Chapter 42
The haunted house pressed around me, completely stale and musty. Little dust particles drifted in the pale moonlight as it spilled through the broken windows. I leaned against the crumbling doorway, my muscles coiled beneath the leather, and every nerve alive like a live wire fraying my senses.
Every breath I had was caught in anticipation. I had been waiting for hours, and every fucking heartbeat without seeing his dirty blond hair appear stretched into eternity.
Shiloh.
My fucking Shiloh.
The thought alone set fire to my chest, and every vein hummed with hunger, obsession, and so much need.
I loved him.
Fuck me, I actually loved him. I was going to tell him I would do it. I would give up the darkness. If killing rabbits and chasing boars was how to keep him in my life, then so be it. My resolve felt right. The bad boy turned semi-killer. Absolutely dick whipped. I wasn’t gay, but apparently…
I am for him.
I heard his ragged breath before I saw him, felt the shift of the stagnant air, and the faint creak of floorboards under his careful footsteps.
He was cautious.
His body taut, his eyes scanning, trying to anticipate where I was, and when he’d find me.
His gaze flicked toward me, then away, wary but unmistakably drawn in. My lips curved beneath my mask, my familiar outfit bringing back such deliciously tainted memories. Every motion told me he was playing our game again.
“You look tense, Sunshine,” I murmured, stepping closer to him, letting my fingers brush the walls as I got to where he stood. “Something on your mind?”
My fingertips trailed over his body, noticing his fists were busted.
“My, my, Sunshine. Who pissed you off?” I chuckled, bringing his fist to my lips and letting my tongue glide over the casted wound. “It would appear enough actually to punch the shit out of them?”
“I…I’m not here for this,” he said, his stubbled jaw tight, and his chest rising and falling faster with my touch.
“Oh, feeling secretive, Baby? I thought you came here exactly for this,” I laughed low in my throat.
Dangerously, I let my hand slide to his hip and slip into his waistband.
“You came here for me, Shiloh. You’ve never been able to resist what I fucking do to you.
But tonight, I can see it. You’re holding something back. ”
He shifted under my darkened gaze, and his body trembled as I circled him, trying to figure out what was different in his stance. That hesitation, the push-and-pull of want and restraint that always set fire through me, was muted somehow.
I stepped closer, my hand moving over the tight lines of his chest, brushing the lean curve of his muscles, and leaning down to let my teeth graze lightly along his jaw.
“I-I can’t, Carrington…s-stop. We need to t-talk,” he stammered, his voice trembling.
“Mmm, you want to fight me, don’t you?” I whispered, my voice lowered to a rough rasp, my teeth grazing his jaw again. “Something has changed, my sweet Sunshine. Punching people and trying to resist me now. So intriguing, Baby Boy. But futile nonetheless.”
He gasped in my mouth, pulling away from my forced kisses, caught in the power of my words. His breath hitched on the syllables of my name. “Carrington…I…S—”
“Stop?” I growled, pulling him flush to me, letting the wall trap him against me, just like that first night. “So cute, you’ve found your words. Let’s listen to how you’ll scream them.”
“I…I came to talk. Just talk, Carrington.”
“Oh, I know,” I said, my voice sharp as my cock, and just as dangerous.
My lips brushed his temple, my teeth grazing lightly, while my hand threaded through his lazy blond waves.
“You came to me. To talk. You know I don’t give anything for free, Shiloh. Why don’t you earn my silence to listen? Fill up my mouth to keep me quiet.”
His bright blue eyes flared, while his body shook, each and every muscle coiled beneath my fingertips. The resistance I fucking loved. The deadpanned hesitation was melting, leaving only a smoldering fire in its wake.
He shivered again and pressed closer, his hands moving, hesitant at first, then with more certainty, roaming over my chest, my shoulders, and my back.
I groaned low in my throat, letting the friction ignite the room around us.
His soft, familiar moans mingled with mine, echoing off the broken walls as he explored my body.
“Carrington, fuck me, why are you so hard to—”
“I am always hard for you, Sunshine,” I growled, my hand gripping his and pressing it firmly on my aching cock. “I can’t help myself. I love you.”
He gasped, letting my lips brush against his. “Carrington…I…”
I silenced him with a hard, claiming kiss. My hands tangled into his hair, pulling him impossibly close to me. All the heat was pooling low into my dick, and I hissed at my piercing pressed against the leather.
The back-and-forth of his mind was always there, the shadow of my fucking sister, and his determination to deny himself the desire he craved. But like every other time, his body betrayed him. His dick pressed into my upper thigh, and I moaned, grinding my own against his.
We collided onto the floor, his ragged, desperate moans enveloping me like a blanket.
“Care Bear—fuck…you make me crazy. I can’t—”
He ripped the leather from my body, taking control, demanding from me what I was all too willing to give him.
The friction of skin on skin was pure fire.
His dick was so hot against my flesh, his foreskin wrapped around mine, covering my piercing and making us both groan at the intensity of the sensitive nerves.
Fuck me. He would be my undoing.
“Fuck me, Shiloh. Let me feel what that fucking cock can do, Baby Boy.”
I was as surprised by my words as he seemed to be. He started to speak, breaking this moment and ruining everything that was happening.
“Care Bear…I…”
I shook my head, getting myself into a vulnerable position, the feeling so fucking foreign, I couldn’t begin to understand why anyone did this willingly. I needed control. I needed to be the leader of this, but I had to trust him. I had to show him with actions before my words brought change.
My teeth clenched along with my asshole, my lips still tingling from his kisses.
Every tremor and every gasp from him slid through me, a fucking declaration of need.
His hands clutched at my hips, pressing his cock onto my ass cheek, pulling me closer to him, his breathing shook while he tried to join himself with me.
His desperate attempts at denying me continued, even now.
“God, Shiloh…” I murmured against the floor. “I fucking need this. Just shut the fuck up and do it. Please. I want it to be you.”
“I…Carrington, why now? Why do you fucking do this to me now? I—” His voice broke, and I could hear the tears before I felt them hit my back.
His hands weakly held onto my hips. Every tremor of his strong body, every ragged breath, and every gasp told me he wanted this. He craved taking me like this as much as I did, even as his heart strained against it.
I pressed into him harder, his cock pushed on my tight hole, eliciting a gasp from me.
He moaned, and despite the pain, I did it again.
I rocked my body back and forth slowly, my dick swinging below me like a fucking pendulum.
And it weirdly made me think of how time stood still with him at my side.
“I fucking love you,” I groaned, breathless, actually fearful of this. For the first time in my life, I had my back turned to someone. They could kill me, hurt me…or leave me.
He sighed deeply and sniffled behind me.
“It’s okay, Carrington. I won’t make it hurt. I just…I want you to feel good.”
Before I could answer him, his mouth, those fucking tantalizing lips, were right on my balls, licking and sucking, so close to my ass I was shaking. His fingers explore my hole, wet and slippery from his spit.
“Get ready, Baby,” he whispered, and then I felt his hot saliva drip onto my asshole.
“Oh…fuuuuuck. You are teasing…just do it. I’m going to fucking—I can’t take the anticipation.”
He laughed at me, slipping his finger into the entrance and pushing lightly. My teeth were going to crack at this slow torture. At least I killed quickly.
Fuck.
This was a new form of hell. Heaven was so close, yet teetering on the edge.
Like my sanity.
His lips brushed every curve of my body, his hands mapping, claiming, tasting, and fucking marking, while his finger pushed deeper inside me.
I arched into him, my lips meeting his again, biting, while I wrapped my arms around his neck like he was the only solid fucking thing I had.
I felt the ever-present conflict in him, the pull toward his light, and the need for my darkness. It made every gasp sharper behind me, every shiver hotter against my skin.
His finger became thicker. No, it was two fingers pressing inside me, curling and hitting that ungodly spot that made me feel like a bitch as it curled my toes when he hit it. I could see his thick cock between my thighs, and I gulped, realizing just what I had requested.
“Let me hear you scream, Carrington. Let me hear how much you want my cock inside your tight fucking ass. Are you brave enough to admit it, Big Boy? Can you take it?”
I laughed, my body shaking when he pressed that thickness right onto the small hole he had made inside me.
Ow. Okay. I could do this.
“Fucking hurt me, Shiloh. Make me bleed. I can’t fucking take it. So make me. Make me take your thick fucking cock.”
He whimpered, and I couldn’t fucking breathe.
Holy fuck. Holy fuck. Holy fuck.
“Sun—shine—ah—fuck me, baby.”
“That’s it, Care Bear. Breathe through it. You’ve got this. Breathe. Nice and slow. Feel every inch of me inside you. I…I have to give you this.”
I ignored the hesitation in his voice and pushed back a little further, his thick head slipping past my borders, and a fullness making me pant as I kept sliding back.
God, this made me feel like I needed to shit. How is this pleasurable for anyone?
“Push past it, Carrington. Get deeper, then you’ll feel it.”
“How the fuck will I know when—oh fuck!”
A burst of euphoria hit me when his dick pushed in further, nearly fully inside now. A combination of pain and pleasure whirling inside me like a fucking tornado. My Sunshine was inside my fucking ass, taking me, taking control of everything I was afraid to give.
“I love you. God, fuck me, I love you.”
It was a chant I couldn’t stop as I came on the ground. Fuck, I was seeing stars. He was my sun, my moon, and my stars. My whole goddamn universe.
And I was his.
“Carrington, I fucking love you! Fuck I can’t help myself. I love you, too.”
His come shot into me like a firehose, the intensity of the pulsing making me come again. I couldn’t keep myself upright. I physically fell onto the floor of the haunted house, and he followed on top of me, his dick still lodged so damn deep into my ass.
“Stop making me fall for you, asshole,” I teased, while Shiloh tried to catch his breath. The atmosphere suddenly felt off, and my back was coated in cold wetness.
Tears.
From Shiloh.
Why was he crying?
I adjusted myself, pulling away from the love of my life, to sit so I could look at him as I tried to understand why he was crying harder than I had ever seen him before. His father hadn’t even brought on this kind of pain. Nothing had.
“Shiloh. What’s wrong?” I said, concern lacing my tone, as I scooted forward to wrap him in my arms. “Baby, talk to me. What happened? Did I hurt you?”
I looked over his body as he continued to break in my arms.
“I-I’m a fucking monster. I-I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t ha-have taken that from you. I shouldn’t ha-have even come he-here.”
I searched his eyes, gripping his chin in my hand, forcing him to look at me.
Broken.
Destroyed.
He looked like his heart was shattering, and in turn, mine squeezed.
“Sunshine…what…what did you do?”
I didn’t want to hear the words. I didn’t want to hear the reason why he came to me tonight. It wasn’t to tell me this was okay. To tell me I needed to behave and stop leaving dead bodies in the woods. This was darker. His light was…gone.
“I chose her, Carrington. I had to choose your sister. There’s no future with us. I’m getting married to Xanthy. We ca-can’t be together. We will only drown each other.”
My entire life, I had held onto a sliver of humanity, a small light in the dark that allowed me to control my actions, my movements. But with his confession…
I didn’t feel warmth. I didn’t feel light or love.
I felt nothing.
I was completely numb.