Chapter Twenty-One #2
My hands make their way to the button of his jeans, and he groans, throwing my panties across the room. I unbutton his jeans, then unzip them, and they fall to the floor. His hard cock stands to attention in front of me while he devours me with his eyes. The need shown in them is overwhelming.
“I love you, Colt,” I repeat as he moves in closer. His mouth crashes into mine when he pulls me closer to the edge of the desk.
“Again,” he demands against my lips, his hand grabbing a fist full of my hair, pulling tightly.
“I love you, Colt.”
Without warning, he slams his cock into me hard, and I yelp from the sudden fullness. He moans loudly, tugging on my hair, takes a firm hold of my neck and squeezes lightly, and starts to move inside me frantically, making my ass chafe on the desk.
“Again, Dee,” he urges as he pounds into me relentlessly.
“I… love… you… Colt,” I stress each word breathlessly as he thrusts so hard that all the air is knocked from my lungs.
He tugs on my hair, his hand falling away from my neck, which causes my head to loll back so my neck is open to him. Then he leans down and sucks on my skin, hard enough that I’m sure he’s marking me. Even though there’s a twinge of pain with how he’s fucking me, I am turned on.
When emotions are running high, Colt is usually rough in the bedroom, but there’s something different about tonight. Desperation laces every thrust, except I’m not sure why.
“Again,” he yells as he drives into me.
It’s hard to think between the sensations running through me. I moan from the pleasure unfolding inside me, trying to form the words he wants to hear. “God, I love you, Colt,” I murmur while his moans fill the air around us as he starts to tense.
My hands fist in his hair as he slams inside me, and he watches me.
His breathing is short and rushed, as is mine.
Colt’s eyes are dark with anguish. I think he’s seeking the reassurance that I won’t leave him, that I love him more than anything, so I tell him again, “I’m so in love with you, Colter Slade.
” Those words push him over the edge, and with one last thrust, he explodes inside me hard with a drawn-out moan.
His forehead presses against mine, our breaths mingling, bodies still fused. His chest rises and falls, but something feels different, lighter, as if the weight that once crushed him has finally eased, if only for a moment.
After Colt gently kisses my lips and pulls out, he strips us of our remaining clothes before picking me up off the desk and carrying me to the bed, where he lies me down softly. My eyes track his every movement, and I fight the urge to ask him if he is okay or ask unnecessary questions.
Instead, I remind him one more time, “I love you, Colt,” as he joins me on the bed, and I move to straddle him.
***
Three weeks into our month-long break before we hit the road again, Colt and I have been going out as much as possible, anything to avoid the drugs Hux keeps bringing home.
Since the night Colt needed my reassurance, he’s been better. Stronger.
Whenever Hux strolls in with a bag of coke, Colt doesn’t tense up as much. The cravings are still there. I can see it in his eyes, but he’s handling it. And as much as it worries me, I don’t push.
Today, we’re all heading to the studio to hear the final cut of “Until the End of Time,” the track the band laid down during the first week of our break. Colt is buzzing with excitement, and even Hux seems unusually upbeat.
“So Dee, how does it feel to know this song is about you?” Hux asks from the back of the car.
I turn in my seat to look at him. “I guess I never really thought about that. It’s wonderful that Colt’s written something so beautiful about me.”
Nothing more is said, but a strange energy lingers in the air. I don’t think Hux meant anything by it, but who knows?
We pull up to the studio and step inside, this time into a smaller space that’s more office than studio. The vibe is different, more intimate. Rob greets us at the door, and for once, we’re the first to arrive.
Colt guides me to the couch, where we settle in, while Hux drifts toward the window, gazing out at the garden, lost in thought.
“So, how’s your rest been, Colt?” Rob asks, sitting on the sofa opposite us.
“Yeah, good to have some downtime with the missus. When we return to the tour, I’m gonna make sure we continue having our separate room.”
“That’s fine, but I want you to ensure you arrive at meetings on time. I know how you can get carried away, and you think you can show up when you like. You have to commit to this band if you want it to continue to be a success, Colt,” Rob states.
“Don’t worry, Rob, it’ll all be good,” Colt replies.
“Sladenator… how the fuck are ya?” Dingo calls out as he and Sia walk in.
It feels like forever since we last saw them.
“Hey, guys, how’s your holiday been?” I ask, but Sia rolls her eyes, so I raise an eyebrow in curiosity.
“I got a vintage Xbox the day after we got back. Guitar Hero is… the shit. I’m thinking I might swap the sticks for some riffs. What do you think?” Dingo asks with a laugh.
“Fuck no, I don’t want to give you a big head or anything, but your drumming kicks arse, so you should stick to that,” Hux replies, winking at Sia. Colt and I laugh as Dingo nods in agreement, completely oblivious to the fact that everyone is making fun at his expense.
“Yeah, I guess I am pretty fucking hot at what I do. You only have to listen to what I did in “Until the End of Time.” That shit was my best work yet,” Dingo praises himself while we all chuckle.
“You guys starting the party without us?” I hear Anna ask before I see her. Johnny walks in, Anna trailing behind him, and they all smile.
“Okay, great. Now that we’re all here…” Rob’s gaze sweeps over each of us, his expression unreadable. “Let’s run through the single and make sure we’re all on the same page.” His tone is firm, leaving no room for argument.
Anna settles in beside me as we all squeeze together. The moment her arm wraps around my shoulders in a tight hug, I realize how much I’ve missed her.
“I missed you,” I whisper to her.
“I know, we need some girl time,” she whispers back.
“If you ladies want to gossip, please leave. We’re here for serious business. And if you can’t keep quiet while we’re working, may I suggest you take your conversation elsewhere?” Rob deadpans, his gaze locked on us like a disapproving schoolteacher.
Anna and I exchange a look before sinking back into the couch, feigning innocence. The moment Rob turns away, Anna sticks her tongue out at him. The entire room erupts in laughter. That is everyone except Rob, who looks around, utterly clueless, which only makes us laugh harder.
Rob walks over to the sound system. “Do you want to hear your fucking smash hit or what?” he asks, sounding more than a little annoyed.
Geez, he’s so grumpy.
The guys start cheering, and I notice a faint smile appear on Rob’s lips.
Maybe Rob does have a heart.
Colt takes my hand as the drum solo kicks in. The room falls silent as we listen, every note sinking deep. I can’t help but become a little emotional—this song is about me. And maybe I’m biased, but damn, it’s absolute rock gold.
As the final chord fades, I glance around. Everyone’s smiling, but no one speaks. We sit there, exchanging looks, letting the weight of the moment settle over us.
Colt’s grip on my hand is so tight when he turns to face me. “Thank you.”
I look at him with my brows raised. “What did I do?”
“You inspired this year’s biggest hit single,” he replies as the other guys smile.
Anna nudges me, as if I should be proud of myself.
But I didn’t do anything—I just got homesick.
This song isn’t mine. The band created it, poured their talent into it.
I had nothing to do with the music. A flush of embarrassment creeps up my neck, and judging by the look on Anna’s face, it must show.
“Oh, Little Bean’s gone all shy,” Dingo teases, grinning. “Sprout, Little Bean, and own that shit. If it weren’t for you, we wouldn’t have this song.”
Everyone nods in agreement, but I groan internally.
Man, I hate being the center of attention.
I shake my head, roll my eyes, and snuggle into Colt, letting him be my shield from their attention. He chuckles, holding me tightly as Rob restarts the track.
When the song finishes for the second time, the room erupts in cheers.
Rob raises a hand, cutting through the excitement. “Okay, okay, calm down, you lot. Since you all love the song so damn much, I’m sending copies to the radio stations tonight. By this time tomorrow, it’ll be a new release. Let’s see if the rest of the world gets as excited as you twats.”
As the room buzzes with excitement, I should be right there with them, soaking it all in, celebrating this moment. But beneath the thrill, a whisper of doubt lingers.
Colt’s cravings.
They haven’t disappeared, just dulled, waiting beneath the surface.
What triggered them?
Was it the pressure of the band?
The past clawing at him?
Me? No. That doesn’t make sense. I am his escape, his distraction.
But is that all I am?
I tighten my grip on his hand as if I can anchor him—anchor us.
Someone starts the song again, pulling me from the spiral. The melody wraps around me, the lyrics sinking in, Colt’s voice raw and powerful. And as he looks at me, eyes full of something fierce and unshakable, the doubt fades.
In this moment, I know nothing can tear us apart.