Chapter 20
RAFE
Istudied Zach, refusing to give an answer yet.
I wanted to see him worry, to have him question whether his cock was really magic enough to make me willing to do whatever he wanted.
It was dangerous as fuck to agree to work with him.
I should bring Dante and Lorenzo in and let them help me, but I didn’t want to do that.
I wanted to do something without them. If I asked them to help, they’d take over. I’d no longer be the one in charge.
Like you weren’t the one in charge when Zach had you on the counter.
That was different. That was just sex. Work was different. At the casino, I was in charge, not my brothers, and I wanted to keep it that way. If Zach helped me, how much further under his spell would I be?
I’d be fine. I could fuck him, then send him away when I was done with him. Ivanov would be dead. I’d be a hero, and while I worked toward my goal, I’d have a hot man in my bed. It was a win-win. By the time we were done, I’d be ready to release him.
I moved toward Zach, not yet ready to let him think he’d won. When I was close enough to touch him, his eyes met mine. Damn, I loved the way he looked at me like a hungry predator.
That’s what he was, and I’d invited him right in. I was too foolish to send him away, but I was going to play with him. “How badly do you want this deal?”
“Rafe, you need help. I can give it to you.”
“What else can you give me?”
“Mind-blowing orgasms.”
I smiled. “Get on your knees.” He raised his brows. “You want this deal, prove it.”
“I’m not playing this game.”
“I think you will. I think you need me enough to do whatever is necessary to get me to work with you.”
“Fuck, Rafe, I—”
“Kneel, Griffin.”
He glared at me. “You know that’s not my name, and I don’t do that.”
“I’ll call you whatever I want, and you’re going to learn to do it now.” I’d given him so much, been so vulnerable in front of him, I had to regain some of that power now.
He held my gaze as he slowly sank to the floor. Without me having to order him, he pulled my sweats down and wrapped a hand around my cock. A few strokes were all I needed to be hard as steel. Fuck, he was everything I wanted.
“Have you ever sucked off a man?” He shook his head, and I smiled. “Good. I like being your first. Go on, take my cock in your mouth.” I loved being fucked, but I wanted a man who’d give me pleasure however I wanted it.
He gripped my cock tighter and swiped his tongue over the tip, groaning as he swallowed down a drop of precum.
Fuck, I might not last more than a few minutes, and I’d just come as he fucked me on the counter. I wasn’t going to survive this man.
He ran his tongue along the underside and smiled up at me, then took me deeper than I expected. When he pulled his lips along my length, sucking hard, I couldn’t hold back a gasp.
Had he practiced, or was it a God-given talent? There was nothing clumsy or unsure about the way he pleasured me, pumping the base of my cock as he bobbed his head along the length, using his tongue and a slight scrape of teeth, just enough to make me tense. Holy shit!
I wished I could lean on something. My knees were already wobbly.
I slid my fingers into Zach’s hair and gripped the side of his face.
“More.” I thrust deeper, and he took it.
I could see the anger in his eyes when he looked up at me, but he was willing to pay the price.
To let me fuck his mouth. To let me damage him if I wanted to.
Suddenly, I didn’t. I wanted… fuck. I wanted to haul him to his feet and kiss him and then take him to my bedroom, get on my hands and knees, and have him fuck me again. I pushed him away and stepped back. “That’s enough.”
He sat back on his heels and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. “What the fuck, Rafe?”
“You should go.”
“Now? With you…” He gestured toward my dick, which was still very into the idea of fucking his face and coming down his hot, tight throat. But my mind was spinning, and my heart was… nothing. My heart wasn’t involved. It couldn’t be, though the way it was pounding told a different story.
“I’m tired.”
“Right.”
“Come to my office tomorrow. We’ll find the fucker who’s working for Ivanov. Together.”
Zach frowned. “Are you all right?”
I pulled up my pants, willing my cock to stop begging me to change my mind. “No, and neither are you. Now, go.”
“I’m not sure what this game is.”
“I wanted to see if you’d do it. You did.”
“And you loved it.”
I shrugged. “Sure, it was okay.”
“Fuck off.” He ran his hands through his hair and looked around for his jacket. “I’ll have to call an Uber. You seem to be all out of functioning vehicles.”
Why hadn’t I thought of that? I grabbed my phone and sent a text.
“Your ride will be here in about thirty seconds.”
“You think I’m getting in the car with one of your mafia goons?”
“He’s a very nice man when he isn’t killing people. He’ll take you home.” I needed to know Zach was safe, even if I couldn’t be around him any longer without melting down.
He narrowed his eyes. “I’m supposed to trust you.”
“I won’t hurt you. I give you my word on that.”
He was silent for a moment as he studied me, and then he dipped his chin in acknowledgment. “I won’t hurt you either. Unless you ask for it.”
I pointed toward the door, and he laughed as he walked out.
I watched Zach get into the black sedan that came to pick him up. When he was out of sight, I rested my head against the window and tried to take deep breaths so I could slow the pounding of my heart.
It had been a hell of a night. I’d been held at knifepoint by a cocaine-addled psycho, sucked off a federal agent, run right toward an exploding car, then been fucked out of my mind. No wonder I’d freaked out when I got Zach on his knees.
He came after you. He followed Andretti to protect you and killed him without hesitation. He stole a car to chase after me. Obviously, he wasn’t interested in following any government rules.
Or he’s black ops like you first thought, and he’s just doing his job.
No, he didn’t have to touch me like that to do his fucking job. He might want information from me, but when he was on his knees, when he spread me out on the counter, that was real. It had to be.
Fuck. What if I was wrong? This whole situation was insane.
What if Remington saw the security footage from the warehouse?
He’d see Zach hot-wiring the car. He’d see him take off after me.
It wouldn’t take any effort to put together that he was the man I’d been with, the one I insisted was safe.
He’d investigate, pick everything apart, and he’d never trust me again if he didn’t literally murder me.
Maybe I could tell him I let a friend borrow the car, and I couldn’t find the key. No, that sounded stupid as hell, and why was the friend chasing me?
It all sounded like shit I’d done when I was eighteen, but I wasn’t that reckless now. I couldn’t be. Yet I’d invited Zach into my house, knowing what he was.
Maybe I could go back to the warehouse and destroy the footage. Except I was sure there was a backup. I’d have to hope for the best.
I pushed away from the window, walked into the kitchen, poured myself an extra-large whiskey, and drank about half of it in one go.
I was going to need the whole bottle to stop thinking about how I’d lost my mind. A government agent? A fucking government agent. Could it get any worse? It didn’t matter what agency he was with; he could ruin everything. Including me in the best way.
And fuck if I didn’t want more right that second.
How was I going to keep his identity from my family? Remington eventually found out everything, and Dante already knew I’d caught Zach cheating at the casino. If he knew everything, he’d rat me out to Lorenzo, and they’d wreck everything I was working toward.
Dante had called several times while I’d been busy letting Zach fuck my brains out, then freaking out about how damn good it had been.
I needed to call him back before he did something drastic like show up here again, but what the fuck was I going to say?
He knew X had cleared the guy, but that wouldn’t be enough if he thought Zach was using me.
He wasn’t. I was using him. Right? Or maybe we were using each other. Either way, I was fine. I didn’t need Dante or Lorenzo or anyone else coming to the rescue.
X knew Zach was a fed, didn’t he? He had too. No matter what kind of secretive, deep-off-the-grid, black ops maneuvers Zach was involved in, X would know. Was that why he’d told me to stay away?
Yeah, no shit.
My own brain was laughing at me. I was a fucking idiot.
I took another drink, letting the alcohol burn its way down my throat. I wished it could scorch away the memory of what I’d done with Zach. Or, better yet, sear away my desire for him altogether. Why the fuck was it the best sex I’d ever had?
I enjoyed sucking guys off when it felt right, but I’d never wanted to fucking worship a guy’s cock like that. If he’d kept fucking my mouth, I might’ve come hands-free from his cock in my throat.
Who does things like that?
But now I had to face reality, one of my least favorite things.
Remington had given me an assignment, and I’d told him I could handle it.
I wished I’d actually been as confident as I tried to sound.
I resented that Ivanov had sent someone into the casino, thinking he could infiltrate us there because I was the weakest link.
I’d been determined to prove I was better than that, but I’d just fucked a man who could rain hell down on my family.
We’d beat him if we had to, but we didn’t need that fight.
Xavier told you he was safe.
He also told me to stay away from him.
If he thought Zach was going to turn your family over to the feds, he would’ve had him eliminated before you could blink.
That was true, but when I told Remington I could handle this, I’d assumed I’d have the family’s resources at my disposal. Now I was on my own unless I wanted to explain my arrangement with Zach.
I could tell Dante. He wouldn’t run to Remington, but I was the baby brother screwup. I was already known for putting the needs of my dick before everything else. I refused to solidify that reputation any more.
I was going to have to do this with only Zach’s help.
I hoped he had better hacking skills than I did.
I could charm anyone in person, but stalking people online?
Not my thing. And I was a hell of a lot better going on instinct than analyzing data.
I might have to learn some things really fucking fast because I was not about to admit what I’d agreed to, not even to Dante.
You really think you can keep a secret from your brothers? They expect you to tell them everything.
Not everything. They never wanted any details about my hookups, no matter how good they were. And Zach was damn good.
Fucking bastard with his magic cock. How did he know I wanted to be on my knees? Why did I freak out? I could have kept him here, taken him to bed, and found out what else he wanted to do to me.
Maybe you didn’t do that because you actually have an ounce of sense.
Maybe Zach wouldn’t show up at the casino, then I might tell Dante everything. Except I couldn’t stand to see my brother disappointed in me again.
I finished the rest of my drink and almost poured another one, but as much as I wanted to be wasted, I needed to start looking through my employees’ files, and I might as well start now.
I sure as hell wasn’t going to sleep. I was buzzing after all of the adrenaline that had been pumped into my body tonight.
Some men liked to sleep after sex, but I was always charged up, needing more or something else to divert my attention.
Getting a serious pleasure thrill only made me hungrier for more.
I started a pot of coffee and went to get my laptop.
The first thing I needed to do was think through everyone who’d been hired or started gambling regularly over the last six months.
Jesus, that was going to take forever. As much as I kept my eye on things, I didn’t know every person who came in and out of there, especially the ones who played low stakes.
At least I did have a tendency to notice people whose behavior was unusual and keep track of them. My brothers never realized how observant I was. I pored through files and security footage until I had a list of people I needed to investigate further.
By that point, the sun was fully up, and I’d had way too much coffee.
My head was buzzing, and my body was shaking.
I changed quickly and went for a long run, pushing myself hard, wishing I could run all the insanity out of me.
What if taking care of myself could make me into the kind of responsible adult my family wanted? Nah, that wasn’t likely to happen.
When I got home, I stretched, then got into the shower.
As the water poured over me, I couldn’t make myself think about the investigation.
All I thought about was whether I could fuck Zach in my office later today.
If he showed up. He might have decided I was too much of a fucking mess, and he could track Ivanov another way.
A vision of him on his knees in front of me flashed through my mind. He was going to show up. He wanted to find the quickest path to take down Ivanov, and he’d use me any way he could to do it.
I could use the help, so I’d take it, and I’d take Zach to bed too, as many times as I could get away with it. Because he was fucking hot, he knew exactly what I wanted, and I loved the danger. I used to take risks every day. I was doing better, but I deserved a treat once in a while.