Chapter 17 #2
I stroked her face. “I know which piece is next.”
She blushed. “Which one.”
Touching her ring finger, I looked into her eyes. I knew I was going to put a ring on that finger. She may have needed more convincing, but I knew Zoya was meant to be my wife.
I wanted to be her husband.
“You are not going to marry me.”
I stopped her hand from rubbing my beard and kissed her wrist. “Zoya, I’m going to marry you… you coming up off that Caselli name.”
“Prove it,” she challenged me.
“Heard you.”
Recommendation: Listen to Share My World by Dru Hill
Shorty didn’t front when she said that she would get us reservations.
Her pull was so strong that they brought us in through the kitchen.
Lully’s was a southern soul food restaurant.
It had been in Ashbourne for years, and when the owner’s daughter moved back home from college, she had taken the small takeout spot in the hoods of Ashbourne Gardens to Bourne Square.
They took us through the kitchen into the restaurant, and right toward the outdoor seating that had views of the lake. For it to be fall, the weather was still decent. It was cooler, but after the way the summer beat the shit out of us with its rays, I welcomed the cooler weather.
The wooden tables and steel chairs sat against the railing that overlooked the lake.
Lanterns were strung overhead; each string swayed with the slight breeze from the lake.
As we were shown to our seats, there were other couples talking over their meals, watching the sun drop lower toward the water. The fucking sky was a dream.
All the times I dreamed about seeing the sun set, feeling the wind on my skin, and smelling air.
I didn’t give a fuck if it was that stank ass air in Jersey, I just wanted to be able to smell something.
Anything.
I was a simple man, and once I converted, most of my prayers were asking Allah to give me the strength. Allow me to be strong in the mind, so I could make it home and experience this in person.
He came through.
The peach, plum, and that small piece of golden at the horizon was enough for me.
I could sit here and watch it until it eventually became darker, and the moon appeared.
The sound of cutlery clinking against plates, the smell of lemon from someone’s fish, with that waffling woodsmoke drifting from the small fire pit to the left of me, I took in everything.
Noticed everything.
The waiters politely moved around us like shadows, sliding plates onto the tabletops, while smiling with every word that was said. When we walked through the restaurant, it was louder. The patio was quieter, with everyone keeping their conversation to their table.
I watched Zoya’s ass in the long black dress that she wore. It fell down to her ankles, and the Gold heels she wore made a small clicking sound as she walked carefully in front of me. Her hair was straight and fell down her back perfectly.
The smell of her cherries and jasmine perfume caressed my nose each time she came near me. Her collarbone shimmered, as I politely stepped behind her and pulled her chair out. The waiter smiled and allowed me to seat my woman.
“Thank you, Goo,” she smiled, as the waiter handed her a menu, and she looked over it.
I sat down across from her and couldn’t take my eyes away from her. She was so damn beautiful, as she stared down at the menu.
“Welcome to Lully’s. Is this your first time here?” the waiter questioned.
Zoya pulled her eyes away from the menu. “This is our first time. It came highly recommended.”
“I’m glad you guys are giving us a chance. I’ll give you both a second to look over the menu. In the meantime, can I offer you something to drink?”
“I’ll take a water.”
“Amaretto sour, please.” she ordered.
“Very well. I will get those going for you. My name is Bub, so if you need anything, don’t hesitate to wave me over.”
Zoya continued to look over the menu. “They have ramen!”
I watched as she did a small dance in her seat. “Is ramen your favorite?”
“Yes. I eat ramen at least twice a week from the restaurant down the block from the building. We know each other on a first name basis at this point. I’m curious to see how this smoked turkey with braised collards ramen will taste.”
I scanned the menu and decided on the shrimp and honey butter grits. I enjoyed my grits more on the savory side, but I wasn’t picky. I could eat anything as long as the shit didn’t oink before it was put on my plate.
We both looked up at the same time and she smiled, her diamond earrings sparkling under the lights. “You’re beautiful, Boobie.”
“And you’re handsome, Goo.” She smirked. “Do I have the notorious Goon blushing?”
“Nah… just nice to hear you saying what I already knew.”
She rolled her neck. “And what did you already know?”
“That you wanted me as bad as I wanted you. I can admit you stubborn as fuck, so I was a little nervous at where this would end up.”
“Have you given up your hoes since you’ve started courting me?”
“Never been any… always been on you.”
“The girl from your mother’s block?”
“Known her for years.”
She put the menu down and stared at me, never breaking eye contact. “I’ve known plenty of people… the moment that I bounced on their dick, that meant the option to be friends was over.”
“Heard you.”
Zoya picked up her menu. “You want me to give you children… say you’re going to marry me. I feel like I should be the only one you’re worried about.”
“You want me to chase you, and I have no problem doing that. I need to know that the chase is worth it, and not to feed your ego.”
She leaned forward, and all I was paying attention to was her cleavage. “I don’t need a man to feed my ego.”
“You say that.”
“How can you think of the future when the obvious exist?”
Raising my eyebrow, I eyed her. “That is?”
“You’re Muslim and I’m not. Goo, I just ordered a drink, and you ordered water. I don’t plan on converting.”
“Did I ever ask you?”
“You said our kids will be raised Muslim.”
“And they will.”
“I’m not converting.” She was trying to make sense of what I was saying.
As I sat across from her, calm, she was expecting me to be upset with her decision. A decision she wasn’t that confident in.
The waiter sat our drinks down and took our orders before he breezed to the next table.
“I’m not trying to change you, Zoya. Only thing I’m trying to change is that last name.
I want to love you… show you what I know you deserve, even if you don’t believe the shit yourself.
My kids will be raised Muslim. I’m not here to force my religion down your throat.
Religion is a journey that you often take alone, and on the way, you have guidance from those around you.
My love doesn’t change because you won’t convert.
I only ask that you respect it, like I respect you. ”
“Like covering up?”
“Your body, your choice. Just like you keep mentioning that I’m courting you… don’t do no fuck shit to disrespect me. Disrespect is something that I can’t come back from. I gave you one strike with that shit you pulled at the race… don’t do that shit again.”
She stared into my eyes, wanting to challenge me. “And there’s three strikes?”
“There’s one and that was the last one… I’m not no fucking regular nigga. I know what I bring to the table, and you do too. Reason you so fucking scared.”
“I’m not scared.”
I reached across the table and caressed her hands. “You are and ain’t shit wrong with that. I’m here now, you don’t have to pretend with me. I’m your safe space, Baby Cakes.”
She focused her attention our hands. “Until you eventually get tired.”
“Why you assume that?”
“I’m a lot, Gerald… my mind gets to thinking and I fuck shit up. I don’t do it on purpose, or maybe I do. Mark my words, eventually, you will get tired.”
It was like she was speaking from experience. As if this happened, and she had a man tell her that he was tired and called it quits.
“I’m not going anywhere. Only time I’m going is if you tell me to… hear me?” I reached across the table and lifted her chin. “I’m not going anywhere.” I repeated for the second time.
“Okay.”
“You don’t believe me?”
She laughed. “My trust is so fucked up, Goo.”
I kissed her hands. “Baby, when it comes to me… you never have to question shit. I’m a man of my word.”
“Put that on Roxy?”
“Don’t know Roxy, but I put it on them.”
She smiled, as she settled back in her seat, staring out at the lake. “Do you believe we can have everything we want?”
“I do.”
“Are you just saying that or do you really believe it.”
“Got everything I want sitting across from me.” She looked away from me, blushing her ass off. “I got Zoya Caselli blushing?”
“I don’t blush.”
“Yeah... ight.”
Our food came out and Zoya was excited about her meal, dancing in her seat. I lowered my head. “Bismillah.”
Zoya looked over at me. “Bismillah.” she repeated before she touched her food, and I laughed.
“Ms. Not converting… why you copying me?”
“It felt wrong not to do it.”
I tasted the grits, and they were good. This spot was popular because every few minutes, someone new was being shown to their seat. I watched as she tasted her soup and leaned back in the chair.
“That good?”
“Yes… I didn’t have high hopes for this.”
We continued to eat and make small talk. She was heavily into her meal, and I was enjoying mine.
“My cousin is an addict.” I said, barely above a whisper.
It was one thing for my family to know, but another for me to admit to Zoya. To tell her something that me and my family held close to us. Inez’s addiction was known, but we were too in denial to think anyone else knew about it.
“I’m sorry. I know that isn’t something easy to deal with.”
“Nah.”
“Why did she become an addict?”
“Kind of question is that, Baby?”
She wiped her mouth. “Every addict has a reason on why they became addicted. Sounds crazy, but every action has a reaction… what was your cousin’s reason, if you know.”
I leaned back and stared at her. “Her son was murdered by some crip niggas… your boyfriend was the one that gave them the word to do it.”
“Don’t do that.”
“What?”
“Say my boyfriend like I’m not on a date with you, possibly considering giving you pussy, and speaking about a future. Just say his name… Sigel.” she checked me, and I nodded.
“You right.”
“I’m always right. So, we have beef with Sigel for more than one reason… how we handling him? He turned your cousin into a crackhead… is it crack, Goo?”
I sat across from her, as she waited for me to answer that fucked up question. “Nah.”
“Pumpkin, you cannot get all sad and emo… don’t offer the information and pull back when I genuinely want to know.”
It was in this moment I realized that my baby wasn’t all the way there. It was always the fine ass women that had more than a few screws missing.
“Heroin, pills, or whatever will get her high.”
“Dog food… damn.”
“Zoya, what the fuck?”
She reached across the table and grabbed my hands this time. “I’m sorry, Pumpkin… I cannot imagine how hard that is. To lose your baby cousin and now trying to hold onto your other cousin. I will tell you this… you need to kill him.” she whispered.
“I’m not trying to fuck up our night… talk about something else.”
“Fair. Well, I did see a spa down the street. Maybe we can come tomorrow. I’m due for a full body massage.”
I screwed my face up. “Why the fuck would you go to a spa when I can give you one.”
“Goo, you are not qualified.”
“Damn, you ain’t even gonna give me a chance?”
Zoya started to laugh. “If you fuck up, I’m never letting you touch me again.”
“You just be out here lying, huh?”
I loved watching her laugh. “I am not lying.”
“Put that on Roxy or come get up and seal this shit with a kiss.”
With her arms folded, she pushed out from the table and stomped over to my side. I grabbed her waist, and she kissed my lips, and each time she tried to go back to her seat, I kept my lips poked out.
“Sexy lying ass.” I snickered when she went back to her side of the table. “Why you ain’t put it on Rox?.”
“Roxy is resting in peace… no need to bring her up right now.”
“Yo, you be fronting, Boobie.”
She snorted. “Whatever, Gerald!”
I grabbed her free hand and kissed it. “Not mad at you either, baby… you just wild with the shit that comes out your mouth, and sharing my family shit is new.” I winked at her.
“You know… you can run. It’s not too late.”
“Never fucking running… fuck you mean.”