Chapter 12 #2
Chris screwed up his face. “Okay, first of all, this is one of those things that I just can’t get on board with. This whole…laid-back Ava who says cool and plays video games and–”
“Yeah, I know, wears my hair in the way you hate it.”
“I don’t hate it, Ava, I just don’t think it’s your best look. I just…want you to look your best.”
Ava shifted her weight, wanting to argue back, but choosing not to.
“And second,” Chris continued, “I didn’t do anything to Alex, and I’d really like to know what he accused me of.”
“He didn’t accuse you of anything,” she answered. “I could tell something happened by the way he was acting. I had to drag it out of him.”
Chris rolled his eyes. “Oh, I bet. You probably really had to convince him to tell you what big, bad Chris did to him.”
“That’s not how it was at all. But the thing is you did do something to him. This little game you’re playing with telling him that you know the real me and he doesn’t was just mean.”
“Well, Ava, I’m sorry it hurt his precious little feelings, but it’s true. Or at least I hope it is. He’s still living like you’re in college. Come on, Ava, you have to agree here, don’t you?”
Ava’s features pinched. “There’s nothing wrong with how he lives.”
“No, I guess with his money, there isn’t.”
“That’s not what I meant,” Ava answered.
“Fine, then it’s not what you meant. But I didn’t do anything wrong. I told him the truth. The Ava he knew…she doesn’t exist. She grew up. She moved on.”
Ava stared at the area rug beneath her feet. Had she? Was she still the same person at the core?
“He still knows me. Just because he doesn’t know my favorite book in the last year doesn’t mean–”
“It does,” Chris insisted. “Your tastes have changed. “
She heaved a sigh. “Not really. When I was in college, I made Alex watch those ridiculous Hallmark Christmas movies every year. And every year, he sat there through every single one of them.”
“Yes, Ava, and now…you can’t stand that sappy stuff. Because you grew up and you learned romance isn’t this nonsense of being swept off your feet. It’s the person who you just get through your day with.”
Her features pinched. “No. No, my tastes haven’t changed. I still watch those movies. I just…don’t do it with you because you hate them. But I still like them. And my favorite book…it wasn’t Echoes in the Dark, it was The Billionaire’s Royal Secret.”
“You’re joking.”
“I’m not. So, if you want to play who knows the real Ava, Chris, I’m not sure you’re going to win.”
He huffed out a breath as confusion etched his face. “Well, I guess…wow, now I have to be the one to ask why you accepted that ring.”
Ava chewed her lower lip. That question had rung in her mind so many times since she’d been in the Hamptons. Was it simply her overthinking or was there something more? Something that had been triggered when she’d seen Alex again.
“You know, I think we need to take some time apart, Ava. I really do. Because I’m not sure we’re on the same page anymore.”
Tears burned her eyes as she let her gaze fall to the floor again with a slight nod. “Okay.”
“What? That’s it?”
“What do you want me to say, Chris? Things are not going that well right now. We’re fighting constantly. You and Alex are fighting constantly.”
“Oh, so that’s really what this is about. Poor Alex is hurt.”
“That’s not true, but this is exactly what I mean. Everything goes back to Alex. You can’t separate it. You blame everything on him.”
“Well, we didn’t start fighting like this until you came out here.”
Was most of Chris’s problem borne out of jealousy of Alex? “No, but I’m not sure he’s the reason we are fighting. And you said you needed the break.”
“Right,” he said. “I did, yes. I just…think we need to cool off.”
He crossed closer to her, sliding an arm around her waist and kissing her forehead. “But I still love you, Ava. Okay?”
She nodded. “Yep.”
He cupped her face in his hands. “Hey, I mean it. I just…I need to be out of this house.”
She bobbed her head. “Will you let me know when you get settled somewhere?”
“Yeah,” he answered. “I’m just going to head to a hotel in town. I suppose I can’t convince you to come with me? Get your own room away from this place?”
She shook her head. “No. I’m not leaving Alex. I’ve told you that.”
“And that’s something I need to come to terms with.” He kissed her forehead again. “I’ll text you, okay?”
“Yeah,” she answered.
“Hey,” he said, pinching her chin between his thumb and forefinger, “we’ll get through this, okay? I just need some time.”
She brushed his lips with hers. “Drive safe.”
They said their goodbyes before he strode from the room, grabbing his bag and disappearing through the front door.
Ava wrapped her arms around her midriff, allowing the floodgates to open. Tears poured down her cheeks as the emotions she’d held in check during the argument spilled over.
She shuffled back to the couch and collapsed on it, wincing as her ribs ached as she heaved heavy breaths, her sobbing continuing. She buried her face in her hands.
Had she been hiding a piece of herself away from Chris? She’d thought she’d just given up most of her childish behaviors, but she still curled up under a blanket and cried watching those stupid, sappy holiday movies because she enjoyed it.
She told herself she didn’t need to share everything with her spouse, but did she share anything?
What were the reasons she’d fallen in love with Chris? She tried to remember why she’d said yes to his proposal. But nothing came to mind.
She didn’t know what to do now. Could they work through their problems, or should she give up?
Warm hands rubbed her forearms before pulling her hands from her cheeks.
Her glassy, blurred vision found Alex perched on the coffee table in front of her. “Don’t cry, Avs.”
She stared at his face, recalling the support she’d felt less than an hour ago in his arms. Her heart ached as she pondered her strained relationship with Chris.
Alex’s concerned expression sent warmth rushing through her.
The contrast between how she felt now versus her interactions with Chris was stark.
She felt drawn to Alex, pulled by a force she wasn’t certain she could ignore.
Her eyes focused on his lips.
They’d kissed earlier to convince Miranda of their relationship. Nothing had felt wrong about it. In fact, it felt natural, normal, right.
She leaned closer, the space between them charged with unspoken realizations, until their lips met softly. The gentle kiss, one that spoke of tender familiarity and a deep yearning, swept through her, burning away the sadness she felt only moments earlier.
She cupped his face, leaning further into the kiss until her eyes flew open, the reality of their situation dousing her like cold water. She pulled back abruptly, a hand flying to cover her mouth, her eyes wide with a mixture of fear and regret as her heart raced.
“I–I’m sorry, Alex. I shouldn’t have–” Her voice, thick with emotion, faltered as fresh tears glistened. “I can’t do this.”
Her words hung heavy in the air, the room still around them otherwise, as the weight of her statement crushed her. She rose, twisting away from him as she dared not face him and his reaction. Her quick steps carried her from the room, her features pained with remorse.
She raced to her room, the door clicking closed behind her, sealing her alone with her racing thoughts. Why had she just kissed Alex? And would it destroy their relationship?