. “Coffee?”
Cole shook his head. “I'm wired enough already, but thanks.”
I returned to my chair, slouching into it and taking a sip of coffee.
“What is it?” Cole asked when the silence started to stretch.
I angled my head to the side. “What do you mean?”
“You,” he said, lifting his hand as he gestured toward me before letting it fall.
“You’ve been a jerk, to put it bluntly, ever since you've been back.
You're cranky as hell and irritated about everything. This isn't like you. One of the reasons you’ve had a solid team all these years is because you're easy to work with. If you keep this up, it won’t stay that way.”
I stared at him. “That bad?” I asked.
Cole nodded vigorously. “Oh yeah, man. You're like the office cactus right now. No one wants to get too close.”
I burst out laughing. “All right. Fair enough. Guess I gotta work on my attitude.”
Cole shrugged. “You don't have to. If you want to cultivate a reputation as an asshole…”
“Not what I'm after,” I said with a roll of my eyes.
“Wanna talk about what's going on?”
I held his gaze for a moment, suddenly recalling my conversation with Russ back in Haven’s Bay.
Cole was the very friend Russ had been referencing when he said one of my buddies from work had a family.
I’d been Cole’s best man at his wedding three years ago.
He and his wife had a two-year old and a baby now.
He’d found a way to juggle the needs of his family and his job and make it work.
It’s not as if I hadn’t known this, yet I hadn’t contemplated what it could mean for me.
I’d so effectively shut off the idea of settling down because once I’d known Audrey was engaged, I’d told myself it was for the best. Everything had changed now.
“How's Shelly?” I asked abruptly.
Cole didn't miss a beat and accepted the change in topic. “She’s good. Sara’s sleeping through the night finally, so life is great.
” He laughed softly. “If you ever do settle down and have kids, trust me when I say you’ll hardly sleep when they're babies. I was tired as hell all the time until they made it through the night. Your standard for a good night’s sleep gets so low that if you make it for four hours, it’s like ‘oh sweet Jesus, that was heaven.’ I think I had my first full night of sleep in a year and a half the other night.
Those people who talk about how great it is that their baby sleeps through the night?
They should be slapped,” he said with a laugh.
I chuckled along with him and took a gulp of my coffee. “I could handle the sleepless nights. I've never been much of a sleeper as it is.”
“Well, there's a mark in your favor. Tell me how come you're back from your vacation early.”
I shrugged. “No need for me to stay. Thea’s there now. They arrested the guys responsible for all the break ins. Audrey’ll be there past the New Year anyway. Just no reason for me to stay.”
Cole nodded slowly and picked up a pen from my desk, flipping it back and forth between his fingers. “Something up with you and Audrey?”
“No. Why do you ask?” I countered, instantly guarded.
“Because Thea mentioned it to me when she stopped by to pick up those files you wanted the other day. She thinks something might be going on. You know Thea. She’s worried about Audrey and you at the same time.”
Oh, did I ever know Thea. I rolled my eyes. “Look, it's no big deal. I might've stepped in it, but I can straighten it out.”
Cole arched a brow. “What do you mean?”
I sighed and leaned back in my chair. “I might've let something happen.”
Cole was quiet for a beat, his gaze considering. “By something, I assume you mean you screwed around with her.”
“Look, I…” Fuck. I hated knowing Thea was nosing around, and I hated having Cole look at me like I was some ass. “Audrey knows there's no room in my life for anything other than something casual. It's probably best I came back early.”
Cole held my gaze, shaking his head slowly. “Not if she's the reason you're such a fucking asshole,” he said.
“Man, I'm just tired, okay? Give me a few days to get back into the swing of things.”
“See, that's the thing. You're not supposed be tired after two weeks off, so either you were burning up the sheets and not getting any sleep, or you're not tired and you're just cranky because you might actually want more than a few nights in bed with her.”
I wanted to swear and tell him to shut the fuck up, but that might just prove his point. I played it cool and shrugged it off. “Leave it alone. I’m fine.”
“Fair enough,” he finally said. “Work on your attitude in the meantime.”
At that, he stood and left. I leaned my elbows on my desk and ran both hands through my hair before straightening.
I took another gulp of coffee, my eyes landing on the clock above the door.
It was going on seven o'clock at night. I was restless and antsy. It was fairly common for me to work until eight or nine at night, but I didn't even want to be here. I was too distracted and too frustrated. I missed Audrey. I hated that I hadn't gotten a chance to say goodbye. She’d taken that chance away from me and hadn’t answered a single text or call since then. I wanted to ask her why the hell she wouldn’t let me say goodbye.
I wanted to ask her all kinds of things. But I didn't.
Give it a few weeks. You’ll be back to your game.
I wanted to punch that voice because, right now, I was pretty damn sure a few weeks wouldn’t make the ache in my heart go away.