11. Haley
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Haley
The phone rang while I was at the counter eating toast I didn’t want.
I looked at the screen and felt my stomach drop. Mom. Which it hadn’t been in weeks. I’d been avoiding this call, putting it off, telling myself I’d deal with it when I was ready.
Apparently ready was now.
I already knew Janice Shaw was going to give me an earful.
“Hi, Mom.”
“Diane called me.”
Of course she did. Because why would Diane limit herself to ruining my life when she could also ruin my morning?
“Did she?”
“Do you have any idea how I found out my own daughter left her marriage?” My mother’s voice was sharp, the way it got when she was building up to a full lecture. “Like I was the last person in the world to know.”
“I was going to tell you.”
“When?” She let out a harsh laugh. “After half the city already knows you walked out. Everyone’s heard you’re carrying his child. And how you’ve refused to be reasonable about any of it.”
The toast went down like cardboard. I forced myself to swallow anyway.
“Reasonable.”
“That family took you in, Haley. They made you into somebody. And this is how you repay them? By dragging their name through the mud?”
“He cheated on me, Mom. For almost a year. With his assistant.”
A pause on the other end.
“Men have lapses.” Her voice went matter-of-fact, like she was explaining basic math to a child. “Your father had lapses. You don’t burn down a whole life over it. You keep your dignity and you keep your house.”
There it was. Dignity. The only word my mother had ever really worshipped.
I gripped the edge of the counter. “I don’t care about lapses. I care about my husband, well, ex-husband being a fucking pig.”
“Watch your mouth, Haley. I taught you better than this.”
I scoffed. “You taught me nothing useful. Just how to be an ideal wife to a dick of a husband.”
“And what’s your plan now?” She didn’t even acknowledge what I’d said. Just pushed right past it. “Pregnant, single, sleeping on a friend’s sofa, doing whatever it is you do with other people’s books. You think that’s a life Diane is going to let her grandchild grow up in?”
God, I was too tired for this. Too tired to fight both of them, lined up on the same side like they’d coordinated their attack.
“You know what, Mom? I don’t care what you think.”
“Excuse me?”
“I’m having this baby and I’m going ahead with all of it, and I’m done explaining myself to people who can’t manage one kind word.” I took a breath. “Thanks for calling.”
I hung up before she could land another punch.
My hands were steady. That surprised me. I’d expected them to shake, expected to feel the familiar tremor that came with confronting my mother. But they were still. Calm.
I finished the toast just to prove I could.
I didn’t decide to drive to Diane’s so much as find myself already doing it. One minute I was standing in Megan’s kitchen, and the next I was pulling out of the driveway with the heirloom necklace in its velvet box on the passenger seat.
The necklace had been a wedding gift. A Sinclair family piece, passed down through generations, given to me on my wedding day with all the ceremony and expectation that came with being absorbed into their world.
I’d worn it exactly three times in five years, always feeling like a fraud with it around my neck.
If they wanted to spend the morning deciding who I was, I’d give them a reason to remember.
The housekeeper let me in without comment. She’d worked for the Sinclairs for fifteen years and had perfected the art of seeing nothing and saying less. I followed the familiar path through the house, past the formal living room and the study, until I found Diane in the conservatory.
She was pretending to arrange flowers she had clearly already arranged. The orchids were perfect. The shears were spotless. The whole scene was staged, like she’d been waiting for an audience.
“Haley.” She didn’t look up from the flowers. “You should have called ahead.”
“I won’t be long.”
I walked to the glass table between us and set the velvet box down. The sound of it hitting the surface was louder than I expected.
“I’m returning this.”
“Don’t be dramatic.” She set down the shears and wiped her hands on a small towel. “Marriages have phases. You’ll feel foolish about all this in a year.”
“You called my mother.”
“Someone had to.” She folded the towel into a neat square. “I was hoping she still had some influence over you.”
“There’s nothing for her to influence. It’s done.”
“In that case, if you need a doctor to take care of this discreetly, let me know. I will arrange everything.”
“What do you mean?”
“Haley.” Diane’s voice sharpened. “Don’t be stupid about this. Think about what you’re throwing away.”
I couldn’t believe her. How could she? She had been the one begging to be a part of her grandchild’s life and now she wanted me to get rid of it.
God. The rich knew no bounds. How the fuck had I stayed married in this family for this long?
“I’m not throwing anything away.” I looked at her one last time. “I’m taking out the trash.”
I left the necklace where it sat, glittering on the glass, and walked out through the house I would never set foot in again.
In the driveway, my legs held.
My hands didn’t.
The keys rattled against each other so hard I couldn’t get them anywhere near the ignition. I tried three times, watching my fingers shake like they belonged to someone else, and finally I gave up.
I sat down on the low stone edge of Diane’s flowerbed because standing had stopped working.
The morning was bright around me. It was all so normal, so ordinary, and I was sitting on the ground outside my mother-in-law’s house trying to remember how to breathe.
I didn’t know how long I was there. Then a car slowed on the road.
I looked up and saw it pulling into the driveway. Black sedan. Tinted windows. Familiar plates.
James.
He was out of the car before the engine was even off, moving toward me with long strides, his face shifting from confusion to concern in the space of a heartbeat.
“Hey.” He crouched in front of me, his eyes scanning my face. “Hey, look at me.”
I looked at him. I didn’t know what my face was doing, but whatever it was made his jaw tighten.
“What did she do?”
“Nothing.” I shook my head. “Everything. I can’t-”
I held up the shaking keys like they explained it. Like they could communicate everything I couldn’t put into words.
“I can’t get them in the slot.”
“Then you’re not driving.”
He said it gently. No argument in it. Just settled, like it was already decided.
He took the keys out of my hand and pocketed them, then got an arm around me and brought me up off the stone, giving my head time to adjust.
“I’ve got you.” His hand was warm against my back. “I’ll have someone bring your car. Come on.”
He walked me to his car with his hand flat between my shoulder blades the whole way. I could feel the warmth of his palm through my shirt, the only thing keeping me from floating away entirely.
He opened the passenger door and waited while I folded myself in. The leather seat was cool against my legs.
He crouched one more time in the open door, his eyes level with mine.
“Buckle up for me.”
I did. My hands were still shaking, but I managed the clasp on the third try.
He watched me do it, making sure, then nodded once and shut the door.
Through the glass, I watched him stand there for a second. His jaw was tight. His hands were curled at his sides. He looked like he wanted to go back into that house and say things to his mother that couldn’t be unsaid.
But he didn’t.
He came around to his side, got in, and started the engine.
“Where are we going?” My voice came out rough, like I’d been screaming instead of sitting in silence.
“Anywhere you want.” He glanced at me as he pulled out of the driveway. “Name it.”
“I don’t know.” I leaned my head against the window. “I don’t know anything right now.”
“That’s okay.” His voice was quiet. “We’ll figure it out.”
We drove in silence for a while.
I turned to look at him finally and relayed most of what Diane said. “Maybe she’s right. I never understood him at all. I was just too stupid to see what was right in front of me.”
“Hey.” He glanced at me, his voice firm. “You’re not stupid. You trusted your husband. That’s what you’re supposed to do. The failure isn’t on you.”
“Feels like it is.”
“It’s not.” He reached over and put his hand on my knee, just for a second. “None of this is your fault, Haley. None of it.”
I wanted to believe him. I wanted to let his words sink in and replace all the poison Diane had poured into my head.
“She suggested I get rid of the baby.” The words came out flat.
James’s jaw went tight. His knuckles went white on the wheel.
“I’m going to pretend you didn’t just tell me that.” His voice was low, controlled. “Because if I think about it too long, I’m going to turn this car around and say things to my mother that can’t be taken back.”
“Don’t.” I put my hand on his arm. “She’s not worth it.”
“She’s not.” He glanced at me. “But you are.”
We drove in silence for a while longer. I didn’t ask where we were going. I didn’t care. I just watched the world blur past the window and let myself breathe.
“Thank you.” I said it quietly, almost to myself. “For showing up.”
“I didn’t plan to.” He kept his eyes on the road. “I was on my way to a meeting. Saw your car in the driveway and something felt wrong.”
“Lucky timing.”
“Something like that.” He glanced at me again. “You okay?”
“No.” I was honest about it. “But I will be.”
“Yeah.” He nodded slowly. “You will be.”
And the way he said it, like he believed it completely, like there was no doubt in his mind, made me almost believe it too.