17. Memory
Memory
Willa
“N ow, son,” my pa says to Nash, and I begin to grow nervous about the conversations that are about to be discussed. Our hands are intertwined with slight squeezes between us to calm both of us down.
“We know the past of my parents and your grandparents, Mister Holdings. I am not one to fight feuds of others, but I will fight for my own family and this damn land. So let me tell you straight, there will be no drilling on this land, as long as I am alive. What Willa and Dirks decide after I am six feet under, is on them.” Nash nods his head in agreement. “Now that is cleared, I want to know what the two of you know, since I clearly could see the mission on my girl's face and her whispering with her mother.”
Mama and I both shyly smile. I tell her everything and sent her a quick text as we headed home last night, asking about the Holdings family and their relation to us. This leads Nash and I to tell my parents about last night and meeting Rosa. How she told us the story and what she said about Nash's grandmother, Lainey, wanting us to be together. My parents nod in understanding, and then my mama pulls out a leather bound journal and pulls a few pictures out of it.
“Willa, this journal was your grandma’s, and I want you to have it, read through it. But I also would like to admit we know Rosa also. Your dad grew up with her family and yours, Nash, until the fallout. I know Rosa and Lainey remained closer, but Rosa still kept in touch with Ellie, especially in the last several years prior to Ellie’s passing. I think Rosa always wanted to mend the relationship between them all. Not wanting to lose Rosa as a friend also, they would meet up from time to time and even had playdates with their grandkids at the parks. It seems it was not just their kids. Rosa always had the Holdings boys with her too.”
Mama slides a picture over to Nash and me. “This is the first picture I found of the two of you.”
Gasping, I pick up the picture to look at it closer. I know that it is definitely me because of my red hair, but I have on that light blue shirt that matches my eyes that I always wore. Must be about six, and I am climbing one of those rope ladders. Behind me with his hands on my hips, steadying me and as if to catch me, is a tall, cute boy with some freckles across his cheeks.
He whispers, “Ice blue.”
“What?”
“Ice blue. The color of your eyes and what you told me was the color of your shirt. I was not kidding when I told you ice blue has always been my favorite color. I just could not remember why.”
We both look at each in astonishment and back at my parents. Sliding another picture over, it is one of me sitting at a table, looking to be part of some fancy tea party.
Nash takes a deeper look. “That is my grandmother's tea set. She used to always host these fancy tea parties and make my brothers and I waiters. We hated these events.”
“Look closer,” my mama says. We do, bumping our heads together and then laughing. I let him take it first. He shakes his head and passes it over to me. Taking a look, I am stunned to see Nash in the background, staring at me. At least that is what I think he is doing, but he looks mad.
“Why do you look so pissed?”
“Willa!” my mama shrieks.
“Sorry mama, but he does.”
“I am thirteen in this picture. You are eleven I guess.” I nod, thinking that sounds about right. “Clint is the same age as you. He would not shut up about this beautiful redhead in the tea room. Swearing we knew who you were. So I walked out in the room to deliver drinks when my eyes caught yours, and I dropped the tray. As embarrassed as I was, I could not look away. You can see Clint behind me, giving me hell. I remember that day so vividly now. Later on, I found you outside, trying out Clint's skateboard that he somehow talked you into trying. You had fallen, skinning your knee and hand. I ripped him a new one, sending him to get the first aid kit. You were trying so hard not to cry, so I just sat there and held you until he came back, and I cleaned you up, placing a bandage on your knee.”
I am speechless at this moment as mama hands me another picture. It is from the back of us, but Nash has his arm around my shoulders and me leaning against him. Sure enough, we have been part of each other's past. “Thinking back, I went home and wrote in my diary about how cute you were and how you took care of me. Mama, what happened? We never saw each other again?”
“Not really, at least not where it was captured. You all had plenty of play dates together when younger. The next time I was aware you two saw each other was when Nash was a Junior and you were a Freshman. Your high schools played each in football, and if I remember correctly, Nash you were the quarterback.”
“Yes, yes I was, ma’am.”
“Willa, you were part of the halftime show with your trick riding. All the families were there, and we sat on opposite sides of the fields, but we were all aware of each other's presence. It was post game when most people had left. Willa was waiting for traffic to clear before loading her horse in the trailer. I was walking behind her with her gear, when you came to the parking lot, Nash. You two walked right past each other, but with a quick glance, you both continued walking. I watched as Nash turned back around as if to say something and watched you walk away, Willa. You just shook your head and caught up with your group and that was it. That was the last time I witnessed the two of you near each other. Can’t say there have not been other instances, but none that I have witnessed.”
“So, Rosa stated Lainey wanted us to end up together. Was Grandma Ellie part of it as well?”
“She was. She had forgiven Lainey a long time before she had passed, but she could not bring herself to be around her, let alone Jacob. I don’t think she was ever ready to welcome them back into their lives. From afar, she watched the Holdings boys grow up and knew they had the characteristics, soul, and love of Lainey. None of Jacob. Rosa pretty much was the master at work, keeping tabs on the both of you and sharing details. They are all written in this journal. I am sure your grandmother has one as well, Nash.”
“Not complaining, but why Nash? Clint and I are the same age.”
“From what Rosa has told me, Nash took to you right away. Clint was on an adventurous path, and Blake was just a toddler. You two played well together, and he was always making sure you were looked after.”
I am literally speechless of the odds, trying so hard to relive these memories laid out in front of me. My childhood was so long ago, but Nash seems to recall them quite well now that we are looking at photographs.
Pa speaks up, “There is more. This might be a hard one to swallow. Willa’s grandpa was a Major in the Army and had lots of connections. When Lainey found out you were enrolling in the army, she reached out to Henry to ensure your protection. I am not sure he ever got over the fact that I never followed in his shoes and joined the army myself, but he took great pride in you joining the ranks. Behind the scenes, you became his mission to help and protect. Priority and selective missions, before he passed he told me what he had done to protect you for so long, but you had proven yourself of great worth, and it was out of his hands on upcoming missions you were being sent on. Now, I don’t know any of the details, but I did read the newspaper when you came home, and judging by your sidekick, it was not pleasant. Henry was honored to watch you become a man and serve your country, so he wanted to make sure I knew to keep tabs on you and be there for your family in any outcome that brought you home. It seems our families have been entwined for a couple of generations now. And I will reiterate, I do not care for past feuds, but as your mama read me some of these journal entries, it was obvious there was a lot of love between your two grandmas, like kindred spirits of some sort. Even apart, they still managed to bring the two of you together it seems, with the help of Rosa. I know this is a lot to take in, but before we move onward, I have a few other things I would like to ask you, son.”
I turn to Nash who still seems to be absorbing what my pa just spewed out, along with bracing himself to what is to come. Fletcher is halfway in Nash’s lap at this point, and I am on the edge of my seat with what is about to come.
Nash nods to my pa, who proceeds. “Now, Nash, all past aside, all oil aside. Do you see my daughter as part of your future?”
“Yes, Sir. I do.”
“Are your intentions pure with her? As in no oil deals, no shared personality of your late grandfather, no use and then leave?’
“I only want Willa to be happy, and I will do whatever that takes. Also, I do not share my grandfather's idealized conceptions of family and friends with business. Neither do my brothers or parents.”
“Good. Now do you support this rodeo lifestyle she lives? Yes, she is also a teacher, but her first love has always been the rodeo. How do you plan on supporting her?”
“I absolutely support her, and from the little I have seen, she is a force. I will support her in whatever way she needs me too. Whether that is standing next to her, in the stands, sponsoring her, or being there to hold her. You have my word, Sir.”
Pa puts his hand out. “It is nice to finally meet you, son. I look forward to getting to know you more.”
“Thank you, Sir. Me too,” Nash chokes out, shaking Pa’s hand, allowing me to breathe a little easier.