24. Nakyra
Chapter 24
Nakyra
“ A re you sure you are okay? ” Summer signed. Her eyes bounced around my face with concern written all on her face. While I appreciated the fact that she was worried about me, I hated that she felt the need to. Our whole lives she’d looked out for me, but there were times when I hated that she still saw me as the kid who felt alone, craving love and attention from her parents.
“ I am. It is just an ear infection. I am used to it; stop worrying.” Every so often, when I got sick, it caused my ears to bother me more than normal. I was prone to ear infections and they typically passed within a few days with proper treatment. Since my ears were bothering me I chose to not wear my aids today, to give them some relief. “ I have an appointment with my doctor tomorrow. She will give me some drops to clear everything up.”
“ Do you need me to come with you?” Rolling my eyes, I grabbed the lemon cupcake off the table. We were at Sugar Bliss; she had just gotten off from her morning shift. Bella was with me today since I wasn’t wearing my aids. We were ducked off in a corner at one of the tables near the large front window. I hated bringing her into food places, but I had no other choice today.
“No, I am a big girl.”
“I know that, but you know the last time you went to see your doctor what she said.” Tomorrow, I had an appointment with my otolaryngologist. She was good at her job and I had been a patient of hers for years. Last time I saw her she was worried about my right ear possibly growing worse. I had been swamped with commissions and let an earache go untreated for too long, not thinking of the consequences. That was over a year ago and I hadn’t had any more issues since that appointment.
“ I will keep you updated, Summer. Do not worry.”
An apologetic smile formed on her face. “ I’m sorry. I just hate that things cannot be easy for you.”
I shook my head. “No need to be sorry. I love you and I know that you worry because you care.”
She spoke. “I do.”
Between signing and lip reading, I was good at communication when my ears failed me. I did worry sometimes that my hearing could get worse, and my aids would no longer be effective, but that was something I didn’t like to think about too much.
“ Okay… since we have that out the way. Update me on your life. What is going on? You went on a date, right?” She ended up connecting with one of the guys in Dylan’s crew when we went back to Bank Shot after the races. The two were ducked off for the majority of the night.
I read her lips. “It was nice. We went bowling, grabbed something to eat, and then hung out at one of the bars on The Shore.”
“ Do you like him?”
She nodded. “ I think so.”
I grinned. “ Good. ”
Since Summer was still fresh off a breakup, I knew she probably wasn’t looking for anything serious, but it didn’t hurt for her to hang out here and there. Summer was a serial dater anyway, until she found someone she was genuinely into.
“ What about you? How are you and C-R-E-E-D? ”
My heart skipped at the mention of his name. He’d been gone for six days and told me he would have to be gone a couple days longer than expected. I had been anticipating him coming back. I hated being home alone all the time and sleeping alone wasn’t great either. Rome wasn’t a cuddler. I’d learned early to stay on my side because he claimed he got too hot overnight. Creed was the opposite; he didn’t care if I clung to him or about my neediness. I didn’t even mean to do it but after our first night, he pulled me into him, and following that, my body naturally fell in line. We talked on the phone every day and FaceTimed every night, but it wasn’t the same.
“ Great. I am scared that I am moving too fast, but I cannot slow down. ”
“ And you should not. He seems to really like you. ”
I sank my teeth into my bottom lip, biting back a smile. “ I need to break things off with R-O-M-E. I have not even thought about him or the hospital recently. Does that make me a bad person? ”
Summer shook her head. “ No, of course not. You are human. Humans need affection and real love. C-R-E-E-D gives you what R-O-M-E did not. It is natural that you fell for it. ”
I sighed and tapped my fingers along the table. Summer was right; I knew it. Rome neglected my emotions; he wasn’t huge on physical contact. The longer we were together, the more he made that known. When we first got together, he was completely different. He was caring, charismatic, charming, and loving. Looking back now, I realized the longer we were together, those qualities started to fade away. I didn’t see it then, but now I did. I felt foolish for ignoring it all.
It had been three months that Rome had been in a coma, and almost a month and half since I had last seen him. Maybe I needed to try the hospital again to get an update. The wedding was still in play, but after all that’d happened I knew I needed to cancel it sooner rather than later. I hadn’t seen Dedra since that day at her office and wasn’t in a hurry to either. So many things were happening all at once. It felt like my life was in a whirlwind and I had no idea where it would end up, but I was sure a life jacket would be thrown at me soon.
____
I was in bed, asleep with the covers over my head, head throbbing, ears ringing, and wishing my body would magically heal itself. The lights were off and I had gotten black out curtains because the pain in my ear had traveled to my full face. For the past three days I had been bedridden. My ear infections turned out to be worse than I thought. Four days ago I saw my doctor and she was concerned. It didn’t help that my sinuses were draining as well, which caused even more pressure in my ears. My right ear was also red, swollen, and tender to the touch. I had to follow up with my audiologist now since it seemed my hearing in my right ear was at risk.
My eyes fluttered open when a hand began stroking my hair.
Turning and glancing up I was shocked to see Creed sitting on the edge of my bed. He was talking, but I was still half asleep and my aids weren’t in. It took a second for my eyes to adjust to the darkened room.
“Light,” I whispered, or hoped I did.
Creed nodded and stood, walking over to the light switch and flipping it on. I squinted and rubbed my eyes. Creed’s eyes searched the room and paused on my night stand.
“ What is going on? ” he signed once he noticed I wasn’t wearing my aids.
“ Not feeling well. I thought you would not be back for another couple of days.”
He gave me a sympathetic smile. “I only caught some of that,” he said.
I went to raise my hands to respond but paused and looked around until I located my phone. Unlocking it, I went to my text messages.
Me
Sinus infection and double ear infection. Feeling under the weather today so been in bed for the past couple days.
Creed bunched his brows, went into his sweats, and pulled his phone out. His fingers soon started tapping on the screen.
Creed
That’s why you declined my FaceTime calls. You told me it was just a cold. Why did you lie?
I didn’t want to worry you. It’s not the first time it’s happened.
His mouth turned upside down and he lifted his eyes and studied me.
What can I do to help you feel better? Are your ears bothering you?
I scanned the phone screen and gave him a small smile.
I went to the doctor, she gave me some drops and a steroid to help. Unfortunately my ear infections are worse than most people’s, so when they come they take me out of commission for a few days.
Creed walked back to the bed and took a seat on the edge. He reached over and stroked my jawline with his thumb.
“You should have told me how bad you were feeling.”
I didn’t want to worry you. I have to go see my audiologist next week. If you could go with me that would be great.
Creed read his phone screen and nodded.
“Just let me know when.”
My smile heightened a tad. I had taken pain medication before my nap and it took the edge off. My ears were still sore and ringing, which made everything uncomfortable.
I thought you wouldn’t be home for a couple more days.
Don’t tell me you aren’t happy to see me.
I read the screen and playfully rolled my eyes. Creed smirked.
I finished up everything sooner than I expected. The rest of the stuff is just paperwork I can do here.
Creed moved his hand up and around my head then leaned down, resting his forehead on mine.
“I missed you,” I uttered, hopefully softly.
“I missed you too.” Our lips collided.
Exhaling softly against his lips, it felt good to feel Creed’s lips again.
“ I brought you back something ,” he signed.
Curiously, I stared at him. He stood and grabbed bags close to the bedroom door. Kneeling, he dug through them before standing up. A grin was plastered on his face when he faced me. My eyes dropped to his hand and I noticed a white box.
Approaching the bed, he retook his seat on the edge and handed it to me. My brows furrowed as I slowly grabbed it.
My heart stuttered as I opened the box. A gasp fell from my mouth and my eyes widened seeing the beautiful, yellow diamond tennis necklace. I couldn’t pinpoint the price, but it was clear it was expensive.
My stomach plummeted.
Setting the box down, I lifted my hands. “What did you do? ”
My chest tightened, a knot grew in my throat.
His face balled up. “What are you talking about?”
I grabbed my phone again.
Did you buy this to make up for something you did back home? Did you sleep with someone else?
He eyed the phone and his jaw clenched. I wasn’t trying to upset him, but when Rome messed up or made me upset, he tried to buy me back as an apology.
Creed pulled his phone back out.
I’m going to say this once. I am not my brother. I got you this because I saw it and thought about you. I missed you and wanted you to see I was thinking about you. I’ll never try and buy you off if I fuck up.
I swallowed hard as guilt hit me. I believed Creed. I shouldn’t have thought he would do something like that, but getting random gifts wasn’t something I took pleasure in anymore. I lifted my hands again.
“Sorry.”
He shook his head and leaned down, kissing my forehead.
After a couple minutes Creed lifted and stared down at me. “ Tell me what you need.”
“ Hungry and Bella, bathroom.”
He nodded. “I’m on it, baby.”
Laying back down on my back I got comfortable in bed again. Summer would have come over if I called her, but after assuring her everything was fine before my appointment I couldn’t bring myself to call her. We had texted here and there, but that was it.
Bella hopped up from her bed and trotted out of the room behind Creed, who turned the lights back off before leaving the room.
____
“You know I never sugarcoat anything with you, Nakyra. I don’t like this,” Dr. Reynolds said. After some tests we were now sitting at her desk on the other side of the exam room. My ear infection was gone, but my right ear still had some lingering tenderness and swelling.
My head swung to the left to look at Creed who reached over and grabbed my hand. He had been great with taking care of me since he’d been back. He hardly let me out of bed, kept me equipped with hot compresses to help with the swelling in my ear, and rarely left my side. He worked out of my office for the most part, went to the hospital to check on his brother and his company one of the days, then was back at the house. A couple days after he returned I had started to feel better thanks to the medication I was on, but Creed insisted I continued to take it easy. Unfortunately, I could tell something wasn’t right when I was able to put my hearing aids back in and now Dr. Reynolds was confirming.
“How bad?” I whispered.
“Your right ear has worsened. Where before you could hear sounds as low as sixty-seven decibels, now you can’t hear anything lower than seventy-eight. I don’t like those numbers at all. I’ve looked over the notes from your otolaryngologist and it says your ears were bothering you for about a week before you saw him?”
“Not necessarily. There was some slight irritation, but nothing that alarmed me that something was wrong. I have sinuses and allergies so I figured one or the other was bothering me. It wasn’t until they became red, swollen to the point I couldn’t use my aids, that I knew something more was going on.”
She nodded and wrote something in my chart. “I’m going to adjust your hearing aids. Your left ear isn’t giving you any issues?”
I shook my head. “Once the medicine took effect, it went back to normal.”
“Okay, that’s good. Your numbers in that ear aren’t too different from last year.” She cleared her throat and folded her hands on the table. Her serious expression caused dread to fill my stomach like a hundred-pound weight. “I’m going to be honest with you, Nakyra, we might have to reevaluate how we’re treating your right ear. With it continuously worsening, we might need to look into other options.”
I swallowed hard. “Meaning?” Creed squeezed my hand.
“Meaning, if the new aid doesn’t work then we’ll have to look into surgical options.”
“I don’t want to go that route.”
Sympathy covered her face. “I know we were hoping to avoid that option, but from what it’s looking like, it’s going to eventually get to the point where the hearing aid doesn’t work anymore. The cochlear implant?—”
“No.” I shut her down, snatching my hands from Creed, slapping them down on my thighs, and leaning forward. “I don’t want the implants.”
“I know. I know. That’s the worst case scenario. First we’re going to readjust your hearing aids and get you back with your ENT. He should be able to determine exactly what’s causing the excessive damage and we’ll go from there.”
I licked my lips and balled my hands into fists. This was something I shouldn’t be upset over. I knew it was a possibility. She told me her concerns last year when I saw her. Still, it was a heavy pill to swallow.
My appointment continued and by the end of it I was exhausted, mentally and emotionally. With heavy spirits, we left the doctor’s appointment and started for Creed’s truck. It was shocking I hadn’t drawn blood from how hard I was biting my bottom lip. My eyelids pooled with unshed tears.
“Nakyra.” Creed called out to me before I could get to the passenger side of the truck. Giving him my attention, I saw his shoulders fall forward as he stepped into me, pulling me into his arms. I dug my face in his chest and the tears began to fall.
Creed didn’t speak. He rubbed my back and tightened his hold on me. Turning us, he leaned against the trunk of his truck with me in his arms.
“I don’t want to get surgery.” I sniffled. Tilting my head up, I stared at him through glossy eyes.
He didn’t respond right away, just continued to rub my back. His head dipped and he pressed his lips against my forehead.
“I don’t know what to say in a situation like this. It’s all going to be okay doesn’t seem appropriate,” he started. “I know we always spoke on the what ifs when it came to your hearing and you not being able to use your hearing aids anymore, but your doctor said there are ways you can still hear.”
I sniffed and pulled back. “Yeah, by them drilling into my skull. I just don’t get why I can’t catch a break. It’s bad enough I lost my hearing in the first place, now my ears just keep getting worse and worse.”
“The adjusted aids might work out.”
I released a guttural laugh. “Yeah, this is the third time. There’s only so much adjusting we can do before more intensive treatment has to happen.”
“Look.” Creed reached out and pulled me back into him. “Regardless of what happens, I got you. You won’t have to go through this alone. You also have Summer and Camilla too.”
“Eventually you have to go back to home,” I whispered as pain shot through my chest. A nauseating feeling passed through my stomach at the thought of him leaving.
Creed didn’t rebut my statement, he just pulled me closer and kissed the top of my head. “We’re gonna figure everything out. Still, you’re not in this alone. Whatever happens, you have people here to support you. Don’t let this stress you out.”
“You promise not to leave me?” Right now I didn’t care how clingy or needy I sounded. Creed had shown me more support in three months than Rome had in eight years.
“I promise. I got you. It’s me and you.”
I still felt uneasy, but I was choosing to believe Creed and found comfort in his words.