Chapter 5
CHAPTER FIVE
L acie had found herself going outside via the guest bedroom patio a lot lately instead of the front door. Visits to town, walks along the beach, and enjoying the cool but pleasant weather. She would sometimes sit on the patio chair in the morning to read, where the winter sun landed and warmed her up. Except on Wednesday when she almost puked in the pot plant again, having forgotten to take the morning sickness medicine the night before. Then, when it was time to go out, she’d pick an orange along the way, toss one to Nathan who’d give a friendly wave, and make her way to the front of the house. They had enjoyed several interruptions in the last few days; snippets of conversation and laughter, but today, as she tossed the orange to him, she was mentally preoccupied and it landed a metre to his side.
‘Hey, I’m over here,’ he said, waving both arms across his body and out to the side as though he was flagging down a rescue helicopter.
Lacie laughed. ‘Sorry, must still be half asleep!’
He picked up the orange and smiled. ‘An orange a day keeps the doctor away.’ He peeled it and took a bite.
Hmm, not in her case. No orange would have any impact on her situation. Today was the appointment for the ultrasound, and the pregnancy would become real.
‘Have a good day, I’m out for a while.’ She waved.
‘Thanks, you too. If I don’t see you later, I hope tonight’s reunion dinner goes well and you guys enjoy the firepit.’
‘It looks awesome, Nathan, thank you.’ She took a quick look again at the circular display of pebbles around the firepit, the hem of mini bricks surrounding it, and the tree stump stools he had created. He’d also hung a large wrought-iron leaf design onto the dividing wall near the barbeque area, which sectioned off the yard from the neighbouring guest cottage her mother rented out to holiday goers. He’d lifted a new bench seat over to the area as well, so there’d be enough seating for everyone who was coming tonight.
She waved and smiled again as Nathan knelt down to continue weeding the flowerbeds, then made her way to the front where her mother’s car was waiting for her to use. She had told her she was going to Welston for a haircut at a recommended salon, and that she might catch up with one of her old school friends who lived there. She had booked the hairdresser mostly as a diversion for where she was really going, but did need a trim, so it wasn’t a complete waste of time, and the truth was she had tried to reach her friend but she was too busy with work. They had lost contact over the years and their visits when Lacie was in town had become less and less. Anyway, she would probably need some time to herself after the ultrasound appointment anyway.
Lacie got into her mother’s sedan, familiarised herself with things being on the opposite side, and, having drunk two glasses of water as advised, was already wishing she could use the bathroom. She clenched and drove out of the arced driveway for the thirty-minute trip to see her baby for the first time.
‘First pregnancy?’ the sonographer asked as she squirted cold gel on her lower abdomen.
Lacie nodded.
‘I’ll take a quick look first and get some basic measurements, then you can duck to the bathroom before we do the internal scan which will give us a better view of the pregnancy.’
‘Okay,’ she whispered. Doesn’t she mean view of the baby? Or maybe they didn’t like to use that word in case anything was wrong. Would something be wrong? ‘Um, I might close my eyes and look when you tell me to, is that okay?’ Lacie was suddenly overwhelmed with nerves.
‘Of course. I need to do the technical things first anyway and then I can show you what’s what on the screen.’
She closed her eyes and breathed, as the transducer slid and pressed into various parts of her abdomen, some a little uncomfortably given her full bladder. Not long after, she was told she could go to the toilet.
‘Phew!’ She dashed into the attached cubicle then returned, ready for the main event.
When the procedure continued, she looked at the screen on the wall.
‘This here,’ the sonographer said, pointing the cursor to a grey area surrounding a big black spot, ‘is your uterus.’ She continued to move the transducer and tap at the computer.
‘What’s the white circle?’ Lacie asked. ‘Is that the baby?’
‘That’s the yolk sac,’ she replied. ‘But this,’ she pointed to a small white patch next to it, ‘is the embryo, or what we call the fetal pole.’
Lacie squinted to get a better look. ‘So, it’s really there? I haven’t been imagining all this?’
‘No, definitely not. You are one hundred per cent pregnant. And this… see the tiny flicker?’
Lacie could see what might be cells on the screen, but there was a tiny bit on the white patch, or embryo, that flickered bright and fast. ‘Is that the…’
‘Heartbeat. Yes.’
Lacie’s own heart beat faster, as though trying to synchronise with the one on the screen, and an immense and unfamiliar emotion rose up within like a giant wave. She blinked a few times as moisture blurred her vision. That sight was simple perfection. Pure life, new life, living, beating, and glowing inside her.
‘Oh my God.’
‘It’s a strong heartbeat. And,’ she said as she did something on the computer, putting a couple of crosses near the embryo and drawing a line between the two, ‘measurements are consistent with seven weeks. Your estimated due date is February twenty-fifth.’
‘My due date? I hadn’t even thought about that. An approximate birthday, wow. My dad was born in February.’
‘Meant to be,’ said the sonographer. She continued with the scan and typed into the computer. ‘Your doctor will call if they need to see you, but all looks good at this stage. You can get dressed now, and I’ll send the link to the images and video to your phone.’
Wow. ‘Thank you so much.’ Lacie smiled and got up when the sonographer left the room, put the bottom half of her clothes back on, and steadied herself against the chair. She placed her hand on her belly.
There was a living, growing being inside her.
Meant to be .
‘Ooh, your hair looks lovely, sweetheart,’ Martha exclaimed, as Lacie got out of the car at South Haven. Her mother stood near the garden entrance with Nathan. ‘Love the little curls at the ends.’
‘Thanks.’ Lacie smiled, and she noticed Nathan observing her. ‘Haircuts are so much cheaper here than where I live!’
‘Lucky you could fit one in. Hey,’ her mum said, ‘I’ve invited Nathan to join us tonight. He’s done such a great job with the firepit and garden, and he’s going to put together some extra beehives and harvest honey in spring from our old beehives! I’m glad he’s doing it, there’s no way I’m getting in one of those white suits.’
‘Can’t wait,’ he said. ‘For both things.’
Lacie’s skin tingled. She had a feeling her mother would sit her and Nathan next to each other at the table, though she had no idea why as there was no hope in setting the two of them up since she lived overseas, but she didn’t mind. He was an interesting person, nice to talk to, and right now, that was a worthy distraction for her.
‘Great. I hope you don’t get overwhelmed with the Appleby family goings-on, we can be a rowdy bunch, especially when all in one room,’ Martha said to Nathan.
‘Sounds fantastic. I didn’t grow up with that, so it’ll be fun for me.’
She wondered what he did grow up with. He seemed so… alone. Not lonely, just by himself. Independent. Solitary. Like a lone tall tree growing strong and resilient in the dry Australian outback.
‘Well, I better go get the centrepiece organised, and Mum, do you want me to arrange the place cards or will you?’
‘I’ve got that all organised, don’t you worry. And we’ve added an extra table to the end of the dining table, so the kids and teens can sit on that one. Maybe make a mini version of the centrepiece for them so they feel special. I’ll be inside shortly to get back to my cooking.’
Lacie nodded and went inside. Chris’s wife and her teenaged daughters would be coming tonight. It was rare to have them all together, since the girls stayed with their biological father every second weekend. And Matt would be bringing his new girlfriend for everyone to meet, so Nathan was in for an interesting night, as they all were.
‘Hey,’ she said to Chris when she entered the living room. ‘How was your day?’
‘Not bad.’ He was piling kindling and logs into the fireplace so it’d be ready for later. He stood when he was finished and exhaled sharply.
‘You okay?’
‘Yep. I guess.’
‘Something wrong?’
He waved his hand. ‘Ah, nothing. Doesn’t matter. Just life stuff. Anyway, how was yours?’
‘It was… different.’
‘Oh, you did something to your hair.’
‘I did. I was at Welston, was nice to have a bit of a day to myself.’
‘Can’t remember having one of them for a long time,’ he mumbled. ‘Anyway, I’ve gotta pick up some drinks for tonight. Any requests? Oh wait, you still on that detox thing?’
‘Um, yeah, pretty much. I’ll have lemonade.’
‘Living on the edge, huh? Okay, catch you a bit later.’ He gave her a peck on the cheek as he walked past.
Chris had always been a bit of a grumpy pants, but he seemed more stressed than usual. Maybe it was grief too, with all the family being here, except for Dad. Everyone was feeling it in different ways.
Ellie appeared, ninja-like, at the bottom of the stairs, her black mohair jumper like a shadow.
‘Oh, Ellie. You surprised me. Whatcha got there?’
‘These old things? Apparently, they’re called CDs.’ She shrugged.
‘Ah, vintage. Music for tonight?’
‘Yep. Mum wanted some of the old stuff, so we’ve got Frank Sinatra, a Christmas compilation, some instrumental thingo, and Ella Fitzgerald. Now if only I can figure out how to work the CD player.’
Lacie smiled. Ellie didn’t speak much, but when she did, she often cracked a bit of humour, which was nice to see, as she was usually so serious about everything.
‘I’m sure you’ll work it out. I’ll be in the dining room if you have any tech trouble.’ She gave her sister a rub on the back and went to the hall table where she had left the flowers and greenery. She smiled at the memory of her mother approaching her that morning at breakfast with arms outstretched, having received her surprise bedside gift the night before. She would have to surprise her more often, maybe a regular flower delivery once she went back to America. It may not be the same as handpicked blooms in a jam jar, but it was something.
The dining table had been extended to fit twelve to fourteen people (with two people squished at each end), but an extra, small table had been added so the kids could have their own section and everyone could have a bit more elbow room. Especially now that Nathan was coming.
Lacie placed the basket on the smaller table, and began arranging the flowers and foliage as she’d practised, the large fern leaves extending lengthways along the table and the flowers gathered in an oval in the centre. She placed a large three-wick candle in the middle, made sure the wicks were trimmed to a few millimetres so it didn’t get smoky, and arranged some pine cones around the base. Jessie had indeed painted the tips with red and peach nail polish, and after that, was hooked on the fun of it; going to the garden each day to collect more to paint them all, creating a magical rainbow garden of pine cones. The grevilleas hemmed the pine cones with their elegance, and the clivias extended their exuberance toward each end over the fern leaves.
For the kids’ table, she arranged some pine cones in a shallow round bowl, and placed grevilleas around it in a pretty circle. Smaller green leaves radiated out like spokes, creating a circular centrepiece she hoped Jessie would be proud of, having her own pine cone creations centre stage.
Lacie adjusted a few things, took some photos, then stepped back and admired her handiwork. She had missed working with flowers and nature, it gave her such a warm sense of accomplishment – enhancing beauty in another way. She always emphasised to her clients that she wasn’t there to make them look beautiful, she was there to enhance the beauty already present. And help them see that it certainly did exist.
A gentle, old song wafted into the house, and Ellie entered the dining room quietly. Lacie glanced sideways, smiling. ‘What do you think?’
‘It’s perfect,’ Ellie replied.
Lacie slid an arm around Ellie’s waist, and Ellie reciprocated with hers. They stood there silently, looking at the flowers, and drinking in the music that reminded her of times gone by. And a tiny tear slid down her cheek.
Like life, this holiday wouldn’t last forever.
‘I’ll let you get back to Hannah and Jasmine,’ Nathan said to Luca, having met his friend for a late-afternoon drink when he’d finished the lunch shift at his restaurant.
‘Thanks, it’s rare I have a Friday night off, but my new chef is fantastic so I can relax knowing the place is in good hands for our busiest night of the week.’
‘Say hi to Hannah for me.’
‘Will do. Have a good night with the Applebys.’
‘I’m sure I will.’ Nathan waved him off. Luca was a lucky man. His own dream restaurant, a wife, and now a daughter. As he’d said to Nathan, life was busy and sleep deprived, but blessed.
Nathan’s was too, though in different ways. He was settled and happy, but still, part of him longed for more. He just didn’t know how to open the door that had been closed for so long.
He ducked into the supermarket and bought a large, luxury box of Belgian chocolates to take to dinner and share with the family. Martha had insisted he didn’t need to bring anything but himself, but he didn’t feel right showing up empty-handed.
He was hungry and tempted to sneak one now, but that wouldn’t leave a good impression, so he resisted. By the sounds of it, he’d have to save his appetite for tonight’s feast anyway.
He arrived home, gave his plants a quick water, then finally looked at his text messages. He hadn’t replied to the one he’d got last week from his ex, but now, there was another.
Just checking you got my last message? No worries if you’re busy. Just hoping to catch up sometime and hope all is well with you. Tess x
He thought he’d forgiven her and moved on, but he mustn’t have because seeing her message sent ripples of discomfort through his veins. Like when he’d found out the truth. It wasn’t that she was the world’s worst person, but she had hurt him, and badly.
Did he want to catch up with her, give her a chance to say whatever was on her mind? He tapped his foot on the floor and thought.
No.
Why revisit the past when the present was so much better?
He typed a reply:
Hey, just on my way out. Glad you and yours are well. I am pretty busy actually, and don’t think now is the right time. Sorry. Take care. N
He didn’t know how else to put it. He certainly wouldn’t have sent a reply that considerate just after their break-up, and he had texted some things he’d regretted when he was in the midst of the upheaval. But he didn’t see the point in letting things get heated, it never solved anything. He preferred to cut his losses calmly and then walk away. He’d learned that at a young age. Getting angry or upset only brought him trouble as a child… it was safer to keep the peace. Even if the peace wasn’t true peace, but more like resignation.
He left his phone on the kitchen counter near the chocolates and went to the bathroom, washing away the day under the hot shower. His stomach grumbled and his mind wandered with the curiosity of what would be on the menu for tonight, literally and figuratively.