Chapter 22
Jesse
It had been three days since our New Year’s Eve kiss, and I was running out of excuses and places to hide from Cole.
The guilt was eating me alive. Ever since the party, I’d been avoiding him like the plague.
I’d make excuses about needing to handle online orders or make early deliveries.
I’d leave before dawn and come back after dark.
When we did cross paths, I’d mumble something about being tired and escape to my room.
I couldn’t face him. Not after what I’d seen in Evelyn’s eyes.
This morning I’d hidden in the barn, pretending to manage inventory while actually just staring blankly at spreadsheets. My phone buzzed with another text from Cole.
I ignored it, just like I’d ignored the previous five. What would I even say? “Hey, by the way, Evelyn saw us making out and now your life is probably going to implode”? He’d fucking melt down right in front of me.
The barn door creaked open, and I ducked lower in my chair, praying it was just one of the ranch hands. No such luck.
“You comin’ in for supper or what?” Cole asked, his voice echoing through the empty barn. He let out a long sigh. “I know you’re in here, Jesse. I can see the top of your head behind the desk.”
I straightened up and swiveled in my chair to face him, my heart hammering against my ribs. He looked exhausted, dark circles under his eyes, his usual confident posture replaced with something more uncertain.
“Sorry,” I lied. “I’ve been busy.”
“Uh-huh.”
He closed the distance between us, leaning against the desk. His face was inches from mine, and I felt my heart skip a beat. But when he reached for me, I pulled away from him.
“What the hell is goin’ on, Jesse?” he growled, clearly annoyed. “One minute you’re telling me you’re falling for me, the next you’re acting like I don’t exist.”
I couldn’t meet his eyes. “Like I said, things are busy.”
“Well, be less busy,” he grumbled, pulling away from me.
I could still see the confusion in his expression.
I was usually the one pushing him into uncomfortable situations, not the other way around.
“Evelyn said she won’t let you skip supper again and I’m hungry.
” He grabbed my chair, pulling me away from the desk. “Let’s go.”
I froze, my stomach plummeting. The thought of sitting across from Evelyn at dinner made my skin crawl with anxiety. How would I face her knowing what she knew? Would she say something? Drop hints? Give me that same knowing look that had haunted me since New Year’s?
“I’m really not hungry,” I said weakly.
“Too bad.” Cole’s hand settled on my shoulder, warm and heavy.
“You’ve been avoiding me for days, and I’m sick of it.
We’re going to eat dinner like normal people, and then, when Evelyn goes home, you’re going to tell me what the hell is going on.
” He paused, crossing his arms over his chest. “Then I want to fuck you.”
My cock twitched despite my panic. There was no escape.
I reluctantly stood, my legs feeling like lead as I followed him out of the barn.
The cold January air was sharp and unpleasant, but it did nothing to cool the panic rising in my chest. We walked in silence toward the house, my mind racing through possible excuses, explanations, anything to avoid the truth.
The warm glow from the kitchen windows seemed threatening rather than welcoming. Through the glass, I could see Evelyn moving around, setting the table. My steps slowed involuntarily.
“Come on,” Cole urged, his hand pressing against the small of my back. “It’s freezing out here.”
The moment we stepped inside, the smell of pot roast enveloped us. On any other day, it would have made my mouth water. Today, it made me nauseous.
“There you boys are!” Evelyn called, her voice cheerful as always. “Was beginning to think I’d have to eat all this by my lonesome.”
I couldn’t look at her. Couldn’t bear to see that knowing expression again. I busied myself washing my hands at the sink, taking longer than necessary.
“Jesse was hiding in the barn again,” Cole said, hanging up his coat. “Had to drag him out.”
“Well, I’m glad you did,” Evelyn replied. I felt her eyes on my back. “A young man needs to eat, especially with all the work you two have been doing.”
I dried my hands slowly, finally turning to face the table. Cole had already taken his usual seat. Evelyn was placing a basket of rolls in the center. There was nowhere to run.
I sat down, keeping my eyes on my plate as Evelyn served the pot roast. The silence stretched uncomfortably until Cole cleared his throat.
“This looks great, Evelyn,” he said. “Thank you.”
“My pleasure,” she replied, settling into her chair. “It’s nice to have both of you home for dinner for a change.”
I felt her gaze on me again and risked a glance up. Our eyes met briefly before I looked away, but it was enough to confirm my fears. She knew. And she was waiting for one of us to say something.
“So,” she continued casually, “I ran into Caroline Whitaker at the grocery store today. She was just raving about what a wonderful time everyone had at their New Year’s party.”
Oh god. No. Not here. Not like this.
I fought to keep my face neutral, stabbing at a piece of pot roast with my fork. My hand was shaking so badly I had to grip the utensil tighter to hide it.
“That’s nice,” I mumbled, shoving food into my mouth so I wouldn’t have to speak further.
“She mentioned seeing you both there,” Evelyn continued, cutting her meat with deliberate precision. “Said Jesse was quite the hit with some of the ladies. Caroline’s niece couldn’t stop asking about you.”
Cole’s head snapped up at that, his eyes narrowing slightly. “Is that right?”
“Too bad she’s barking up the wrong tree, huh?” Evelyn added with a grin.
I nearly choked on my food. Was this Evelyn’s game? To pretend nothing had happened while dropping these little bombs?
“I didn’t notice,” I managed after swallowing. “I spent most of the night outside. Too crowded in there.”
“Mmm,” Evelyn hummed, taking a sip of her water. “The view from that back deck is something special, isn’t it? Especially at midnight on New Year’s Eve.”
The fork slipped from my fingers, clattering against the plate. Cole looked at me sharply, confusion written across his features. I couldn’t breathe. Couldn’t think. She was toying with us, drawing it out like a cat with a wounded mouse.
“I... I need some water,” I stammered, rising abruptly from my chair. My knee banged against the table, making the dishes rattle.
In the kitchen, I gripped the edge of the sink, trying to steady my breathing. This was exactly what I’d been afraid of. Evelyn knew, and now she was going to tell Cole, and then everything would fall apart. He’d blame me. He’d hate me. He’d—
“You okay there, Jesse?”
I spun around to find Evelyn standing in the kitchen doorway, concern etched on her face. Or was it judgment? I couldn’t tell anymore.
“I’m fine,” I lied, filling a glass with shaking hands. “Just... tired.”
She stepped closer, lowering her voice. “You’ve been avoiding the house. Avoiding Cole. Is it because of what I saw at the party?”
There it was. Out in the open. I closed my eyes briefly, wishing I could disappear. “Evelyn, I—”
“I’m not judging you, honey,” she said softly, surprising me. “Lord knows it’s not my place.”
I stared at her, searching for any sign of disgust or disapproval, but found only gentle concern. “You’re not?”
“No,” she shook her head. “But I am worried about you both. About what this means.”
“It doesn’t mean anything,” I said quickly, desperately. “It was just... it was New Year’s Eve. People do stupid things.”
Evelyn’s expression hardened slightly. “Don’t you lie to me, Jesse Harris. I’ve known you since you were ten years old. And I’ve watched the way you two look at each other. That wasn’t just some midnight kiss between drunk friends.”
My throat tightened as I searched for words, any words to deflect or deny. But the fight had gone out of me. Evelyn had always seen through my bullshit, even when I was a teenager.
“Does... does Cole know that you saw us?” I finally asked, my voice barely above a whisper.
She shook her head. “No. And I won’t tell him if you don’t want me to.”
Relief flooded through me, quickly followed by confusion. “Why? Why wouldn’t you tell him?”
Evelyn sighed, glancing back toward the dining room where Cole waited. “Because it’s not my story to tell. It’s yours. Both of yours.”
I leaned against the counter, suddenly exhausted. “He’ll fall apart if people find out, Evelyn. You know how much this ranch means to him. How much the respect of people in this town means.”
“I know,” she said softly. “But hiding and lying isn’t the answer, Jesse. It never is.”
“Then what is?” I asked, desperation creeping into my voice. “What am I supposed to do?”
She reached out, squeezing my arm gently. “Talk to him. Be honest. Figure it out together.”
“And if we can’t? If he chooses the ranch over—” I cut myself off, unable to finish the thought.
“Then at least you’ll know,” she said simply. “Better than hiding in barns for the rest of your life, isn’t it?”
Before I could respond, Cole’s voice called from the dining room. “Everything okay in there?”
“Just fine,” Evelyn called back, giving me a meaningful look. “Jesse’s helping me with dessert.”
She pulled a pie from the refrigerator and handed it to me, along with three plates. “Whatever you decide, you know I love you both.” She paused, her eyes serious. “And for what it’s worth, I think Jack would’ve… come around eventually. He loved you boys more than anything else in this world.”
I blinked back sudden tears. “I… I think I love him, Evelyn.”
She nodded as if my confession wasn’t news to her. “Then tell him, honey. Don’t miss your chance.” She paused for a moment, a faraway look in her eyes. “Some of us aren’t that lucky.”