Chapter 2 Two Simps
My name is Su Lan. My brother’s name is Su Qi.
We’re three years apart—biological siblings. We have a lot in common. For example, we’re both simps.
He’s recently been obsessed with the aloof business magnate Gu Shang.
And the one I like is the young master of the Chi family, Chi Wen.
Yes, our second common point is—we both like guys.
Yes, my brother is gay.
When he came out, our parents swallowed three quick-acting heart pills in a row.
Luckily they’re open-minded enough, and since my brother has never been easy to raise, their tolerance threshold kept rising. In the end they accepted it, even if reluctantly.
My mom even asked me worriedly, “Su Lan, you’re not… also…?”
I comforted her. “No, I’m the same as my brother.”
My mom reached for the heart pills again. “You—you—you’re gay too?!”
“…” I hurried to rephrase. “I mean, I like guys too.”
Only then did my mom put the pills back.
Our third common point is that we’re both complete failures at pursuing people.
I’m introverted and slow to warm up, so I chase people in a slow, clueless way.
My brother is the complete opposite.
He’s like a social butterfly, a playboy with charming peach-blossom eyes.
Ever since he met Gu Shang, he’s been pursuing him openly, trying every trick to flirt, but the other party stays ice-cold.
In terms of chasing people, although our methods are polar opposites, the result is the same.
But now it seems I’m failing even harder than my brother.
Su Qi sat down next to me. “Hey, don’t be sad! There are plenty of fish in the sea! I’ll find you some hot guys right now!”
“No.” I refused. “The hot guys you find are all gay.”
“…” Su Qi was speechless for a few seconds. “There are straight ones too, okay!”
I still said, “No.”
“Why are you so stubborn?” Su Qi started criticizing Chi Wen. “Chi Wen isn’t that great anyway! Looks polite on the surface, but he’s actually super cunning! White-cut-black, you know!”
I didn’t like him badmouthing Chi Wen. “Oh, and Gu Shang with his iceberg face all day is any better? Black-cut-black.”
Su Qi gave me a knock on the head. “Hey! You little brat! I’m comforting you, OK?”
I ignored him.
“I told you your way of chasing people doesn’t work.
” He started mocking me again. “So dumb. You made a sandwich by hand but said you bought it outside. No matter how far his banquets were, you went, but you didn’t dare greet him.
You hid in the corner until almost the end, when he saw you and came over—only then did you say ‘what a coincidence, you’re here too. ’”
I: “…”
Su Qi went on. “I told you—when you chase someone, you have to be bold! Like me—shoot your shot straight!”
I muttered back, “But you didn’t get him either.”
“…” Su Qi was speechless again. “At least Gu Shang isn’t getting engaged!”
I got hit hard again and silently opened my phone.
Suddenly a message from my friend popped up.
Song Zhi: 【Su Lan! Big news! The tycoon your brother’s been chasing—he’s getting engaged too!】
Song Zhi: 【What’s going on lately! Is there a buy-one-get-one-free engagement sale? Why is everyone getting engaged?】
Song Zhi: 【Aren’t you getting mocked by your brother right now? Hurry up and mock him back!】
I: “…”
Song Zhi really is my best friend—she even guessed I was being teased by my brother.
I stopped drinking, turned to look at Su Qi.
Su Qi got goosebumps from my stare. “What? What’s with that look? Wait—why do I feel like you’re pitying me? Isn’t it the other way around? My crush isn’t getting engaged…”
I didn’t speak, just kept looking at him quietly.
He looked back, confused.
I kept looking.
His expression slowly collapsed. “No way…”
I nodded. “Yes.”
Su Qi grabbed his phone and typed furiously.
Five minutes later, he put the phone down with a blank look and turned to me. “Got any more beer?”
I quickly opened a bottle for him. Just as I was about to say something, Su Qi cut me off. “You don’t need to comfort me…”
“Oh, I wasn’t going to.” I said, “I was going to say—thanks. I actually feel a lot better now.”
“…” Su Qi flipped me off. “Screw you.”
I pouted. “My grandpa is your grandpa too.”
Su Qi finally shut up.
Watching him silently drink half the bottle, I still felt bad and tried to comfort him. “Su Qi, are you okay…”
“Su Lan.” Su Qi suddenly called my name.
I: “Huh?”
Right now, Su Qi basically had the words “I have a terrible idea” written all over his face.
His eyes lit up. “Little ghost, let’s run away!”
I: “?”