31. Knowing
31
KNOWING
Sarah
I woke up with my head swimming, feeling like I’d slept in a swamp. My mouth was dry, and I was in an unfamiliar bed.
Groaning, I looked to my left and saw a glass of water and two Advil, placed there for my benefit. Then I groaned even more when I saw what was hanging on the closet. The once fabulous dress. Looking like it had been taken on a ride through hell by a motorcycle gang. The red wine stains, dirt, and bile told the story of how it - and I - had got there. But it didn’t say exactly how.
I pulled myself up uneasily, a sharp pain throbbing behind my eyes, and heard the door creak open.
“Good morning. Well… Almost,” he said as he casually walked in. Oh God. I was at Hayden’s.
I could smell the rich aroma of coffee from the mug that his hands were wrapped around. He held it out to me with a smile and I took it suspiciously, desperately trying to recall the night before, and wondering exactly what I was doing there in that bed. As I took the coffee, I noticed with a flutter of delight my grandma’s ring on my hand.
“Hayden, did we…” I uttered through my dry throat.
He gulped back at me.
Oh God, had we?
“I put you to bed. That’s all.” He replied.
I squinted at him, even more suspiciously this time, to make sure he was telling the truth.
“What are these?” I pulled at the huge USA Hockey t-shirt that covered me like a blanket and the enormous tartan print pants.
“Well, I couldn’t let you sleep in that.” His eyes led mine once more toward the dress, now hanging like a tattered mess.
“So. You… Undressed me?”
Hayden coughed and looked away awkwardly. “I tried my best not to look too much.”
“Thank you,” I replied shyly.
Hayden
It was true. I had tried not to. Tried to keep my eyes from that warm, inviting skin, those soft thighs, the divine stretch of her back. In that moment, my only intention was to help her, though. I loved that I could do that for her.
I’d never got my answer, but at least I was with her. Something about that felt so right. I knew deep down that this was either going to be the start of something or the end. I was in turmoil about which one it would be.
I’d played all my cards. All that was left was for her to show her hand, and then we would know. Just for once, can this not be temporary but something real ?
Sarah
“So, you wanna grab a shower?” He asked me.
“Do I need one?”
Hayden sniffed the air theatrically and laughed, before I took a sniff at myself.
“Oof. Okay. Point taken.”
I paused, still wondering, before I asked him, “Did you mean it?”
He raised his eyebrows back at me.
“I mean, last night. The things you said.”
Hayden’s demeanor turned shy and nervous. Those beautiful dark eyes, like wide mystical moons, looked back at me, full of mystery, and he nodded bashfully.
“You mean, when I was down on one knee holding up a ring with everyone watching?”
I smiled back at him. It had been quite the look.
“Sarah… I meant every word.”
Now, it was my turn to gulp. My eyes fell away from his and traveled down across his strong frame. While I was thankful he hadn’t taken advantage of me, a swelling part of me was disappointed. I felt desire rise and prickle my skin, and he saw it in me as our eyes met. That strange feeling between us rippled up again. A thousand words couldn’t have said what our eyes did to each other.
I climbed clumsily out of the bed and stood before him, us both admiring each other, our skin wanting to feel the touch of the others. The attraction was wild and undeniable.
“A shower sounds like a good idea,” I said softly.
I took his hand and pulled him behind me, leading Hayden with me into the bathroom.
I turned to him and rested my ass against the sink as he came in closer, his breath short and anxious, matching my own. His eyes were sparkling, showing his every desire. He was only waiting for my permission.
“This time you can look while you undress me.”
Hayden didn’t hesitate. Those huge hands, full of strength and aggression, were as soft and gentle as snow as they slipped to my sides and pulled up my oversized shirt, revealing my soft belly, then the tender curves of my breasts that were held within the black bra I couldn’t wait to remove.
Slowly and deliberately, Hayden undressed me, savoring each piece of enticing flesh that made his heart thump. I turned for him and let him unfasten my bra, hearing his sharp breath as his fingers traced along my back, his touch on my skin making me quiver and sharpen with desire.
I reached behind me and took his hands in mine, pushing them down to the waistband of my giant-sized pants and then releasing them, letting him have the satisfaction and indulgence of slipping them down over my hips and my ass.
My skin felt wild and beautiful as he rolled the brushed cotton down my thighs, stepping out as they reached each ankle. His hand wrapped around each of my ankles, as if he was mystified by them, like they were a new and wonderful discovery delivered by the Gods. My own eyes closed in bliss as his palms and outstretched fingers slid slowly back up the meat of my legs, finding their way to the top of my panties. We both gasped in thrilled excitement as he pulled them from my hips and down my body, until they lay around my feet.
His frame dwarfed me again as I sensed him rise behind me. One perfectly sculpted arm reached over me and turned the handle that brought water gushing out from the showerhead. His hands held my arms as we waited for the steam to come and join us, then he held out his hand as if he were asking me to dance. My hand looked tiny as I placed it on top of his outstretched palm and he led my naked body forward into the shower.
I turned to him, letting him see me, wanting his eyes, his hands, his lips, all of him, to have all of me. His eyes traveled hungrily along my naked body, hardly able to blink in case he might miss a second of what was before him.
Unable to resist, I reached out and pulled at where his white t-shirt hung over his belt, Hayden lifting his strong arms for me as I lifted the shirt over his head.
The vision of that ripple of muscles made me softly bite my lip with wild desire. My fingers were almost scared to reach out and touch his chest, as if it couldn’t be real and would disappear as soon as I tested it. My fingertips found him with reverence, slowly searching out the hard muscle and soft excitement of his body with fascination. So much to discover, and I’d only just started, as I traced a white stretch of scar tissue across his ribcage and delicately touched it.
Hayden stepped forward, forcing me to move a pace backward into the shower. The hot water gushing over us, the steam engulfing our bodies. I turned my back to him as he reached for the shower gel, lathering it decisively between his hands before his thick fingers met my shoulders, massaging them as they responded and softened with sheer bliss.
His hands ran upward through my hair, those thick fingers finding their way to tenderly massage my scalp and run deep into my hair. As he reached past me for the bath sponge, I was beyond eager for him to take that soapy sponge all over me. All my fantasies were suddenly coming to life, as if he knew exactly what I wanted. I was completely given over to him as he slipped those bubbles over my skin, exploring every part of my body, making me clean for him in the wild heat of the steam that enveloped us.
I felt him leave me and turned to see Hayden holding out a towel for me. Stepped out, I let him cover me in it, patting down and drying the same skin that he had been blissfully teasing and caressing only moments ago.
Turning to Hayden, my hands rose and rested on his shoulders, and the look in our eyes said everything. Then, in one swift and divine movement, he scooped me up off my feet and carried me effortlessly back into the bedroom.
Throwing me down onto the bed, I felt wild for him.
“Hayden, I think you might make me crazy.”
He turned to me with a wicked glint in his eye and ran his thick thumb over my lips.
“Hush now. Those lips aren’t for words. Right now they’ve got other work to do.”
I giggled at his brazen confidence, but I wasn’t about to argue either as I rolled on top of his huge frame and let my mouth run kisses down his chest, heading lower and lower under the rich cotton sheets.
Sarah
I wanted to stay in that blissful state forever, wrapped up gleefully in the sheets with each other, exploring every sweet indulgence we could imagine. If only I could.
“I have to go.”
“I know.” He sighed back, as if just the thought of it made him ache.
“I really don’t want to, though.”
“Let me drive you.”
“Sure, I’d like that. ”
Outside, we sat in his car for a beautiful moment, both of us smiling shyly. Then our lips found each other again, and it all faded away. He wasn’t a hockey player or a fantasy anymore. He was just Hayden and, right now, he was mine. For the first time since I came back to Merryville, I wasn’t a teacher or a confused mess. I was his. And that mountain of a man had let his heart soften until it had melted into mine.
Love had leveled us. Now, it might just heal us.