Chapter 39 Jack
I ’VE NEVER CALLED MYSELF A paranoid or self-conscious person, but people are definitely avoiding me today.
Neighbors who would normally stop and make polite conversation as I pass them on Elf’s walk, Flo when I’m in the line for coffee at Bliss, Arthur when I walk past anything that looks slightly crooked.
Today I’d be able to hear the crickets if it weren’t winter and they were around.
Total radio silence.
At first I like it; my whole schedule moves faster without the constant distractions. I’m grateful, given I’m already trying to distract myself from reliving last night in my head. But by late afternoon, I’m starting to feel unsettled. Nobody interrupted me in the workshop with a request.
The weirdest part was nobody stopped to pet Elf, and he’s holding me personally responsible in the form of ignoring me too. When I tell him it’s time to go to the town meeting he doesn’t move an inch.
“I’ll leave you here,” I say out loud, like he’s a child I’m trying to make behave in the grocery store. “I’m going without you. Watch…”
I open the front door but he still doesn’t move. I feel like I’m losing it wondering if my dog is annoyed at me that Clara isn’t here anymore. He’s smart, but I’m pretty sure he isn’t listen to an argument and hold a grudge smart. “Last chance, Elfy…”
Even town feels different today. The gray skies make the snow-covered ground feel dull; the tree lights are dim. The brightness has been turned down, me included.
The town hall is already full when I arrive, with people standing around talking, but nobody looks at me when I walk in.
I hover near the back, ready to take a seat somewhere I’ll have an easy exit.
Meetings are usually quick in December, but I go anyway because if I’m not here to speak for myself, I’ll end up with a to-do list longer than me.
I’m about to sit down when I hear, “You!” yelled from across the room. I look for the source of the noise, only to find Dove heading straight for me. “You pigheaded, stubborn man! I could kill you, Jack Kelly.”
Her finger stabs me right in the chest and Luke pulls her back by her waist. “What the hell is wrong with you?”
Dove’s face twists into something incredulous. “What’s wrong with me? What’s wrong with you!”
Flo appears beside her, brushing off Luke and putting her arm across Dove’s shoulder. He mouths “Sorry” at me from behind Dove and disappears into the meeting crowd. I can’t blame him, I’d do the same. Flo sighs. “Dove Pierce, stop shouting in public.”
“But he—”
“I know what he did,” Flo says. “But you need to lower your voice.” Flo’s volume and sharpness immediately rise when she adds, “And I’d like to know what on God’s green earth you thought you were doing when you sent that wonderful woman back home in tears.”
I guess I don’t need to worry about being paranoid anymore.
Dove takes a deep breath, her chest growing and shrinking as she centers herself.
“A truck arrived here this afternoon and took back the boxes of toys Clara donated.” The toy drive going ahead without Davenport toys is what I asked for, so I can’t work out why I feel so shitty. “I don’t know why you look so conflicted when it’s what you wanted.”
I’ve known Dove Pierce her whole life, and she’s never talked to me like this. I think the only time I ever saw her this angry was at Luke when she found out she was pregnant.
“We’ll replace the toys,” I say confidently. I’ll find a way. I’ll email everyone the way Clara has. I’ll put in the work.
Flo squeezes Dove’s shoulder and if I weren’t in the firing line I’d be confused about them uniting to shout me down.
“Clara has already replaced them, Jack. We expect them to arrive over the weekend. She apologized for using her own money to buy them, she said she hoped we wouldn’t think she was throwing money at us.
She just couldn’t see a way to resolve the hurt she’d caused while also not letting down the children. ”
“And now I have to f—freaking catalog them again,” Dove says, huffing. “When there wasn’t anything wrong in the first place! It’s not like we gave them money! We got them for free!”
There’s a tight squeezing in my chest, turning and folding in on itself. “She was here for a promotion.”
“We know,” they say in unison. “It was never a secret, Jack.”
“I told her to quit her job,” Maggie says, filling the spot beside Flo. “Her dad sounds like a terrible man. I didn’t trust he’d give her the promotion even if she did turn things around here.”
Dove nods. “I told her to quit, too, she’s too nice to work there. I told her to start her own family legacy. She can make it whatever she wants it to be. It doesn’t need to be attached to them.”
“Well, I told her she should be sipping margaritas in Saint-Tropez and not worry about work because it would only age her prematurely,” Flo adds. “Her father favors her brother anyway. Why get wrinkles and be second best?”
They continue to share their thoughts and opinions. Meanwhile I feel like the rug has been pulled out from beneath my feet. I want to ask how the fuck they all know but I don’t, I know the answer because Clara yelled it at me last night.
I told her not to talk to me about her job or her family.
“The point still stands. She came here with ulterior motives. It was more than her just wanting to do right by us. She was out for herself, and I let her fool me.”
Flo nods but I know she’s not agreeing with me. I’m about to get it. “Did she beg you to convince me to delete the videos? Did she bring it up and pressure you? Want you to put out a public announcement saying you’ve forgiven Davenport?”
“No.”
“No, she didn’t,” Flo says flatly. “Because Clara Davenport isn’t and has never been the villain you’ve made her. And now she’s gone, likely never to return, probably believing that nothing she does is ever good enough for you.”
“That’s not true,” I argue. “I told her how much she deserves better.”
“You really don’t get it, do you?” Dove says, rolling her eyes. “I give up. You don’t deserve her anyway.”
“What did I miss?” Tommy appears behind me and I’ve never been more relieved to have backup.
Dove laughs. “Your best friend is a fucking asshole, how’s that for an update?”
She pushes past him, before Flo can yell at her for cursing, and disappears into one of the side rooms. I turn ninety degrees so I can see both him and Maggie and Flo.
“Great,” Tommy mutters, “so glad I hauled my ass over here for important town business.”
I side-eye him. “You’re not the one being yelled at.”
“What did you do? Where’s Clara?” he says, looking around for the familiar head of red hair.
He takes one look at Flo and Maggie, then looks at me knowingly.
“You’re such a fuckup sometimes, jeez. Ow!
I’m sorry for cursing, Ms. Flo, but he needs to hear it.
I knew you’d do this, Jack. Why have you always got to be punishing yourself?
Just be happy for once for God’s sake—ow! ”
When being pinched by Flo isn’t stopping him from telling me how it is, I guess I can take Tommy’s thoughts at face value. “I’m not punishing myself.”
“You are,” Tommy says softly. “It isn’t a new thing, you’ve been doing it since we were teenagers.
It feels like you’ve been extra hard on yourself ever since Davenport announced their copycat doll.
Like you didn’t even take a minute to be sad for yourself and your creation, you went headfirst into being angry for everyone, when we were sad for you and everything you’ve achieved. ”
Flo nods. “Couldn’t have said it better myself, Thomas. If it wasn’t them, it was going to be someone else. People try to steal magic all the time in commerce, but they can’t steal what only you can make.”
I don’t know what to say to the people whom I love so much who are really fucking angry at me right now. Thankfully, Arthur takes the stage and bangs the gavel he bought for himself from eBay.
I take a seat at the back of the room so I can run if I end up being a topic on the agenda. It’s one thing to listen to Dove and Flo lay into me, but I don’t think I can deal with the whole town.
“It’s a quick meeting today, folks. We’re going to start off with requests and submissions, move on to upcoming events and updates, and finish with good-news stories. First up is…” Arthur checks his list; his rectangular glasses almost fall off the end of his nose. “Donald.”
Excitement shoots through me as I reach for my phone when Donald stands up sporting his favorite Area 51 T-shirt.
It’s short-lived, replaced with an emptiness when I realize I was going to text Clara.
She spent her whole time here wanting to meet him.
He was so elusive that she started to believe she’d imagined him that first time she saw him with a net.
Arthur tells Donald that he won’t be putting in a request to remove the cell towers and Donald storms off.
“Tommy, you’re up next, unless you have the same request.”
Tommy gets onstage with his laptop and I sit up a little taller in my chair. What the hell is he doing there? “I’m all good with the cell towers, thanks,” he says, awkwardly connecting his laptop to the ancient projector system we have.
A presentation appears on the screen behind him. “I know you all probably know what I want to talk about, but I’m asking you to look at my request with fresh eyes. I have a presentation I’d like to share, then I can answer any questions at the end.”
The first slide is a picture of a sketch I did to demonstrate how an extension to his patio would look.
I don’t think I ever gave him a copy. He clicks to the next page, which outlines the benefits of profitability, public perception, and return visitors.
His slides are detailed and thorough and when he clicks the next slide to possible cons, he has proposed actions to make sure none of them impact the town.
“There’s something more I’d like to add on—a retractable roof and walls.
” He brings up pictures of other bars with outside patios; one has clear glass walls and roof, and what look like heaters.
“Fraser Falls is so beautiful people should be able to enjoy looking at it even when it’s too cold.
Being able to close off the patio will allow me to offer service to more customers through the winter. ”
He finishes up with some numbers and graphs and a slide that thanks everyone for listening.
I can’t believe Tommy has been planning this and didn’t tell me.
If I weren’t already sold on the idea, I would be now.
Arthur looks like he is still processing and is possibly a tiny bit skeptical judging from the crease that has now appeared in his brow.
“Can we talk after the meeting, Tommy? I have some questions but this all looks very promising.”
Tommy hasn’t looked this happy in forever. He unhooks his laptop and jumps down from the stage. “Sure. Thanks, everyone.”
Arthur checks his list. “Luke?”
Luke stands, looking as shocked as me at the performance his brother just put on.
“Not a lot from me. I’m getting a new website for the Christmas tree farm.
People will be able to select a visiting time so I can see trends and plan staff cover better.
It’ll help with traffic flow and I’m happy to share the information with other businesses.
Gonna introduce some email marketing and maybe try some targeted ads. Watch this space.”
He sits back down and Arthur moves through his list. Winnie tells everyone how busy they are and that their mailable flowers are doing great. Dove is next.
“Dove something to do with the Santa letters, I think.
Everything that’s happening over the next few weeks will raise our profile, bring visitors, and get them to spend their money. Just like Clara wanted.
I genuinely feel sick as Arthur starts on the good-news-story section.
Every single thing he mentions I can place on Clara’s closet wall.
Even the things she hasn’t taken credit for.
There’s no way Luke proactively organized himself a new website, and Tommy couldn’t have done a whole-ass presentation with a picture from my place without me knowing.
Is this what it’s going to be like? Feeling her touch on everything and everyone? People staring at me whenever she’s brought up in conversation? I’ve always said she’s a ghost haunting me and I think I’m about to find out how true that is.
I’m the guy who drove her away, so I guess it’s only what I deserve.
I don’t leave the meeting even though I want to; I stay until the end, even linger so I won’t have to walk back to Main with Flo.
Tommy comes bouncing down the aisle, almost sending his laptop soaring across the room.
He claps me on the back. “They said yes! They fucking said yes!” he whispers as loud as his hushed tone will allow.
He looks back at Arthur over his shoulder to make sure he didn’t hear him.
“Congrats, man. You did yourself proud up there.”
“We should celebrate!” he says, and I couldn’t be farther from his energy level if I tried. But he’s my best friend and frankly, a change of scenery sounds good. “Where should we go?”
“Somewhere not in Fraser Falls.”