Epilogue
AMBER
SIX YEARS LATER
I was way too fucking young to be having a mid-life crisis. As I stared at the grinning doctor congratulating me on my third pregnancy, I wanted to cry.
Ryan was going to kill me.
We had decided two years ago after the birth of our second son that our hearts were full and so was our home. We had been safe… except on Valentine’s Day. Fuck! They said all it took was one time, and I was quickly finding out that was true.
One fucking time.
“The chances are low for twins, right?” I asked the older woman, who laughed. She’d been my doctor for over six years now, helping me and Ryan with our first set of twins, Mason and Madeline, and then our next son, Nicolas. She knew our little family well.
“Once you’ve had one set of twins, anything is possible.” That was not what I wanted to hear. We would have to move into a bigger house. As it was, the boys were already getting rowdy while having to share a room. We weren’t financially prepared for another child, and God help me if it was twins .
“Take a deep breath, my dear. Stress isn’t good for the little one. Remember, God always has a plan for us. Don’t fret.” She placed her weathered hand on top of mine, and instantly, I calmed down.
Over the years, I had learned how to control my anxiety, to breathe when told, and to understand that I didn’t have control over everything as much as I wanted, to stop worrying about how to make sure everything was perfect. This was out of my hands.
“Can we check today?” The woman checked her watch and then looked at the computer screen.
“In an hour. Why don’t you call your husband? I’m sure Mr. Wilson will want to be a part of this, my child.”
“I’ll wait outside. I need to take a walk. He isn’t going to be as happy as the first time, I promise you.”
“He might surprise you.” The older woman smiled.
Walking out of the room, I followed her to the reception area, where she hugged me tightly before excusing herself to see another patient.
Stepping out into the hot, spring day, I was instantly suffocated by the immense heatwave we had been experiencing. Fighting back tears, I pulled out my phone and hit Ryan’s contact.
He answered quickly—he always did, no matter what he was doing.
“Ames?” His gentle tone shook my control, and the first tear rolled down my cheek.
“Oh, Ryan,” I whimpered.
“What’s wrong, baby?” Twelve years later, and his voice still set my blood on fire and made my heart pound a little faster.
“I’m pregnant,” I whispered into the phone, sitting down on a hot bench that burned through my jeans.
There was silence, and then, something shattered before he finally said something. “Well, this wasn’t planned.”
“Can you come to the doctor’s office?” I timidly asked. “I have an appointment for the first ultrasound in an hour.” I heard the rumble of his truck start through the phone and a sigh. He was coming. He wasn’t mad at me. We would take this in stride like everything else in our lives.
“I’ll be there in ten. I love you.”
I smiled, the tightness in my chest easing. “I love you, too.”
True to his word, he arrived ten minutes later. I hadn’t moved from my spot on the bench, just staring at the sky, trying to imagine what was going through his head and what we were going to do. Three kids were hard enough, and now, we would have four. We wouldn’t all fit in his truck or my car anymore. Fuck, this was a nightmare.
He came and sat next to me, dirty from working in the shop with his dad. He reached for my hand that was resting on my bouncing knee and held it tightly. “Valentine’s Day, huh?” He laughed, shaking his head, immediately knowing the cause for this little surprise.
I studied his handsome face, which had only gotten better with age. “I’m sorry,” I quickly apologized. “I should have?—”
He pulled me into his chest, wrapping his arms around me and pressing my face to his chest. I inhaled the familiar, comforting scent of his cologne and tried to calm my racing heart.
“This isn’t your fault.” He pressed his lips to the top of my head. “Don’t apologize for being pregnant, for giving me another child—another version of us. I love you, Amber, and after everything we’ve been through, this is God blessing us with another angel.”
“But four, Ryan?” I squeaked. “We’ll need new cars, a bigger house—everything is going to change.” I pulled away from his damp shirt that was now wet from my tears and stared into his blue eyes.
He smiled the same grin that he flashed me all those years ago when I met him for the first time. “It’s time for a new house anyway, and I know you’ve been hinting at that new SUV for a while now.” I blushed under his gaze.
So, he had noticed my subtle hints. I thought he was blind or ignorant. Nope. Turned out, he was just ignoring me.
He checked his watch before grabbing my hand and rising from bench, taking me with him. “Come on. It’s too hot outside for you and our little one.” He rested a hand on my stomach and leaned forward to kiss me, his lips soft on mine, always a gentleman.
The wait for my ultrasound appointment was short, and once we were settled into the room again, I held my breath as they began the ultrasound.
“Oh, boy, you two are going to have a handful on your hands.” The doctor laughed just as Ryan and I heard the sound of two heartbeats fill the room. “Looks like you’re having twins again!”
“Twins?!” I shouted, my eyes colliding with Ryan’s. This wasn’t fucking happening—not again. We barely survived the first time, and we were young then.
“Congratulations!” our doctor cheered.
Two weeks later, we still hadn’t told a single soul the news. We’d put our house on the market and spent the last two weekends searching for something bigger and with more land, which seemed impossible if we wanted to remain close to Ryan’s family.
Celine and Ace were hosting a barbeque today, and we decided it was the perfect time to finally tell everyone the good news.
Two weeks had given me time to come to terms with it, to understand the blessing in disguise, and to become excited at the thought of two new babies. I only prayed that we would be graced with little girls. I was already outnumbered with two boys to one little girl.
“Mommy, can I wear my new dress?” Maddi, my six-year-old terror, stared up at me with her father’s big blue eyes and my red, untamable hair flowing down her back in big knots.
“Yes, honey. Do you need help changing?” I was busy curling my hair and watching her through the mirror of my vanity as she struggled out of her princess pajamas.
Suddenly, just a few days ago, she started to want to dress herself, and I wasn’t allowed to help because it was, “ Embarrassing, Mommy”.
She shook her head, and eventually, five minutes later, she figured out how to get her shirt off and pull the pink, frilly dress over her head.
“Can you make my hair look pretty?” She bounced over to me, forgetting to zip up the back of her dress.
Ryan walked into the room at that moment and grinned at me, making my heart pound in my chest. This man of mine would forever have the same effect on me. Of that, I was sure.
“Oh, my! How I do love hot pink panties,” Ryan teased. “Maybe I should get some.” Maddi’s cheeks reddened, and she quickly turned around to hide her back as she stared at Ryan.
“Daddy! Don’t look!” she squealed, coming to stand next to me. He threw his head back and laughed.
“Come here, squirt. Let Momma get ready, and I’ll help you.” She glanced at me and waited for my nod of approval before running into his extended arms.
“Be careful with my new dress, Daddy. Mommy just bought it for me. I want to look extra pretty today.” She let him zip up the back of her dress and then handed him her brush from the bed. He sat there and carefully brushed through her knots while I finished my makeup.
“I think you should let Mommy tie it up. You know I’m not good with the fancy updos.” She giggled and hugged him tightly, warming my heart.
“I love you, Daddy, but you’re right. You aren’t good with hair.” I laughed. She was so blunt. Her personality was a perfect mirror of mine. She brought her brush over to me, and I fashioned her hair into a braid to keep it out of her face for the day and to keep the tangles and knots out of it.
She ran out of the room a few minutes later, screaming for Mason, her twin. “Did you bring the kooky pens? I wanna show Summer our collection!” she hollered down the hall.
“Don’t wake your brother!” I called after her, not wanting to wake Nicolas up until the last minute. Otherwise, he would be cranky the entire day. Out of all my children, Nicolas was the one who loved his sleep the most.
I stood up from my vanity, looking myself over in my white, spring dress. Ryan came up behind me and wrapped his arms around my slightly but barely noticeable swollen stomach, resting his chin on my shoulder, his lips brushing my cheek.
“You look so fucking sexy when you’re pregnant. I just want to spend the whole day with you in bed.” He kissed my check before moving my hair aside and kissing my neck. “You smell so good, baby,” he groaned.
I blushed, leaning into his touch. Oh, how I loved this man. “I’m wearing the perfume you bought me for Valentine’s Day,” I told him.
He inhaled again, a low hum sounding from his throat before he reluctantly released me. “I’ll go wake the beast and get him ready.” He pecked my cheek. “I made some waffles for the kids. Do you want to just add the syrup and cream?”
“You know how much I hate giving them waffles before a family event. The last time, they ran circles around everyone!” He laughed, his arms circling back around me, his hands fanning out over my stomach.
“It’s a special day. I figured it would be okay. Plus, this time, I’m sticking them in the pool to get all that energy out, so I have you all to myself tonight.”
“Oh, so you have it all planned out, Mr. Wilson?” I teased, turning around in his arms. I ran a finger across his freshly shaved jaw.
“Yes, Mrs. Wilson. I know exactly what I want to do to you once we get home tonight, and it requires three sleeping children to accomplish it, my little spitfire.”
I swayed at the illusion behind his sinful words. This man knew exactly how to make me long for him. He had known how for years now, and he still used it to his advantage.
“Go wake Nicky up, you dirty man.”
“ Your dirty man, Ames,” he huskily reminded me. He released me again and smacked my ass. I squeaked in shock, and he winked before walking out of our bedroom.
An hour later, we had the kids loaded into the backseat of Ryan’s truck and were starting the short drive to Celine’s house. The kids were arguing in the back, like always, loud shrieks leaving their lips as they elbowed each other. I glanced at Ryan, who was glaring at them through the rearview mirror. I reached for his hand and wrapped my fingers around his.
“Quiet now, or Daddy and I will leave you at home and go to the party without you.” I craned my neck around to glare at the three scowling children.
I turned up the volume on the radio and sang along to the new pop song playing, and then, the whole cab filled up with the kids belting out the lyrics at the top of their lungs. They were off-key and sounded horrible, but it was better than them screaming and arguing with each other. Plus, the sound of innocent children having fun warmed my heart.
A few minutes later, Ryan pulled into the driveway, and we both turned to look at our grinning kids. “On your best behavior now, do you understand me?” Ryan said, looking pointedly at the twins, who somehow always got into trouble. They all nodded their little heads—even little Nicky, who laughed at his dad.
I opened the door of the truck and stepped out into the hot spring day, a light breeze tousling my hair and blowing the ends of my dress up. Ryan came around the front of the truck, holding Nicky in one burly arm and our cooler in the other. I swung the kids’ beach bag onto my shoulder and followed him up the drive to the front door, where Summer was already waiting, bouncing on her heels in a light blue dress, screaming for Maddi.
“Mads! Mads! You won’t believe what my mom bought me!” Her blonde hair swished back and forth from her high ponytail as she ran for Maddi, who was also running up the steps to greet her cousin.
“Tell me! Tell me!” Maddi giggled as the two embraced, almost colliding into each other and falling on their asses.
Celine was standing at the door, her hand on her hip as she smiled at our girls. “Long time, no see.” She grinned, wrapping me up in a tight hug as I got to the threshold. As always, the woman was dressed to impress in a floor-length, silk, turquoise dress, her blonde hair pulled back into a ponytail much like her daughter, and her makeup was styled with neutral colors that enhanced her striking, blue eyes.
“I’ve missed you, girl!” When we pulled apart, she glanced at my stomach, and I froze. There was no way she could tell. I even chose a loose dress so that no one could see the slight bump.
“This dress is totally your color.” She must have seen the look in my eyes because she smiled, her eyes twinkling with excitement. She knew. Somehow, my best friend always knew.
“Hello to you, too, sis.” Ryan laughed, bending slightly to wrap an arm around her.
“Hey, Ryan. Oh, look at you, little man! Come to Auntie Cece!” she cooed at Nicky, pulling him into her arms. “He’s gotten so big, Ames!”
I laughed. This girl was the definition of an exaggeration. She had seen us a week ago, and Nicky had certainly not grown in a week.
“Come on. Let’s get in the pool already. It’s so damn hot.” Ryan sighed, shooting me a wink at the excited squeals from the children.
“Ace is out back with Mom and Dad. I’ll help Ames with the kids. Charlie Danvers, where are you?” She called for her son. Something crashed to the floor upstairs before his little footsteps were heard pounding down the stairs.
The littlest Danvers stood before us, his cheeks flushed, his blue eyes wide with excitement as he bounced on his little feet. “Sorry, Ma.” He hugged Celine around the leg before rushing over to Mason, and the two quickly started to show each other their new fidget spinners.
“Time for the pool, little ones.” I handed the beach bag to Maddi, who took out her swimsuit and then passed Mason his before racing each other to the cabana bathroom, dropping the bag in their haste. Summer and Charlie raced up the stairs, their little feet pounding against the wood floor in excitement.
Celine bent down to pick the bag up before glancing at me with a wide, shit-eating grin. “So, how far along are you?” The glimmer of excitement in her eyes made me smile.
“How’d you know? You ruined my surprise, bitch!” We both looked at Nicky, who was trying to pull the bag from my hands so he could get his trunks, too.
“Language!” she hissed with a laugh.
“Let me change him, and then, we can talk.” She nodded, looking at my hidden belly with a soft smile.
I took Nicky into the guest room and changed him into his little, blue trunks with sharks swimming around and a matching, long-sleeve swim shirt before letting him waddle out the room to find his daddy.
Celine was waiting for me in the kitchen with a glass of pink prosecco in her hand. “About two months,” I answered her previous question, and she squealed.
“Oh, now, I want another one. I think we have room for one more. What happened to no more after Nicky?” She laughed, a familiar twinkle in her eyes as she took a sip of the bubbly.
“Ask Ryan what happened on Valentine’s Day,” I told her, and she giggled. “The man forgot to wrap it up!” We both laughed as I slid onto a barstool.
“Just one?” I shook my head, and her jaw dropped. “Twins again?!” she screamed, and I was afraid she’d completely dropped the bomb to everyone.
“Hush!” I snapped at her, frantically looking around. “He wanted to surprise you guys!”
“Oh, fuck. Now, I really want another baby. You’re going to have five kids, Ames! Five !”
“Don’t remind me,” I groaned. “You can take one of them if you want.” She laughed. “They all love you.” She shook her head.
“You really think I want one of your brats when I can still have another one or two, who will look just like my sexy husband?” She giggled.
She did have a point. I only wanted to have kids with Ryan. When I look at our boys and little girl and saw us perfectly reflected back, it warmed my heart.
“We’ll start trying tonight. Let’s see if we can be pregnant together. Wouldn’t that be the best?” she gushed.
I fought laughter. This woman would never grow up. “I thought Ace didn’t want more kids.”
She scoffed. “As if he ever had a choice about how many we have.” I laughed. “Plus, once we’re in the bedroom, I’m in charge, and I always get what I want when it comes to him.” She sighed, looking past me through the glass door at her husband, who was in the pool with their kids.
My eyes instantly landed on Ryan holding Nicky, trying to teach him to swim. Maddi was clinging to his shoulders, and her loud squeals could be heard through the door.
“I never thought I’d be this happy again, you know.” I looked at Celine, who smiled at me despite the tears starting to form in my eyes.
“You deserve every inch of this happiness, Ames.” She walked around the island to wrap me up in a hug, holding me in her thin arms, her love for me flowing out of her.
She really was the best friend I could ever ask for.
“Ryan arranged a surprise for you today, but you need to go outside and wait for it.” She pulled back with a watery smile.
“He’s going to make me cry, isn’t he?” She nodded, looking at her watch before helping me stand and pushing me to the door.
“I’ll be right there, hun.” I nodded, walking out into her big, fenced-in backyard that overlooked a small pond.
“Mommy! Come get in with me! You can be a mermaid with me and Summy!” Maddi screamed just as Mason went to dunk her. She popped up, scowling at her twin. “You suck, Mason!”
Everyone laughed as I settled onto the couch next to Ryan’s mother. “How are you, dear?” she asked me.
“Never been better.” I was watching my little family, the big grin on Ryan’s face, listening to the squeals of excitement from my kids. The only thing missing was my sisters and parents, who I hadn’t seen since Christmas.
“It’s so wonderful to see you this happy, my love, and you’ve given me the most beautiful grandchildren.” I looked back at her to see the same happiness reflecting in her eyes that I had in mine.
Ryan came and stood by me a moment later, dripping onto the floor at my feet as he reached for his towel next to me. “What about Nicky?” I glanced at our little boy, who was clinging to Ace.
“Ace is watching him while I go to the bathroom.” He pressed a kiss to my forehead. “Don’t worry, spitfire.” He grinned and then disappeared into the house. Celine stepped out a moment later and came to sit by me, handing me a pink lemonade.
“Don’t get dehydrated now,” she whispered, taking a seat next to her mom, glancing at the kids in the pool before looking back to me with a big smile.
“Amber!” Ryan called from the sliding door, where he was standing with my parents, sisters, their husbands, and their kids. My sisters squealed and ran over to me as I stood up just in time to be engulfed by my twin and two younger sisters.
“We missed you!” they all shouted in my ear at once, our bodies quickly becoming slick with sweat from the spring heat.
“I missed you guys, too!” I cried, looking over their heads to my sexy husband. Their kids had already jumped into the pool, the sound of laughter and greetings ringing throughout the backyard.
After I’d hugged my mother and father, I turned to Ryan with tears rolling down my cheeks. “I love you, Ames,” he said before getting down on his knee and pulling a little black box from his trunks pocket.
I shook my head, feeling lightheaded, butterflies swarming in my stomach.
“Marry me again? Make me the happiest man on this planet again and be my bride one more time, with our kids there to watch, to see what true love is? Let’s show our family and friends what finding your soulmate looks like, huh, baby?” He popped open the small, velvet box, and a big diamond ring sitting there, sparking in the spring sun.
“Ryan…” I whispered, completely overcome with emotion.
“I love you with every piece of me, Amber, and that love only grows every time I look at your stunning face and at the beautiful, courageous woman you have turned into. I want to see you walk down the aisle again and renew our vows. Marry me again?” he begged.
I nodded. “Yes, yes, yes! Oh, God. I love you, Ryan!” He jumped up and pulled me into his arms, twirling me around in front of our families. They cheered loudly. He put me down and pulled my wedding ring off my finger, putting it on my other hand to replace it with the new ring.
“Can I tell them?” he whispered, his head bent down, his lips just about to brush mine. I couldn’t think, so I nodded. I would say yes to anything this man asked me right now. He spun me around, so his hands were holding my swelling belly. Celine squealed. “One last surprise for you all,” he hollered, and I looked at our stunned families, my crying sisters, and Celine, who was full-on sobbing while clutching her mother’s hand.
“We’re pregnant with twins!” Ryan yelled.
Jaws dropped, but my heart was still beating fast, and all I could think about was the need to kiss my husband, to show him how much I loved this man. And so, I turned back around to face him, my chest brushing his. I leaned up on my tiptoes and brushed my lips against his, the familiar, rough scratch of his beard sending a tingle down my back, and then, his tongue swept across my bottom lip, and I moaned.
I pulled back, breathless, and looked up at him, seeing love shining in his blue eyes. My stomach fluttered, and my heart swelled in my chest.
“I love you… only you, Ryan.”
“And I love you… only you, spitfire.”
And he sealed that promise with another soul-twisting kiss.