Chapter Twenty-Seven
Jamie
It didn’t take long to heat some soup and pour it into a couple of thermoses, wrap some of Oliver’s delicious smelling tear-and-share bread in some foil, put my boots and overalls back on again, and load up the quad bike with everything we might need.
Nell and Moss perched on the back as I slid on behind Will, clutching him tightly.
If I was going to stay, we were going to have to talk about getting another bike.
Maybe I could actually use my sizeable trust fund to be productive for once and get a few things the farm desperately needed.
If Will protested, I’d gently argue my point, and if that failed, I’d resort to bribery in the form of blow jobs.
It wouldn’t be the most ethical way to get what I wanted, but I wasn’t above it.
Especially if it would get us some extra equipment and stop Will muttering about repairs.
The sun was starting to sink beyond the horizon as we approached the gate, and I saw Higgs leaning against it.
I’d grown very fond of the quiet, insightful man over the past few months and enjoyed his company.
He was a good teacher and hadn’t seemed to think anything of showing a city boy with no experience how to mend fences, change the bike’s oil, feed lambs, get stones out of sheep’s feet, and everything in between.
He’d squeezed my shoulder when I’d cried over our first death and hadn’t given me some spiel about sucking it up like I’d expected. He’d just told me it never got easier.
Higgs had even introduced me to the knackerman when he’d come to collect the bodies in his truck.
He was a tiny old man named Frank with kind eyes and a kinder smile, who’d patted my hand and asked me about myself.
In return, Frank had answered my questions, and I’d walked away from the whole encounter with a strange feeling of peace and community.
Out here, everyone shared in the joy and tragedy of the season. It was something I’d never experienced before.
“How’s she doing?” Will asked as he stopped the ATV just short of the gate and climbed down. I followed him.
“Well,” Higgs said, pointing at a spot in the corner of the field, not far from the gate, where the ewe had hunkered down away from prying eyes and the nippy wind that had blown up as the sun set. “Things are finally on the move.”
“She’s taken her time about it,” Will said, leaning on the gate next to him.
“She did last year and all. Nowt in the world that’ll rush her.”
“Did Forest think there’s more than one in there?” I asked, referring to the vet who’d come out at the start of the week.
“He thinks there’s just one,” Will said. “But it’s always hard to tell without a scan.”
I nodded and slipped my hand into Will’s. “However many there are, let’s just hope for a safe arrival.”
Will smiled at me and squeezed my fingers before turning back to the ewe.
She kept pawing the ground, digging up the soft earth, then walking away and coming back.
She looked up, noticing us for the first time, and I wondered if she’d want to move away.
But she didn’t seem upset by our presence, and a moment later, she was back to digging again.
This continued for a while, and like the rest of her pregnancy, the ewe seemed in no hurry to get things over with.
“If you want to go home, you can,” Will said to Higgs. “We can manage.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah. Go and get some sleep. I’ll give you a call if we get into serious trouble.”
Higgs looked at the ewe for a moment, then across the rest of the field at the flock all huddled together, the lambs all tucked in alongside their mothers in the growing dark. “All right. I’ll have my phone on.” He nodded at Will. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“See you tomorrow.”
Higgs turned and walked back down the track. This flock was the closest to the farm, so it wouldn’t take him long to get back. The only reason Will and I had used the ATV was because of the amount of stuff we’d needed to bring, although most of it would only be needed in an emergency.
Soon, Will and I were alone, leaning on the gate together while the dogs snoozed on the back of the bike.
I knew now probably wasn’t the best moment to bring up everything I’d talked about with Oliver, but I couldn’t get it out of my mind.
And if we were going to be here for a while, we might as well fill the time.
The only problem was I had no idea where to start.
“So,” Will said eventually and my heart skipped. “Oliver liked the lambs, then?”
“Yeah,” I said, smiling to myself. We’d had this conversation at least twice now, and I wondered if he was trying to use it as a segue into something else. “He was good with them too. And we had a good chat while we were out there. He’s really nice.”
“He is. I didn’t know him before, but I got to know him last year, and I like him. He’s very down to earth in some ways and creative in others. I think he and Lane balance each other out.”
“I got that feeling.” I looked up at the blanket of stars beginning to twinkle above us, wondering if I should just go for it.
The ewe was lying down now, seemingly very unbothered by everything, so maybe this was my window.
“Oliver told me a bit about moving here. About how he worked things out with Lane.”
Will hummed but didn’t say anything, and I didn’t dare look at him in case I lost my nerve.
“It made me realise something,” I added. “Something I’ve sort of known for a while, but now I’m completely certain.”
“What’s that?”
“I don’t want to go back to London. Ever.
” I gripped the top bar of the gate in my gloved hands and ploughed on, determined to get everything out before Will cut me off.
“These past few months have been incredible. I’ve learnt so much about, well, everything, and it’s made me realise what I really want in life.
And I’m not going to find it in a London nightclub. ”
“What… what do you want?” Will asked softly. I finally turned my head and saw him gazing back at me, hope and longing shining in his eyes.
“You. This. All of it. I know it’s a world away from everything I had before, and I know you’re worried I’ll get bored and want to leave.
But I’m not. I know that. And I’m not going to get bored of you either, Will.
I lo—” There was a plaintive bleat from behind me as I spoke, and I whirled around to see our ewe on her feet, visibly distressed and straining despite the dimming light.
“What’s wrong?” I asked. Will was already opening the gate and darting through, ordering the dogs to stay put.
“I don’t know. The lamb might be stuck.” He pulled a head torch out of his pocket, slipping the band around his beanie and flicking it on. I did the same as I followed him. At first, I’d thought the head torches were ridiculous, but they definitely had their uses.
“It’s all right,” Will said softly as we approached. “Steady, girl, steady. That’s it. We’re not going to hurt you.”
The ewe bleated again, and I saw her body shake as she strained, her body following its instincts and starting to push. Will made quiet hushing sounds as we got closer, and I kept behind him until he could get a hand on her, carefully swinging his leg over her to hold her carefully in place.
I walked around to the back, trying to think through all the various articles and PDFs I’d read through about abnormal deliveries and lamb presentation.
The golden rule was making sure that intervention was actually needed, and there was a chance we’d jumped the gun a little, but I knew Will was on edge because it was the last one.
Also, seeing her suddenly so upset after being so calm wasn’t the best sign.
One quick look told us the first waterbag had burst, and I saw two small hooves and the smooth curve of the lamb’s nose, covered by the membrane of the second waterbag, which hadn’t quite burst. It was immediately obvious what the problem might be as the ewe strained again, trying to push the lamb free.
The lamb was enormous.
“Shit,” I said. “That’s a chunky baby you’ve got there, mama.”
“No wonder,” Will said. “You’ve been cooking him for a while.”
The ewe bleated again as she panted and pushed, but the lamb barely moved. She was going to need some help to ease it free.
“Okay,” I said, looking up at Will. “I’m going to get some gloves and some disinfectant. I’ll be right back.”
Will nodded and gently soothed the ewe as I hurried back to the ATV.
Nell and Moss were waiting but were happy to stay put as I grabbed some new plastic gloves that would cover my arms, some lubrication, and some diluted disinfectant in a bottle.
The one thing we needed to avoid was the ewe getting an infection, so I needed to be as clean as I could be in the middle of a muddy field.
I’d barely been away for two minutes by the time I returned, but the lamb still hadn’t moved. I quickly ripped open the pack of gloves and rolled them on, looking up at Will. I’d only had to do this once before, when the triplets were born, and that had been completely different.
With another shuddering contraction, the lamb was expelled a tiny bit farther forward and the waterbag surrounding it burst. We had to make sure the membrane didn’t get stuck over its nose, or it would suffocate before it was even born. But a quick glance showed no immediate danger.
“Okay,” Will said. “Grasp its forelegs gently, and when she pushes, you pull. You might need to add some lubrication.” His eyes met mine and he gave me a little smile. “You’ve got this.”
His words made a layer of calm settle over me, and I let out a long breath as I added lube around the lamb to ease its passage, then gently wrapped my hands around it’s front legs. “All right, mum,” I said. “Time to push.”
I watched as the ewe began to strain again, and as she pushed, I began to pull back, slowly and carefully easing the lamb’s shoulders through the ewe’s pelvis.
“That’s it, good girl,” Will said. “Couple more times and you’ll have a baby.”
“A beautiful, big baby,” I said as the ewe started to push again.
The lamb began to slide free, and suddenly, there was a sticky, messy, and heavy baby sheep dropping into my lap and covering my overalls with all the fluids that accompanied birth.
“Shit. There we go!” I carefully lowered the lamb to the floor as Will released the ewe. Her instincts kicked in and she turned, immediately starting to clean her baby who started squeaking and bleating, the bond between them forming before our eyes.
I looked across at Will who was grinning, his eyes taking in the state of me. “You know, you were going to say something before that happened,” he said.
“I was,” I said, walking over to him and leaning in to press a kiss to his cold lips, trying to avoid letting my body brush against his. “Maybe I should clean up before we have this conversation, though?”
“Maybe. Or I can just say it. I love you, Jamie Stone, and I don’t ever want you to leave. I want you to stay here, with me, for as long as you’ll have me.”
I smiled, my heart feeling so big I thought it might burst. “I love you too. And I don’t ever plan on leaving. You’re stuck with me now.”
“Good,” Will chuckled. “Then I can tell you, you really need a bath. Especially because you have birthing fluids on your face.”
“What? Fuck! Ew, how?” I looked at the ewe and her safely delivered baby, who was just starting to stand. “It’s a good thing I love all of you. Because that is absolutely fucking disgusting.”
Will grinned and drew me in for a carefully placed kiss. “Good thing indeed.”