~Chapter 20~
Cedric's POV:
Now that I've found him.
I never thought for a second that this.
The...possibility of him being pregnant and carrying my baby.
The...possibility of not being able to see my baby.
Because he doesn't want to keep it.
Damn it
Who could I lie to...
I would go crazy. I want my baby and I want him too.
I'm not going to stop telling him how much I love him and the baby until the baby is in my arms.
Even though he said he'd hold it.
I hope so.
---
After having breakfast with his parents and his brother, who, honestly, is a real asshole..he went outside.
Of course.
He needs space.
It shows.
It feels.
And… for the first time in my life, I’m not trying to stop him.
I let him go.
Because if I push him now… I’ll lose him.
And that’s not an option.
I stand in the kitchen for a few seconds after he leaves.
The silence isn’t awkward.
It’s…
calculated.
Samuel is the first to sigh loudly.
“I swear you two are a bad movie.” I don’t look at him.
It’s not worth it.
Selene glances at him.
“Samuel.”
Her tone is enough to silence him… for the moment.
Fenric says nothing.
He calmly wipes his hands with a towel, as if nothing at all has happened.
But I know this kind of silence.
It’s before something.
I shift my weight slightly onto one foot.
I wait.
I don’t speak first.
I never speak first in these kinds of situations.
Because whoever speaks first…gives ground.
“Are you going to stay?” Fenric finally asks.
Direct.
No detours.
I like that.
I look back at him without blinking.
“Yes.”
One word.
That’s enough.
His gaze doesn’t change.
But I can feel it.
It weighs on me.
“You’re not from here.” It’s not a question.
“No.” I answer calmly.
Pause.
Samuel lets out a small “psst,” as if he wants to say something, but he holds back.
For his own good.
Fenric takes a step closer.
Not aggressively.
But not friendly either.
“And yet… you’ve arrived at my house.
”
“Not for the house.” I say.
For a split second…
something changes.
Small.
But there.
Selene looks up at me slightly.
Samuel looks between us, interested.
Fenric crosses his arms.
“For my son.”
I’m not confirming.
I’m not denying.
There’s no need.
It’s visible.
It’s felt.
Silence falls between us.
Then…
“If you hurt him…” he begins.
“I won’t.” I interrupt.
Calmly.
Firmly.
I don’t raise my voice.
I don’t justify myself.
I’m just telling the truth.
Silence again.
But different.
It’s no longer about whether I can stay.
It’s about… how long.
Fenric looks at me for a few more seconds.
Then he nods.
A small movement.
Almost imperceptible.
“We’ll see,” he says.
It’s not acceptance.
But neither is it refusal.
I turn my head toward the door.
Out.
To him.
The sun is streaming in through the window, cutting the kitchen into pieces of light and shadow.
I take a deep breath.
Now…
I can turn back to him.
And this time, I’m not going to let him out of my sight.
---
I’m not leaving right away.
I could.
I should.
But I stay a second longer than necessary.
I look at him.
Lying on the chaise longue, eyes closed, the sun on his face, and that peace he almost never has.
Idris.
I run my tongue over my lower lip, trying to keep my thoughts in check.
This is not the time.
Not here.
Not now.
“I’m not going far.” I say again, more for myself than for him.
He doesn’t answer.
Or maybe I didn’t hear him.
It doesn’t matter.
He knows.
He always does this...he withdraws, but without leaving completely.
I understand him more than I should.
I take a step back.
Then another.
The distance between us grows.
And I don't like it.
Not at all.
But if I want to stay.
..I have to do things the right way.
Not the way I want.
I turn around.
My steps are quiet on the gravel, but in my head there's anything but quiet.
Child.
That word won't leave.
It sticks to me.
To my thoughts.
To every breath.
His child.
Ours.
My jaw tightens slightly.
No.
I'm not going to lose this.
I'm not going to lose him.
Not after I've found him.
I enter the house without saying anything to anyone.
I don't stop.
I don't look back.
Straight to the door.
I grab my jacket from where I threw it earlier.
My phone. My keys.
Automatically.
Like a reflex.
Samuel's voice comes from behind:
"What, are you leaving already?
I thought you were staying for the soap opera. "
I ignore him.
Completely.
It's not even worth a reply.
I reach for the doorknob.
I stop.
For a split second.
My gaze instinctively falls on the window that overlooks the courtyard.
I can't see it completely.
Just part of it.
Enough.
I exhale slowly.
Then I open the door.
The outside air hits me again.
Different now.
Warmer.
Or maybe it's just... I'm different.
I walk down the steps without haste.
Every step is calculated.
Because I know exactly where I'm going.
And why.
The phone vibrates in my pocket.
I pull it out.
His name appears on the screen.
My father.
Exactly what I needed.
I look up at the sky for a second.
Then I answer.
"Yes."
Pause.
"I'm not going to be in charge much longer.
The pack belongs to you now."
His voice comes immediately.
Calm. Authoritarian.
Home.
My jaw clenches.
I turn my head once more toward the house.
To him.
Even if he can't see me.
"We'll talk later.
" I say simply.
And I hang up.
I put the phone in my pocket.
Take a deep breath.
That's it.
It begins.
I head to the car without stopping.
But one thing is clear. I'm not going back alone.
--
I get out of the car and take a few deep breaths, a few times.
It's not something I do often. It's not something an Alpha does often.
But in this pack...everything is different.
Even Alpha suddenly seems like too much.
I get to my feet and start walking towards the stairs that lead to the main house of this pack.
Where I plan to meet Alpha to take my boyfriend with me.
I open the doors.
The air inside is heavy. Thick.
To make you afraid of this man until you meet him.
The doors close behind me with a dry sound.
Everything works according to the rules.
According to hierarchies.
According to him.
I'm not going straight ahead.
Not here.
Not without announcing it.
My gaze stops at the desk on the right.
A secretary, who by the smell seems to be an omega.
He stands straight, his back perfectly straight, as if if he moves too much…
he’ll break something invisible.
His eyes immediately go up when he sees me.
Recognition.
And… tension.
He stands up almost instantly.
“Sir,” he says calmly, but his voice is a little too attentive.
He quickly gathers some papers, just so he has something to do with his hands.
I approach without haste.
Every step is controlled.
Every movement… intentional.
I stop in front of his desk.
I don’t lean.
I don’t relax.
I just… sit.
“I have a meeting with Alpha.”
My voice is low.
Without asking.
Without explaining.
The omega nods immediately.
Too quickly.
As if he was expecting it.
“Of course!” he replies. Short pause. “He’s waiting for you.”
Of course he’s waiting for me.
---
I reach his office door and knock.
I wait.
Too long.
“You can come in” comes from the room, muffled.
I open the door and close it behind me.
I raise the receipt towards him, he looks at me. Steady on him. He smiles.
"Alpha Loxley. I didn't expect to see you around here. The last time was a long time ago when they still had diapers" He says and gestures to the chair in front of him.
I take my time sitting down.
I look at him.
Directly.
Without blinking.
"Alpha Ben." I say instead.
Simple.
Controlled.
His smile doesn't disappear.
It changes.
He becomes... more attentive.
He rests his elbows on the desk, his fingers clasped together in front of him.
“That’s all?” he asks, slightly amused. “No introductions? No courtesies?”
I take a step forward.
Then another.
And only then do I sit down.
Slowly.
Without taking my eyes off him.
“We’re not here to waste time, Sir. We’re doing quality work.”
Pause.
Brief.
But enough.
Alpha Ben studies me.
Not superficially.
Deeply.
As if trying to see if I’m the same…or if I’ve changed.
“No.” he finally says. “You’re not.
”
I don’t react.
I don’t correct him.
I don’t question him.
I let him continue.
He leans back in his chair.
Relaxed.
Too relaxed.
“I’ve heard interesting things.
” His gaze locks onto me. “About you.”
“Same.” I reply.
A corner of his mouth lifts.
“You still have a big mouth like your father.”
“I still don’t like wasting time.
”
Silence.
But not tense.
It’s…
a duel.
“Then tell me,” he continues.
His voice becomes lower. More serious. “Why are you here?”
I’m not avoiding.
I’m not masking.
He’s not the type of man for this.
“For Walden.”
Pause.
And this time…I feel it.
His gaze changes.
Not much.
But enough.
"One of my beta's Children." he says simply.
He doesn't ask.
He knows.
"Idris." I correct him.
Silence.
Then…he laughs softly.
"You call him by his name." His head tilts slightly to the side.
"Interesting for Loxley"
I don't react.
It's not a new challenge.
"I want him.
" I say directly.
The smile disappears.
Completely.
The room seems to tighten around us.
"It's not an object." he says calmly.
But under the calm…
it's a little harder.
"I didn't say it was."
I hold my position.
The gaze.
The breath.
"Then rephrase." I inhale slowly. Without taking my eyes off him. “I choose him.”
Silence.
Long.
Alpha Ben stands up.
Slowly.
Circumambulating the desk.
Every step he takes is calculated.
Just like mine.
He stops in front of me.
Too close for most.
Perfect for an Alpha.
“You know the rules,” he says.
His voice is low now.
Hard to ignore.
“I know.”
“You know what this means.”
“Yes.”
His gaze hardens.
“Then say it.”
I don’t blink.
I don’t hesitate.
“It means I don’t play by your rules anymore.”
Silence.
Then…He smiles.
But this time…he’s not friendly at all.
“Wrong.”
He leans slightly toward me.
“It means you’re going to make sure the rules change… without destroying everything.”
My jaw tightens.
“I can do that.”
He tilts his head.
Analyzing.
Judging.
“And if you can’t?”
Pause.
Brief.
“Then I’ll destroy everything.”
For a split second…
the silence becomes dangerous.
Then…
Alpha Ben laughs.
Brief.
“That’s what I wanted to hear.
”
He walks away.
Back to the office.
As if the decision has already been made.
“You have two days,” he says without looking at me.
“Prove to me that you can bring me the completed papers of the Graypine Pack extraction…of Mr. Fenric. His father and the beta of my pack.”
My heart beats faster.
Not out of fear.
Out of… stake.
"And if I succeed?" He stops.
Without turning around completely.
"Then.
.." Pause. "I won't stop you from taking it anymore.
" and starts laughing with his dying old laugh.
That's it.
That's enough.
I get up.
Without rushing.
Without saying anything else.
Because I already know what's coming.
I turn to the door.
Hand on the doorknob.
Two days.
For him.
For us.
For the child.
And I'm not going to lose.
---
My hand is still on the doorknob when the phone starts vibrating again in my pocket.
I freeze for a split second.
I know who it is.
I don’t have to look.
But I look anyway.
My father.
My jaw clenches.
I answer.
“I told you we’d talk later.” My voice is low. Controlled.
”Not when you’re doing stupid things like that.” comes the immediate response. Sharp. No detours.
I close my eyes for a second.
Inhale.
Exhale.
”I’m not doing anything stupid.” I say calmly.
“Yes.” he interrupts. “You left. You left the pack. You entered someone else’s territory without permission. And for what?”
”For him, father.”
Silence.
Then… a short laugh.
Cold.
”A Beta, Cedric?
!”
My eyes snap open.
“No,” I say, more firmly.
“For him.”
His voice hardens.
“You’re acting like a teenager who’s found his first obsession, not like an Alpha.
”
That hits home.
Direct.
But I’m not showing it.
“I said I’m taking care of it.
”
“You’re not taking care of anything,” he replies immediately.
“You’re embarrassing yourself. In front of other packs.
In front of me.”
My hand tightens on the phone.
Harder.
“I don’t care.”
“You should.” His voice drops.
It becomes more dangerous. “Because that name you’re carrying isn’t just yours.
”
I tense my shoulders.
“Then take it back.”
Silence.
Heavy.
Oppressive.
“Do you have any idea what you’re saying?” he asks softly.
"Yes."
"You're giving up everything. For what? For someone who's not even sure they want your child?"
Where...?
He's known for so long...and I..?
This...This is too much.
"Be careful.
" I say through my teeth.
"No." He replies immediately.
"You be careful. Because right now you don't look like an Alpha.
You look like someone who's losing control.
"
My breathing gets heavier.
Control.
That's exactly what it's about.
"I'm not losing anything.
"
"Yes." Pause. "You're losing your position.
You're losing your respect. And if you keep going.
.. you're going to lose yourself too. Even the baby.
"
Silence.
This time... I don't answer right away.
Because a part of me... hears him.
But it doesn't matter.
"No.
" I finally say. My voice is lower now. Colder.
"I know exactly what I'm doing."
"Then tell me.
" His voice becomes authoritative again.
"Are you coming back now or not?"
I look at the door.
My hand is still on the doorknob.
Beyond her.
..Two days.
Idris.
The child.
All.
"No. Wait 2 days, father, and then I'll come.
With him."
Pause.
Then... complete silence.
When he speaks again, his voice is different.
It's not just authority anymore.
It's.
.. disappointment.
"As you say.
But don't expect your own people to be empathetic to you anymore when their Alpha isn't even in the pack"
I swallow hard.
But I don't back down.
"Then I'm gone. "
And I hang up.
Without waiting any longer.
Without listening any longer.
The phone stays in my hand for a second.
Two.
Three.
Then I put it in my pocket.
I take a deep breath.
Everything has changed.
It's not just about taking it anymore.
It's not just about proving something anymore.
It's about… tearing everything down.
And building from scratch.
I push the door open and walk out.
My steps are no longer just calculated.
They're determined.
Two days.
And I have nothing left to lose.