Chapter 17
17
H ow did he not get the message that she wanted him to leave? Selena had listened to Jacob ramble on for the past thirty-two minutes and fifteen seconds based on the digital clock on the bank sign just down the street from her apartment complex. It was also eighty-one degrees outside, and they offered a 1.2% interest rate on their car loans. It meant something that the billboard at the bank was more interesting than her ex-boyfriend's ramblings.
She wouldn't invite him inside. Her Southern grandmother, asleep, would have killed her. She'd expect Selena to invite him in, offer him something to drink and eat, and then listen to him with polite attention.
But she didn't care. She wouldn't have answered the door at all except she'd expected Brogan. But, knowing her behind-the-scenes boyfriend, he'd take one look at Jacob, throw a very quiet fit about her talking to him, and not even venture near her apartment until he left.
Help them all if the banker knew they were dating.
“I think the next movie we watch we should do it together.” Jacob smiled and pulled out his phone. “What are you doing next weekend?”
She almost replied with ‘I'm washing my hair’ but managed to hold it in. “I don't know yet. I don't know if I'm working.”
“Do you work every day of the week?”
“If I'm lucky.”
He reached out and set his hand on her shoulder. “I hate seeing you so run down like this.”
“Then you can leave any time,” Brogan's voice replied from the end of the balcony.
She snapped her head his direction. When had he shown up? And he'd actually shown himself in front of Jacob.
“I didn't expect you here.” Jacob didn't drop his hand. Instead, as if they had something more between them, Jacob moved closer, his hand sliding to rest at the back of her neck.
Selena was trapped. Her next step would put her back inside her apartment. Her position, standing firm at the threshold, was the last line of defense before etiquette forced her to offer him a glass of sweet tea.
Brogan's eyes lingered on Jacob's hand. “Is this a bad time, Selena?”
“No.”
“Yes,” Jacob answered. “We were setting up our plans for next weekend.”
He crossed his arms, towering over both of them. “Ah. You've a mind to go on a date next weekend?”
“Yes.”
“No.” Selena glanced at Jacob, suddenly hating how close he stood. His eyes were soft. His chin was weak. He wasn’t Brogan. “I'm not dating you again, Jacob. I've told you that at least a dozen times.”
“But—”
“No.” She moved his hand from her shoulder. “Look. I've tried to be friends with you, but I can't do that if you're only here because you expect us to pick up where we left off.”
Jacob motioned toward her apartment. “Things could have worked out so differently for you, for both of us, if we'd pushed through our problems back then. You're not the least bit curious if we still have a connection?”
“No.” She might not live the life he did, nice car, an apartment with hot water, but she busted her ass to get what she'd had. Brogan had never once offered to swoop in, pay for everything, insinuate that she wouldn't live in this lifestyle if she allowed him to take care of her.
She appreciated that. Pride meant something to her.
“I guess there's nothing left to say.” Jacob stuffed his hands in his pockets and turned. His eyes held Brogan's for a brief moment before he scuffed his feet all the way down the stairs. Extra slow. As if he gave her time to change her mind.
They waited, in silence, until his car drove out of the apartment complex.
“Look, I know you have a dozen questions.”
He stalked toward her, his expression unreadable.
She backed up and into her apartment. Was he mad? If she’d shown up at his condo with a woman touching him, acting as though they were “together” she’d be mad as hell right then.
He closed the door. “No.” He held her chin lightly with his fingers. “That idiot is the last person I want to think about.”
His kiss confirmed why he'd come to her apartment. “ Tell me now if you don't want this,” he murmured against her lips. “Turn me away. Kick me out.”
“But I promised you revenge.” She tugged at the t-shirt he'd worn, pulling it over his head as they stumbled down the narrow hall.
“Is this it?” He did the same to her, dropping her shirt in the floor of her room as he shut the door behind him.
She shook her head. “No. I was going to tease you. Make you want me.” She smiled against his lips. “Wear something short and skimpy and make you drool. And hold out as long as I could.”
“And now?” His fingers nimbly unfastened the button of her jeans. “Are you turning me away?”
“Jacob bored me so bad I'd rather have the action over revenge at the moment.”
“Thank the Lord,” he murmured against her neck as her head dropped back. He trailed his lips back up and kissed her again.
He tasted of whiskey, a flavor she knew now from Cathal. “Why were you drinking?” Because he didn't.
“Because I changed my mind two dozen times about coming over here.” He pushed her jeans down her hips.
She laughed as she began to unfasten his jeans. “If you have to drink to sleep with me, we might need to reevaluate this entire situation.”
“I had one drink, and it was to get out of my own damn way and stop coming up with excuses not to drive over here. Believe me,” he said, softly cupping her cheek. The blue of his eyes felt magical for a moment. His voice was rough when he spoke. “I plan to memorize every, single, inch of your body tonight.”
Revenge would definitely have to wait .
Cathal worked alongside Selena at Brogan's dining room table. He sipped on his beer and typed into a laptop that cost more than three months of Selena's rent.
And he tried to find a solution to her grandmother's situation.
He filled out form after form on her behalf. It'd take her an entire week to do as many as he had. But he understood things like that. She didn't have the patience to figure it out. Instead, Selena threw everything she had into planning the party.
Part of her was nervous that after declining Jacob's offer, that he'd somehow pull back on the loan. But the loan was still firmly in place, if Jacob had even tried.
Five hundred thousand was their new goal.
Selena priced out the tickets and estimated the number of people who would come. It gave her a general guess at a profit from the bar.
The best she came up with was three hundred and fifty thousand. They were still short.
She sat back and rubbed her temples.
Brogan's strong hands rested on her shoulders, kneading them. “Oh my God, this might be better than sex,” she mumbled.
Cathal's head whipped up. “A neck massage? I obviously need to have a long talk with my brother.”
She giggled at his mock outrage. “Your brother is just fine.”
“Fine?” Brogan repeated in a low voice.
She looked up to where he stood behind her, trying not to laugh at his offended expression.
“I still think I should have that talk,” Cathal murmured. “Maybe pull in Rian for a tutorial. ”
Selena slapped playfully at Cathal's shoulder. “Don't bother. It's not like I'm going to get into details with you.”
Cathal lifted a shoulder. “Sure, then. I'll just sweet talk them from Katie.”
“Katie?” Brogan's horrified voice made both Cathal and Selena grin. “Surely, you didn't—”
“No, I didn't.” She sighed and set her interlaced hands on the table in front of her. “Brogan is amazing, and all I do is try to plan a way for us to be together again. Satisfied?”
Cathal cut his eyes at Brogan. “I'm not the one that needs to leave here satisfied.”
Brogan dropped a kiss on the top of her head. “I apologize for my brother. Both of them, as Rian would be no better if he were here. How far are you into the planning?”
“With all my estimates, at most the pub can make about three hundred and fifty.” There. She'd said it. She didn't want to disappoint him. They'd done so much to help her and, she'd failed to construct an event to raise the full amount. But she couldn't charge any more for the tickets. She'd consulted three experts, foodies who went to these types of events often, and none of them thought it'd be successful with a higher ticket price. Not with their level of clients, working-class that wanted a pint and good food.
Brogan's eyes shifted to Cathal, and he shook his head. “You know I don't want to do that.”
“Do what?” She asked.
Cathal shrugged. “Our property back in Ireland can be put up for collateral. We can pull the rest of the money from there. We already have approval from the bank.”
“Seriously? That would be great.”
“No. It wouldn't. It puts everything we have at risk.” Brogan crossed his arms.
Selena stood up, rubbing her hands up and down his biceps, trying to ease his tension. She'd never owned anything in her life except her small car. Taking that kind of risk would be nerve-racking. But she believed in them.
“Trust yourself and your brothers. If they're both in agreement, then that would mean you're outvoted in the matter.” She smiled as his frown deepened. “All three of you own the bar. All three of you own the property. Not just you.”
“I listen to them—”
She kissed him hard and quick, shutting him up. “That's not what I meant. You're not responsible for everything. The world doesn't rest on your shoulders. You aren't the only one responsible if you don't save O'Keeleys. Or if you do lose the land.” She slipped into his arms when he finally uncrossed them. “You weren't responsible for Simmons.”
His arms tightened.
“Or for Crissy.”
“How did you know about that?”
“The internet.” She glanced over her shoulder. “And a little bit from your brother.”
Cathal shrunk lower behind the screen of his computer as Brogan glared at him.
She understood Brogan and his reservations better after that. But it'd confused her as well. Surely he didn't think of her the same way, that she was playing him for money. That was worse than him hiding her away, for whatever the reason may be.
“You've got to let them share some of the responsibility.” She rose on her toes and kissed him. “Let me share it with you. I'm planning this thing. If it goes bad—”
“It won't be your fault.”
She smiled. “Hell yes, it will be. At least partly.” And she didn't have a dime to her name to help with the purchase of the building.
But she supported him because she loved him. He might not be ready to hear that yet, but she did. And pulling it back now seemed impossible.
As long as he didn't continue to hide her in bathrooms.
She kissed him again. “I need to get going. We have an early morning. The tickets to the event go on sale tomorrow. I have a few radio spots I've snagged.”
Brogan shifted away. “I'm not going on the radio.”
“No.” She pointed at Cathal. “But he is.”
“Me?” His crooked smile only added to his wicked charm. “You think I'd be good on the radio?”
“I think you'll be the best one to do it. Rian is barely participating as it is. Brogan, bless his heart, would sound like a public service announcement. You, on the other hand, have a personality.”
“I'm not sure I like your description of me,” Brogan said. “I have a personality.”
Yes. He did have a great personality. But getting him naked and coercing it out of him was out of the question. The longer he stared at her, the more she realized his thoughts had headed in the exact same direction.
“Can I come by later?” he asked.
“Please, do.” And she left, without giving in and dragging him to his glorious king-sized bed.
“Where's our famous chef?” Selena snapped out the question as she walked into Brogan's office. “I have a food blogger here to interview him now. Two more a little later.”
She'd worn a suit.
A nice, tidy suit with closed-toe high heels .
“You look very nice,” he said. That stopped her.
She smoothed a hand down her skirt. “It's Katie's.”
“You don't own a suit?” The question popped out before he realized it'd been a mistake. Her pleased expression closed off.
“No. I don't.”
“I didn't mean it as anything more than a simple question.”
Her shoulders relaxed—a little. “I know. I'm just peeved at your brother. Any idea when the famous O'Keeley will make an entrance?”
“He'll be here. He just got in this morning from Ireland.”
“Can you call him and find out when? I'd like to let the blogger know.” She tapped her foot. Her eyes narrowed. “Why are you smiling?”
“Because you're such a fierce little thing and for once your annoyance isn't aimed my direction.”
“Oh. Just wait. I'm sure you'll get the next round. Stop grinning like that.”
He waved her forward. “Then come here and let me apologize for my brother's tardiness.”
Surprise popped into her expression. He had to get past his issues. He'd taken what she'd said to heart the night before. Not everything was his responsibility. It still felt that way. Logically, he knew otherwise.
She scooted around his desk to stand in front of him.
He kissed her, refusing to give in to the urge to unwrap her, layer by layer, out of the suit. Her hips bumped against his desk. If he took another step, he'd set her on top, step between her legs, and then, help him, he’d use that one condom he’d finally shoved in his wallet.
He unbuttoned the top button of her dress shirt. And then a second one .
“Someone’s feeling frisky this morning,” she mumbled before grazing her teeth along his earlobe.
Cats were frisky. Brogan needed his hands on Selena. His Selena.
The second, third, and fourth button unfastened.
“Ms. Chapman?”
Selena broke the kiss at the sound of her name called from the dining room. Heavy footsteps headed the direction of the office.
“Shit!” She looked around, her hands gripping her shirt together.
“Down,” he murmured.
She complied before shooting him a murderous look.
Yes.
He'd just hidden her underneath his desk.
That wouldn't end well.
Not a half-second later, a large man with a long beard appeared in the doorway. “I was looking for Selena Chapman.”
“I'm Brogan O'Keeley.”
The man moved into the room. Selena was officially stuck.
“Nice to meet you. I'm Kenneth. I run a food blog. I was hoping to interview Rian O'Keeley.”
“I'm here.” Rian rushed into the room. “Sorry, just flew in from Ireland.”
“For real?” Kenneth shook his hand. A little bit of awe covered the man's face. “Were you doing a food event?”
“No. Checking on some family business.” He tilted his head toward Brogan. “That I got resolved. So, everything is set.”
That meant he got the money off the land. He swallowed down that rush of anxiety and tried to focus on what Selena said.
Brogan sat down at his desk, giving him a clear view of her as she finished buttoning her shirt. She sat back on her knees, her arms crossed, glaring at him. Her bottom lip poked out a little bit farther than normal. He had a sudden urge to kiss her.
“Where is Selena?” Rian asked.
Brogan drummed his fingers on the desk. “She's currently, um, detained. She'll be along shortly if you'd like to go to the upstairs dining room and start the interview.”
Rian's lips pressed into a firm line, and he knocked on Brogan's desk. “Good luck.”
Brogan needed more than good luck. Rian and the blogger left the room, and Brogan pushed back in his chair to let Selena up. He offered her his hand, but she ignored it.
“Brogan O'Keeley,” she began, sounding just like his Ma when she was angry.
He moved back, holding up his hands, trying to contain his laugh. “I panicked.” He walked over to the door, closing it and locking the doorknob. He didn't need anyone to walk in on this.
“I'm finally going to ask this. Are you ashamed of me?”
He blinked at the left turn her comment took. “Ashamed? No. Never. I've told you that before.” He was a lucky bastard such a wonderful woman like Selena would give him so many chances. He wanted to tell everyone about her. But some things were harder to overcome.
“Do. Not. Hide. Me. Again.” She crossed her arms. “Because I think it will be pretty easy to keep my hands to myself after that stunt. Under a damn desk? Seriously!” She shouted and started to brush past him. He reached for her arm, stopping her with a soft touch. “I don't think you want to do that right now.”
“Selena—”
“No.” She turned toward him, pushing him back with one finger on his chest until his back hit the door to his office. “You don't get to touch me. Not until I tell you to.”
“Is this your revenge?” He smiled, thinking it was payback for a split second until she didn’t respond, her golden eyes serious. Now he was worried.
She yanked his head down to hers, kissing him with a wildness that rocked him deeply. He gripped her hips, but her hands encircled his wrists, slamming them back against the door harder than he’d give her credit for.
“I told you not to touch me.”
“But—”
She kissed him again. His hands fisted into tight balls. It was torture then. She apparently didn't have the same rules seeing as she explored his body as much as she pleased.
He moved his hand but caught himself at the last second. She obviously wanted to prove something. She wanted control.
He was as easily frustrated as a toddler by not getting to touch her in return.
She broke the kiss, both of them breathing heavily.
“Can I touch you now?”
“No.”
“That wasn't very nice of you,” he said. His voice sounded strained.
“Neither is someone feeling embarrassed of you.”
She'd mentioned Jacob had done that to her. Hidden her away. The mental image of her kissing him that way sent Brogan over the edge before he had a chance to pull in his anger .
“Is this how you handled Jacob, too?”
Her mouth dropped open, her eyes wide.
Wrong thing to say. Again.
She pointed her finger at him. “I accepted the way Jacob treated me. I believed, for a very long time, that I wasn't as worthy as other women. Kissing you and not letting you touch me was the revenge I thought of when you hid me in the bathroom. It was the only thing I could think to do to get that feeling out of my system. Off my skin. To feel something other than inadequacy. To feel in control and know you really wanted me.”
“I'm sorry. I didn't realize....”
She crossed her arms. “Move. I want to leave.”
He thought about forcing her to keep talking. But he couldn't do it now. Rian and the blogger expected her for the interview.
“We're going to talk about this later.”
She lifted a shoulder. “We'll see.”
He nodded and shifted to the side. She left his office. He closed his eyes and leaned against the wall. Two and a half more weeks until he'd rewrite every employment contract if necessary to give himself and Selena permission to be together.