Chapter 24 #2
Her voice was hoarse. “Please. Not tonight… I can’t… I can’t talk about it.”
Leaning up, I kissed her lips softly. “You fucked this room up… I got a room in town, and I want you to soak in the bath, eat, and when you’re ready, we gonna talk.”
“Okay.”
“And you gonna go on your trip. Capri and Blair ready to fly out here because they worried.”
“No… I don’t want to do anything for my birthday.”
Aside from a few things she had bought when she got here, she didn’t have much to pack. She handled that, and we left the room. It was a reminder for me to never get her ass mad because I felt bad for whoever had to put this room back together.
When we came back downstairs, Kora had left back to her hotel. The downstairs lights were off.
“We’re over here,” I heard Stevie’s voice, but didn’t see her.
She turned the small lamp next to her on, and she was on the couch while Menace was asleep on her.
“He’s good?” I questioned, holding Zoya’s hand.
Stevie nodded. “He spirals. I know when things hit him harder because he’ll rub his hands raw, and start to repeat himself… you know, it’s not easy being him.” Her eyes looked at Zoya. “Zoy, you alright?”
Zoya stared at her brother, who had his hands tightly around his wife, as he rested his head on her shoulder. Stevie kissed his head, as she pulled the cover over the both of them.
“Yeah.” Her voice was hoarse.
Stevie looked from her husband to Zoya. “I love you both… I’m here for you too. Today couldn’t have been easy. Do you guys want to stay in the guest suite down here?”
I could tell whatever happened had the entire family drained. “Nah, I got a hotel in town.”
“Take me with you… this chalet gets creepy at night,” she whispered, holding both Menace’s ears so he wouldn’t hear.
I laughed. “Tell Mens to call me if he needs me.”
“Ignore the scary cat… drive safe. Zoya, we’re not cancelling your birthday trip…
no ma’am. I haven’t squeezed this mom bod into my swimsuit, let my husband smell me a million times for you to change your mind.
You deserve to be celebrated… I think we all deserve something to take our mind off everything.
We can push it again, but we will go on this trip. ”
“K,” was all Zoya said as she offered her sister-in-law a small smile.
I held her hand, as the driver waited outside for us. While she climbed in, I tossed our bags into the back and then got in behind her. She moved closer to me, laying her head in the crook of my neck.
She was drained. Seconds later, she was softly snoring as the driver took us into town. Zoya didn’t need to think or question how I was coming. All she needed to know is that her man was coming.
“Zoya, come the fuck here now.”
She stood there with her arms folded, wanting to ignore what I was telling her. I stood there, staring at her, my eyes low because I smoked. With the way life had been, I deserved a fucking spliff.
Between this shit with Zoya and then my aunt calling me because Inez didn’t come home, a nigga was about to rip my hair from my scalp. I had finally talked my aunt down and told her I would call Khaos to look for her since I was out of town.
Just as I was finally about to lay down and sleep next to my baby, I felt the bed move. At first, I ignored the shit because she probably went to the bathroom. When I heard bags and shit, I knew we were about to repeat fucking Ashbourne.
Between being high, and tired, I wasn’t in the mood to be playing fucking games like I didn’t travel across the country to get to her.
“I just booked a flight home; I promise to call you when I’m home. I’m good, I promise.” She sniffled, her eyes still swollen.
I remained.
We were standing outside the hotel at five in the morning, and she was telling me that she was good. It was the wild shit that came out her mouth that had me questioning if I was crazy.
She fixed my shirt, and the sweatpants she wore, and fucked with her phone. “Baby Cakes, if I come over there, I’m picking you up, carrying you back upstairs and fucking the shit out of you. Is that want you want… you want some dick, Boobie?”
Zoya folded her arms, determined to be defiant.
It was natural to her, all these years, she only had to answer to herself and Menace.
She ignored his ass and did whatever she wanted anyway.
Zoya already knew, being with me meant that I was done playing games.
This cat and mouse shit that she wanted, I wasn’t in the mood for.
We had plenty of conversations, fucked that shit into her, and I came when she needed me. Had I not fucking proven that I was in this shit and ready for whatever?
“I’m not going back into that hotel and you’re not picking me up.” The bell man looked at us, in our standoff.
Both wanting our way, but only one of us would get it.I lifted my sweats, licked my lips while walking towards her. “Nah tek nuh talk.”
Tears fell down her face, as her body remained tensed. She tried to walk away slowly, and I softly grabbed her. “Gerald, I’m not listening to your Jamaican talk. Just let me go, please,” she whined to me.
Soon as I got close enough to her, I kissed her ear. “Running not gonna solve nothing… come talk to me. Tell me what’s going on.”
Before her ass could protest, I picked her up and walked back into the hotel. The doorman held the door open, and I carried her back up to our hotel room. She had my ass out here early in the morning negotiating with her.
“You gonna stop fucking playing me like I’m pussy, Zoya.” I slapped her ass, as I exited the elevator.
“I’m sad, Goo,” she whined while tossed over my shoulder. “Just let me be sad alone… I miss my dog and want to be sad in my own space.”
I let us into the hotel room and sat her ass on the couch. “Be sad with your man… why the fuck you trying to isolate, Zoya?”
“’Cause that’s what the fuck I do best. I take everything in and sit with it… every fucking body lied to me. Looked me in my face and lied to me.” She sobbed.
I kneeled down in front of her, and she refused to look at me. “Tell me what happened?”
Since she had gotten into that bed, she hadn’t settled. Her eyes may have been closed, but she was far from rested. I sat on the balcony as I smoked my spliff and watched as she tossed and turned. I was on her time, so I wasn’t going to rush her to talk.
Turning her head to face me, tears poured down her face. “I have a grandmother here that I never knew about. My mom’s mom.”
“That’s not bad, baby… means you got some family.”
She shook her head. “No, Goo, she’s not my grandmother… she is my mom.”
Her shoulders fell forward as she broke down and told me everything that happened. The shit had me so fucked up, I ended up sitting down on my ass. It was hard for her to talk because she continued to choke over her words.
Still in disbelief.
Not able to process how some shit like this happened to her. I understood how she felt, because her entire life had been a lie. For good reason, it had been held back from her, but two things could be true at the same time.
“Shit.” I pulled her from the couch and pulled her between my legs.
Wrapping my arms around her, we rocked on the floor as she sobbed. “They’ve always been my brothers and sisters.”
“They are your brothers and sister. Nothing changes, and I don’t care what you found out. Kora and Menace protected you because they thought that was best for you. I can’t front… seeing how this shit has you, I think I would have too.”
She turned around. “You would keep something from me?”
“I can’t speak on the future, but if I knew it would hurt you like this… I would, baby. My job is to protect you, so if that means omitting things, that’s what I’m gonna do.”
“I’m your lawyer.”
I laughed, as I kissed her neck. “This is what you’re worried about?”
“Yes. You are supposed to tell me everything.”
“What happens when you become my wife?”
She turned in my arms and held my face. “I half expected you to run… my mother has the mental capacity of a four-year-old, and I’m a product of rape… honestly, I’m not shit. You should just go on with that girl that was trying to suck your dick on your mom’s block.”
“Zoya, what the fuck? She wasn’t even trying to suck my dick.”
“I know… I hear you, you want her.”
Between Zoya and her brother, I was about to lose my mind. “I want you to suck my dick… only you. Wanna know what else?”
“What?” She messed with my beard with her eyes closed.
“I wanna suck on yo pussy like a mango seed… for the rest of my life. I’m not thinking of anybody else, just you Boobie.”
“Even after finding out that I’m an auntie… think Menace will call me Auntie?”
Kissing her face, she squealed but held me around the neck. “I love you, Zoya. This shit is heavy, and I know it will be with you, but therapy, Boobie. You got to talk to somebody… you cannot hold this close to your chest and isolate. Shit not healthy.”
“Says the man that was in prison. Isn’t that what you do in there?”
I licked my lips. “The reason so many of us end up going back. I’m not perfect. I find peace in Allah… that’s not everyone’s story though.”
I could tell that she had to be mentally there, and she wasn’t. As much as you may have wanted therapy for someone, they had to take it in their hands and go. She yawned, and I kissed her lips.
“Since you got me up, go lay down before I head down to the gym.” I stood up, pulling her to her feet.
“You could have let me catch my flight.” She held my hand as I walked her crazy ass back to the bed.
“Stop running, Zoya… start communicating. You have fucking degrees. I witnessed you eat prosecutors up in court. You have the tools to communicate, use that shit and I’m not gonna address this shit again, eh?”
“Okay.”
I held onto her chin. “I want to hear the words… say Daddy, I won’t do it again.”
She laughed. “Daddy, I won’t do it again. I will communicate… I get crazy sometimes.” She admitted something that I already knew.