Chapter 16
16
T he loud crack of thunder caused them to jump from a deep sleep. Selena curled up closer to Brogan, her head nuzzled on his chest, just under his chin.
He wrapped his arms around her tighter with a flash of lightning and, after a moment, a crash of thunder. “Are you scared?” He pressed a kiss to the top of her head, enjoying the memory of their night together.
Her finger trailed along his stomach, where the sheet rested low. “No. It's nice, though. Not having to listen to it alone. Mimi is probably up.” Her voice didn't hold any trace of sleepiness, although she spoke in whispers with him.
“Tina has her.” He kissed her hair again and rested his cheek on its softness.
“I know.” She took a deep breath, her exhale trickling warm air across his chest. “This is the first night in a year I've been away from her.”
Simultaneously, thunder boomed and lightning struck again. This time, they both jumped and then lightly laughed. “It'll move through soon.” Without the lightning, his room filled with complete darkness. He felt her head angle upward. Her lips pressed against his jaw. It seemed impossible that it would ever get old. Selena. In his arms. In the dark. In his bed.
He took a guarded breath. Why wasn't the rest of life this comfortable with her?
Her lips found his. The flash of heat from before was gone, replaced with nothing more than raw emotions. A little painful it hit so deep within him. With every press of his lips and touch of his tongue, he spelled out how much he cared, hoping she knew.
Last night reaffirmed the same revelation he'd experienced with their first kiss. Something inside him clicked into place. Now, the darkness helped. He didn't have to face the questions in her eyes. Expectations. Responsibility.
In the dark, it was only their two souls. Calling it love, when they were both so open, seemed trivial.
What pulled them closer together was something deeper than he knew the words to describe. So he didn't try. He'd give what he had and take what she offered. Cherish this one moment and figure out how to live with or without it in the morning.
Selena scanned through her email on her phone as Brogan drove her back to her apartment to change before work. “I don't think Cathal went to sleep last night. The last few of these emails came in at six this morning. He didn't have to do all this for me.”
Fifteen emails. All with information about possible ways to afford Mimi's stay at a nursing facility. She'd barely touched on the topic at dinner, both brothers asking how her grandmother was doing. Or granny, as they called her .
And now, it seems she had a friend willing to help. Focusing on Cathal's emails prevented her from analyzing her night with Brogan. His hand rested on her knee as he drove. What they had between them felt real and significant. He seemed to feel the same way if she read his signals right. Would it last or would he revert back to the aloof man that only acknowledged them behind closed doors?
She was royally screwed at this point. Love. It might not make sense to anyone else, but she loved her grouchy boss. The tender way he'd held her, loved her, put a hitch in her breath when he turned his brooding gaze her way.
“What else does he have to do?” Brogan asked.
She cleared her throat from the emotion. “Does he have another job? He is a lawyer, right?” She'd tried to figure out how to get Mimi into a home, but, everywhere she looked, either said her insurance wouldn't pay for it at this stage, or she had to pay out of pocket. Each time it frustrated her. In a matter of hours, Cathal had a game plan.
“He works for a firm when they need him. Odds and ends from what he says. You should let him help you with this.”
She wrinkled her nose and stared out the window as they pulled into her rundown apartment complex. “I hate asking for help.”
He parked and turned off the car. “Think of it this way.” He tucked her hair behind her ear, pulling her face close and kissing her lightly. “You're helping me with the restaurant, so he can help you with your granny.”
Exactly how a family treated one another. The emotion from before welled up inside. But she couldn't tell him she loved him. There were too many hurdles between them.
“I still feel bad he spent his entire night researching this, but I will accept his help. As much as I hate asking for help, there's no denying I haven't been successful on my own.” She pushed open the car door as Tina appeared in the doorway with a frantic look on her face.
Selena bolted up the steps, taking two at a time. “What's wrong?”
“She fell. Just now. I called for an ambulance—”
Selena pushed past her, Brogan right behind her. Mimi laid on the floor beside her bed.
Selena dropped to her knees beside her, immediately reaching for her head, cradling it in her hands.
Tina's voice shook when she spoke. “She called for me and then I heard her fall. She won't let me touch her now.” Tina sobbed out something else and left the room.
“Mimi?”
Mimi pulled away, crying, looking between Brogan and Selena with wide, scared eyes. It'd happened this way before. She'd snap back into another time when something scared her. Hurt her.
“Let me help you up,” Selena tried again, but Mimi lashed out at her with her other hand. The hand she clutched to her chest looked odd, her wrist hanging unusually.
Selena's stomach rolled. “I think she's broken her wrist.”
“Aye.” Brogan's hands gripped Selena's shoulders and pulled her up and to the side. Without giving her grandmother an option, Brogan squatted down and picked her up, setting her gently back on the bed even though Mimi got one or two strong slaps in with her good hand across his cheek and forehead.
Mimi held her wrist and rolled toward the wall, muffled sobs shaking her frail shoulders.
Brogan brought his arms around Selena, and only then did she feel the tears on her cheeks. Helplessly, she stared at the small form of her grandmother. This was why she needed the facility, with nurses who knew what to do. All she did was guess at what to do for Mimi.
The paramedics arrived, and Brogan left the cramped bedroom to give them space to work. They took Mimi's vitals and decided she did need to have a doctor look at her wrist. She still wasn't in her right frame of mind and flat out denied even knowing Selena. The paramedics asked Selena to meet them at the hospital in an attempt to keep Mimi calm.
Again, she was useless.
Selena watched the ambulance drive out of the apartment complex. She needed a shower. Change of clothes. Then she'd go by and pick Mimi up from the hospital.
“Have some coffee.” Brogan passed her a mug. “I watched how you made yours this morning.”
Their morning together seemed so long ago. Brogan’s sweetness eased her heart a little. “Thank you. I'll have to call for another nurse. Tina said she couldn't stay any longer today.”
“You don't have to come to work.” He leaned against the railing near the stairs that led to the parking lot. The early morning sunlight caused Brogan's eyes to glow a beautiful shade of cobalt blue.
Last night had changed things. An uncomfortable buzz of emotion swirled in her chest. She didn't think it was regret. Brogan hadn't shied away from her. Hadn't become distant. But he looked just as confused as she felt. Mimi's episode had catapulted them both straight back to reality.
“I might not have a choice but to take off today without a nurse. I'll need to go to the hospital in a couple of minutes and wait there until I can bring her home. I have the company’s laptop. I'll work on the party once I get her settled.”
“You don't—”
She held up her hand. “Please. It will give me something to take my mind off this,” she said as she motioned around her apartment complex. She didn't want to live like this, scraping every penny possible to take care of Mimi and never getting ahead.
Never giving Mimi everything she needed.
Never having a future with Brogan.
She wiped away the tears that'd formed again before they could fall. She hated crying. Between her love for Brogan leaving her exposed and the fear for her grandmother, Selena hated the overwhelming feelings threatening to bury her whole.
Brogan pushed off the railing and took a step to stand in front of her. He held onto her shoulders, his hands as firm as his tone of voice. “I know you can handle your granny, but let Cathal help, Selena.”
She swallowed over the lump in her throat. Her grandmother's situation was only partly to blame for the tears, burning her eyes. At the moment, she would focus on that situation and ignore her love for Brogan and the big mess that came along with that.
“I feel selfish. Like I shouldn't want all this freedom.”
“You are not selfish.” He cupped her cheek, his thumb brushing along her temple. “You're human.” He pressed his lips to hers, gliding her into a slow, steady kiss. He cared. That much she'd wrap around her for the moment. He was the only stable thing to hold onto, if only for a fleeting minute.
He lifted his head, a small smile on his lips. “Go grab a shower, as you mentioned. I'll drop you by Katie's to get your car as I go into work.”
She kissed him one more time. Last night had been wonderful. Back to reality today.
Brogan stood up as Selena walked into his office. She closed the door and sagged back against it. “Since when is coming to work supposed to feel like a vacation?”
He'd not seen her for two days. Two miserable days that'd left him feeling empty and disoriented. In an attempt to gain back a shred of control, he'd oversaw her shift personally, staying on the floor and running the dining room.
And his employees hated it.
But she was here now, and that made the chaos in his mind settle. Her dark circles, lightly visible underneath her makeup, matched her tired expression.
He walked to her, debating on how to greet her. Because once they opened the door and their workday began, he was back to square one with treating her like an employee. The way she absolutely hated.
He'd considered calling a big meeting with his staff and laying out the relationship for them, but that seemed partly ridiculous since he didn't even know what to call her. Girlfriend?
That sounded dumb at his age.
“Another bad night?” he asked.
She lifted a shoulder, watching him with her golden eyes. “Not as bad. The medicine helped her sleep. Tina is finally recovered from the trauma.” She reached out and tugged his tie, bringing him closer. “Kiss me and make this a good morning. ”
He'd do that every morning if he had any clue on how to get to that point with her. She shifted their kiss immediately. He wouldn't push her. Not with everything going on in her life.
But Selena's teeth grazed his lower lip, her hands gripping his shoulders, and, suddenly, there wasn't anything else in the world but the two of them.
It was his only explanation for reaching around her and locking the door.
She pulled his tie off his shirt and began to unbutton. “I want skin,” she mumbled against his lips.
He gripped her hips tighter. “Do I get skin, too?”
“As much as you want,” she said as she untucked his undershirt.
“No. Not that much.” He slid his hands underneath the back of her shirt, caressing the smooth skin of her lower back. “Once I start, I won't stop.”
“I probably won't say 'no' Brogan,” she said, a smile in her voice.
“I'm not a teenager that runs around with a condom in their wallet, Selena,” he replied.
Her hands slowed down then. “Oh.”
He laughed. “Sorry. I'll be sure to carry one around for us.”
“No. It's probably for the better.” She leaned back, resting her head against the door as her hands ran along the length of his chest. “That would make it hard to concentrate on work. All I'd do is try and figure out a way to be alone with you.”
If she stayed with him, they'd have that time in the morning together before they had to work. Which, unfortunately, they had to do.
“Speaking of that, you know we still have to keep all of this low key. It won't be forever, but please, let's get past the purchase of the property.” He smoothed her hair away from her face.
Her eyes narrowed and lips pursed. “How is it so easy for you to flip it on and off?”
He leaned his body into hers, pinning her against the door. “Don't think for one moment that I want this any less than you do. Cathal's livelihood. Rian's name. Everything I've worked for since coming here might be erased if I don't handle this right. Like O'Keeley's never existed.” He kissed her with a rough edge he tried to control and ended it just as quickly. “But I want you, Selena. All I'm asking for is a couple more weeks.”
He shifted, needing air.
Space.
Selena drove him to lose his mind. The thought of her walking away because he couldn't figure out how to be her boyfriend and her boss, made his head pound. And scared him. For the first time, he found someone worth giving up everything. But O’Keeley’s wasn't his to give up.
She began to button his shirt, keeping her eyes averted. “I'll play this your way, for now, Brogan.” As she buttoned the top button, she lifted her eyes to meet his gaze.
How had he ever thought anything between them would be simple?
Because based on the way she watched him, she was about to make his life hell. And damn it if he wouldn't enjoy every second of it.
“So what are the rules?” She lifted an eyebrow. “I assume I don't get to slap your ass as you walk by.”
He laughed, enjoying the playful way she ran her finger along the edge of his neck. “No. You don't. Nothing that lets anyone know we see each other outside this office. ”
“Then I'll only slap your ass while we're in the office.” She held up a finger. “With the door closed, obviously.”
“You're going to make this difficult, aren't you?”
“Did you have any doubt? I don't like feeling hidden like I'm not good enough for you.”
How could she ever think that? Jacob, the snake, had put that insecurity into her mind. “You're more than I deserve, Selena.” He slipped his tie behind his neck and tied it for a second time that morning.
She straightened his tie. “The only hope you have right now is that I'll sneak you into my bedroom after curfew.”
He smiled at her small laugh and dipped his head, bringing their mouths in line. “As long as that can happen tonight—”
Brogan’s head snapped up when a knock sounded at the door.
“Mr. O'Keeley? Sir?”
“Crap! It's Trey,” Selena whispered. “What's he doing here this early?”
Brogan shifted to the side. If he were behind closed doors with Selena, this early in the morning, it wouldn't take someone even as dense as Trey to figure things out.
“Go. Hide in the bathroom.”
Her mouth fell open. “You're actually hiding me now!”
“Yes.” He tucked in his shirt.
Selena shook her head with a mischievous look in her eyes that Brogan didn't trust. “Payback will be hell, Brogan.”
“I accept my punishment. Just go!” He waited for her to shut the bathroom door before opening the office door. “Trey? You're here early.”
“Yeah. I'd hoped to talk to either you or Selena. I saw her car out back. It's about my shift.”
Her car. The staff knew she was working extra hours in the morning, but no one except the kitchen staff had actually arrived while she was still in his office. And never behind closed doors.
And now Trey had nearly caught them.
Brogan pretended to look confused and stepped to the doorway, glancing around the dining room. “I don't know where she's run off to. Maybe the supply closet?”
Trey shrugged. “It's alright. I didn't know if I could get moved back to the second shift? My little brother just started a new job, and we have to share my car.” He scratched the back of his head, looking down at his shoes.
Brogan never remembered being that awkward in life. But, by the time he was fourteen, he was a significant source of income for his two younger siblings and mother. That didn't give him a chance to be awkward.
“Was there something else, Trey?”
“Yeah.” After a long pause, he finally made eye contact again. “Can I get some advice?”
Brogan crossed his arms. The longer Selena stayed in the bathroom, the worse the revenge. “What is it?”
“It's about a girl I like. Katie thought I should ask your brother's opinion.”
“What's your question?”
“Good morning!” Cathal appeared in the doorway. “Am I interrupting?”
Everyone was interrupting.
“Trey, this is my brother. I assume he's the one Katie suggested you consult with your woman problems.”
Cathal patted Trey on the shoulder. “You need to learn that women are the sources of all problems and all solutions. The solutions are much more fun, though. Speaking of women problems....” He raised his eyebrows, subtly glancing around the office. “How's yours coming along?”
Trey grinned, goofy and gap-toothed. “Wow. We all have women problems. Cool. Like male bonding.”
“It's not cool. And I do have things to do,” Brogan shot back.
Cathal glanced down. Selena's purse set on the bench just inside the door to the office. His eyes trailed around again, lingering on the closed bathroom door.
“Trey. I'm afraid Brogan can hardly handle his own problems at the moment. And by the looks of things, they are mounting by the second. I'll pour us both a coffee, and you can spill.” Cathal sent Trey toward the bar and then stuck his head back inside the office. “Please tell me you didn't hide her in the bathroom.”
The bathroom door swung open. Selena. Her eyes darker than usual and aimed his way in a death glare.
“Now who's the idiot?”
He shoved Cathal back out of his office but kept the door open.
She held up her hand when he started to speak. “Payback, Brogan.” Her shoulder skimmed his chest as she moved past him.
She paused at his office door, taking a brief look in the direction of the bar before she hurried across to the employee break room.
Watching her all day and then waiting until he could sneak into her apartment later to touch her would be payback. God knew what she had in store for him.